Safe Love (Love Brothers #4) (3 page)

“I’m glad you were here.”

She stopped, keeping her gaze trained on the house he’d been
gifted by Crystal’s aggravated but resigned parents as soon as she’d dropped
‘I’m pregnant’ bomb on them. Antony could sense Margot’s tension as if it were
his own but he didn’t let go. Finally, she pulled out of his grip. Despite his
sincere efforts not to, he lifted his gaze to hers, drawn as if by magnets or
the power of her personality, as he was coming to understand.

“I’ll expect you at our next scheduled day, after AliceLynn
and I have an hour together.”

He nodded, attempting to form words as he noted the odd
sensation of hollowness in his chest that seemed to ease upward into his brain,
causing a sort of whiteout—not something he’d ever think would be pleasant. But
it was in a very alarming way. The kind of alarming way that made him have to
readjust his shorts, clear his throat and look away from her.

To his utter horror, she leaned down to his ear, sending a
shiver down his spine. His dick got even harder, if that were physiologically
possible. Sounds from inside the house faded as he attempted to hang onto them,
especially that of Rosie’s voice, to anchor him to earth. But all he knew at
that precise moment was Margot’s lips nearly touching his neck and her breath
on his skin as she said, “It’s all right, Antony.” Her fingers brushed his arm
and then she was gone, leaving him a shivering, teeth chattering mess and so
revved up he seriously pondered running into the house, kicking everyone out
and dragging Rosie to the bedroom.

But that wasn’t what he required right then and he damn well
knew it. The fact of
that
matter made him furious with himself and with
Margot. What the hell she thought she was doing escaped him but he wouldn’t put
up it with it, or buy into it, or even
want
it. He was engaged to a
wonderful, lovely, caring woman he’d known nearly his whole life. He didn’t
need anything …else.

Slamming his next beer, calling on his grown-up powers of
self-control, he forced his body to a parade rest and got to his feet. There
was more work to be done and the soft, quiet place in his head he’d inhabited
all day as he did it had been so very comforting.

It wasn’t until much later that night, alone and sipping a
final beer on the patio did he realize that the quiet space had consumed him
for the bulk of the afternoon, and all it took was the sound of Margot’s voice
and the sensation of her body near his to send him there.

Margot set her laptop aside, vowing to finish all the
insurance filing crap later and took a long, deep breath. The grandfather clock
bonged, reminding her that she had fifteen minutes until her next
appointment—one with Antony’s challenging daughter, and one she felt utterly
unprepared for in a way that reminded her of the days she’d allowed herself to
sink into an obsession with her ex-husband.

Getting to her feet, she forced all that out of her head,
determined to give AliceLynn the attention she deserved. Margot was known for
her ‘expertise’ with teenagers, which amused her since each one of them truly
believed they were the ‘only ones’ with such special issues. Bless them but
they were all selfish creatures, which was nothing but pure evolution at work.
Sometimes she did come up against one with a harder shell to crack and
something told her after just one session with the girl, she’d be having a
tough time getting AliceLynn to open up.

Never mind her father.

The thought of Antony sent a bolt of forbidden, scary lust
down Margot’s spine. She cursed, stomped her foot and closed the blinds so she
could pray and do a few calming yoga poses in private. By the time the knock
came, signaling AliceLynn’s arrival, she felt a bit more settled and ready.

“Hey,” the girl said when Margot opened the door with a
smile.

A solid forty-five minutes of frustrating, one-sided talk
later, Margot took another deep breath, determined not to let on how aggravated
she was. She’d worked with kids way tougher than this. There was no reason to
allow anger into her emotional stew, even though she knew why it was happening.
Some sort of an inappropriate bond had been formed, both with Antony and his
daughter. Hence she was getting a ‘too close to the situation’ sensation about
AliceLynn. She might even call it ‘parental,’ were she inclined to think such
nonsense about a client.

“Okay, well, it’s about time for your father to get here.”
Margot glanced at the clock, ignoring the way her scalp prickled in
anticipation of seeing Antony.

“That’s my signal to leave,” AliceLynn stated, getting to
her feet and adjusting the straps of her too small tank top. Margot shook her
head at herself. Since when did she pass judgment on a girl’s clothing choice?

“I want you to stay, just for a few minutes if you would.
Please.”

The girl made an unpleasant sound somewhere between a laugh
and a snort of derision. “Trust me, my daddy wouldn’t want that.”

“Your daddy—your father—does want that as a matter of fact.”

“Oh?” AliceLynn drew her arms in close as her lips turned
down into a frown. “He hasn’t wanted me for going on thirteen years now. Why
would he all of a sudden need me here, in this office with you?”

Margot blinked, unsure how to answer that. She didn’t know
if Antony wanted it and was completely perplexed at herself for even saying
such a thing. While the therapist in her knew it was too early to put them
together for a session, the woman in her must be using the poor, angry,
confused teenager as some sort of a shield.

