Authors: Carly White
Chapter 7
Curt
I had to get a manager the last week before the draft. There was just too much information and people trying to talk to me at once and a manager seemed like a good filter to most of the mess. I had too many things on my mind and Lana was one of the big ones.
I wanted to go local or as local as the team in our state, but they weren’t as excited for me as Texas. Houston would pay twice as much for twice as long and it was by far the best deal. I wouldn’t have minded going to Texas, but I wanted to see what happened with Lana. When I mentioned this to Leo my new manager, he just looked at me like I was crazy.
“You can’t give up your career already for a female. Do you know how many women are going to be throwing themselves at you, trying to get a piece of what you got?”
I shook my head. I did know and that was one of the main reasons that I wanted it to be Lana by my side. She had several more years of school though and I didn’t know if she would move all the way to Texas. It was a lot to ask someone without some guarantee of forever. While I may have been ready to take the plunge, I didn’t think that she was ready. If I asked and she wasn’t, I would have gone too far and there is no going backwards in a relationship. I hadn’t even asked her to go out with me officially, let alone moving in together across the country and marriage.
He was looking at me with that superior, you are just a dumb kid look and I shook my head again. “That is why I want to stay. She was there before the money and all of the rest. That’s how you know it is real, Lana is different.”
Leo wasn’t going to argue with me, but it was almost like he was just going with it. I realized he had to. He worked for me as it were. “It doesn’t matter my reasons, they are mine. What matters is that you get me a better deal with Charleston.”
“I will do what I can, but they already have two quarterbacks on contract for three more years. Unless someone gets injured, there isn’t going to be a whole lot of need for you.”
I knew that, I had seen the same information that he had, but I wanted to stay close to home. The money never really did matter. I would be close to family and not completely out of the loop. Then there was Lana. She was there and I knew that I didn’t want to go too much further away from her. She was the real reason I was so interesting in staying close to home and though nothing was official, I had to make it happen, which meant that Leo had to make it happen.
“If that is the best you can get for them, than it will be better than nothing.”
He looked incredulous and I almost felt sorry for the guy. He worked on commission, but he was still going to get a hefty fee, the math didn’t lie. It wouldn’t be as big as Texas, but nothing ever was.
“I will do what you want. I guess if you look at it like that… Can I be frank with you Curt?”
Here it comes I thought. I was waiting for it so it was better to let him get it off of his chest. “I think you are making a big mistake. I know that you are feeling very strongly for this girl and maybe you will end up together, but with this kind of money, maybe you should talk to her about it, see what she thinks. Sleep on it and then call me in the morning. If that is what you want to do, I am here for you Curt.”
I thanked him though I didn’t think that my mind would change. I hadn’t thought about asking Lana about it. It put too much pressure on something that to me was still too delicate, but maybe Leo was right. Maybe I should talk to her about it and see what she thinks.
“I will do that Leo. Thanks for the advice. I will give you a call in the morning.
***
“Lana can I come see you?”
“Um, sure. Where are you?”
“Outside.”
“Oh, okay. Well I just got back from work so I am not looking very good.”
“I bet you are as beautiful as ever.”
“Yeah right. I will be out in a minute.”
I waited for her in my car and she still had her uniform on from the diner, though I was right, she was just as pretty as she always was. Now that I knew what was possible between us, I was more nervous than ever. I was the smitten one, when usually it was the other way around. Smiling as she got in, she looked over at me. “Are you sure you don’t want me to at least change first?”
I leaned over to give her a light kiss. It quickly became more as I tasted her softness and I wanted more. She was the one that pushed me back, reminding me that we were sitting in her parent’s driveway.
“Sorry, you’re right Lana. You just make me so crazy.”
“Uh huh, so what are we doing?”
“I want to ask you something first.”
I could see her getting ready for a serious conversation. It must have been my face that gave it away, telling her that it was time to pay attention. “Okay, what’s up?”
“You heard who is offering for me, right?”
“Yeah I heard about Texas, that they were making a big bid. They didn’t back out, did they?”
“No, but it is really far away.”
“You have to go where the money is. You only have a few good years to play, so you might as well make it count.”
“I know, but it is a long ways away.”
She looked away for a minute, out the window and towards where she had come from. “Yeah but you can’t stay here forever.”
“I like what is going on here though.”
I touched her arm and when she looked back I could tell that something was bothering her. “I like what is going on here too, but I don’t want to stand in your way. That is just silly and we barely know each other.”
“I know about the spot on your neck that drives you crazy.”
She pushed away and sighed. “Yeah, there is that, but it’s not worth the millions you would lose not taking the deal.”
“I think it would be worth it.”
