Secret Desire (13 page)

“I’ve never eaten here, but the reviews are good.” He extended a hand to help her from the car.

“Looks charming.” She smiled and held on to his arm as they walked up to the maître d’.

“Yes, sir. Do you have reservations?”

“Murray, two at six-thirty.”

“Yes. Mr. Murray…Miss.” The gentleman motioned to them. “Please follow me.”

They sat in a corner table. Fresh flowers adorned every nook and horizontal surface. Candlelight glowed, radiating off from Claire’s skin.

“Would you care for some wine?”

“Yes, please.” She smoothed out her dress beneath her.

“Let’s look at the menu and then we’ll decide red or white.”

“Do you want to share?” She turned her lips up in a shy smile. “Remember how we’d order our meals and divide each plate?”

He laughed. “Always fun to see if the grass is greener.”

She blushed and looked down to read the menu. “The salmon sounds delicious.”

“Okay then how about the pasta del mar?”

“Yes, that was my second choice.”

He ordered their food and selected the wine. Cappellano’s 2004 Barolo Rupestris. After his perfect pronunciation of the Italian wine, the waiter asked if he’d ever lived in Italy.

“I’ve been fortunate to travel to Italy and Sicily. Lovely country and people.”

She smiled and leaned forward. “I loved traveling through France and Italy. I guess it’s different with you. No backpacks and hostels.”

“That would have been fun. I had the pleasure of factory tours and meetings.”

Her dress was tiny and tight, not leaving him with an option but to admire her breasts. He reached for his water glass to force his eyes elsewhere. He drank the entire glass of water without stopping.

“Well, you were certainly thirsty. Would you care for my water?” She swirled one finger over the inside of his palm lying open on the table.

He set his empty water glass down. “No, thanks. I’ve had enough water.” He captured her finger within his hand and leaning over promising himself, one kiss. Her glance shifted. Dustin caught sight of the waiter, and he squeezed and then released her finger.

The waiter displayed the bottle and uncorked and poured the wine.

“In your work, you traveled overseas much?” She took a sip of wine.

“Yes. Too much. I suppose it makes life exciting, but traveling alone can get old fast.”

“Really? I’ll take your word for it.”

“I’d love to return with you, spend time enjoying the view.”

The candlelight bounced and reflected off her hair. He imagined how it would have been if he’d had her with him overseas. A world of difference.

The ringlets draped over her arms, and he touched one. “Your hair is so soft, just like silk.”

She reached out and touched his arm. His desire all but thumped against the underside the table. Their food arrived and although he enjoyed the meal, he couldn’t remember what anything tasted like or what they’d actually talked about during dinner. He was entranced by her smile, her laugh, and each time she bit her lip. He grabbed the table to stop himself from leaning across and sampling her mouth reddened by the wine. He had hoped it would be possible to contain his longing, but he was wrong. The depth of his desire set him on fire. He was beyond concentrating on anything but the most mundane of activities.

He’d promised to show her around town but at that moment, he wanted to do nothing of the sort. There were two hotels that he could think of and he wanted to check into a room with her. His cock strained against his trousers. He adjusted his pants but he’d hardly be able to hide this state of affairs.

He paid the bill and took hold of her hand. He all but pulled her out of the restaurant.

“Are you all right?”

He swallowed and stared at his hand on her arm. There was no friction or drag in his flight of desire. He was on a straight path to taking complete possession of her. He’d burn up from the heat if he didn’t slow down. He felt incoherent standing next to her and closed his eyes, gathering every ounce of self-control.

“Yes, I’m fine.” He combed his fingers through his hair and raised his eyes her. “No. That’s a lie.”

Chapter Nine

Claire could see he was in pain. It couldn’t be the food they’d eaten. She felt fine. His face paled under his tan and sweat beaded on his forehead.

“I’ll take a rain check on the tour.” She was unable to put aside her concern. “Are you ill?”

He rubbed his temple. “Claire—” He stopped when his car pulled up. “Damn.”

Dustin opened her door and arranged her dress. This time he didn’t reach across to get the seatbelt. “Do you know where the belt is located?” His voice sounded strained.

She felt between the seats. “Yes, I’ve got it.”

