Secret Worlds (323 page)

***

I stood at the entrance to the Circle of Gathering. A place where Marren’s, and soon my, people gather to celebrate, mourn, pray, and even prepare for battle. It is a place of immense importance for the race of therianthropes. A sacred and special place.

It was formed at the foot of the mountain under Marren’s window. It was in a perfectly shaped circle and cleared of everything except a few toppled over tree trunks for benches, stumps for stools, and a large fire pit at the center. Lush green grass covered the ground in soft spikes, only fading as it neared the fire pit, which was blazing with heat and life at that very moment.

All types of races showed for the ceremony. Many of the werewolves dressed in strange and colorful garb, dancing in rhythmic ways around the fire, with beating drums and the sounds of other instruments. The songs they were lifting and beautiful. It came as a surprise to realize only a few people actually sang, though it sounded as if everyone had joined in. Absolutely enchanting.

I found the one directing the ceremony and it struck me hard, the feeling and pull within my heart from the missing piece of my life. I tried to not think of Danst and the gaping hole he left. He was supposed to be the one to oversee this. My heart sagged as a tear snuck down my cheek. I quickly wiped it away and took a deep breath.

Then my eyes found his. The deep black orbs that reflected everything—never failing to absorb all within them. He seemed almost worried, but when his eyes found mine, my lips pulled into a wide grin. He met mine with his own brighter-than-the-sun-smile that nearly stops my heart every time I see it, even in wolf form. He matched me in the way that he wore white leather. His hair was also pulled back and braided with beads and white leather laces. The designs on his vest, pants and boots were far more detailed and intricate than I could ever describe. The blend of bright colors, blues, reds, yellows, and greens made it difficult to discern one from the other. I’m sure it was a special symbolic thing for him, even though he could’ve gone naked, and I would think he was the most beautiful creature in the world.

The music changed, and I was drawn out from within the sheltering trees toward the center of the circle—toward Marren. He met me halfway, taking my hands into his. His eyes were filled with love and the distracting reflection of the fire. I couldn’t help the blush that came to my cheeks. Marren lifted the back of his fingers, gently brushing away the rush of heat from them and causing all sorts of flux emotions within me. After tucking my hand into the crook of his arm, he led me to the other side of the fire, under the window to our room.

The man in charge spoke a prayer in his native language. The enchanting words danced around me as Marren explained that it was a prayer of blessing, symbolic of a lasting love and bond that would withstand the test of time, even death. Because that was the way of true love. He did another blessing over the rest of the crowd as he walked around and moved his hands in an up and down motion. I turned back around as our hands were lifted and tied together with a white cloth that was soft as silk and reflected the orange-yellow glow of the fire behind us, shattering it into beams and tiny balls of light. When the man returned to us, he smiled and bowed his head.

A woman approached with an oddly shaped leather flask with two spouts. The man directing the ceremony took the flask and said something in his native tongue. Marren moved our bound hands toward it. I helped him grab the odd contraption, bringing it forward to hold in between us.

Drink,
he whispered to my mind.

It was awkward but sweet in gesture at the same time. When the last drop was done and the flask lowered, a loud silence fell around us. We were beckoned forward then, and a blanket was placed over our shoulders. The man presiding turned his attention to Marren and gestured to him. Marren faced me and grabbed a hold of my other hand. He leaned in, lowered his lips to mine and filled me with such joy and love. I wasn’t sure on whether to laugh, cry, or kiss him back. I decided on the latter, stepping closer to him as the hoots and hollers of all the races filled the air.

He pulled away from me slightly and rubbed my upper arm with his free hand. “We did it!”

I smiled. “Yes. Yes, we did.”

The rest of the night was spent dancing, eating, and having fun. Marren sat with me while we watched all of the rhythmic dances that circled the fire, not moving from our spot until only bright red coals were noticeable. The loud, roaring, commotion had dulled out to a quiet hum as the night grew late and many of the guests left. A bucket of water was poured over the coals, dousing them with a loud hiss and plume of smoke that headed straight for me.

“Uh-oh,” one of the dancers had commented.

“What?” I asked full of alarm.

