Secret Worlds (317 page)

“Are you satisfied, Jiren?” I asked.

“Relena, don’t,” Blyl warned.

Jiren walked past, then stopped and turned his head toward me. He didn’t let his gaze rest fully on me. The smile on his face gave me the answer I needed. “One thing you should remember, I always win. One day, this realm will see I gave them a gift.”

“This isn’t over, Jiren. Marren is alive!”

“Oh, you have that right.” He paused long enough for the question to linger as to which point he agreed to. “This isn’t over. I will be back to finish the job. I won’t stop until you and that abomination is dead.”

“Leave, now,” Blyl spat toward Jiren.

“I’m sorry, Blyl. Marren’s not dead.” I quickly jabbed my elbow into his ribs and grabbed the hilt of his sword and pulled. I pushed him to the ground and went after Jiren, who ran as soon as he saw me take down Blyl. Something told me he let me do it. He believed me. I know he did.

I followed the aura of Jiren out of the mountain halls, running until my sides ached and my throat hurt. I had no idea where I had run to or what he was doing standing in the middle of a meadow, filled with grass and flowers that reached his waist. He slowly turned around and faced me.

“You are a sorry excuse for an existence,” I spat.

His chuckle floated on the air. “Maybe, but I never lose.”

“Fight me, and I’ll prove you wrong.”

Again he laughed. “Not yet, pup.”

“Fight me, coward!” I fought back tears.

“Be careful what you wish for,” he said and took a step closer to me. As he came into clearer view, he wasn’t himself, but Marren.

“Bastard!” I ran toward him, sword poised to run him through.

“Relena, wait!” Marren’s voice shot from his mouth, halting me. He had the perfect tone and pitch. Exactly like him. My heart thudded slightly then I realized it was all part of his trick, his useless scheme.

“You are a liar! What is so wrong with living on the mortal realm?”

“Relena, drop your sword. It’s me.” Jiren’s attempt to get me to drop my guard didn’t work this time, no matter how much he sounded and appeared like Marren.

“No, you are not my Marren.” My sword shook. I struggled to regain control.

“Relena, look at me. See me, I
am
Marren.”

“No, you aren’t,” I said, my voice carrying on the air.

“Relena, please! It truly is me!”

“If it really is you, what did you tell me the first night we were together?”

“Relena, please. This isn’t the time,” he worked harder, even taking on the resigned tone and stature Marren would when running thin on patience with me.

“Oh, I think this is the perfect time,” I said.

He sighed. “What part do you want?”

“Everything.”

“Relena,” I caught the falter in the image. Jiren was losing his hold. He was losing his patience.

“Your mind games aren’t going to work on me. You will never have the light Marren holds in his eyes. You will never have the warmth of his skin or the love in his touch. You will never gaze at me the way Marren does. Never. You are jealous of him, and you wanted to stop at nothing to show him just how much higher above him you are. Well, you will never amount to the person Marren is. Never in a thousand years or ages. You will always be less than him.”

I ran toward him, not willing to back down and convincing myself further he was Jiren not Marren. Just before I reached him something dark swooped up and snatched him from me. They disappeared beyond the line of trees bordering the meadow. I fell, thrusting the sword into the ground instead of Jiren’s heart, where I aimed.

***

I was brought back to the mountain and wasn’t punished for injuring Blyl. In fact, they expected Jiren would do something to make Marren appear dead as one last desperate attempt to dissuade the races and make them defect to his side.

Somehow, they still believed me. But for the sake of appearances, I had to remain in the room and wait. Either for Marren to come find me or for someone to find him. A group had been sent to search for him, but no sign of him has been found.

I begged for Enid and Danst to keep me company. The Ancients remained hesitant, not wanting to send the wrong impression to the races. I assured them, no one would know. I wanted them there to help keep me safe. Despite the argument they would have guards rotated, they decided Jiren could infiltrate the mountain and take on any form he desired. They eventually agreed.

