Rosie Goes to War (20 page)

‘If you like.'

I make a pot of tea, all the time dreaming about chocolate chip cookies. It's so hard, doing so much manual work whilst living on rations. There's never enough to eat, and I'm getting totally sick of the stodgy, flavourless meals we've had. What I wouldn't give for a pizza, or a curry! Even some herbs or garlic would make a huge difference, but the only flavourings we have are salt, pepper or vinegar. Even pepper isn't the same as at home – it's ground into a grey powder and isn't anything like the fancy peppercorns my mum uses.

I've never been fat, but I'm noticing that my clothes are getting looser. At this rate, I'll end up looking like an anorexic if I don't get home soon.

I'm just pouring the tea when there's a knock at the door. Nelly is up to her armpits in washing, so I go to answer it. It's Bill.

‘Hiya,' I smile. ‘Come in. I've just made some tea. Do you want a cup?'

‘Er, hallo,' he said. ‘I've just taken Nan to the station. She thought you girls might like some of this veg. We had a good year on the allotment, so there's plenty of spuds and onions left over. There's a few carrots in there n'all, and sprouts, and some turnips. But what with all this cold, she don't think they'll last much longer. We thought it was better to share it with the neighbours than let it go rotten in the frost.'

He holds out a sack, bulging with vegetables. I feel tears well up. Extra food! Oh, bliss! My mouth waters as I step back.

‘Bill, that's so kind. Come in, come in. Wait till Nelly sees this lot. She'll be made up.'

He looks at me a bit odd, then shakes his head and comes in. He wipes his feet on the mat and steps into the hall. He looks at the coat stand. ‘It don't look like magic to me,' he says quietly. ‘You sure it had something to do with – you know?'

‘I haven't a clue. If I did I'd have gone back the way I came.' I pull a face in the mirror. ‘It doesn't explain the portal in that basement, does it? I just don't know anymore, Bill.' I shrug. ‘Anyway, don't mention it around Nelly, OK?'

He nods. ‘Is May not around, then?'

‘No, she's out. But if you stay for a cuppa, she might be home soon.'

‘Oh. All right. Just a quick one.'

Nelly greets him politely and thanks him for the food. Then she pulls me to one side and hisses, ‘Take him in the parlour, for God's sake. I don't want him watching while I wash me smalls!'

‘Oh, right. Sorry,' I say, trying not to laugh. ‘Come on, Bill, we'll take ours in the parlour.'

‘Put the paraffin heater on in there, it'll be quicker than lighting the fire to warm it up, or you'll catch your deaths,' Nelly calls after us.

It's easier said than done. I've never lit one before, and in the end Bill takes pity on me – either that or he's fed up with standing there shivering – and shows me how to do it.

Bill sits in an armchair and I take the sofa. I hope the heater warms us up soon.

‘Thanks,' I smile. ‘I'm pretty useless around here. I think I just used about a month's worth of soap flakes on my washing, and I nearly singed my eyebrows off the other day, trying to light the grill on the cooker.'

Bill laughs. ‘I'll bet Nell's been putting you right.'

I roll my eyes. ‘She's worse than my mum sometimes.' I suddenly feel really homesick. All things considered, Mum's not so bad. I wonder if I'll ever get the chance to tell her.

We sip our tea. The only sounds in the room are the hiss of the heater and the tick-tock of the clock on the mantelpiece. Bill looks at the clock and frowns. When he sees me looking me gives me an awkward grin.

‘What's the matter?'

‘I ain't got long. I'm on duty later on.'

‘You're a private, aren't you?'

‘Yeah, I've just heard I'm getting me corporal's stripes next week.'

‘Cool. We'll have to salute you from now on, Corporal Bill!'

‘Too right,' he grins.

‘Will you be sent overseas?' I ask.

He does that eyebrow thing. ‘Don't you know?'

‘I don't know everything, Bill. And if I did, I don't think I should tell you.'

‘Yeah, I know. Spoilers. Nan told me. You talked to her about all this, didn't you?'

‘Er, not exactly. She talked to me.'

‘How come?'

