Santa Wore Combat Boots (7 page)

“That it is. I’m glad you’re starting to get your spirit back.”

“My spirit?” She took a large sip of wine, suddenly worried about where their conversation was headed. Did he know? Had he used his powers to figure it out?

“I don’t think it’s any secret, Emma, that you haven’t enjoyed the holidays over the last few years. I’ve been starting to worry about you.”

“I’ve told you why, and if you had known Larry, you would understand.” She put herself on the defensive. “Why do you constantly bring it up?” Her tone was harsher than she intended and she watched a flash of hurt and what looked like guilt cross his face.

“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to pry.” He tipped his glass, draining the deep red liquid. “It’s just that we’ve been neighbors for so long, and your kids are the best. You all deserve happy holidays. If the spirit of Christmas is in your heart, it gets reflected in your life.”

“The kids and I have done just fine these last three years.” She tried to finish her wine, but it seemed to burn her throat. She swirled the remaining liquid in the glass as memories of recent lonely holidays crashed down. Gripping the stem of her glass, she curled her legs beneath her. “I’m the one who’s sorry, Jake.”

“What do you mean?”

She wilted into the couch cushions. “We haven’t been fine, the kids and I. I’ve tried to do the best I can, but it’s so hard. All of our traditions...” Emma held back a sob. “There’s no one here to share them or help me. It’s just, just me.”

“There are people who care, Emma; you just have to let them in.”

“I know. I’m working on it.” She didn’t want to cry in front of him. Over the years, Jake had seen her tears of sorrow and frustration. Her mind quickly counted all of the times he’d been there to help her out of one jam or another.

As if he’d been sent to watch over me, she thought.

“I would say whatever it is you’re doing is agreeing with you.”

“Really? I’ve been trying new things.”

“Really. You have this glow about you I haven’t seen before.”

“Thanks, I could say the same for you.” Their eyes met, and she suddenly felt silly for saying that. “Well, you know, if a man could glow.”

Jake laughed. “I’ve never thought of myself as the glowing type.” His eyes turned serious, and she felt herself falling into the depths of the greenest eyes she’d ever seen.

“You’re a very special man, Jake Nicklaus.” Emma’s body seemed to have a will of its own as she leaned toward him. This was a bold move, but she couldn’t help herself. Being with Jake felt so right, she had to take the next step. She wanted to.

“Emma?” His arm stretched across the back of the sofa, ready to pull her in, when he hesitated. She could only nod, giving him the permission he needed to move closer.

“What’s this?” Emma leaned back as a downy feather floated in the air between them.

“Oh boy,” Jake’s voice seemed to quake as he sat up straight.

“That crazy cat! I swear there won’t be a bird left in this town if he has anything to say about it. And what birds could he possibly find that haven’t flown south and have white feathers.”

“Gulls, maybe?” Jake cleared his throat. “I should probably be going, it’s getting late.” He rose from the couch and headed toward the door.

“Oh.” She tried not to sound as disappointed as she felt. If she found that frisky feline he’d be spending a cold night outside for ruining her evening. “I guess you’re right.”

Emma walked Jake to the door, handing him his coat. She didn’t want the night to end and took a wild chance at small talk to keep him a bit longer. “So tomorrow’s Christmas Eve.”

“Yes, it is.” He eyed her curiously.

“And the next day is Christmas.”

“That’s usually how they fall.” He opened the door and started to walk out. She grabbed his arm to stop him.

“If you don’t have any plans, would you like to have Christmas dinner here with us? I mean, my parents will be coming over, but they won’t mind that you’re here. The more the merrier they always say, and well...I’d really like you to come.”

“Oh?” He looked down to where her hand gripped his bicep, then into her eyes.

“Why do you seem surprised?” she asked.

“It’s been a long time since I spent Christmas with anyone.”

“Well good. Then you can try something new, too.” She watched as he scanned the area around them and pointed above their heads at the mistletoe dangling from a red glittered ribbon.

“Why don’t we try something new together?” His voice was husky when he spoke. In an instant he pulled her in his arms and kissed her.

Emma’s body melted against his and she stood on tiptoe to wrap her arms around his neck. His kiss was soft and tender with a longing unlike anything she’d ever experienced. In his arms she felt safe and loved and wanted. He pulled away, and she knew she couldn’t hide the emotions bursting in her heart.

“I take that as a yes?” She hugged herself against the night chill, more evident now that she was out of his embrace.

“That is most definitely a yes.” He flashed a smile as bright as the December moon, saluted, and jogged down the steps. “Merry Christmas, Emma Turner.”

“Merry Christmas.” Emma closed the door feeling merrier than she had in years.

CHAPTER EIGHT

Emma stretched lazily in bed, glancing at the neon numbers on the clock across the room. The smile on her face was undeniable, and so was the joy in her heart. She had no idea how one simple day could change her life so much, but it had. The ice which protected her heart and shielded her emotions for so long had melted from the kiss of one special man.

And that man was going to share Christmas with her and the children.