Her eyes flicked up to mine and I knew then that I was going to have to go wherever I needed to. As long as I got to stay with her, then none of it really mattered. Either way it would be more money than I would need or spend in the end.
“You’re crazy. That is a lot of money to pass up.”
She didn’t seem to be getting the connection or she was being purposefully obtuse. “I don’t want to lose you Lana. If I move to Texas, I will never see you.”
“I am sure you will find another girl to fill your time.”
Lana moved to get out and I stopped her. She was mad or upset, something and I wasn’t sure why. The conversation was not going as I had hoped it would and I couldn’t help but curse Leo in my mind. I had a feeling that asking her so soon would not be a good idea.
“Wait Lana. What just happened? Why are you upset?”
“I’m not. I just don’t want to talk about you leaving.”
I was confused or she was purposefully doing it. “I was saying that I was going to stay.”
“But if you do, you will resent me for it later. You have to do what is best for you. We had a good time together and all, but it was just a fling.”
Now I was the incredulous one. “Just a fling? I am thinking of marrying you and walking away from five million dollars and you are calling what we have a fling?”
“Marry me?”
I smiled and pulled her in for a kiss. She didn’t kiss me back, still too shocked from our conversation. “See? That is what I mean. I say five million dollars and all you hear is marriage.”
“Money is just paper. Why would you think about wanting to marry me?”
“Because I love you.”
“You do?”
“How could I not?”
“So why are you going to lose that money?”
“Because you have three more years of school here. I can’t ask you to leave your life for me.”
“I would.”
Her words stopped me and I realized I was still holding her. Lana’s eyes were bright and she had happiness on her face that I had been feeling well up inside of me for some time. It was good to see that it wasn’t only me mad in love. “Would you?”
She nodded her head slowly, leaning towards me for a kiss. It was the first one that she had ever initiated and it made it that much sweeter. Everything was changing for the best and I couldn’t believe that I had almost just walked away from it all without even asking her what she wanted to do. It was clear to me now that I was going to get it everything I had ever wanted and more. I no longer wanted to live the players life. I had Lana and she was all I could ever want.
Addicted
Chapter 1
“How are you doing Gran?”
Mara looked down at the old woman sitting down on the edge of the bed. She had just gotten in and pulled back the shades on the windows, letting the light shine in.
“I’m feeling alright. What time is it?”
“Almost noon Gran. Have you been staying up watching your soaps again?”
She shrugged and started to move the blankets back. Mara helped her some before she got up and went to the tray with her untouched breakfast. “I can’t help it. They have a channel that runs them all day. Did you know about that?”
Mara smiled and shook her head. “No, but you have to get some sleep. The director called me again. He is concerned about you.”
With a wave of her hand, the old woman got up and started towards the bathroom. “I don’t have time for all their activities. I would much rather play cards with Edith.”
Mara didn’t know what to think of her Gran. She was having one of her good days and since coming to Shady Pines, she was having more of them. Mara had wanted to keep her at home, but her grandmother had been so lonely since her husband died and at Shady Pines, there were lots of people her age for her to converse with. She was happier there and though Mara missed her terribly, she knew it was for the best.
The only problem was that Gran didn’t like to follow the rules. She was the rebel in the family and to have her only son so clean, it made for interesting upraising. Gran drove the directors that ran the nursing home off the wall with her rebel ways, but Mara had always admired that about her. She did whatever she wanted, no matter what people might think about that. Mara was always too worried about what people would think to ever really put herself out there.
She waited for her Gran to come back out of the bathroom, moving the uneaten food to the garbage and taking the tray to set up for lunch. They had lunch together every Wednesday and that day Mara had brought some soup. It was getting cold outside and it was Gran’s own recipe that she liked to make when the weather changed.
“It smells good Mara. Did you put the cinnamon and cayenne flakes in?”
Mara nodded. “Of course. No need to change perfection, right?”
The old woman had gotten dressed and she combed her hair back as she looked at her granddaughter in the mirror. It could have almost been her own reflection forty years before. The resemblance was uncanny and Gran liked that a part of her that looked so much like her, was going to carry on long after she was gone. She hoped that Mara too would have a daughter.
Mara had the same pale blonde hair and light blue eyes. It made her stand out and even as Gran’s depths started to fade, she loved to see herself reborn in Mara. She had always wanted a daughter, but only had one son, Mara’s father Alex. Mara was the closest that she was ever going to get and it was enough.
“I wouldn’t say it was perfect, but I hadn’t changed a thing since my mother made it. I am so glad you took to cooking. I tried at one time to get Alex involved in the kitchen, but he couldn’t be bothered. You know how he is, always looking to save the world. Dumplings were never high on his list.” pushing you to go into law as well. I am glad you didn’t”
Mara smiled and sat down with her, serving her some soup in a deep bowl. “I am a lot like him as well. I still can’t go over to Europe or travel like I want to. I just don’t have the guts for it like you did Gran.”