‘Seriously, I've no idea. She said loads of strange things about me being younger, and I'd been a teacher and got locked up and all sorts of stuff. To be honest, Bill, she scared me. From what she said it looks like I might be time-travelling for ever. But she said I told her she had to tell me it's going to be all right. I've just got to use my head, if that makes any sense? But I don't understand. I mean, how does she know? I just want to go home –'

‘Hang on a minute, Rosie. Calm down, love.' Bill gets up and comes across and kneels in front of me. ‘You're getting yourself in a state.' I take a deep breath, trying to calm down. ‘Now, I've got no idea what you're talking about half the time, but if Nan says it will be all right, and if she heard it from you another time, then I reckon you'd better listen.'

‘The girls think Lil's mad.'

‘Yeah, well, there's a lot of folks who say that. I've thought it meself a time or two. But you know what? I believe what you told me – about you coming from the future – and if Nan says she's seen you in the past, well, that sort of makes sense n'all in the circumstances, don't it?'

‘I suppose so, but she's gone away now, hasn't she? I can't ask her any more about it. What if –'

He puts a finger to my lips, shutting me up. ‘Ain't no point in what if, Rosie. It's like this war. There ain't no point in wanting it to be different. It's here and we've got to sort it out, 'cause if we don't, we'll all be talking German soon. Now, I thought about what you said about spoilers and the like, and I agree with you. It's best not to know, 'cause then you do what you can and don't take nothing for granted.'

My throat is tight and my eyes fill up with tears. ‘But what if you do know something – something really, really terrible. Shouldn't you try to change that?'

Bill looks at me. He has no idea what I'm talking about. He hasn't seen the pictures of the Holocaust survivors, so thin and afraid; or the ovens and the piles of shoes and – Oh God! I rub my eyes, trying to clear my tears and the images in my brain at the same time. Bill sits on the sofa next to me and pulls me into his arms.

‘Hey, it's all right. Don't fret, come on. You'll make yourself ill.'

‘Oh God, I don't know what to do.'

‘Maybe you'd better leave it to God, then. I don't reckon there's much else you can do.'

‘Do you believe in God?'

‘I thought I did. But these days? Who knows? I like to think he's out there somewhere and he's on our side. 'Cause if he ain't, what's the point?'

‘I can't help wondering if God is having a huge joke at my expense, sending me here to teach me a lesson. I know I've been horrible to Mum and Dad sometimes, and I've been disrespectful to Gran, but I'm not nearly as bad as some of my friends. I'm quite a good girl really. I mean, I don't smoke or do drugs and I haven't done more than snog a couple of boys. Why would God do this to me? Maybe he does want me to change things. Maybe I have to tell everyone so that it doesn't happen. But if I do, what will happen to the future? I might be like Marty McFly and end up going back to a different future, and I'll have a horrible step-dad and everything will be terrible and –'

‘Rosie, stop it. I don't have a clue who this Marty bloke is, but you've got to calm down.'

I squeeze my eyes shut and take a deep breath. ‘You're right. I'm being stupid.' Tears well up again. ‘It's just really, really hard, and it's so cold and I'm always hungry and frightened, and I just want to go home.'

‘Hush now.' He holds me tight and lets me cry for a bit more, then he starts to talk softly. ‘You know, I ain't never met a girl like you. I don't know anyone who would have climbed down that hole in your pretty dress to get that woman out. Not even Nelly or May.'

I hiccup and can't help a little giggle. ‘Nelly would have stood there and shouted to the woman to sort herself out. I'm not sure about May. She's really kind. I think she'd have tried. Actually, I think Nelly would have too. When something has to be done, she gets on with it, even if she doesn't like it. Look how she's put up with me. I'm useless, but she won't let me give up till I've got it right.' I hold up my hands, which are red and dried out from the washing. ‘Look at the state of my hands – I don't think I've ever worked so hard in my life. My Mum would have given up and done it for me.'

‘What's she like, your Mum?' He asks. I hesitate. ‘I ain't asking for spoilers, Rosie. I'm just curious. From what you say, she's going to be my daughter-in-law. It'll be nice to have a bit of advance knowledge when my boy starts bringing home girlfriends.' He laughs. ‘Hark at me! I ain't even got a girlfriend meself yet, and I'm talking about me son's sweethearts.'

I smile. ‘I'm glad you believe me.'