Realizing all she needed to do, she bolted out of bed and slid her feet into a pair of fuzzy Grinch slippers. A gift from Traci two years ago, Emma laughed out loud. She was anything but a Grinch this year! Her best friend might not even recognize her tonight at the store. Emma knew she’d be in for the ‘I told you so’, but it didn’t matter. Her world was changing and for once she welcomed it with open arms.

She felt like a new woman, as if her very own fairy godmother had swept down and bonked her with some kind of magic wand. Emma practically floated down the stairs and began hauling up boxes from the basement. Leaving the tubs of ornaments for the kids to help, she set about placing holiday trinkets around the house as she softly hummed Christmas Carols.

“Mommy! What are you doing?” Sarah’s shocked voice startled her. Emma turned to face her daughter’s gaping mouth.

“I’m decorating for Christmas,” she said matter-of-factly, then continued placing the Three Wise Men by the baby Jesus. “Want to help?”

“But, you never decorate. I mean, not a lot, not like this.” Sarah inspected every candle and decoration Emma had set out. “Why now?” The ever inquisitive girl helped add straw to the manger before pausing to wait for an answer.

“I know, sweetheart, and I’m so sorry.” Emma stroked Sarah’s long blond hair. “I’m promising to do better with all holidays, not just Christmas.” To her surprise, Sarah spun around and wrapped Emma in a bear hug. “Oh my, what is that for, all this decorating?”

“No. I told you he was magic, didn’t I?”

“Are we talking about Mr. Nicklaus again?” The wide smile on Emma’s face made Sarah laugh.

“Yes! You see, Jake-” Sarah stopped when Emma cleared her throat. “I mean, Mr. Nicklaus.” Sarah waited for her mother’s nod of approval. “When we were glittering the snowflakes, Jake said he wanted to help you find Christmas again. And he did, Mommy, he did!” Sarah threw herself into her mother’s arms again and Emma held her tight. “I have my mommy back.”

Emma never dreamed that Sarah would have picked up on all of the changes over the years. She tried to be so careful when the kids were around, especially Sarah, sticking with holiday traditions as much as she dared or as much as her heart could take. Other than the lack of decorations, she never thought her daughter would have noticed the emptiness in her heart.

This was truly a special day and Emma’s new beginning.

“Why don’t you wake your brother, and we’ll decorate the tree after breakfast.” Emma wiped at a tear so Sarah wouldn’t see. “I don’t have to be at work until two o’clock.”

“
Aww
, you have to work? Why? It’s Christmas Eve?” Sarah wailed, balling her fists. A knot formed in Emma’s stomach at the disappointment painted on her daughter’s face.

“I always work it.” A choice she’d willingly made the year Larry died because she couldn’t face being home without him. She’d leave Sarah with her mother and pick her up the next morning in time for presents. She’d never even bothered with a tree until now. Now she wished she could stay home and be with her family. She knew at the last minute like this, she’d never get anyone to cover for her. Traci only came along so Emma wouldn’t be alone every year, but Emma knew she’d rather
be with her family, too. “Someone has to help those last minute shoppers. Besides, maybe this year they will close the store early.”

“Can
Ja
-” Sarah pushed out a frustrated sigh. “Can Mr. Nicklaus stay with us like he did the last time you worked late?”

“Oh, honey, I don’t think so.” Even though the thought of coming home to Jake and the kids created a flurry of excitement in her body, she had to be logical. After all this time as neighbors and friends, they were just now getting to know each other. She’d invited him to Christmas dinner, and that was a start. She couldn’t let herself assume he would be free on Christmas Eve, especially to watch the kids. “I’m sure he has other plans. He did accept my invitation to dinner Christmas Day, so you will get to see him.”

“Yay!” I will go wake up Ben. I can’t wait to show off our beautiful tree!” And just like that, Sarah dashed out of the room.

Christmas Eve was reserved for Larry. It was as if his spirit knew she needed him this time of year more so than any other. She never saw him, but she felt him and that’s all she needed. She would catch him up on the children and the house and tell him how much she missed him and that she would never stop loving him. She always knew he was there. If she concentrated hard enough she could smell fuel or gunpowder, she didn’t know which. While he never spoke, she would feel the wisp of his kiss, like a cool spring breeze on her lips before he left.

Emma couldn’t wait to tell him her news this year. She wanted him to know all about Jake. He was such a good friend and neighbor, and...

A flood of guilt surrounded her as she stared down at the Santa Claus figurine in her hand. The round St. Nick wore army fatigues, yet sported his trademark red hat and the red sack over his shoulder was stuffed with toys. It was one Larry sent to her their first Christmas apart after he joined the service. He’d included a note saying this was what he would look like after her holiday cooking. Emma hugged the figurine to her chest, suddenly doubting her new found feelings for Jake.

“But he makes me smile,” she spoke to the top of the bare tree. “I haven’t felt like this in so long, and it feels good to be genuinely happy.” Emma held the figurine so she could look into its twinkling eyes, as if she were talking to Larry. “I can’t ever replace you, but I think it’s time for me to spread my wings just a little. Jake is such a caring and honorable man. I know you would like him.”

