Room for You (34 page)

“Flip flops?” She looked at me, confused.

I laughed. “I’ll explain later.”

Piper’s body looked tiny and fragile lying so still in that big hospital bed. Her head was wrapped in white gauze to keep her wound sterile, an oxygen mask covered her nose and mouth and her little arm had an IV sticking out of it. Purple bruises were already forming on the right side of her face, sprinkled with a few scrapes. It gutted me to see her like that; I wished more than anything it had been me in that lake instead of her.

Someone knocked softly on the door.

“Can I come in?” my mom whispered as she peeked her head in the room.

“Yeah, come on in,” I said, relieved she was here. “She’s still out.”

My mom gasped and froze when she walked through the door and saw Piper. “Oh my God,” was all she muttered, her eyes watering as she pulled her hands up over her mouth.

“She’s okay, Mom.” I smiled reassuringly.

“It’s hard to see her like that.” Her voice was shaky.

“I know.”

She walked over and pulled up the other chair next to me, not taking her eyes off Piper. “What did the doctors say?”

“They did the CT scan. She has a bad concussion, plus the gash on her head.” I sighed, thinking about how yesterday at this time we were hula hooping in the backyard without a care in the world. Crazy how fast life can change. “The doctor said he doesn’t think she got hit head on, that maybe she was under the water when it happened.”

Mom’s head whipped around to face me. “What do you mean?”

“He thinks she happened to go under the water seconds before she was hit, the bruising on her shoulder is even worse. Had she been all the way above water, it could have been … really bad.”

Mom looked back at Piper and closed her eyes. Her lips moved but no sound came out; I knew she was praying.

“Anyway, they are definitely keeping her overnight, maybe for a couple nights. It all depends on the swelling in her brain. They’ll do another scan tomorrow.”

“Will there be any permanent damage?” she asked hesitantly.

“They don’t think so, but we won’t know for sure until she’s awake. The doctor thinks she’ll be just fine in a few weeks.”

She reached over and put her hand on mine, squeezing it. “Thank God.”

Indeed.

“How is Lucy?” I asked.

“She’s okay.” Mom smiled at me and tried her best to sound normal. “Brody got her a grilled cheese sandwich and some apple juice. Honestly, she’s loving all the attention out there. Everyone is falling all over her.”

“Who’s everyone?”

“Oh … Fred, Shae, Brody and his parents.”

“Brody’s
parents
?”

“Yep, they got here a little while ago, and they’re wonderful. I’m not surprised by that though, Brody is pretty wonderful too.” She smiled at me.

“Yeah, he is.” I sighed. Blaire’s voice rang loud in my head, reminding me that he’ll never actually be mine.

What was I thinking kissing him in the waiting room? Clearly my emotions are clouding my judgment.

Another knock on the door.

“Come in,” I called out.

The door slowly opened and a petite woman in her mid-fifties stood in the doorway, wringing her hands. I knew exactly who she was by her expressive eyes. Mom and I stood up as I reached down and smoothed out my t-shirt, suddenly panicked. I didn’t want to meet her like this. I had on sweats, a blood stained t-shirt, ugly hospital booties with rubber bottoms, and no makeup. I’m sure my face looked red and puffy, like the Kool-Aid man, from crying all day.

“You must be Kacie.” Emotion overcame her as she fought back tears. “I’m JoAnn Murphy.” She unexpectedly pulled me into a hug, which felt amazing. I gladly returned the embrace.

“It’s so nice to meet you. Brody has talked about you so much, I feel like I already know you.”

“I’m gonna step out so you guys can chat for a bit.” Mom smiled as she stood up and quickly made her way to the door.

“Here, sit down.” I turned and sat on the couch while she pulled up the chair across from me. “I’m sorry about how I look. Probably not a very good first impression.”

Reaching out, she grabbed my hand in her own. “Kacie, you have been through more today than I’ve been through in twenty-seven years of being a parent. Trust me, I’m not judging your appearance.”

