Second Chance at Forever (Forever Book 2) (2 page)

…seventeen years later

“MR. REED, EXCUSE ME, sir, for the intrusion, but you have a visitor here to see you.”

I looked up from my computer screen with agitation directed at my temporary assistant filling in for Jenny while she was out sick today. She looked like a scared rabbit, as she should be. I always without fail expected my requests understood and met with no misinterpretations.

“Catherine, I believe I gave you strict instructions not to disturb me this morning.”
God knows this day was hard enough already.

“Yes sir, I understand, but not even for your father?” She replied with a hint of sarcasm in her voice. I once again looked up from my computer with a warning look that had her checking her attitude at my door.

Dammit! What the hell is he doing here? And without calling first.
Of all days to get a visit from my father. It was Jackson’s birthday, and sadly the anniversary of his mother’s death. I had a love/hate relationship with this day. I lost my wife, my best friend, and the mother of my child—my only child. What should have been the greatest day of our lives went dark when she was taken from me¸ and from
our son.
I was extremely busy today of all days, and then I got an unexpected visit from Phillip Reed himself. I stopped glaring at my assistant and tried to calm my already rising blood pressure. “Catherine, you may show him in.”

“I was beginning to think that I would be barred from seeing you. Knowing you, Walker, I might have thought I was on a proscribed list. I don’t appreciate having to stand out in the hallway and be expected to wait to be granted access to you,” he said as he strode in with his always cool demeanor. Not getting up from behind my desk to greet him as he expected me to, I simply just looked up at him.

“That’s what you get when you interrupt one’s work day. Hello, father, and what are you doing here in California?”

“Can’t a father drop in on his only son and say hello?”

“Not when you live in New York. So what do I owe the honor of this impromptu visit?”

He walked over to my bar and helped himself to my favorite malted scotch. “Walker, I was up in San Francisco taking care of some personal business and wanted to stop by on my way home to visit with Jackson. After all, it is his eighteenth birthday. Would you mind if I take him out for the day?”

“Father, you don’t need my permission to see Jackson, and I am well aware of what today is. If you want to see your grandson, then you know where to find him. He has a lighter class schedule today and should be home from school in about an hour. I do have plans with him this evening, so your time with your grandson will be short.”
I’ll be damned if I was going to rearrange my plans with my son to accommodate my father. He should have made better arrangements if he wanted to celebrate Jackson’s birthday with him.

“Son, I know how hard this day is for you, and I don’t want to make it worse for you by being here.” He looked almost remorseful, but I knew better. Phillip Reed didn’t give a rat’s ass about my feelings, and he sure as hell didn’t know what I was feeling especially when it came to that day.

“Walker, while I wait for Jackson, how about we have a chat? I have some matters that I would like to discuss with you. I noticed that a bid proposal was submitted for Johns Hopkins Hospital again. Why is that? Didn’t we already do an expansion project for them?”

And here he is…my father. A few empty words of condolences, and then it’s business as usual.
Counting to ten to remain calm, I fixed myself a much needed drink and knocked it back before I answered him.

“You know we did, father, and why do you care what comes across
my
desk anyway?” I wanted to make it clear to him whose office he was in.

“I was just wondering, son. We usually don’t take on projects of this nature.”

“You’re right. We normally don’t.”

“Why then?”

“What is this, Twenty Questions? You know why we built that building. An opportunity presented itself to me, and it was my way to honor Elizabeth.”

“Oh yes, by putting her name on a building.”

“Careful, father. I don’t know what you’re trying to pull out of me, or deflect me from the real reason to why you’re here, but my patience is wearing thin.”

“Why so defensive, son? I am merely asking a question, and here you are, flying off the handle.”

“Father, it’s not a manner of being defensive. This is me knowing you all too well that this is not a social call. You asking questions to something you already know leads me to believe that you’re here for something else.”

“Walker, I have no hidden agenda.”

“No agenda? Oh please! The wheels in your head are always spinning in a thousand directions. You breathe, eat, and sleep hidden agendas, but okay—I’ll bite. When the hospital initially approached me with their bid proposal, I was skeptical at first. My team carefully went through the proposal, and once I learned what the building was intended for, I immediately approved it. So yes, father, my late wife’s name sits proudly on a building that
I
designed in memory for her. I hear the neurosurgeon that this wing is intended for is making great strides in stroke research. He is supposed to be the best in the country, and the hospital is doing everything in their power to keep him happy. Johns Hopkins has asked me to consider designing an extension wing to what they have now, a bigger space for his research. I haven’t had any opportunity to peruse the proposal yet, okay? Now that you’ve been updated, are we done with the Q and A part of this discussion?”

“It’s a shame that you never made the ribbon cutting ceremony. I was all too happy to step in for you and support Jackson.”

Son of a bitch! He didn’t just go there.
His mentioning of Jackson’s name hit the one trigger that I possessed.

“You’re unbelievable, father! You of all people know why I missed it. I can’t believe for rhyme or reason why you would remind me of that. I was in Europe at the time, and you know why I was there. I would have never missed that dedication ceremony if I didn’t have to clean up yet another mess you left me before officially retiring. Oh, and let’s make one thing very clear…You will never fill my shoes when it comes to my son!”

“Walker, I wasn’t trying to.”

“Good. It will be a cold day in hell before I ever let anyone come between me and my son, least of all you. Now that I have answered your questions, give me the same courtesy and answer one of mine. Why are you here?”

