Salvation (The Captive Series Book 4) (15 page)

  
He unhurriedly dipped a cloth into the water and ran it over her shoulders and down her back. She didn’t shy away from his touch, she wasn’t embarrassed by it like she had been when she’d first come to the palace. She drew her knees up against her chest, not to hide her nudity, but in a gesture of comfort as she wrapped her arms around her legs. She rested her cheek on her knee as she watched him. Unshed tears shimmered in her eyes as he rubbed the cloth over her lower back in small, soothing circles.

   “Aria…”

   “It’s ok, I’ll be ok. I just hurt.”

   “I know you do.”

   “Please don’t worry about me. I’ll get through this. I just need time. But time seems so long now, so… empty? Maybe not empty, but wrong somehow, and I don’t know how to explain it. There’s this hole inside me and all I want is for it to be filled again, but that’s impossible, and I have to learn to live with it because there are no other options. I have to figure out a way to patch the hole enough so that I can breathe again, without feeling as if the air is suffocating me.”

   His hand stilled on her back, it was the most she’d said to him in the past four days. “Tell me what to do to make it better.”

   She frowned, her hand slipped from her legs to entwine with his. “There is nothing you can
do
other than being here,” she murmured. “Time will help I suppose. I’ve heard it heals all wounds, but I don’t think this one will ever completely heal. How could it?” Tears slipped down her face, he wiped them away with the pad of his thumb. “You being here make’s it better, you being with me makes it better.
Together
. We won Braith and that is more than I’d dared to let myself hope for.”

    “We did.” And she’d been so immersed in her melancholy that she didn’t know she’d become a hero of sorts. Daniel had stepped forward to claim his father’s place, and William and Max had become his seconds in command, but Aria was the one everyone talked about, the one they whispered about in awe. The human that had helped take down the king, the ex-blood slave that the new king cherished. Even the vampires admired her, even more so than they had before.

   Her eyes closed as he washed her back, kneading her skin as he sought to ease the knots in her muscles. “I knew there was a good chance we would lose someone, I prepared myself for it. I know that we’re lucky even more weren’t lost, and lucky to be alive and free.”

   “But you still miss him.”

   “Yes.” Her misery was palpable in that one word. “I never got to say goodbye.” More tears slid down her cheeks, he didn’t brush these ones away; they were hers to shed. “I never had the chance to tell him I loved him again.”

   “He knew.”

   Her eyes appeared even brighter with the tears shimmering in them and the shadows outlining them. “I know that, but before we separated in the past we always said our goodbyes and exchanged our love. Caleb robbed me of that.”

   His hand stilled on her back, every muscle in his body froze. If his brother hadn’t already been dead, in that moment he gladly would have killed him a thousand times over. He waited, unable to tear his eyes from hers
as she finally spoke of his family. “I’m mad at myself for going into that town, but I’d do it again. That’s the person my father raised, it’s who I am.”

   “It is,” he agreed, still unable to bring himself to ask the questions lodged in his throat. He was desperate to know but terrified of the answers she would give him.

   “I’m sorry for your losses also,” she whispered.

   “I suffered no losses.”

   “I know you weren’t close with your father and brother, or Natasha, but they were still your family.”

   “
You
are my family. Jack and Melinda are my family, even Ashby has started to grow on me again, and somehow I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’ve begun to like your brothers.” A small smile flickered across her lips, her eyes lit with amusement as she actually chuckled. The sound of that small laugh warmed him and eased some of his fears.

   “That surprises me, with William especially.”

   “He is the more annoying of the two,” Braith agreed.

   Her smile widened as her fingers danced over his. “My father always said one of us would have been bad enough, but two of us were a sign that he was being punished for something in an ancestor’s past.”

   Now would be the time to tell her, but he found he couldn’t. Not when she was smiling again, not when there was actually happiness shimmering in her eyes instead of despair. Later, there would be time later; they finally
had
time for each other, with each other.

   “I’ll take the punishment,” he assured her.

   “I hope so.”

   “Hell, I’ll even take Max.”

   “I’ve noticed the two of you have been getting along better. I’m glad,” she murmured.

   “I’m glad you’re glad.”

   A sigh escaped her and the smile slipped away. “Would you tell me if you were bothered by the loss of your family?”

   “They were my blood, but I’m not sorry they’re dead. They were brutal creatures that never would have changed. If Caleb hadn’t taken my father down when he did, things may have been far different Aria. We may very well be dead. He was a powerful man, and would have been far fiercer competition than Caleb. Thousands upon thousands of lives will be better because of their deaths. Including
ours
.”

   He lifted her arm gently, hoping to distract her from her thoughts as he rubbed the cloth over her ribcage. He didn’t want her feeling any guilt over their deaths when he felt none. He was surprised to find her contemplating him when he placed the arm back down and took hold of her other one. “You must be hungry.”

   He shook his head. There was enough for her to deal with right now without having to worry about his needs too. “Gideon brought me some blood yesterday, I’m fine.”

   “It’s not as good.”

   He smiled wryly at her. “Nothing is as good as you.” He pressed a chaste kiss to the inside of her wrist, the one that was not as bruised and raw looking. He froze, his muscles bunched as he spotted her black-and-blue middle finger. Though the bone was healed, he knew exactly what had been done to it. It took everything he had not to bellow in rage, but that was the last thing she needed right now. “But it’s enough,” he managed to choke out.

   Her fingers stroked over his cheek before slipping under his chin to lift his head slightly. “I miss the bond it establishes between us.” 

   “As do I, but not until you’re better Aria.”