I liked her a
lot
. She was warm and friendly and immediately felt like a friend. “I feel bad that we’re meeting like this at all. I assumed our first meeting would be over lunch or dinner.” She paused for a minute and looked over at Piper. She swallowed, taking it all in. “How’s she doing?”

“Okay, they still have her sedated. Trying to let her brain heal a little before they bring her out.”

“Being a mom is tough, isn’t it?”

“Very.”

“There’s a saying … I don’t remember it exactly, but something about how having kids is like allowing your heart to walk around outside of your body. It’s so true.” She shook her head in amazement.

“Absolutely,” I said, staring at Piper, looking for any small movement. “Except right now, I don’t feel like my heart is beating at all, it’s inactive. It won’t beat again until she’s awake and smiling at me.”

She reached over and squeezed my hand.

“Oh, I almost forgot-” she paused and dug for something in her purse. She pulled out a plastic bag and handed it to me.

“Thanks,” I said, confused.

“Brody got them in the gift shop, asked me to give them to you.”

I peeked into the bag, breaking out into a huge grin when I saw the light blue fluffy hospital slippers.

“He tried to find you flip flops, but this is all they had.”

Brody’s constant fuss to take care of me made me feel something I’d never really felt before … special. Most girls swoon over things like diamonds and fancy cars. For me, all it took was shampoo and hospital slippers.

“He’s very sweet. You’ve raised a great man.” I smiled at her.

“He
is
a great guy, I agree, but this new side of him, this attentive side is something I think was brought on entirely by you.”

My head snapped up at her. “Me?”

“Kacie, he talks about you and the girls constantly. I know I just met you, but I feel like I already know you. You’ve made such an impact on him in such a short period of time. It’s remarkable. You’ve changed his life.”

I’d cried so much today that I didn’t think my body was capable of making more tears, but there they were, threatening to fall again. “He’s changed mine too,” I said, staring down at the slippers through my blurred vision.

“Knock, knock.” Brody pushed the door open slightly. “Can I come in?”

JoAnn smiled at her son and waved him in. “Of course, honey.”

He walked across the room and sat down on the couch next to me, resting his arm along the top. I could tell he was giving me space and waiting for me to give him the okay, but that wasn’t gonna happen.

He stared straight at Piper, clenching his jaw. “How is she?”

“She’s okay, still sedated.”

His head turned and his eyes bore into mine. “They still have her sedated?”

“Yeah,” I nodded slowly, “it’s normal though, don’t worry. They’re just giving her brain a break.”

“How about you? Do you need a break?”

“Me?” My eyebrows shot up. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Kacie, you’ve barely left the room since we got here this morning and it’s almost dinnertime. When was the last time you ate, got some fresh air?”

I stared at Piper; the thought of leaving her like this was too painful. “I can’t leave her, not yet.”

“Kacie? If I may, honey, you said yourself, they have her sedated … why don’t you go get something to eat and step out for a bit? Might do you some good. I’ll stay here with her until you guys get back.” JoAnn’s lips curled slightly into a tight, reassuring smile.

Brody stood and held his hand out to me.

I was too tired to argue.

“I’ll just be gone a few minutes,” I said to JoAnn who stood to hug me again on our way out.

“No problem, honey. Take your time.”

Brody and I started toward the waiting room when I froze.

“Wait.” I looked down at my blood stained t-shirt. “Is there another way down to the gift shop? I don’t want Lucy to see me like this.”

“We’ll find one.” He pulled me the other direction.

We weaved our way left and right through empty, white hallways until we finally found the lobby.

“Thanks.” I smiled up at him and gently tried to pull my hand back, but he squeezed me tighter.

“Don’t.”

I wanted more than anything to wrap my arms around him and just be, but he wasn’t mine, he never would be, and holding his hand just made things harder.

I sighed. “Brody-”

“Not today.” He cut me off. “We’re going to talk soon, but not today. Today I need to hold your hand as bad as you need to hold mine, so just don’t.”