“You will one day. Once you stop worrying about what everyone else thinks. You have to worry less about other people and more about what makes you happy. You can’t tell me that going into social work is really what you want to do.”
Mara bristled. “It will help people Gran.”
“Yes and that is all well and good, but it isn’t what makes you happy.”
“There are lots of things that make me happy. Like not getting a call every couple of days from Mr. Bishop about your wily ways. I thought you liked it here?”
“I do. He is just fussing. As long as that check keeps going to be him every month, it is all talk. He is not going to do anything. I would suggest just not answering. But good job changing the subject. I will let it go.”
Mara had thought about it, but every time she saw that number, she was always so sure that something had happened to her Gran and she couldn’t help but not make sure she was okay. “I will keep that in mind, but I worry about you when I see that number. I wish sometimes you were back home, even though I know that you like it here.”
“Don’t worry about me Mara. I can run circles around the guys around here. I worry about you in this tiny town. Nothing is going to happen here and you are never going to get a career writing here. You need to move to a big city, travel some.”
Mara agreed, but it was actually doing it that scared her. She was not as bold as she wished she was. Nothing was ever going to happen to her in Hartford. On the outskirts of Indianapolis, Mara thought sometimes of going to the city and getting on with a magazine or newspaper. But it was all just fantasies and she never followed through. She was two years out of high school and instead of going to college, she was still working at the same job since she was a Junior. While she kicked around the idea of schooling for public work, Gran was right to say that it just wasn’t in her heart to do.
“It’s not so bad here and I will travel, someday. Besides, I don’t know what dad would do without me. You know he works too much.”
Gran shook her head and looked down for a minute. Mara could tell she was upset and not saying anything was the only way to get through the silence in the room.
“Sorry. I wish there was more I could do. Alex has just shut down. After your mom left, I don’t know what happened to him. But it was always the job first. He never was very emotional. Do you see her at all?”
Mara knew that she was talking about her mom. She hadn’t seen her in months. The woman was having a midlife crisis and had run off with one of the young men in her office. Her father had been devastated, but true to his nature, instead of being upset, he had taken on more work to bury his problems. This left Mara to stay put. When she had thought to go off to college, her mom beat her to the jump and Mara felt like she had to stay.
“I haven’t seen her since she took off with Dante. You know how she was. She was flaky when she was here, so not much has changed. I keep hoping that dad will find a girlfriend, but he has some big case he has been working on. The trial is supposed to start next week, so hopefully it will be over soon and he will have a little breathing room before his next case he will obsess about.”
“Do you know what it is about?”
Mara shrugged and started to pick up from the dinner. “I’m not sure what it’s about, something about a motorcycle gang from Indianapolis killed a guy out here and they got one of them standing trial over it here in Putnam county. Dad thinks it will make him a star. You know how he gets in front of a camera.”
“I saw him on the news, but by the time I found the remote to turn the sound on, it was going off.”
“Yeah, it’s because of this case. I will be happy when it is over. It has been a media frenzy and I don’t like it when he is dealing with those kinds of guys. We don’t have that kind of thing here in Hartford and when we do, it is always a big-city outside raising a ruckus.”
They both went silent for a time. Mara cleaned up the small apartment and did a few small things that Gran wanted done. She spent the rest of the evening painting the mural that Gran wanted. It was a beach picture. The only thing she had asked for was a sunny sky and sand to look at. Gran knew her traveling days were over and the painting was a way to escape for just a moment.
“This is what you should be doing Mara.”
“I do paint Gran. All the time.”
“You know what I mean.”
“I do, but it doesn’t pay to paint or write around here.”
“Money doesn’t matter in the end Mara.”
“It does when bills come up, besides I will get time to be as creative as I want one day. I’ve been thinking about moving to Indianapolis, but with the big case going on, I will wait to let dad know. He thinks the city is too dangerous and wants me to stay in Hartford forever.”
“I would like that as well, but you have to go on and make your way now. Nothing is ever going to happen here.”
“Maybe you’re right. I have been thinking about it more. You know he is not going to be happy about it.”
“You let me worry about Alex. I want you to promise me that you will at least take a day trip down there before next week. Just get a feel for the place. It’s been so long since we went. Put in a couple of resumes and just see what happens. I have a good feeling about it.”
Mara promised that she would. Looking up at the clock, it was almost time for her to go and she wished she had more time. But she had a shift at the bookstore to get to. It wasn’t her dream job, but it was enough for the moment. Soon, she kept promising herself. Something was going to happen.