rogue shifter 07 - cut off (12 page)

"Demons are not trustworthy."

"They're like any other race, a mixture of good and bad. Are all seelie fae trustworthy? I can tell you from personal experience that they aren't."

"You're gullible where Isaiah is concerned. I almost think... Perhaps he's influenced you without your knowledge."

"Father, you don't truly believe that." Aedus frowned as he spoke.

Caelen hesitated. "Forgive me. No I do not. But my experiences over time have made it difficult for me to trust anything they say. This is especially true of the royals. Isaiah is second only to Naberia."

I smiled, remembering the crazy days I've spent with Isaiah. "I've seen the truth in his eyes and his mind and his heart. He's my uncle as you're Charlie's. Look for yourself." Before he could move away, I took his hand and raised it to my temple, opening my mind and lowering my shields.

His eyes widened in shock because by doing this, I'd left myself completely vulnerable. His power could tear through my mind and turn it to cream of wheat, leaving me his puppet to manipulate as he chose. He could force me to bring Charlie to Cascade and then lock me somewhere far off or even kill me.

Lord Caelen's expression softened when he saw the confidence I had in his integrity, the respect I held for him, and the affection.

I placed my hand over his, still holding it in place. "I trust Isaiah with Charlie's life as I'm trusting you with Garrett's and mine. Please help me get Garrett back so that Charlie can come home. I need your help, Lord Caelen. I can't bring him home without it."

He dropped his hand, smiling for the first time since I'd entered the room. "Jacqueline. You are fearless and foolishly impulsive. So like a child."

"Fearless? Never. Right now I'm terrified that Fionna will kill Garrett. But the foolish part?" I shrugged. "I'm a female without her mate. I'm entitled to a few minutes of crazy behavior."

We stared at each other in silence for ten heartbeats. That's a long time to lock gazes with a fae male who'd been around when Rome fell to barbarian hordes. My heart was pounding so loudly I figured all of Cascade would hear it beating out the rhythm of my terror but also my hope.

Lord Caelen broke the silence. "I will come to you when Fionna delivers her next message. We will bring him home together. When things are settled, you and I will continue our conversation."

Deciding not to spend useless energy worrying about that next conversation, I jumped out of my chair. "Thank you." Hugging him, I smiled with relief when I felt him hug me back. Behind Caelen, Aedus saluted me like a soldier on the history channel. It appeared my world was corrupting even him.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Isaiah soaked in the hot tub while I sat on the edge, my pants rolled up to my knees and my bare feet tickled by the bubbling jets.

He opened one eye and frowned at me. "Ask." He shook his head at my startled expression. "You're too easy to read. You need to work on your poker face."

I flattened my mouth, preparing myself for another refusal. "What's the big secret?"

"Secret?" He avoided my gaze, running a hand through the bubbles in a figure eight pattern.

"The thing that nobody will tell me. The thing that makes people whisper and then shut up the minute they see me. It's been the elephant in the room my whole life. It must be something bad, or someone would've spilled."

"Ask your mother."

"I have. She lies and says there's nothing. I've also asked Dad, Sash, Rick, Liam and Farrell. They all tell me to ask Mom."

"Good advice."

I fisted my hands. "I don't want to get lied to again. Look, I know she thinks she's protecting me, but I can take it, whatever it is. Do I have some kind of degenerative disease that's gonna kill me at thirty? Is Mom dying? Is..."

"Charles, she doesn't want you to know. She's made us promise."

"If it's about me, I have the right to know. Be honest, is it about me?"

"Yes."

"I'm an adult. I'm taking responsibility and working my ass off, not just here but at home, too."

"I've asked her to tell you. The fae even agree with me." He sounded just as frustrated as I did. "Garrett would tell you if she'd agree, but it shouldn't come from anyone but Jackie."

I groaned. "Can't you give me hints or something? Then I can at least guess what it is."

As Isaiah's eyes narrowed in anger, the bubbles in the hot tub started to heat. I pulled my feet out fast, afraid of getting scalded. Guess I should have waited, but the time never seemed right.