He got in and gripped the steering wheel with both hands. “I need to talk to you. Can we go somewhere?”

“What about the lake?”

He nodded and drove out of the parking lot. She focused on seeing the town this time. Neighborhoods that were once dilapidated had undergone renovations. Several blocks of brightly colored small homes surrounded by picket fences and gardens made up the neighborhood around the restaurant.

“So many changes.” She regarded the houses as they passed by her gaze. “Positive changes, I mean.”

“This section of town has been highly sought after. It’s gained a reputation as artsy.”

The shops and galleries reminded her of a smaller version of Ballard back in Seattle. Even a prestigious private school was settled on the corner, its fenced yard filled with modern playground equipment.

“They opened a Day School?”

“The first private school. Besides the catholic parochial school.”

Whatever had come over him didn’t seem as serious now, and he had relaxed while driving.

“Are you feeling better?”

“Yes. I wish I could blame the food or restaurant, but that’s not it. Claire, I don’t want to rush you. I keep telling myself to give you time. I’ve no right to take advantage of you, especially when you’re mourning your parents, and next week or next month you’d regret getting involved.”

He turned into the entrance of the park. The lake was further down the road. The dark water bordered by clumps of cattails hadn’t changed. They’d both learned how to ski on the lake during grade school. They had spent many afternoons fishing and catching tadpoles. As far back as she could remember, he had been part of her life.

“No. I’m not using you to bear this burden. I know what you’re saying. This is a strange time, but why not? Out of one tragedy, at least there’s something that reaffirms what my parents believed in. I think they always wanted me to give you another shot. I’ve grown up since leaving home. I’ve got my own secrets and my own dreams. I’m trying to find my way too. I’ve changed from the girl that left home filled with unrealistic expectations.”

She wanted to tell him about her secret writing but didn’t know if he’d care or understand. Would he think she was love-starved? She wasn’t exactly comfortable with the idea of being an erotica author but she’d decided this was her passion. It might not have been her decision to share her stories with the world, but it was happening and she could sulk or rejoice. There was no denying part of her was overjoyed even if she was nervous. She no longer needed anyone’s approval. Dustin had never been one to be judgmental. Maybe she could trust him to give her the freedom to be her own person.

“I don’t know if your shoes can navigate the grass.”

“I’ll take them off.” She unwound the ties. Dustin watched her. His face regained color, changing from the pale ashen at the restaurant to a flushed appearance that ran from the collar of his shirt up to his cheeks. The look of pain returned to his face, and she worried that she was somehow the cause of his distress.

He opened his car door and came round to help her out. She was already stepping out of the car and her dress scrunched up against the leather seat as she moved to stand. Her thighs were visible and Dustin coughed making her aware of what had happened.

He was uncomfortable—in a good way—because of her body. The idea swept over her, and she was reminded of the heroines in her stories. Oh, what a fool she’d been. From the abstract to the practical. Now, that really was a leap.

If she wanted Dustin, she didn’t need to chase after his interest. He was all but tripping and falling over his desire.

Instead of pulling her dress down, she quickly surveyed the park and lake. They were alone. What she should have done years ago was not let go of him, not give in to her need to fit in and compromise. She’d let him go without a fight, believing she couldn’t win. Not tonight.

She lifted her leg onto the door frame, well aware of what she allowed him to glimpse. She wanted to see if he was indeed on the slippery slope of desire, this powerful man who she might have the means to possess.

Claire opened her thighs, slightly wider as he approached and his eyes went right to the inside of her legs. He raked both hands through his hair and she opened her legs a bit wider pushing her hips forward. There was no mistaking the bulge in his pants. What would he do? She’d learned how to write the erotic scenes but living it was something she’d never explored. He seemed to cave in whenever she bit her lip.

“Dustin.” She called his attention. “My eyes are up here.” Her voice was low. She tilted her head, sucked in her bottom lip and stopped with a light bite. Like magic he groaned.

“Don’t play games.” He voice was hoarse, and he returned his eyes to the inside of her legs. Did he like the light coral lingerie that she wore?

She felt herself go wet at the thought of his hands and mouth on her. Desire was a two-edged sword. Desire pulsed between her legs and deep inside her body. He hadn’t even touched her and she wanted him.

