Seconds Before Sunrise (The Timely Death Trilogy) (17 page)

“I’ve had a drink before,” I argued.

Robb took a drag, and he squinted. “Taking a sip from your mother’s wine glass doesn’t count.”

Heat rushed over my cheeks, and he leaned forward, skimming my face with his knuckle. His hand smelt like smoke. “That’s wha
t I thought,” he whispered.

I dro
pped my face to avoid his touch, but his hand lingered in the air. He flicked his cigarette onto the ground. It bounced past our feet in a trail of smoke, sizzling out quicker than I expected it to.

“I don’t think you should
come tomorrow,” Robb said.

My neck popped when I looked up.
“Why?”

His sigh was a visual fog in the chilly weather.
“Mixing alcohol and emotions is never a good combination.”

I crossed my arms, contradicting
my words, “I’m not emotional.”

“Who said I was talking about you?” His brown eyes were torn as he c
losed the distance between us.

“What are—” Crystal’s voice broke through
us as she leapt around the corner. I jumped away from Robb, but he didn’t budge. Her eyes darted around, but they slid into a glare.

“We weren’t doin
g anything,” I blurted out.

Crystal pointed to the ground.
“Lola will freak if she finds cigarette butts in her yard.”

“Yeah. Yeah,” Robb grumbled, bending
down to pick it up. He walked right past us, but Crystal’s focus was on me.

“Did something happen?” she asked, shivering in the wind. She hadn’t even bothered to put on a coat.

“Just complaining about my dreams again.”

Crystal fo
lded her arms. “I don’t get why you complain about them,” she said, and I expected her to pry, but she winked. “Those boys sound cute.”

I thought of the people I
had seen in my recent dream. They hadn’t been the two in my bedroom, yet I had recognized Bracke’s name. It sounded bizarre, but so was the conversation. I couldn’t make sense of it, but I couldn’t admit I was even more conflicted than before. Crystal was worried enough.

“Are you girls coming in?” Robb shouted from the door.

“Yes,” Crystal responded, but I grabbed her arm and pulled her around the corner.

“Is something wrong with Robb?” I mo
uthed. I didn’t want him to hear.

“Why don’t you ask him?” She was
loud enough for him to eavesdrop.

I tightened my grip
on her arms. “He seems bummed.”

She rolled her eyes. “Linda and him keep breaking up,” she dismissed his peculiar behavior. “It’s normal.”

But Robb’s gestures weren’t, especially if it focused on his on-and-off again girlfriend.

“She isn’t coming tomorrow,” Crystal clarified, looping her arm through mine. “You won’t have to worry about drama.”

But, apparently, I had to worry about Robb’s emotional state.

I leaned into Crys
tal for support as we walked toward the doorway into her house. “Do you think you’ll be able to sleep over tomorrow?”

“Yeah.”

She leapt a few inches into the air, practically pulling me with her. “I can’t wait.” She ran up the three steps to the door and put her hands on my shoulders. Without warning, she shook me.

My head rattled, and I blinked at her when she stopped. “That’s the Jess I know,” she said, seeing something in my face I couldn’t
feel for myself. “It isn’t healthy to dwell on everything around you all the time.” She pushed the door open, and the heat washed over my skin. “You’ll get wrinkles before your twenties.”

I wanted to say I didn’t care about that, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it.
Robb was right about one thing − I had stopped standing up for myself, even though I didn’t know why. It was as if I’d lost part of myself that brought fulfillment, and I was trying to fill it with empty distractions.

Eric

It had been three days since my father left, three days since speaking to Eu, and three days since I contemplated leaving.

I stood next to my car,
considering my options. I doubted I could leave Hayworth without getting hurt, but I needed to know if it were factual. It would help narrow down Darthon’s identity. If I couldn’t leave, he couldn’t either, which meant he probably went to my school. It would mean he could only one of the boys in Hayworth. I didn’t know where to go from there, but it was a place to start.

I got in and turned over the engine.

It rumbled down the street as I drove through Hayworth, unsure of my decision. It had been made, and I could still change it, but I didn’t want to. I passed Jonathon’s house first. His little brother was outside, but Brenthan didn’t recognize my new car. He didn’t even look up. I hoped George wasn’t looking out of a window.

Jes
sica’s house was next, but I couldn’t bring myself to look. Her bedroom window was in the front, and the reminder was too tempting. I passed Eu’s shortly afterwards, but a part of me wished he had seen me − so he knew I was making the decision after I had carefully thought it over.

Even if I were rebelling against the Dark,
I had to try to leave Hayworth again.

I erased all thoughts from my mind as I neared the highway ramp I’d crashed at. I wasn’t thinking, but my stomach was twisting, and my palms were sweating. The unwanted reaction was uncontrollable, but I concentrated as Urte had taught me in training, and it disappeared as the car sped up, tilting to the left as I readied to merge.

The moment had the potential to hurt me again, to ruin my success, but I kept my eyes open. I wanted to see what my future truly entailed. I wanted to see if I could figure out Darthon’s identity before he knew mine.

I held my breath as I made it to the top and merged over. My grip loosened when nothing happened. I exhaled as the car continued forward on the highway, but disappointment seeped into me.

Darthon could be from any town, and I’d lost control of my car by myself. The only theory we had was gone, and Hayworth melted behind me as undeniable proof. The people who were booking hotel rooms had to have been shades and lights moving in for the fight, and the war seemed more destined than ever before.

I had to prepare myself, but I could
n’t return in that moment. I wanted to see the next town over − something I had never seen before. Even if it only lasted one night, I could pretend I was running away, like I belonged somewhere else, and I could forget the ramifications of my tested actions.