The first night, Danst slept in the chair next to the bed, Enid stood up the entire night, and I slept in my bed. It wasn’t a restful sleep. I had horrible dreams Marren was stuck somewhere dark, inside a Tombcell that couldn’t be easily reached, and hidden away somewhere deep inside the forest beyond the mountains.

***

I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t sleep. Despair and loneliness were my only companions. The nightmares were my lovers at night.

Enid and Danst left to help find Marren. I tried to tell them I could be of use, but they refused to let me, concerned for the unborn child’s wellbeing. I knew they meant well, but it had been so long since I’d seen Marren, and I missed him like a part of me was missing. Six days passed, and I felt my grip on life slipping away…along with Marren’s.

I had grown accustomed to the four walls that surrounded me. The only hint of the passing days came from the one window overlooking the small courtyard where Marren’s people gathered to do dances and rituals customary of their ways. Lately, it was the beating of their drums and chanting voices that soothed me the most. They tried to find him, which brought me hope.

Sometimes their music sent me off to sleep, and I dreamt of peace and lush, green meadows with bright fragrant flowers, and a warm wind blowing through my hair gently. The ends would tickle my cheek and nose. But then, darkness would creep in, and Marren’s screams would surround me. He called out to me, begging me to find him. The wind blew colder and fiercer, the grass and flowers would wilt and crumble to ash. The ground would start to shake and break apart, forcing me to my knees. As the earth opened to swallow me whole, I desperately clung to a thick root sticking out of the side of the gorge. But it wasn’t able to support my weight. It gave, pulling free from its grip of the earth. I would then plummet into a dark abyss, only to wake up just before the darkness consumed me.

I had a plan to leave—sneak away if I had to. There was more to those dreams than just fears playing themselves out. Definitely more. I felt Marren in my head. I heard him, and I could almost touch him. Him! Like he lay in bed next to me or speaking to my mind with our private way of communicating. He called to me. I was the only one who could find him and bring him back safely.

Just as my determination set in, the door opened. Enid stormed through, hand on sword, in dire need of a bath. His eyes found mine, and I realized, he came for me.

“A’lainn, are you absolutely sure you can find Marren?”

I nodded.

“Very well, gather your things and meet me outside the doors. I think I know where to find him. If you can speak to him, as you told me before, I think we stand a chance to find him alive, yet!”

I nodded once more and started changing into traveling clothes. I had told Enid about our private way of speaking, using it to hold weight on my needing to help find him. He wasn’t at all surprised and explained he would see Marren and I become silent but acted like we still somehow communicated. He had knowledge of it happening in a few stories regarding heart songs, but he had yet to actually observe it. Of course, at the time, I was turned down immediately. But, he did promise to return if he got anything solid to follow.

It seemed I would have company after all.

***

Make that a small army

I stepped out the doors of the mountain and found a small group of werewolves, a few centaurs, and Ildir waiting for me along with Danst and Enid. I stared at Enid quizzically and stepped even slower out into the open.

“I’m sorry, A’lainn, I had no choice. They simply wouldn’t let you come along,” Enid said.

“Aye, that is true. A rare gift ye and Marren share. It’s one more notch in our belief in ye and one less in Jiren, which can’t bode well for him.” Ildir spoke with his hands resting limply over the blade of his axe. It had to weigh nearly the same amount he did, but he gripped its handle and laid it over his shoulder as though it was nothing more than a feather—a mere extension of himself.

“It’s okay. I understand you are just as desperate to find him as I am,” I said to Enid and then turned to Ildir. “I’m glad you are still on my side. It will make Marren very happy to know you continued to stand by me when he wasn’t around.”

“Well, all this talk is doing us nothing good in the way of finding him,” a woman’s voice spoke. It sounded familiar, but I couldn’t place it. I peeked around the group to find a woman, tall, lean and dark skinned. Some of her features remind me of Danst, but I didn’t need that comparison to know she belonged to the elven race. The most fascinating feature being her eyes. Crystal blue, like shards of ice when the light touched them and dark gray like storm clouds when the shadow graced them. Her hair was streaked with different colors, yet all dark brown.

“It must be the setting sun,” I told myself, low enough only I could hear.