Magical vibrations bounced around the room like pea sized hail, stinging my skin. Isaiah swirled the water with his fingers and the liquid sculpture of a familiar fae male rose up in the middle of the spa. He flicked his thumb and middle finger together and the head detached, floating above the rest. The fluid body collapsed back into the bubbles, but the head spun inches away from Isaiah's face.

He hissed. "Fuck it. I'm sick of protecting him." The head exploded in a shower of spa water, covering me in a light spray. "Ask me how I met Jacqueline."

Shocked and excited to finally hear the truth, I didn't waste any time. "How did you meet Mom?"

It took him sixteen minutes, because he'd started off with how mom first met Kennet at the duel. Then he described how a month later he was summoned by Kennet to act as a guard for a female Kennet had described as his new lady. Kennet had kept my mom in a small room, cut off from Garrett and her magic. When Isaiah got near the end of the story he stopped.

"He whipped her?" My body had begun to tremble, my anger only just contained. Isaiah nodded. "What year was this?"

"2010."

Holy crap. He didn't need to say another word. I slumped, wrapping my arms around my stomach to keep from going nuts. "He raped her. He raped her and she got pregnant."

"Charles, listen. Even though I was no longer able to help her, your mother still found the strength to unravel the block and get herself out of that hole. It was a transcendent moment for her. The experience did not destroy her spirit. She grew in strength."

I couldn't focus on anything else. "All this time I thought my birth was because of some kind of in-vitro thing so she could have a kid with Garrett. I imagined that Kennet had just said, 'Sure—I'll donate sperm. No problem." I clenched both hands and stood, pacing the room. "But I don't get it. When she found out she was pregnant because of the—why did she keep me? Why would she want me? I'm a constant reminder of what he did."

"Stop." I stood still and met his gaze. "Have you ever felt unloved?"

I thought about all the hugs and kisses and smiles. "Never. It's kinda the opposite. She gives overly protective a whole new meaning."

"Jacqueline saw you as an innocent, which you were." He laughed. "She loved you so much that she summoned me against our agreement. I almost killed her for reneging. Another demon wouldn't have hesitated."

Assorted facts clicked into place. "That's when she made the agreement for you to train me, and in return, you made her work for you here." He nodded. I leaned against the wall, running a hand through my unbound hair. "She must've been hoping for a normal kid, but she got slammed by the prophesy and then...then Faerie and the DR wanting to use me in their war. I've been way more trouble than she expected."

"You've been a good son. The prophesy is more your problem than hers."

"Why do you think she didn't want me to know about the...the rape?" It was hard to say. I couldn't imaging how hard it had been to live through.

He shrugged. "She thought you might blame yourself. Or perhaps feel anger toward her."

A strange sound erupted from my mouth, something similar to a snarl. "Anger toward
her
?" My skin heated as my dagger appeared in my hand, even though I'd locked it in the cabinet in the gym.

Isaiah's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Well done, young demon. We'll work on this further."

"Training can wait." I spun the dagger between my fingers in a steady rhythm, an exercise Isaiah had taught me. My rage fed it with energy, my aura snaking through the carvings, making the metal glimmer. As he watched me, my great-uncle's eyes had turned as orange as mine. He was feeding on my anger, which was just fine with me, 'cause I had plenty to spare.

"Kennet is dead." My tone had dropped an octave.

"I'd be happy to assist you in this mission, however, think long and hard. He is pure blood seelie fae. He is the three thousand year old half-brother of the queen, a direct descendent of Finvarra. He fights with his mind twice as well as you fight with that dagger. Kennet would've killed Aedus, if it wasn't for your mother's intervention, and Aedus is pure blood and over sixteen hundred years old."

"But..."

"You cannot win against him. At least not yet."

"Maybe I can do more than you think."

"I know your magical potential better than anyone else. Better even than you do. I know that you've been experimenting secretly and that's good up to a point. I approve. The Cascade fae hold you back, as do your parents. I understand their perspective but don't agree with it."

"He hurt her."

"He did. Badly. I tortured him for two months. He broke after two weeks. Still it wasn't enough

"She's next."

"Charles, look at me." I did, reluctantly. "Think. Killing him might divide the fae into two factions—weakening them for the war. Do you want that?"