A few minutes later, we walked out of the gift shop and headed toward the cafeteria. I was sporting a brand new light pink “World’s Greatest Aunt” t-shirt.

We didn’t talk, just shuffled hand in hand through the hallway. At that moment I was so drawn into myself, deep in thought about everything that had happened, Brody was my lifeline to the outside world. He apologized when I bumped into people as he led me to a table in the back of the cafeteria.

“Sit down, I’ll be right back.” He ordered gently.

I sat and quietly looked down at the wood laminate table fully aware that people were staring—either at Brody or the depressed girl he walked in with—and I was in no mood to return fake smiles.

He returned a short time later and sat across from me, setting down a turkey sandwich, a salad, a banana, chocolate pudding, a bag of Cheetos, a bottle of water and chocolate milk.

I frowned and looked up at him. “How hungry do you think I am?”

“I don’t know,” he shook his head, smiling slightly, “I just wanted to make sure you ate something.”

We were quiet while I ate, but it felt like a big, white elephant was sitting at the table with us. He said we weren’t going to talk today and I appreciated that. I didn’t think I could form a sentence that made sense, nor did I have the will to push him away again. I felt so weak that had he said one sweet thing to me, I would’ve caved and lost myself in his arms.

I nibbled at the turkey sandwich and ate half the banana while he devoured everything else. We threw away the garbage and walked back up to the waiting room in silence. I was so anxious to wrap my arms around Lucy; I was almost jogging. As soon as I saw her, I dropped to my knees as she threw her arms around my neck, knocking me back.

Trying hard to remain strong and upbeat, I couldn’t help the few tears that escaped. I sat cross-legged on the hospital waiting room floor with Lucy curled up in my lap for several minutes, just feeling her breathe and smelling her hair. I wanted to run in that room, scoop Piper up and hold her just like this.

“Mommy, when does Piper get to come home?”

The knot in my stomach grew. “I’m not sure, baby. We have to wait and see what the doctor’s say, okay?”

“Can I go see her?” she asked.

I looked up at Brody, whose eyes went wide as he shook his head back and forth slightly.

“Oh, baby. She’s resting right now, she can’t talk back to you.”

Her head snapped up to look at me, “I know, Mom, but I want to talk to
her
. Please?”

I never had a sibling so I would never understand that bond they had, and being twins only made that bond stronger.

“Okay,” I sighed, “come on.”

“Is that really a good idea?” Brody asked nervously.

I shrugged, “I have no idea.”

We walked through the automatic doors as I silently prayed for a nurse to stop us and say that Lucy wasn’t allowed in. No one did, they just gave us sympathetic smiles as we walked by. We got to Piper’s room, and Lucy reached up and held my hand, squeezing it tightly.

“You’re sure you want to go in here?”

She nodded and Brody put his hand on her shoulder.

I pushed the door open and watched Lucy’s face closely as she took in her surroundings. Her brown eyes were wide as they darted around the room, finally settling on her sister. My mom and JoAnn stopped talking and stared at Lucy.

Lucy looked up at me. “Can she hear me?”

“Yep, but she can’t answer you. Wanna sit next to her?”

She nodded again as I lifted her up onto the foot of the bed next to Piper. Her eyes inspected every inch of her sister, from the IV to the dried blood in her hair.

“Does that hurt?” She pointed to the IV.

“Nope.” I tucked a piece of her blonde hair behind her tiny ear.

This time she pointed to the oxygen mask on Piper’s face, “Does that hurt?”

“Not at all.”

“I bet
those
hurt.” She stretched, trying to see the staples in Piper’s head.

“Those probably would have hurt, but she was asleep when they put them in, so she didn’t feel it. Her head will probably be sore when she wakes up though.”

Lucy paused, “Is she gonna wake up?”

Her question sent me into a tailspin. My chest grew tight and I couldn’t breathe, The room felt like it was spinning so fast, I couldn’t focus my eyes on any one thing.