Authors: Raven Monet
Romance: Sports Romance: ON SIDE (Secret Baby Pregnancy Football Romance) (Contemporary New Adult Fiction) (18 page)
I’d gone back into the office expecting to find a sickly looking Lori, and instead, I’d come across her father who was absolutely furious at me. I was becoming increasingly convinced that he was actually going to hit me.
Somehow he’d found out my real identity and he was fuming loudly, not caring who could hear him.
“...and don’t think I won’t call the police because I will...”
“Look, I...” Every time I tried to defend myself, he jumped all over me, not letting me get a word in edgeways. I wanted to tell him that my plan had changed, that I’d actually been helping his company, but there was no way I was going to be able to get him to see sense. He was far too riled up and angry.
Then, I spotted Lori walking back into the room, and my heart fell into my shoes. Clearly her father had already spoken to her, and she’d completely gotten the wrong end of the stick when it came to us – it was written all over her face.
She hated me, she thought I’d used her. She would never trust me again, and it was all my own damn fault. I should have confessed before it came to this – why had I buried my head in the sand? I should have guessed that the truth was going to come out eventually. If I’d talked this beforehand, I could have controlled how I came across.
Now, I was completely and utterly screwed.
Her dad was still screaming at me, but I couldn’t hear what he was saying anymore. It was all white noise. All I could focus on was Lori and the way she was looking at me like she wanted to ground to open up and swallow me whole.
“I want you to get out!” He screamed in my face, desperate for me to hear. “Get out and never come back.”
“Okay,” I whispered. There was no point in arguing anymore. It wasn’t getting any of us anywhere. “I’ll go.”
Then he left the room to go and get security, giving me a much needed minute with Lori, but she held up her hand, not letting me talk.
“I know who you are, and I know what you did.” She whispered, sounding absolutely heartbroken.
“I...” Again, I wasn’t going to get the chance to defend myself.
“I don’t want to hear anything that you have to say. I just want you to go.” Her tone was cold; she really meant what she was saying.
“It wasn’t...”
“No.” She was firm, she wouldn’t take anything from me today, I could tell. “I just think you should know that your actions have consequences. Serious ones. I might have only been a game to you, but now I’m pregnant.” Her voice cracked with the emotion of it all. “Now, you need to go.”
Pregnant?
And then she walked from the room, leaving me dazed and confused, and completely and utterly alone.
Pregnant!
Was she pregnant? Was she carrying my child? I didn’t know how to feel about that at all – I knew we’d been a bit risky, not really considering contraception, but I hadn’t really been thinking about the consequences of that. Lori had been right about that much, but I didn’t want to leave. I could tell that much about myself! I wanted to stay, I wanted to love her, I wanted to get used to the idea of becoming parents together.
I didn’t want the mother of my child to think that I was the scum of the Earth, but what could I do?
I halfway decided to chase after her, to explain, but I knew that it would do no good. She needed time to calm down, just like her father did. If I tried to communicate with her now, I would only end up making things so much worse.
It was safe to say that utterly fucked!
Eventually, the security guards turned up, and they guided me to the outside, and far away from the woman I loved, and the child that she was carrying.
The worst part was, it was all that I deserved.
“Do you want to know what you’re having?” The doctor asked, running the ultrasound across my stomach. The cool gel was uncomfortable, as was my very full bladder, but I wasn’t concentrating on the negatives. Just the life that was steadily growing inside of me. “Or do you want a surprise?”
“No, please tell me.” I’d had enough shocks to last me a lifetime; I wanted to know a little more about what my future held. My life had been such a mess or months and months – this baby was the only thing that was allowing me to hold it together!
After Dexter had been forced from the office, I had resigned my position too, explaining that I was about to have a baby. There was no way I could have stayed there, working with people that hated me, surrounded by the memories of what might have been. It was too painful. Everything Dexter related damn near killed me. My dad had understood – sort of – and had given me money to get started on my own, but now that he knew I was pregnant by the man who had tried to overthrow his business, he was being far less understanding. I hadn’t told him right away that Dexter was the father, but eventually, I’d been forced to confess.
