Seduction (The Journal of the Wolves of Spruce Hollow) (33 page)

And how did I feel?
I had no idea.
My head was fucked up and full of conflicting thoughts and feelings. What I really needed was some time to sit and to digest this information.
 

I was definitely looking forward to going out with Caver and Griff tonight, I needed a beer to calm my nerves.
 

Holy shit,
I was going to be a father.
 

It was hard to wrap my head around the fact that Aspen and I would soon be parents to a helpless little baby.
How in the hell were we going to do that?
We were newly mated and weren’t even married yet.
 

Would that matter to her?
 

It didn’t matter to me, but Aspen was a new Were and therefore was more “human” than not. And from what I understood, humans put a lot of stock and meaning into marriage. It wasn’t important at all in the Were world.
 

I mean, Aspen and I were already mates, chosen by Fate, and blood bound on top of that. How much more commitment could you possibly want from someone?

In my eyes, what we had was much
more
significant than a marriage certificate ever could be. We were
more
than married. A marriage certificate was just a petty piece of paper.
 

I mean, humans got married
and divorced
all the time. But being blood bound to someone existed on a completely different plane than marriage did.
 

Being blood bound to Aspen was an emotional connection. We were, literally, part of one another and it was intensely physical, emotional and sexual.

Baby….Baby….Baby.

The word clanged in my head over and over again as I drove home.
 

Oh my god,
Aspen was going to have a baby and I was absolutely terrified. How was I even supposed to hold a tiny baby without hurting it? I was a pretty big guy. I wasn’t built to hold and cradle a tiny, delicate newborn. I was hard muscle, bone and sinew. A baby was soft and fragile.

Fuck.

My mind was a maelstrom with the disjointed feelings racing through my consciousness. It was so distracting that I suddenly found myself already parked in the driveway…at home. I was so preoccupied and caught up in my own thoughts that I couldn’t even remember the drive here.
 

Aspen, my blissfully ignorant
baby mama
, was lying on the couch, watching a movie. She had her favorite pink blanket from her bed wrapped around her.
 

The mother of my unborn child had a favorite blanket.
God, she was no more than a child herself. How could I have been so stupid and let this happen? She heard me come in and poked her curly little head up over the couch, her eyes seeking me out.
 

“Hi Roan,” she smiled at me, “do you want to watch a movie with me?”
 

I smiled back at her, I couldn’t help it, it was an automatic response. If Aspen was happy, then Roan was happy…well on the outside, at least. Inside, I was a disordered mess of conflicted emotions. But Aspen was the light of my life and the sight of her animated, happy little face undid me.

“Okay, little girl, what are you watching?” I said as I sat down at the end of the couch by her feet. She immediately came over, sat down next to me and laid her head against my shoulder.
 

Cautiously, I leaned in and sniffed her.
 

The unusual smell was still there and was slightly stronger this time around.
The scent of our growing child in her belly
. I stiffened slightly but Aspen didn’t notice. Instead, she pushed against me, got up and straddled me on the couch.
 

Now normally, I would have been thinking
“Mmmm, come here and sit on my lap little girl”
. But under the circumstances and the incredible strain I was under, I really didn’t like where this was heading.
 

I could feel the heat at her core fitting snugly against my crotch and my cock instantly sprang to life and started to get hard. This was what had gotten us into this mess in the first damn place but my restraint was barely hanging by a thread.

I had terrible self control where Aspen was concerned and the fact that she was now wantonly grinding herself into my crotch with her head thrown back and her throat exposed didn’t help matters any. I could smell her desire for me as it floated on the air and wrapped itself around me, begging and urging me to act.
 

When she got up and slipped off her fluffy pink pajama pants, all bets were off. That little internal voice that kept telling me to put an end to this little interlude died a quick and painless death as Aspen stood in front of me wearing tiny, barely there, silky white panties.

Fuck!

I pulled her towards me as she unzipped the zipper on my jeans in that rough and quick “I want you inside me
now
” manner that typically claimed her whenever we fooled around.
 

I growled deep in my chest as I lifted my hips off the couch and she quickly yanked my jeans down to free my hard cock. There was nothing tender or gentle in her touch. She was already deep in the clutches of dark desire. The animal had already claimed her.

Looking into her wild eyes, feral desire suddenly filled me. God, I wanted her so badly.
Mine.
She was all mine and the fact that she was carrying my child inside her, filled me with a smug sense of proof of my male virility.
 

