Authors: Sophie Lira
“Darlin’, slow down, you’re going to chop off a finger. I’ve had my fill of hospitals the past few weeks. I don’t want to be going back again for you.” Taking the knife from her small hand, I continue to cut up some green bell peppers and red onions. She furiously rolls out three balls of pizza dough on the counter next to me.
“It’s getting late,” she reiterates, scooping marinara sauce, followed by manic shakes of various spices. “Your parents will be here soon.”
“Whoa, it’s okay.” A deep breath pierces the silence and I put down the knife and turn toward her. Tears plop into the splattered marinara and her faltering hand grips the sauce ladle with white knuckles. “Oh, darlin’… come here.”
“I finally got ahold of Tyler,” she sobs, waves of tears rushing down her neck and onto her chest. Her flour-and sauce-coated hands grip my shirt as she sinks to the kitchen floor, her body ice in her thin tank top and leggings. “I was going to fly out and see him. He doesn’t want me to
bother him with my bullshit
.”
Oh, it’s definitely going to be Kick-a-Ginger day.
Tag team style.
Cam can go first.
“Ba—” I stop myself, knowing she hates that term of endearment. “Darlin’, he hasn’t exactly been a good brother to you the past few years.”
Dale jumps up and licks her face as she hiccups another sob. His growing body shakes as he comforts her, and between the two of them, my legs are going numb. But he’s her security blanket and I know that. So as she crushes him against her chest, I don’t say anything.
“I know. But he’s still my brother! I don’t know why he’s being like this. I want this anxiety and apprehension to be gone.”
“It’s not going to go away overnight and you are getting through it. Just occupy yourself with other things.” I sigh, leaning my head against the huge, fluffy bun on the crown of her head. “Such as cooking. Why don’t we put on your favorite album, open a bottle of wine, and I’ll help you finish dinner? And I’ll give you a massage and we can watch a movie after my parents leave?”
“I still don’t know what I’d do without you.” The fine grit of flour rubs against my cheek as she takes my face in her palm. “And you can only give me a massage if it comes with a happy ending.”
Rolling my eyes, I smile and hold her close. “I’ll see what I can do.”
Dale jumps up and licks my face, trying to score some floury leftovers. I finally push him away and I really can’t wait to see what new information my dad obtained. I’m starting to get sick of this. All I fucking want is a week where I can love the hell out of my girlfriend and be uninterrupted by legal bullshit. Or anyone’s bullshit. The churning I’ve had in my stomach all day has to be a sign that this breakdown might be the best part of my day.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Surf’s Up
Olivia
Ollie, I have a ton on my plate.
I won’t have any time to see you.
Don’t waste your money on coming out.
June runs her fingers through my long strands of hair. Dale lies next to me, his head hanging off the side of the couch. I hold him as close as I can. I’m not crying, but I feel empty. The fullness Kyle, Dale, and his parents provide isn’t filling my heart.
Tyler has continuously let me down and I shouldn’t be this upset about it. Kyle, his parents, and Cam have helped brighten my dreary world with bursts of color. I know I’ll always miss him, though. I don’t have it in me to totally cut him out.
I’m really busy at work and trying to secure my second internship.
“Honey, I hope you know you can talk to me if you need advice.” Her hand runs through my hair again.
Don’t. Come. To. LA.
I look up from the pillow perched against her leg and sigh. “I know. It’s just … there’s something Tyler is holding back. I can feel it.”
“Have you thought about going to go see him whether he likes it or not?” She nudges me and I scoop Dale into my lap. As I slide upright, he huffs another sigh.
I shake my head. “Yeah, I guess, but … ”
“No buts. Just do it, sweetheart.” She takes my hand, giving it a squeeze.
“June, I can’t. It’s not in the cards. I thought if I brought it up he’d be excited and I’d figure it out.” I slump into the cushions and shake my head. It’s not rocket science for her to know I’m superbly monetarily challenged. I’ve never been to California. I’ve never been out of a three-state radius. I glance at them and take a deep breath as Kyle sits next to me on the couch.
“I have a national firm meeting in Los Angeles next week.” Tim smiles as Dale hops off my lap and gallops over to him, sitting at his feet.