That argument was something that I wanted to erase from my memory forever!
Dexter had tried to contact me on many, many occasions over the months, but I just didn’t want to know. I might have missed him like crazy, but I hated him for what he’d put me through. I had been falling for him, growing serious feelings for him, and he only saw me as a pawn in the game. He didn’t deserve to know anything about me or my baby.
He probably wasn’t ringing up for that anyway. He probably just saw me as good to go, useful for a bit of fun.
Urgh, I hated who he had turned me into.
“It’s a little girl.” The doctor turned to smile at me, and my heart lifted into my throat. A tear fell from my eye and trickled down my cheek. I was scared – absolutely terrified about motherhood – but I was excited too. This was going to be an adventure, and I couldn’t wait.
Who knew, this might be something that I would actually be amazing at. Maybe motherhood would be my life’s purpose. I hadn’t even had my baby yet, and I already knew that I would give her my life.
“And she looks very healthy, which is wonderful news.”
As I looked at the grainy black and white image on the screen, nothing else mattered. It wasn’t important how this little girl had come into being, just that she was. I was going to give her the best life, no matter what it took. I didn’t need Dexter, or my father, to do that. I could do it all by myself.
I wasn’t sure how, but I’d figure that out.
I felt an inner strength grow inside me that had never been before, and I grinned inanely at the doctor. “Thank you,” I said breathily. “Thank you so much.” I looked at the screen once more. “Can I have a picture?”
“Of course.” He set up the machine so that the image of my little girl began to print. “So, do you have any ideas for names yet?” He began making conversation with me, which was sweet, but I didn’t want to discuss my daughter with anyone. I felt like she was mine, and mine alone, and I didn’t want to share her with anyone.
“No, not yet.”
As he handed me the image, and I walked outside the hospital with it, I clutched it to my chest, knowing that my life was on its way to being complete. It might have been a mess and a shambles at the moment, but it wouldn’t be. I was determined to make it amazing, no matter what it took.
Nothing made sense anymore; my entire life was a mess. Lori wouldn’t talk to me, my empire was falling apart underneath me, and I had no idea what to do. I needed to make some massive changes in my life, but I didn’t know where to start.
It didn’t matter that I had no idea where Lori was, or what was going on with her life, I knew that she was out there somewhere, carrying my baby, and that was enough to make me want more. I didn’t want this criminal lifestyle anymore; I wanted to go on the straight and narrow. Even if Lori never let me see my baby, I wanted to be a positive role model for my child. I wanted to be the best man that I could possibly be, and I couldn’t do that until I shook everything up.
“What’cha doing?” Kev wandered over and asked me. My home was filled to the brim with people as normal, but now it was pissing me off. I used to love and crave the company, but now I wanted to be alone. I didn’t want to be surrounded by druggies and drunks – I couldn’t change until they were all gone.
The people I associated with were a massive part of the problem, and I needed them gone.
They’d all been tiptoeing around me after the Empire Technology plan fell apart – even though none of them knew the real details – so I knew they wouldn’t be totally offended if I had a little outburst. They would just put it down to me slowly losing it.
“I want everyone to get out,” I said to him, quietly.
“Huh?” He leaned in closer to me.
“I want everyone to get the fuck out!” I yelled. “Will you all just leave? I need some God damn time to myself, and you’re all making so much fucking noise.”
“Okay, woah bro.” Kev patted my shoulder. “We’ll go. Can I do anything to help?”
“No.” I snapped, much harsher than I intended. “Just leave.”
A few moments later, I was finally by myself, and I could get to work on my newest plan. I sat down at the table that sat in my dining room, deciding that the best place to start was to note down everything that I wanted to get rid of. Then I would work on where I wanted to go next. It was going to be a massive, arduous task, but it was absolutely essential.