"Of course not, but how can I let him live after what he did?"

He shrugged. "Let him help you win the battle against Naberia and then take him out when he doesn't expect it. He'd do the same in your shoes."

"Yeah, he would." Kennet was a calculating bastard. "Your idea isn't exactly honorable. My dad wouldn't approve."

"Does that snake deserve an honorable end? Garrett would understand, believe me."

"The bastard made her take me to him twice a year. I knew she wasn't happy about it but I never thought... Oh man. She must have been freaking out the whole time."

"Don't tell her that you know."

"What? That's stupid."

"It'll hurt her. She's been hurt enough."

Isaiah was worried about her, even protective. "Are you crushin' on my mom?"

He laughed at my outraged expression. "I had a crush on
her
mom, only that's between us guys."

"But wasn't she...like...your sister?"

"Adele was my half sister, but the age difference was over three thousand years. That span weakens the feel of an actual sibling link. Plus she grew up in your world, not mine."

"Oh, well I guess that's okay. Dad and I'd have to kick your butt otherwise," I teased him.

"Dream on, demon spawn." He slid under the bubbles and then disappeared.

I sent the dagger back simply by thinking it away, then undressed and sank into the water, needing the soothing warmth along with the time to think through everything I'd learned. It helped to know that Mom was safe at home and wouldn't be going anywhere near the court and Kennet.

CHAPTER TWENTY

Liam and I sat together on an outcropping of slate rock overlooking the ocean, a secluded place we visited on a regular basis whenever we felt the need for a private conversation. The first time he'd brought me here we'd discussed if I was able to finally put the kidnapping behind me. Liam had been instrumental in my recovery, but while we'd talked, he'd accidentally dropped the bombshell that I'd been raped, an event I'd psychologically blocked. That led to a day of chaotic indecision, followed by a lifetime of certainty as far as my baby, Charlie, was concerned.

From that day on, we thought of this private spot as a place where we could talk about anything and everything. Our friendship had grown exponentially over the years, Liam becoming the one person, other than Garrett, who I felt I could always trust with my most fragile feelings. And I did often, as he trusted me with his.

I'd suggested that we come here today, because I'd sensed that Liam was troubled, and I had a pretty good idea what bothered him.

He was dressed in his usual attire when he wasn't in Faerie: a button down shirt and jeans. We'd taken off our shoes, rolled up our pants and were dangling our feet in the cold spray misting up from below.

"Have you heard from Isaiah or Charlie?" he asked.

"No, but if anything was wrong, one of them would contact me."

"Aedus told me about your meeting with Father. He was happy with how it went. I'm not sure Father is satisfied, but he rarely is these days." He scowled at the horizon.

"Lord Caelen's coming with me?"

"Of course. There was never any doubt about that. Father lives by a strict code, and Garrett is an ally." He shrugged, trying to act nonchalant, but I could feel his frustration at being left out of the delegation.

I spoke softly. "He wants to keep you away from Fionna."

"I should be there with you." His eyes sparkled with gold, a sign of intense emotion. "Garrett has been my friend for over one hundred years, and you for over sixteen. I'm so angry, I can't look at my father, let alone speak to him."

I reached out, placing my hand on his shoulder, a shoulder I'd cried on many a time. "I want you with me, but not if it puts you in danger."

He stood with a quick grace unique to the fae and began to pace near the edge. "Why would I be in more danger than you? You can't use your demon magic in Faerie, but I'll have full access to
my
magic. It doesn't make sense."

"Your father left the court to protect you."

He turned his back to me, his stance tense. "Pfft. Is that what he told you? He left the court because he didn't want the responsibility of ruling our people."

"Fionna and her followers were cruel to you."

He turned back and lowered himself beside me. "Do you honestly believe that I was the only half-human fae living at court? Did he take any of the others with him when he left, even though he knew Fionna might mistreat them? No. Our spies say they've suffered because of his...his cowardice."

"He takes responsibility for his actions. He told me so himself ten years ago, when I was first negotiating with him to allow Isaiah to train Charlie. He gave everyone the option to join him in Cascade. Most chose to stay."