“You’ve moved in with him, right?” She deflected, trying to
gather her thoughts.

“Yeah,” AliceLynn grunted out, as she pulled Chap Stick from
her purse and applied it with a shaking hand. Something about the obvious
tremble in the girl’s fingers nearly broke Margot’s heart. “So?”

“So, how is it? Being home again?”

“It’s not my home. I’m just stuck there a while I guess,
until I can find something else.”

“Until you go away to college you mean,” Margot prodded,
thinking that if it took her over into Antony’s hour to get the girl to
actually talk, she’d use it.

“I have a job already, waiting tables at my Granddaddy’s
pub. And my boyfriend is…”

Margot held up a hand, and even as the words came pouring
out of her mouth she wished them back. “Young lady, you are going to college. I
know you have straight A’s even though you’ve been skipping. Are you studying
for your ACT? And what boy is…”

AliceLynn’s eyes narrowed. “You know, Miz Hamilton, if I
didn’t know better, I’d say you sounded an awful lot like my mama. And I
promise you, you are not that. I’m getting a step-mama soon and she won’t be
the boss of me either. None of you will be. The only mama I know is my Grammie
Lindsay and I guess she’s busy dyin’ or something.” She swiped at her face.
“Anyway, I’m done with this.”

Margot watched as the girl stumbled over her own feet in her
haste to get out of the office. She was frozen in place, horrified at herself
and acknowledged that she did, indeed, sound like the girl’s mother.

She sat and put a hand over her eyes, wondering what in the
hell she’d managed to get herself into. One thing she and her ex had agreed
upon was that the ‘no kids’ rule was sacred. There were too many humans in the
world already. They had no business adding to the population. If they got the
urge to parent someone, they’d adopt. End of story.

Bastard had that girlfriend of his knocked up by the time
he’d broken the news to Margot.

A sharp rap on the door made her jump. “Come in,” she said,
not looking up at the sound of Antony’s low, growly voice.

“Hi,” he said. “So…I’m here. Now what?”

Margot believed she could hear the ligaments in her neck
creak as she looked up at him. She swallowed, smiled and stood, deciding to
just go with her gut and see where it took her. She’d never been cautious but
getting dumped by the one man she’d allowed herself to love made her hesitate.
It would be all right. Antony was engaged, and to a lovely woman who did not
deserve to be treated this way.

“Sit,” she said, pointing to the chair near her window.

He shrugged and did as she said, slumping down and crossing
one ankle over the opposite knee and hooking his hands behind his head,
striking a classic male pose of defiance. Confidence surged through her once
she realized he was already taking on a role she wanted him to—one she would
need to break down in order to help him, whether he realized it or not. The problem
was, her sort of ‘breaking down’ usually ended with sexual intercourse, and she
couldn’t allow that. It would be wrong.

She slid one of her desk drawers open and put her hands on
something she’d placed there, almost without thinking, after his last, awkward
visit. The silky fabric slipped through her fingers. Antony frowned at the
sight of it in her hand, his posture shifting ever so slightly from defiance
into fear. She could almost see it shimmering off him and it made her feel
powerful, yet sad at the same time.

“I’m going to try a little experiment with you.” She came
around the side of the desk and headed to him, just as he jumped to his feet.
“Sit down, Antony,” she said, using her best ‘take no shit’ voice as she
invaded his personal space with the blindfold in one hand. “It will be all
right, I promise.”

He shook his head but sat, leaving her standing over him,
which gave her a shiver of anticipation that she promptly quelled. His strong
arms hung loose at his sides, his jeans clad legs sprawled out, too long for
the chair. She stood behind him and placed the black silk blindfold over his
eyes. After tying it in a way she knew would be nearly impossible to release,
she placed her palms on his broad shoulders. As she had hoped, his thrumming,
nervous energy calmed under her touch.

Too easy
, she thought.

Not good,
she also thought, tamping down the extreme
urge to lean over him and lick her way up his neck.

Instead, she spoke into the air over his head. “Now, tell me
one thing you miss about Crystal.”

“Uh…” he said, clenching and unclenching his fingers.
“It’s…um… been such a long time and I…”

“One thing Antony, quick, without thinking too hard.”

He took a long, shuddering breath. “Her lips.”

“Okay, now another thing.” She kept her hands pressed on his
shoulders, willing him to be calm and to open up to her.

“Her ass,” he ground out. She smiled.

“Now we’re getting somewhere. One more thing please.”

“Her…” He sucked in a breath. “The way she’d be in charge.”

“Hmm…” Margot said, willing herself to stay put, to not
place herself in front of him and do what she really wanted. “And what do you
mean by that? She balanced the checkbook?”

“No,” he whispered.

“Okay then. Where was she in charge?” She caught herself
even as she said it, implying that Antony’s wife had been “in charge” in a
specific place. It cut to the chase, so why not?