Soon, with the help of Jake, she would be able to communicate with Larry often and the two men she cared about most would be able to know each other. The three of them would have a bond like no other, and her world once again would be perfect. She would have everything she needed, thanks to Jake Nicklaus.

“Mommy, come on. We want to decorate!” Sarah stood next to an open box, with Ben covered in silver icicles.

“Oh my!” Emma laughed as she peeled a mass of tinsel off Ben’s head. “How about we put some of this on the tree?”

Emma enjoyed herself with each string of lights and ornaments she and the kids added to the tree. They sang Christmas songs and by the time they finished, the house looked like Christmases of old when Larry was still alive.

“This is how Christmas should be,” Sarah said as she took Emma’s hand and they all stepped back to admire the tree.

“Yes, sweetheart¸ it is.” And from now on all of their Christmases would be like this.

***

Jake paced from one end of his small house to the other. Something as spontaneous as that kiss under the mistletoe had troubled him all night. Emma was so beautiful, and after the day they’d shared, he couldn’t help himself. Her lips were so soft and inviting. He had to fight his surprise
when she’d kissed him back! Her invitation to Christmas dinner meant everything to him. Was she telling him she was ready to take that next step? Could she possibly be feeling the same things he was? There was one thing Jake was one-hundred-percent sure of.

He’d fallen in love with Emma Turner.

Love wasn’t what he’d signed on for. He’d promised Larry he’d watch over them. He was a soldier, and for three long years Jake had kept his word. Over the years he’d fought his growing feelings as much as he could. Duty bound or not, he couldn’t hide them any longer. Emma and the kids were all he thought about, all he wanted. He found himself waiting to catch glimpses of them coming and going from the house and looking for any reason to help her out. She always welcomed him with a smile. He’d give anything to come home to that smile of hers every night.

Anything.

“It’s about time you showed up,” Jake said when he felt the rush of frosty air suck into the room like a vacuum. “Where’ve you been, Sir, we need to talk.”

In a twirl of light, the vision of Larry Turner appeared. Jake could feel the wall of tension emanating from the spirit. After everything which had transpired between him and his wife yesterday, Jake couldn’t blame him. Only now he needed to make the Major understand what he felt for Emma was true.

“Talk?” the spirit’s voice rasped as he fought to take a more solid form. “Why should I talk to you when you’re taking everything from me?”

“It’s not like that, and you know it.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Maybe you should. I’m speaking the truth.”

“You vowed to protect her, not fall in love with her.”

“God help me but I do love her, Sir. I would lay down my life for her and those kids.”

“Just as I laid down my life for you?”

“It’s our duty.” Jake froze with the reminder of the guilt he’d carried for the last three years.

Had he not broken his leg while practicing maneuvers, he would have been on that chopper with his comrades. The team needed a fourth, and Larry volunteered to take his place. An hour later, the chopper had been shot down and there were no survivors. All of them were family men, but because of him, Larry never g
ot to see the birth of his son.

“And you had a duty to me, Sergeant. Watch over them, not take my place. I’ve seen the look in my daughter’s eyes when she sees you coming. My own son thinks you’re his father. And now I’m losing my Emma to you. This is not what I expected of you, amigo. I thought you were my friend?”

“I am your friend, Larry. You asked me to help her get her Christmas spirit back, and that’s what I did. There is nothing I wouldn’t do for you or your family, and you know that. I didn’t ask to fall in love with her, but it happened. I’ve been a wanderer most of my life. Emma has shown me how much I want roots and a family of my own.”

“So you’re stealing mine?”

“I need her as much as she needs me. She and the kids have given me a reason to put my feet on the floor every morning and be thankful. I never knew such love existed until I spent time with Emma.”

“I won’t let you take them from me.”

“Sir, you have to let go. She loves you and she always will. She keeps your memory alive for the children, and one day Ben will understand and know you were his father. Right now, they have to live and enjoy the life they have. Emma can’t live in the past anymore, clinging to a life she will never have again. It’s time for her to move forward. She can’t do that until you let her go.”

“I can’t. She’s the only thing keeping me here. If only I could touch her one last time, maybe even dance with her like we used to.” The spirit man’s image dimmed and glowed. Jake felt the sadness radiate through the air. “She’s all I’ve got. If I let go, what will become of me?”

“You’re the best of the best. You can’t be afraid. You will move on to a better place, and Emma will be free to experience life and love.”

“With you?”

“If she’ll have me.”

Larry’s image expanded and contracted with his wavering emotions. Jake saw all of the love, hurt and anger flash like northern lights. Pictures fell from the wall, end tables tipped over and the small fire ceased to burn in the hearth as Larry unleashed his turmoil. He stopped before Jake, staring him down as only a commanding officer can, and then vanished in a flash of bright white.

Jake tried to put himself in Larry’s place, as he should have been since that fateful day. How would he feel if a living man wanted to take his wife? He knew without question he couldn’t give up on a woman like Emma. How could he expect Larry to? It was going to take nothing short of a Christmas miracle.