   She turned her hand over in his and clasped his fingers. “What they did to me Braith, you can see it all.”

   His hand clenched around the cloth, his shoulders stiffened as he froze. He’d tried not to think about the fact that they may have taken more than just her blood from her, tried not to think about the degradation she would have experienced. It made him wish they were both alive so he could draw out their deaths in ways that even his father hadn’t imagined possible. He’d love her no matter what; take her anyway that he could get her. No matter how much time it took he’d be there to help her heal.

   He swallowed as he leaned closer to her, almost afraid to hope. “What are you saying Aria?”

   She pressed her palm to his cheek. “They didn’t rape me Braith; they were waiting for you for that.” She tilted her head as her thumb brushed briefly across his bottom lip. “I wouldn’t have hated you if they had.”

   “I didn’t come for you. The other things they did to you.” His gaze focused on her finger and the lingering bites.

   “You did, when you could, and you came straight for me. Getting yourself, and everyone else killed for me, would have been foolish Braith. I’m glad you waited.”

   “I know you have nightmares.” She recoiled slightly, but he pressed her hand to his cheek before she could pull away completely. “I see the way you are now in the dark.”

   Her haunted eyes flitted away from him. “I didn’t like being in the caves, and the dungeons…” she shuddered as she bit her lip. “They were awful. I’d like to say that I’ll get over it one day, but I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to be in enclosed spaces like that again. Maybe one day we can turn the bathroom light off though.” She managed a tremulous smile as she dropped her cheek to her knee.

   “The worst thing they did…” Her nose scrunched up, disgust filtered over her features as her mouth pursed. “The king forced his blood into me, to keep me alive. To punish me and try to break me, but he didn’t. There may be lingering nightmares but I’m sure I’ll eventually stop having them. I’ll learn to deal with my fear of entrapment and the dark, and
time will eventually erase the taste.”

   He fought to keep his face impassive even as something malicious
coiled through his gut. The dark, he hadn’t realized that it bothered her until now. She had insisted that he leave the bathroom light on at night, but he’d just assumed that was because she no longer slept. The dungeons had left a lingering impression on her; one he suspected was even more profound than his father or Caleb.

   She closed her eyes and for a moment she looked so young, so vulnerable that it took everything he had not to snatch her up and firmly declare that she was never going to leave his arms again. It was a foolish thought though, impossible, and one she would only resent.

   “His blood was so different than yours. It was awful; I’d never tasted anything so vile.” Then she was looking at him again, her eyes clear and questioning. “Why was it so different?”

   “Because you belong with me.” It was the most simple, basic, and truthful answer that he could come up with.

   “I do don’t I?”

   “Yes.” He hadn’t meant it to but the word came out as a low growl.

   She smiled at him as her fingers flitted over his arm. “I could feel my body rebelling against his blood, fighting against its intrusion into my body. It’s intrusion into
you
. Even my body knew that only you belonged there.”

    She’d rendered him speechless.
Emotion entwined so firmly in his chest that he thought he might actually cry. He didn’t think he’d ever done that in his life. It was rage that drove him, an ardent drive to keep her safe, and an overwhelming urge to possess her in every way. This though, this was different. He loved her, he’d die for her, but he realized now that their relationship had been mostly driven by fear. Fear of her blood slave status, the fear that came of losing her, fear of failing in this war, fear of Caleb and his father.

   However, at the heart of it, at the very center of everything they had accomplished was the two of them, and this simple miraculous gift they’d been given, his love for her, and hers for him. It had driven them both to do things they’d never imagined they could do, and in the end they’d won. He didn’t know what their future held, but he knew that no matter what, this gift had been worth every nightmare it had brought to them, and every nightmare it may continue to bring.

   He was astounded by the love that flared through him and pushed aside his enduring hatred toward his father and brother. They were his past, and sitting before him was a future more promising and beautiful than any he’d ever dared to hope for.

   “Even if they had done more to me, I would still be glad that you hadn’t come. You did the right thing Braith. It may have taken me time to heal, but they wouldn’t have broken me. I’m not breakable, I may be shaken right now, but I’m not broken.” 

   She was right, she was grieving, she was trying to come to terms with the abuse she had suffered and the loss of her father, but she wasn’t broken. “You’ll make a remarkable queen Arianna.”

   She became rigid, her dusky eyes widened as she stared at him. “Braith, I’m aware of the fact that they won’t accept me as a human.” He pushed the long strands of her dark auburn hair behind her ear.
He relished in the silken feel of her skin beneath the palm of his hand as he lingered on her cheek. “And I know you don’t want to change me.”

   “It’s not that I don’t want to change you Aria, I would love nothing more than to spend eternity with you.”

   “But you’re frightened I won’t survive the change.”

   “There are some things we must discuss, when you’re feeling better.”

   Her forehead furrowed. “What things?”

   “Later Aria, for now take some time to heal. We
have
time now, enjoy it.”

   “We do, don’t we?” she replied with a small smile. “I miss him.”

   “I know.”

   “I wish he had survived to see us succeed.”

   “He knew.”

   Her eyes drifted closed as she rested her cheek on her knees again. He continued to hold her until the water turned cold, and he helped her out. She stood, shivering slightly as he dried her off with a towel and helped her into a robe. As they entered the sitting room Aria took a sudden step back at the sight of Jack on the couch with his legs leisurely crossed at the ankles. Braith wasn’t the least bit surprised to see his brother though.

   “I brought the food.”

   Aria eyed Jack warily as she circled around him to the tray of food he’d placed near the window. Keegan lifted his head to watch her for a moment before yawning and dropping his head back to his paws. “Thank you,” she muttered.