“The week of Thanksgiving?” I raise an eyebrow.
“The law doesn’t wait for convenience.” Tim laughs.
“Turkey sucks anyway. Mexican is so much better.” Kyle drapes an arm around me, pulling me into his side. “And I’m dying to go surfing again at Huntington Beach.”
“Not with your knee, you’re not.” June’s jaw clenches as she narrows her eyes.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” I shrug Kyle off and stand. “With all due respect … in the future, can you please talk to me about these things before you bring it up like it’s nothing?”
This must be what’s it like to have disposable income. I used to not be able to buy a pair of jeans without budgeting for a month and picking up an extra shift. Clothes, trips, extravagant dinners, oh my! Dale follows me as I pace and I rake my fingers through my hair. I know they mean well, but all of the counseling in the world won’t change how I think about some things.
“I don’t mean to sound disrespectful or rude. But this is just a lot for me.” I pick Dale up and smile as he licks my face. “What about work and … ”
“I used my miles to get your ticket. It really was no big deal.” Kyle stands and pulls me into a hug with Dale wedged between us. “You really think Helena, of all people, is going to give you shit?”
“Watch your mouth,” June sing-songs.
“You already booked my ticket?” I’m going to kill him. As much as I love Kyle, I’m going to kill him.
And I know you’re going to pay for everything.
“That’s a
HUGE
deal to me.”
“Liv, you wanted to see your brother again. In theory, this is your only option.” Kyle squeezes me again.
“I know Helena is like Mother Theresa, but I can’t keep taking off work,” I protest. “Do you know I’ve been off more than I’ve worked the past three months? It’s also not fair to Aubrey to pick up my slack. We had a deal, Kyle, when I moved here. You know how important it is for me to hold my own at least a little bit.”
Kyle holds me at arm’s length. “You know it’s not an issue.”
“There are some things I will never give into and supplementing my income with yours is one of them.” I force a smile, appreciating the offer, but this is going too far. I can’t fathom how people go looking for relationships with this kind of security. I couldn’t imagine using anyone for his bank account.
June tugs my hand and smiles. “Walk with me.”
Before I can say anything, she’s pulling me into Kyle’s room. “I’m sorry if I seem like I’m not appreciative.”
June laughs and sits on the corner of the bed, patting the space next to her. “Honey, I’d be hiding under the couch if I were you. I totally know where you’re coming from because I was you when I first met Tim. Kyle gets his intensity from his father. I know you’re trying, sweetheart. That’s why I brought you in here, so you can gather your thoughts.”
“Aside from my mini-freakout, how did you know?” I can’t help my shoulders as they fall. I swear, for every minuscule step I take forward, I leap five steps back.
“My instincts as a mother don’t begin and end with Kyle. I’ve bandaged up my fair share of scrapes over the years. Do you know how many baseball teams Kyle’s been on?” She gives my hand a quick squeeze. “My heart has been breaking for you since the moment Kyle told me about you. I know where you’ve been and I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.”
I don’t know how to respond because another wave of emotion is creeping up my throat. “June, I just don’t get why I should have to go to this great a length to see my brother.”
“Because he doesn’t have your heart.” She squeezes my hand as I rest my head on her shoulder. “I wouldn’t have suggested this if I didn’t think you deserved it. More importantly, you can handle it. And if something happens, I’ll fly Cam out to handle it.”
I laugh. “I’m assuming most of the scrapes were from him?”
“I’d give it a solid ninety-two percent.” Dale comes galloping in and June scoops him up. “But, sometimes he can parent Kyle better than Tim and me combined.”
“That doesn’t shock me.” Maybe I should go with it. But, ugh, work. And bills.
But I also miss the hell out of my shitty brother.
“Okay.” I nod and smile, even though my mind is racing. “Just please, in the future, please tell me about things like this before you do them. And let me talk to Helena and Aubrey about work.”
“I think I can make that happen.” June stands and I follow her back into the living room, where the empty seat next to Kyle beckons me.
***
Kyle rolls to a stop at a traffic light in Santa Monica. The rented black Jeep Wrangler is free and clear of anything resembling a roof and my hair glides through the breeze. I lean my head back against the seat and stare at the white clouds beneath the brilliant blue sky. Kyle takes my hand, giving it a squeeze.