‘Well, why not? I've always had a soft spot for May. If you reckon we're going to get hitched, that's all right by me. It'd be nice to get some sign that May's interested, mind. She always treats me like a mate. I don't think she fancies me at all.'

I shrug. ‘Well, she will, I'm sure. Gran always –' I stop talking. I was going to say that she always talks about how much she loved him and he loved her. But if I say that, he'll realise that in my time he's dead. I look up at his young face, he's waiting for me to go on, but there's a great big lump in my throat. I wish he hadn't died so I could have known him then. I shake my head. ‘Spoilers,' I say, feeling like a fraud.

He nods and sighs. ‘Yeah, I know. But can't you give me a clue as to how I'm going to get May to go out with me?'

‘Have you asked her?'

‘Ain't much point. I've seen her flirting with fellas she fancies. She ain't never done that with me.'

Mmm. I remember May's reaction when I said Bill was fit. She was really surprised. ‘Let me think about it,' I say. But I really don't have any idea. I rest my head on his shoulder and we sit in the quiet, cuddling up on the sofa. It's not like I'm an expert on dating – I've been hanging around waiting for Simon to notice me, and it's been completely pointless because he's a muppet who doesn't know a good thing when it's right there under his nose. Not that I want him to notice me now, not after he snogged Jess. And as for Jess – no, I won't think about that now. But … maybe there is something … ‘Has she ever seen you with another girl?' I ask.

‘Only girls I've danced with at the Palais. She's never taken no notice.'

‘But she's never thought you were serious about any of them?'

‘No, 'cause I haven't been. We just dance and chat, that's all. I don't play around. I ain't bleeding Harry.'

I wave a hand. ‘Seriously, I don't know what she sees in him.'

‘Too right.' Bill looks at the clock on the mantelpiece. ‘I'd better go.'

I'm really reluctant to let him go. I feel so safe and warm. I sit up, untangling my arms and he stands up. He holds out a hand and pulls me up. We're standing close together and Bill is kissing me on the cheek when May walks into the parlour.

‘Oh! Sorry, Nell said …' May looks embarrassed.

‘Hello, May. We didn't hear the front door,' says Bill, going a bit pink.

She stares at Bill like she's never seen him before. Interesting! I slip my arm around his waist and he automatically puts his arm round my shoulder. Her eyes follow my movement and she frowns slightly before pasting a smile on her face. ‘No, I don't suppose you did. Nell's put the kettle on. Do you want another cuppa?'

‘Not for me thanks, I'm off.'

‘Oh. All right. See you around, Jock.'

‘It's Bill,' I say. Bill squeezes my shoulder.

‘But he's always been Jock.'

‘It doesn't mean he likes it,' I say.

May looks confused. I don't think it's ever occurred to her that people don't like nicknames.

‘It's all right, May. You ain't the only one, everyone does it. But if you could see your way to calling me Bill, well, I'd appreciate it.'

‘Well, I'll try to remember,' she says. ‘But it'll be hard after all these years.'

I have an idea. ‘Why don't you imagine you've never met him before? Here,' I grab his hand and pull him towards May. ‘May, let me introduce my friend Bill. May, Bill, Bill, May.' They both look at me like I'm mad. ‘Now you shake hands and say how do you do, OK?'

Bill and May look at each other and burst out laughing.

‘Why not?' says May and holds out her hand. Bill takes it in both of his big, capable hands. ‘Hello Bill, nice to meet you.'

‘Yeah, nice to meet you too, May.'

I'm so pleased with myself as they smile at each other, I want to run round them cheering.

When Bill turns to leave, I fling my arms around him and give him a kiss on the cheek. He laughs and swings me up in the air and as he puts me back on my feet he kisses my forehead. ‘Thanks,' he whispers before he lets me go and with a cheerful wave to May he walks out the door.

May is standing there looking at me with a frown on her face. ‘So, you and J– Bill. Are you courting?'

I'm about to deny it, but change my mind. ‘We might be,' I say. ‘Why? You've got Harry, haven't you? Did you want Bill for Nelly?'

‘No! Not Nelly and Jock, I mean Bill. He ain't her sort. She likes posh boys.'

‘So what's the problem.'

May shrugs. ‘Nothing. It's just … Jock? I ain't never thought …'