Tonight, I wouldn’t find Darthon in Hayworth, but he wouldn’t find me either.

Jessica

The bar was loud. I
always expected them to be chaotic, and this one was too loud to think. I hadn’t even had a drink yet. I was nervous enough about getting in, but they hadn’t even carded me, and my burst of nerves seemed as useless as the fake ID Zac had created. It sat in my purse, unused, and I couldn’t believe I had it. A year ago, I wouldn’t have, and my past-self lectured me through the cranked music and smoke.

“I didn’t know it was legal to smoke inside,” I said, thinking of the Kansas laws, but no one heard me
.

A crowd of young adults
− slightly older than us − screamed at a basketball game on the television, and I wondered if they hadn’t been carded as well. One of the boys even looked like he was wearing the same uniform Zac had.

“On the house,” Crystal said, setting down three beers
. They sloshed over the rim as she sat down and pointed her thumb over her shoulder. “Jeff won’t stop hitting on me.”

I glanced at the puppy-eyed bartender behin
d the wooden countertop. He was talking to another customer, but he was watching Crystal. He was probably why we got in so easily.

“He gave me a free shot, too.” She had to speak abnormally loud for us to hear.

Robb grabbed his glass, indifferent to her small talk. He downed a few gulps, but he didn’t flinch. All I could recall was how my face twisted with disgust the only time I had accidentally sipped my dad’s beer.

“Go ahead, Jess,” Crystal encouraged, drinking hers with the same nonchalant attitude Robb had.

I touched the glass, pulled away, and grabbed it again. I didn’t want to look out of place with all of the bartenders around. I was paranoid about getting caught, but I was more worried about the effects it’d have. I’d seen my parents drunk enough to know how secrets slipped. It was how I learned my biological parents had died.

“It isn’t that bad,” Rob
b added, speaking with his glass to his lips.

I glanced down at
the brown liquid one last time and sipped it. I tried to fight my expression, but I cringed. It tasted how I remembered.

Crystal giggled, tapping my arm. “It gets better after the first one.”

“I don’t see how that’s possible,” I admitted through a small cough.

“You’ll see,” Crystal said, chugging more. She was already halfway through the first one.

I followed her example but closed my eyes to prevent myself from spitting it back into the glass. It was disgusting. The taste, the smell, everything. I forced myself to continue until it was halfway gone. I met Robb’s widened eyes when I put it back on the table.

“See?” Crystal excla
imed, bouncing up from her seat. “I’ll get a second round.”

“Already?” I squeaked.

Robb rolled his eyes. “She just wants to talk to Jeff.”

Crystal ignored him as she strode awa
y. She was acting as if Zac didn’t exist anymore.

“Jess?” Robb spoke up, and I drank again. I didn’
t know what he would say to me after the night before. “Why did you follow me outside?”

“I need
to ask you something.” The confession slipped out effortlessly, and my sips turned into a heated flush across my body.

He
raised his brow. “Why didn’t you?”

I gestured to Crystal. “I wanted to ask you alone.”

He placed his empty glass on the table. I hadn’t even noticed he finished it. “You can ask me now.”

I bit my lip. It felt strange to talk so loudly about private matters, but I knew he wouldn’t hear me if I didn’t. “Why did Zac have your car the other day?”

Robb’s calm expression faltered. “What are you talking about?”

He had to have known. “I wa
s jogging, and Zac drove by in your car,” I explained. I didn’t want to tell him what his friend had said to me.

“You jog?” Robb asked.

“Why does everyone seem to have a problem with that?” I whined.

He chuckled. “You’re
a little too fragile to be running around by yourself.”

My muscles in my arm tightened. “How’d you know I was by myself?” I asked,
too focused to be irritated by his fragile comment. He knew about Zac’s run-in with me. “Robb—”

“I needed new brakes, and I was too busy studying to ta
ke it in myself,” he said. “That’s it.”

I didn’t have a reason to
distrust him, but it didn’t seem like enough. “What classes were you studying for?”

He rubbed the back of his neck, glancing over his shoulder to survey Crystal. She was coming toward us. “What’s wi
th the interrogation, Jess?” He leaned across the table. “Just tell me what’s bothering you.”

Zac was, but I
couldn’t say it without it getting back to him, and that was the last thing I needed.

“Round two,
” Crystal announced, slamming more drinks on the table. This time, there were shots with the beer.

Robb gladly picked his liquor up. “You chase with the beer,” he said, but his tone made it sound less like an explanation and more like he was talking down to me.

I grabbed mine, refusing to drop my eye contact. “I got that part,” I mumbled.

Crystal clin
ked hers against mine before Robb’s. “To the night,” she toasted, tipping hers back at the same time Robb did. I followed and gripped the table when my throat burned. I wouldn’t cough this time.

“What was that?” I managed, but my voice sounded rough.

“Vodka,” Crystal said, sipping her beer. The mixing of the two was as unpleasant as the way my first beer had tasted.

After a few more sips and a couple of minutes, I could feel my fingers tingling. I stretched them out and stared at them like I’d see sparkles, but they were my usual nails.

“Feels good, doesn’t it?”

Robb’s slurred voice
startled me as much as his closeness did. He moved to sit next to me, and he placed his elbow on the back of my chair. I tried to scoot away, but my feet slid across the ground where I had tried to get traction.

“It feels weird,” I admitted, standing up. “I should go—” My legs wobbled, and Crystal shot up, wrapping her arm around my waist. She forced a little dance like we
had planned it and put me back in my seat.