“You’re right,” I said to the woman. “This isn’t going to find Marren any sooner. I would suggest keeping the pleasantries while on foot.”

The last light of the day had finally faded into the night sometime after we left the mountain village. We moved past the mountains further north, deep into the heart of a forest nestled against the foot of the sinking peaks of the earth. The night seemed to insist on carrying on forever, making the trek seem to last for days, despite our speed. I kept thinking eventually the light of day would start to brighten the sky above us, which remained riddled in an ink so thick not even the stars were visible. Instead, the night remained.

The night seemed to grow darker and darker, making the shadows blend into one another, despite my being able to see the auras of the living things around us. They grew dimmer, like their life was slowly zapped away into nothingness and eventually, they disappeared altogether. I had to stop.

“What is wrong?” Danst asked.

“I can’t see a thing.”

“What she means is there are no auras, no life.” Enid’s voice came from right behind me. He sounded strained, like he too was unnerved by the sudden and complete blackness that swallowed every ounce of light belonging to the auras. Even the moon’s light didn’t touch this dark place. My heart pounded within my chest, urging me cautiously forward.

“This is the forest of the dead,” Faun, the dark skinned and crystal blue-eyed elf spoke. “We shouldn’t remain still. We must push on.”

“My lady,” one of the other werewolves spoke, “It’s too dangerous.”

“We must find Marren,” I said and stretched out my hands, taking careful steps forward. “Form a line behind me and step only where I step.”

Relena…

I stopped in mid-step as my heart nearly leapt from my chest.

A chorus of voices sounded in my ears. “My lady…A’lainn, Relena…” all asking the reason for my sudden stop.

“Shh.” I held up my hand to halt further interruptions. I held my breath and waited for the beating of my heart to calm down enough so the pounding didn’t make any sound in my ears.

Relena, go back…

My heart leapt happily. A voice that made my heart soar.
Marren?

Go back…please!

Go back? How could I go back now?

I heard his voice, my heart’s reaction confirmed as much. I couldn’t turn back. Not now. Not when I was so close to finding him again. No. I couldn’t. I started to walk again, faster this time and less careful. My pace quickened as I let my heart control where to step. Faster and faster until I was sure I would find him at any moment. With each step, I told myself the next would be the one. I would set my hungry eyes on him then. Behind a tree, lying at its base, trying to regain strength from his own escape.

I found nothing but a seemingly endless forest, lacking life and hope, and a chill colder than death nipping at my skin. My heart fell. I had hoped I would find him. Hoped he would be alive and well so we could go back to the village and show the races Marren was okay, and that Jiren had only wanted to destroy all hope.

Yet, I sensed he was near. So close that I only needed to reach out to him and touch him. I forced the breaking of my heart to stop long enough for me to try one more thing.

Marren?

Silence.

Marren, please answer me! Please!

I tried to listen for his voice to return to me. I held my breath and forced my heart to stand still as the wind blew whispers through the trees above and around us. I knew the group stood behind me, taking me in, waiting for some sign for me to give them as a direction of where to go. I couldn’t move any farther. I couldn’t bear the weight of my own body. My knees gave out from underneath me, sending me to the ground, landing hard on a tree branch. The pain surged up my leg, creating a rage within me I couldn’t control. I started banging my fists on the ground, and I pulled up bushes and grass and punched the tree in front of me.

The tree gave way with a hollow crack, distilling my anger, replacing it with curiosity. I reached out and touched the tree, giving away under the gentle pressure of my touch. I pulled away the bark and found not only was the tree dead and hollow, but something lay inside. A body faintly covered in a thin pale blue-green aura. I pulled him out and laid him gently on the ground. We’d found Marren, but he barely clung to life.

“We need to get him to my people. He’s weak and will need our healing to keep him, and you, alive.”

I started at the sound of Faun’s voice. Shocked by how silent she was. Though her appearance was even more so. Her aura was yellow and dim.

“Relena, there’s no time to waste.”

I nodded and said, “Can you ask one of the centaurs if he can ride on their back?”