“You doing okay?” He turns and plants a kiss on the side of my head. “You were a little freaked during landing.”
I nod and smile, craning my head to see the indigo water crashing along the shoreline. “I’m more than okay, this is beautiful. I’m trying to take it all in.”
“Just checking.” He adjusts his sunglasses and smiles.
My body is pleading with me to run to the pristine white beach. This is nothing like going to the beach in Louisiana. The Pacific makes the Gulf look like a bathtub that hasn’t been cleaned in a hundred years. He slows down and moves into the right lane before stopping in front of a massive white building lined with bright fuchsia umbrellas separated by full palm trees.
Holy. Crap.
“This is my favorite hotel,” Kyle says as the attendant opens his door. “I got it, sir.” He nods to my door and my cheeks heat.
I swallow and blanch as I take in my surroundings. I should have known that he would pick a place like this and not a Holiday Inn or something. I’m not even sure where his parents are staying for the conference, and I hope it’s not here. Last thing I need is them winding up next to us and pounding on the wall if we have a few late-night bouts of exercise.
Kyle helps me out of the car and I lean over the edge, reaching into the backseat to take my carry-on bag and purse. We walk hand in hand up the few white limestone steps and into the lobby. My gaze flows from one abstract sculpture to the next. Kyle walks ahead of me to the front desk and pulls out his wallet. I stop to admire a windblown tree branch sculpture imprinted with glossy shells and muted sea glass.
“Darlin’, come on!” Kyle calls from the reception desk a few minutes later and I’m jolted out of my admiration. “We’re done!”
“Okay!” I shuffle over, trying not to trip on the edge of my flowing white cotton skirt.
“You like it?” He pulls me close, rubbing his hand along my hip.
“This place is incredible.” My fingers trace the edge of the russet and white marble counter, dipping into the grooves of the waved design. Natasha would chain herself to this lobby for weeks drawing it all in meticulous detail.
“Here are your room keys. The ocean-view suite on the sixth floor was available.” The concierge slides a pamphlet toward us. “Have a wonderful stay.”
Suite. Right.
I smile, taking Kyle’s hand. We walk to the elevator cemented to each other’s side. The comfortable quiet between us relaxes me and helps soothe the apprehension coursing through my veins. I still can’t believe I’m doing this. I flew to Los Angeles on a ridiculous whim to talk to my brother. I’m staying in a bajillion-dollar-a-night hotel along the Pacific Coast Highway.
Three months ago I could barely afford ramen.
I’m not sure what I want to do first: nap, eat, go to the beach, or jump on Kyle and have dirty vacation sex. I shouldn’t even be thinking about it because it’s not why we’re here. But, damn, he looks amazing in his black cotton shorts, white V-neck, and canvas slip-ons that no man should wear, but he makes them look like haute couture.
Kyle slides the key into the door when we arrive at our room and I take a millisecond to level myself as he opens the door. My jaw drops. This is not a room. This is not a suite. It’s a damn apartment. There’s a kitchen bigger than my old studio and a California King bed draped with sheer linens between the four posts.
I float through the room and pull open the sliding door onto the balcony. The sun is dipping closer to the marbled azure water and the bustling of LA lies below us. In the distance, giant mountains cast shadows over the mansions in the hills. I grip the railing, a smile overcoming my face.
“This is going to go fine, Liv.” Kyle wraps his arms around my shoulders, pulling me close to him.
“I know.” Even if I’m lying through my teeth, the positivity I need is the only thing keeping me going. I want answers and a lot of them. Even if coming here is over the top and kind of crazy, he is my brother.
But first, I need my wonderful and supportive boyfriend to show me how much he really loves me. It might be the only dirty secret in the back of my mind to keep me sane through all of this chaos.
***
The decadent combination of saltwater, gardenias, jasmine, and hydrangeas pulls me from a heavenly sleep. I wouldn’t expect anything less from this palatial mini-estate I’m calling home for the next few days. I prop myself up on my elbows, clutching the soft beige sheet around my bare chest. Kyle lies next to me on his stomach, dead asleep, the sheet scarcely covering his ass.