“You realize what that means…” It was a statement more than a question.

I shifted my gaze to Marren, who chuckled to himself then said, “When smoke travels to a pregnant woman, no matter what the reason, she’ll have an easy birth, and it will happen on a full moon.”

“Well, it isn’t going to be this full moon. It’s too early still,” I argued.

“It isn’t specific.” It was Okelo who walked up to us with Serid on her hips.

“It is so amazing how much this boy grows when you are not paying attention,” I said.

“I know. Soon, we’ll be going through his rite.” As she spoke the words, a flash of sadness crossed her eyes, making me believe she thought about her lost love. I was almost filled with guilt for having saved mine, but she never seemed to mind and was thrilled to be in charge of arranging our ceremony. She shook the sadness from her eyes and said, “At least we have a good idea of a time. Helps us to prepare for the big event!”

“But I thought you said it wasn’t specific?”

“Well, you aren’t going for longer than another month! Otherwise, you’d be carrying for too long,” Okelo said. I gulped. She smiled with a slight bow of her head. “My master and lady, I bid thee a good evening.”

“Thank you, Okelo,” Marren spoke. He sounded at peace, and for once, Jiren wasn’t on his mind.

Once she left, I stared at Marren and dropped my eyes down to our hands. “How do we get these off?”

“I take them off…with my teeth.”

I couldn’t help the giggle that escaped me. He chuckled along with me. Our hearts dancing to the song of our joy. On that night, there was only us, together, with no one else on our minds but each other.

***

The next month wasn’t spent in peaceful splendor. Marren made extra effort to keep himself busy, but he continued to use our private way of communicating. He remained on edge about everything. Jiren hadn’t made an appearance yet, and that made it worse. I tried to comfort him as best I could, but he wouldn’t stop worrying about the baby. Nor would he tell me why.

All of the races had come together to form groups of Watchmen to actively patrol parts of the immortal realm in search of any sign of Jiren or his whereabouts. The mountain village was well guarded, especially my room. And I never spent a moment alone.

Okelo had spent every waking moment with me, along with Serid, who had grown to the size of a toddler. He spoke in full sentences in common and his native language, and he play-fought Enid in my room with wooden swords. Enid stood on his knees with one hand behind his back, gripping his belt. The giggles that emerged from that small child could shake Jiren from his seat. Not that I would want to find out. The kid just had that kind of power.

I enjoyed the playfulness of the two, especially since being confined to my bed for the previous week. Horrid cramps, that would give changing a run for the money, would rip through my stomach and last for what seemed like hours when only minutes passed. And the baby had grown to a point where anytime it moved, it would hurt. Okelo insisted that I remain in bed for the remainder of the pregnancy. I was getting too close. But, the next full moon wasn’t for another two days, which I took every chance to remind Okelo of.

“That was only a saying, you could go into labor within the next day,” she would always say.

This time was no different.

“Besides,” she added as an afterthought, “The baby’s movements have slowed. That is a sure sign of birth.”

I tried to ignore the way that anticipating the amount of pain that I would go through made my body react. Like being constricted in tightly bound rope or being held underwater with no hope of air.

Enid, having lost his battle against the Great Serid, approached to give me whatever news he could. He had been bombarded by Serid the moment he walked through the door and begged for a practice fight before he talked to me.

“How are you holding up?” His eyes were filled with the concern of a father.

“I’m well, Athair. How are things in the outside world?” The outside world was everything outside the door to my room.

“They found evidence of tracks just on the northern side of the dwarf’s territory. No one knows if they belong to Jiren or his followers.”

“If he has any left. I hear they’re coming in at a slow trickle if they make it alive.”

“It is true that Jiren’s followers seem to be dwindling. As word of what you and Marren proved to the rest of the Ancients travels through the remaining territories, more and more decided to leave his lead. Though, none were helpful in revealing the details of his plans.”

I tried to pay attention to what Enid discussed with me through the tapping of a wooden sword against the stone of the open window. I kept thinking something sat on the verge of my thoughts, inching closer with every tap. Okelo snapped something in the native language and stomped over to scold Serid, who appeared like he had just lost his favorite toy in the world.