“I’m not. Dustin, where can we go?”

“Home. Sit back, or I swear I’ll pull you out of the car and take you right here.” His jaw muscles clenched and he set his mouth into a hard line.

At that moment, there be could be no bigger turn on than Dustin, a man who’d promised to take what he wanted if she didn’t obey. She almost thwarted his command but knew that having sex in an open park would not be the smartest move she’d made in recent days.

He got into the car and backed up quick enough to cause her head to lift off the neck rest. He raced home in record time and swung into his driveway. The engine turned off, keys jingled in his hand, and she didn’t know if she was really ready.

“We’re here.”

“Home sweet home.” She looked out of the window to the house.

This wasn’t a story. In real life feelings always wound through sex. Once begun, she wouldn’t have the strength to put her emotions back on the shelf. Her heart had been hurt before and now with Fran on the way home, if he still desired her sister. Fear tugged at her heart.

“Baby, I want you so much. I can’t pretend. But I don’t want to push you. If you’re not ready, I understand.”

“Are you sure about Fran?”

He closed his eyes. “I made a bad mistake and one that taught me not to be afraid to risk. The regret and lies that I kept silent about became barbed wire that tore and then locked up my heart. We have a second chance. You and me. It doesn’t have to begin tonight. But we can be happy together. Trust me.”

His eyes burned into her. He’d been the person she’d longed to feel next to her, without clothes and without the past. Nothing need keep them apart anymore. She trusted him within every part of her body. She trusted him with her heart.

“I trust you.”

“We’ll take it slow.” His intense gaze ignited her need to touch him. He got out of the car, his beautiful, masculine body graceful as he came for her.

Slow. Oh, boy, that’s not what she’d had in mind. She was on a trapeze, rushing faster and swinging higher. He opened her door and held out his hand. This clasp of palm against palm drew her to him.

Claire walked up the steps still holding his hand. He opened the front door and swept her up into his arms. He walked inside and kicked the door closed. Taking the stairs, two at a time, he reached the landing and turned down the hall. He walked into a room that no longer resembled the old master bedroom and set her down.

He’d renovated the upstairs, removing walls to enlarge the space. The ceiling had also been removed to reveal skylights and open beams. A large, king-size bed stood in the middle of the room. Dark mahogany furniture gleamed in the early evening light. She watched as he lit several candles, and they flickered on the nightstand. She half-smiled at his optimism.

His eyes followed hers. “I like to sleep with candlelight. It’s relaxing.”

He flipped on the stereo and soft music poured into the quiet air. “Would you like something to drink?”

“No.” She held out her arms.

Dustin took her hands, tugged them gently, making her come to him. He let go to tilt her chin as he’d done on the porch. “You’re the most captivating woman.”

He dipped his head and touched his mouth to her lips. He kissed her softly and then pushed his lips against her mouth, his tongue separating her lips. He kissed her deeply, and she wrapped her arms about his shoulders. She opened her mouth to him, exploring him with her tongue, searching and suckling. Finally she broke the kiss to trace her tongue over and along his jaw.

He groaned and recaptured her mouth. He kissed her deeply, possessively, thrusting his tongue into her mouth. She ran her hands over his shoulders and arms, over hardened muscles down to his waist. She pulled his shirt loose from his pants and slipped her hands underneath. The muscles along his abdomen rippled under her fingertips. She stopped at his chest and he tensed under her touch. She bit his lip and pressed herself into his body.

“You’re driving me crazy.” He reached for her hair and inhaled. He shifted his mouth to her neck and planted light kisses. Bursts of pleasure erupted within her body and only one thought raced through her mind. Tonight she’d finally make her fantasy a reality.

He moved his mouth over her shoulder and cupped her breast with his hand. He rubbed her nipple through the thin material of her dress and sent rivulets of pleasure along her skin. He reached around to her back and tugged on the zipper. He brought down the top of her dress and released her breasts from the clinging material. He tongued and licked the tip of her nipple that had hardened into a peak, tenderly rolling her flesh between his teeth. A tidal wave of pleasure and tension washed over her, demanding release.