“I believe I answered that question already. I wanted to see Jackson, and just because I don’t participate in the day to day doesn’t mean I’m not privy to what is going on around here.”

“Father, that’s where you’re wrong. I run this company! And I alone. You, Phillip Reed, are retired. You needn’t worry about what comes across
my
desk. This includes past, present, and future projects that Reed Global will be involved with. Are we done here? Because I know I am.” My father was silent while rubbing his fingers along his chin. I continued, “Now, if you don’t have anything else to say, please show yourself out.”

No words?
I glanced back over to him, and he looked as if he was contemplating his next chess move. Not wanting to wait and growing tired of this, I continued to talk. “Father, I need to leave for my meeting.”

My dismissal of my father may have been cold, but it paled in comparison to how he treated me over the years. I usually go a few rounds of friendly war-like banter with my father, but today was not the day for the usual tongue lashing we seemed to give one another.

I never handled the anniversary of this day very well, but I always held back for my son’s sake. I had a nightmare the night before. I usually can keep them buried deep down, but as the anniversary of Elizabeth’s death approached, they always returned. I shot up out of my bed that morning with cold beads of sweat covering my head and body. It was still dark outside with no signs of the early morning dawn. I quickly dressed and phoned my trainer. I needed to rid my lingering nightmare out of my mind, and the best way I knew how was to punch the bag until my knuckles bled.

I went three rounds with my trainer until he knocked me on my ass. I ran six miles on the treadmill, and then I must have done one hundred sit-ups. My muscles were on fire. After my hot steam and shower, I felt a little better but guilty that I ran out on my son before wishing him a happy birthday. I phoned him on my way to the office, and of course he was understanding. He always understood how I felt about this day and gave me the time I needed to work my way through it. It was unfair to him. His birthday should be celebrated with no pains from the past. I promised him we would celebrate when I arrive home. Jackson simply agreed with what I had arranged and wished me a good day. Now my father was unexpectedly standing in my office, and I wanted him gone. I blinked back into the now and stopped myself from revisiting my nightmare and deal with the matter at hand…Phillip Reed. My father was silent as he turned to leave my office and stopped abruptly at the door. He shocked me with what he said next.

“Are you happy, Walker?”

What the hell?
“What kind of question is that?” I asked him.

“It’s an honest one, Walker, and I would like an answer.”

“Define happy, father? I run this company, and I have my son. Anything beyond that doesn’t matter.”

“You don’t get to pick and choose what matters, son. It doesn’t work that way. Everything matters. You’re more than just the man who sits here all day in this big office. I was that man, dammit! And I don’t want you to become me. I’m sorry, Walker. I never meant to have things work out the way they did.”

Pinching the bridge of my nose, I felt a headache coming on. I listened to my father drone on and on, and I didn’t have the slightest inkling on what in the hell he was talking about. I walked over to my father to look in his eyes. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Pain radiated through my jaw muscles as I clenched my teeth.

“Father, I am exactly who you wanted me to be. You say you’re sorry? For what, may I ask? I can’t do this dance with you anymore; it’s just too late. I have done everything you ever asked and wanted me to do, and yet you stand here and ask me if I’m happy. You want the truth? No, I’m not! Because this is not the life I wanted…but I got it…so I live it. The one thing I wanted and have always wanted, I can’t have. I focus on what I do have, and that’s Jackson. My son is my only priority. Now I know that’s not something you’re familiar with, but in my world it’s everything. On her deathbed, I promised Elizabeth that I would always put our son first. She gave her life for our boy, and I vowed never to let him down.”

I had rage emerging from the deep depths of my soul. I thought I had laid my demons to rest when it came to my father, but somehow they always seemed to resurface at my most vulnerable time. Today would be one of those days.

“Who made you this way, Walker? I’m looking into your eyes, and I see no light behind them. They are dark and cold. For a man that has everything, you would think you would be happier,” he said as he gestured his hand around my office.

The old man has got to be losing his mind.
I laughed to myself. Trying to remain in control was never easy while dealing with Phillip Reed. I took a deep breath before answering him.

“You made me this way, father. Please don’t stand here and try to say otherwise. I am my father’s son, the mogul you groomed me to be.” At that moment, my mind went directly to Reese. She was what I wanted, who I always wanted, but I lost her for reasons I still to this day did not know and understand. Today of all days, my loyalties should only be with Elizabeth. It would be a dishonor to her to name my former lover in this conversation.

“I would prefer that you leave, but you staying gives me no choice than to have this conversation with you. You say I have everything? Well, if that were true, then Elizabeth would be here right now, but instead I had to put her in the fucking ground. In the ground, father! Two days after our son was born. How is that everything? No amount of money and power can ever bring her back to me and Jackson. My eyes are dark today because even after all of these years that have passed, I still miss her. She was taken in the cruelest way possible, and my son had to grow up without his mother. She never even held him!” I shouted at the top of my lungs.

He stared at me as I took in my ragged breaths. He was the last person I wanted to share my feelings with. I had buried them deep for so long, it was taking every ounce of control not to be enraged at my father. I was sure half my staff had heard me by now. I threw my hands in the air and looked to him, trying to figure out what he was hiding behind his eyes.

“What is it, father? Are you looking for absolution or something? My eyes were wide open when I took over this company from you. It was my legacy, remember? So to question my choices now after all these years would simply be futile at this point.”

He finally responded. “I am so sorry, Walker, so very sorry. I have made many mistakes with you, son. You can’t even begin to understand why I’ve done what I’ve done. Walker, I need to…”