Okelo scooped him into her arms then turned toward me with a smile. “I’m taking Serid to our room. I will return when he’s asleep to check on you again.”

I nodded as she stomped with frustration out of the room. “Something is bothering her. Marren too, but they’re not telling me. Do you have any thoughts on it, Enid?”

I gazed deep into his blue eyes. He sighed, walking away from the side of my bed.

“I’m afraid I do not, A’lainn.”

I raised an eyebrow to his back. “I will find out eventually. I’m just concerned. He’s been so wound up the last couple of days. He’s barely said anything to me, and although I understand the ways of his people, I still don’t understand why he won’t at least peek in on me.”

“I wish I could tell you, but even I am not privy to such things.”

I was compelled to stretch, reaching my arms way above my head and curving my back just slightly. Instead of it feeling like it normally would, it seemed as though a sword sliced through my stomach. I let out a howling scream, falling back against the bed and clawing the pillow in my tightened fists. The baby moved within me, sending another sharp slice. I laid there, writhing in pain while Enid shouted something about getting help and disappearing into the hall.

One last slice of fire burned through my abdomen, followed by a huge warm gush of liquid pouring from in between my legs. It soaked the bedding and my gown, forcing them to stick to my legs. I reached down to feel what it was, only to bring my fingers back into view tinged with blood.

Marren! The baby!
I tried to put as much desperation into my unspoken words as I could. Within the time it took me to endure another agonizing cramp, he was at my feet, pulling the blankets from my legs and lifting the bottom of my gown over my bent knees.

His eyes never touched mine. He kept them on everything but my eyes. I was scared and unsure of what was happening.

“Push,” he told me with a sense of urgency.

I inhaled a deep breath and pushed with all my might, grunting through the burning pain.

“Again.”

I pushed again, this time being torn from the inside out. A dark rim lined my vision, causing everything to blur.

“Relena?” Marren called out, but it sounded as though he stood on the other side of a cavern—much farther away than just in front of me. Then, just before the blackness took over my vision completely, his blurred mouth moved, but no sound came out.

***

I drifted in a dream. Weightless and floating in a black sea. I could hear things in the distance. Things that I couldn’t make out completely, but they were shouts of people. One voice stuck out to me. Marren’s voice. Shouting things I couldn’t understand. He sounded pained? Angry? I couldn’t tell. His voice was so far in the distance.

I wanted to get closer to him. I needed to comfort him. To help him with what he needed.

What made him so upset?

Something tugged at my memory, begging me to remember. Something that seemed like I should remember but couldn’t. Something important.

“She’s dying!” A loud voice echoed through my darkness. It caused my heart to palpitate.

“Who’s dying?” I asked.

No response.

“No!” Marren’s voice echoed all around me.

I had to remember. I had to find out what I’d forgotten. I had to find my way back to Marren.

A pain seared through me on my lower abdomen. I placed my hand over the opened wound and held it up to my eyes. Blood. A familiar sight, and despite the lack of light I viewed myself so clearly. So many times I had been graced with the sight of my own blood. So much of it had been spilled over my years. If it weren’t for Danst…Wait. Danst…Danst is…dead.

That realization sparked a small light in front of me. A tiny flame that flickered and moved within the shadows. I remembered Danst had died helping fight off Jiren’s forces. Something else played out in my mind: the night he yelled at me. The night before he died.

“I hate to break this to you, but Jiren can’t be killed. Not in the way you are thinking.”

“Oh yeah? How can I kill him?” I asked, stepping up to Danst and staring deep into his eyes, waiting for him to answer. He avoided my gaze and turned, walking away. “Don’t walk away from me, tell me!”

“I can’t,” he said.

“You can’t or you won’t?” I shouted.

He turned around faster than I’d ever seen him move with rage blazing brightly in his eyes. “Pick one, Relena! You’ll stop at nothing and run over everyone—even your mate—to get to Jiren and kill him. You won’t think! At least not about anyone but yourself. Go do yourself a favor and get some rest. And try not to get yourself and your baby killed.”