Once I knew where I was, and where I wanted to be, I could work out the steps to get there.
***
I’d never worked so damn hard in my entire life. Even building up my criminal empire had been easier than this, but that was because I found it simple. This was difficult, but it was also positive.
I was slowly riding my life of the toxicity, of everything that was bad. It was challenging because there was so damn much of it, but I knew that I had to get through it all to come up with the outcome I wanted.
I wasn’t even doing it for Lori anymore – I knew there was very little chance that she would ever take me back after what I’d done, and I needed to accept that. I wasn’t just doing it for the baby either; I was doing it for me. For the first time ever, I wanted more. I wanted to be the best man that I could be, and I was finally focusing all of my energy into achieving that.
It felt damn good too!
I stood outside the Empire Technology office, wishing that I could just go inside and speak to my dad, but things were still too strained between us. He still hadn’t forgiven me for what he saw as a betrayal. It didn’t matter that I hadn’t known who Dexter was; his stubborn mind was made up. I rubbed my swollen belly, hoping that once this baby came – which wouldn’t be long now – the rift would start to heal.
I was certain that he wouldn’t be able to resist a newborn, his granddaughter, however, mad he was.
“Lori?” A meek voice rang out from behind me, causing me to spin around quickly. There I saw a face that I hadn’t been graced with for a very long time, and it only took one sighting for all of my negative feelings to float away. The look in his eyes had me melting for him all over again – the anger, the upset, the frustration... it all became nothing.
“Dexter?” I gasped. He’d called me and texted me a lot, but he hadn’t actually come to see me. He’d respected my wishes that much, for which I’d been grateful for. But now that I was looking at him, it was difficult to remember why. “What are you doing here?”
“Look, I know I don’t deserve it, but can I please have a minute of your time?” He looked so different – the arrogance, the cockiness, it was all gone. He seemed raw and vulnerable, and I couldn’t stop my heart from wanting to reach out to him.
He was the father of my child. Whatever he’d done, I couldn’t deny him the chance to explain. I owed him, and our daughter, that much.
“Okay,” I replied simply. “But I want total honesty from you. No more lies, no more bullshit.”
“Of course.”
He led me to a nearby cafe, where he brought me a drink. Then he sat in front of me and smiled weakly at me. “Okay, I don’t know where to begin.” He paused thoughtfully, before starting at what I assumed was the beginning. “My original plan was to take down your father’s company, I admit that, but you – and what we had – was never a part of that. My feelings for you were real. I’m sorry that you got caught in the crossfire of my shitty decisions.”
I nodded, gulping down all the emotion that flooded through me. I wanted so desperately to believe what he was saying, but I had to hold myself back. I needed to be smart; I couldn’t let my heart rule me again. That had never worked out in my favor!
“Ever since that day, I’ve been trying to sort my life out. I don’t expect you to take me back, but I want to be a good role model to our child. I’ve sold all my businesses and set aside all my shadier activities. Now, I’m building up my own company from scratch. A marketing company – working with you made me see that I had a talent in that area.”
We smiled at each other at the memories of our marketing meetings, and where they led.
“I don’t expect you to give me any sort of shot...”
“A girl.” I jumped in, interrupting him. “We’re having a girl.”
“Oh my God, really?” Tears filled his eyes. “A girl?”
I couldn’t help but grin at him. This felt like us, the us we’d been before it all went to hell and I realized how much I missed it. I missed him. Sure, he’d done some crappy stuff, but it seemed like he was doing his best to change. I wanted to believe him; I wanted to try once more. I hadn’t expected that when I came here, but the feeling was strong now.
I put my hand over his, hoping that he would take the hint, and he leaned in to kiss me, but just before his lips hit mine, I screamed out in agony.
“What’s wrong?” He panicked, grabbing hold of me.
“Ooh.” A pool of water gathered at my feet. “My waters have broken. The baby is coming!”