“I’m, um…not really comfortable with this.” His leg was
jittering up and down as tension rose in him again. Margot took a deep breath,
cursing her body for betraying her. She squared her shoulders.

“I know. That’s why we’re not looking at each other.” Unable
to stop herself, she leaned down and put her lips near his ear, sucking in a
huge breath of leather, a hint of smoke, cotton and a clean, soapiness that
made her want to weep. “It’s all right. I’m in charge in this room so you can
just…relax.”

She saw him grit his teeth and knew he was trying hard to do
the exact opposite of what she was telling him to, so she tightened her grip on
his shoulders, not an easy feat considering how firm they were. A point had to
be made and she knew her options for making it were limited, since she’d
promised herself that this would be nothing more than a therapy method.

“The bedroom,” he said, so low she barely heard him.
“Crystal was in charge in our bedroom, in private. It was…something we…liked.”
Margot straightened, smiling but shaking at the same time, even more confused
about how to proceed. Keeping her hands on him, knowing he required at least
that much from her, she got herself under some modicum of control and plowed
forward.

“How was she in charge?”

“Oh, I’m pretty sure you know,” he said, surprising her with
the sudden strength in his voice. “And I’m also pretty sure I’ve told you
enough.” He jumped up, ripped off her un-rip-able blindfold, sending it
fluttering to the floor in two strips of black fabric and kicked the chair out
of the way. She stumbled, blinking fast, brain spinning and body going into
overdrive at the look on his face. He was begging her now, using his
unconscious body language, but she could not—she would not—give into the urge
to shove him to his knees.

Her butt hit the bookshelf, making her stumble and curse.
Antony stopped, looming over her and sending out the sort of obvious vibe she’d
spent years coming to terms with and assuming she understood—until recently.

“Step away from me,” she said. “This isn’t what you think.”

He frowned and got even closer, pissing her off and making
her inner self rise up and take over. She put her hands on his impossibly firm
chest and shoved, forcing him to move out of her personal space so she could
breathe and process how quickly she’d lost control of the situation.
Typical
,
she thought with a shudder of disgust.
No wonder Gavin left you. You’ve
gotten weak.

Antony bent down and picked up the pieces of the blindfold.
When he held them in his outstretched hands, his expression did nothing to
dispel her dismay. “Sorry about this,” he said.

She grabbed them, her heart pounding way too fast. “Get
out,” she whispered. “Just go. I’m sorry. I can’t…do this.”

“You’re the only one I’ve ever told…about Crystal and me and
what we…you know, liked.”

She willed away the girlie tears. “I know,” she said. “It’s
not something you’d share with your brothers.”

Antony chuckled and ran a hand around the back of his neck,
breaking the tension in the room enough for her to breathe again. “I, um, I’m
engaged. And I love her, Rosie, and her boy.” He dropped his gaze to the
carpet. Without thinking, Margot tilted his face up, ignoring that strange
electrical charge that snapped between them. “It took me nearly four years to
even kiss her, Rosie. And we only just… um…” A charming blush rose from his
neck to his face, making Margot faint with lust. “I don’t know why in the hell
I’m telling you this.”

She kept his dimpled chin between her thumb and forefinger,
studying his face and willing him to keep talking. His shoulders slumped and
the light that had been sparkling in his eyes went out.

“Rosie’s husband Paul was my friend, since birth I think.
Our parents were all young, too young, but latched onto each other because they
were all poor as dirt, trying to get businesses started, with no support from
their families. We were always together, and once Kieran made his appearance
the three of us were inseparable.”

Margot took a step away from him, watching as the man told
his story, realizing that she should get him into a chair and get them both a
glass of water to dispel some of the inappropriate tension. But she didn’t want
to, no matter how much she liked Rosie.

Lindsay had filled her in on this part of Antony’s
story—Paul’s tragic death, Rosie’s pregnancy, and how Antony had stepped in as
caretaker which had, it seemed, finally lead to something emotionally permanent
between them.

Antony tucked his hands into his jeans pockets. “Once Rosie
and Paul started dating, the summer between our sophomore and junior years in
high school, I remember being jealous of him but I was pretty busy…fucking
every female in my immediate vicinity.” He shrugged. “I paid for abortions for
two different girls that year. There, that’s another thing I’ve never told
anyone else. You sure are gettin’ an earful today.”

She nodded as she kept her silence, realizing he was on a
proverbial roll and if she spoke it would break it up and she wanted to know
everything she could about him, in a wholly selfish way.

“So, uh, well, Crystal was one of those girls. With the
abortion I mean.”

Margot blinked. She had not expected that. Lindsay had told
her Antony was wild from the get-go but once it had become clear that he’d be
the oldest of a passel of Love kids he had calmed somewhat, taking on the role
of being the oldest in a pretty serious way, at least at home. But as his
mother, she was fully aware of what he got up to with numerous girls, beer, and
pot. Until Dominic came along, she’d believed Antony would be the first one to
do jail time, or to get shot by some girl’s angry father.