Gone were the worries and concerns of my human brain. There wasn’t any civilized reasoning to be found inside my consciousness right now. There was only the need to fill my mate and mark her over and over again as mine.
 

Aspen knelt between my legs and put her pouty little lips around the head of my cock. I watched with intense interest as she sucked me up and down, her tongue swirling around my throbbing shaft.
 

She may have been a virgin with very little practical experience with men when we first mated but she more than made up for her lack of skill with frank enthusiasm and her desire to please me.

Sexually, she was a wet dream come true and no erotic fantasy that I’d ever had about her over the years had ever come close to the sheer intensity and raw eroticism of being with her in real life.
 

Our eyes locked as she worked me up and down in her mouth and the way she held my gaze as she sucked me, made the sensation even more intense.

“Are you trying to make me come in your mouth?” I asked her playfully as I toyed with her hair. She smiled around my cock, the mischievous look in her eyes telling me the answer.

My balls felt heavy and started to ache as she continued to lick and suck me. I wanted to come so badly but held back as the desire to be buried deep inside her while I came was overwhelmingly strong. I suspected that my wolf and my Were biology were both responsible for that desire as the drive to mate and procreate
was
deeply ingrained in my wolf.
 

“
Dude, she’s already pregnant. You can stop influencing me.”
I said silently to my wolf.

Mercifully, her mouth was suddenly gone and I whispered a silent prayer of thanks as she climbed back on top of me. I leaned back against the couch and watched, my eyes were transfixed on the apex of our joining.
 

Aspen wantonly sunk herself down on my rock hard erection and let out a grunting moan of pleasure as I filled her. She was so tight and wet around my cock. I grabbed her hips and forced her to grind down tightly against me so I could feel her clench all the way around me as I impaled her.
 

Aspen’s face was flushed with heat and she was already whimpering with need as I lifted her and then pounded her back down onto my cock. I knew that she would not last long while I fucked her so deeply and the knowledge filled me with a perverse sense of pleasure that I could affect her so.
 

My eyes were smoldering dark blue pools of desire as I yanked her t-shirt up over her head and threw it on the floor. I wanted to touch her breasts while I throbbed painfully inside my mate.
 

“What a dirty girl you are, letting me fuck you on the couch like this where anyone could just walk in and see us. You’re a dirty little girl, Aspen.”
 

Telling Aspen that she was a dirty girl during sex, always seemed to flick a switch in her head. She started to growl as her perky breasts bounced up and down as we fucked. She wanted our joining as much as I did, I could sense it as she leaned forward and started biting the corded muscles where my neck met my shoulder.
 

“Easy, dirty girl, you don’t need to rip my neck open to show me that you want me. I know you’re excited, I’m excited too,” I whispered quietly into her ear as I tangled my hands in her hair and held her head still.
 

She settled immediately and started biting me more gently, her mouth and teeth nipping and licking as she went.
 

“Good girl,” I growled as I ran my hands down to her waist. My hands bit into her soft curves as I forced her down onto me and held her there.
 

“Move your hips in little circles, baby” I didn’t want to come too quickly as I was good and worked up from her sucking me.
Fuck, what my mate did to me.
I would never admit it, but she was the boss in our relationship because I would do anything to have her love me and to be able to keep fucking this pussy.

Soon Aspen was growling too, her body tight with need around my cock.
 

“Squeeze me, squeeze my cock, dirty girl,” I panted as I grabbed her ass and encouraged her to grind herself against me. She was so tight, I could barely stand the intensity of having her wrapped so firmly around me. Having sex with Aspen was like nothing I’d ever experienced before. I could feel every single inch of my cock throbbing inside her wet heat.
 

 
Our bodies were slick with the sweat of our efforts as her hard pebbly nipples grazed against my chest. “Oh god, Roan,” she moaned as I grabbed her around the waist and started lifting her and pounding her back down onto me forcefully until her body started quivering.
 

“Oh, you’re going to come for me, aren’t you, dirty girl? Look at me baby, look at me while you come on my cock.”
 

Watching her come and hearing her whimper, while she looked me in the eye was an intensely sexual and emotional bonding experience. Seeing her in such a vulnerable state made me feel profoundly connected to her in that moment. The connection was so intense that it pushed me over the edge and I threw my head back as I started to come inside her.
 

“Oh no, I don’t think so. Look at me Roan,” she said as her pussy pulsed with little quivering aftershocks around my cock. She held my head as I came and forced me to look at her. It was like staring into the sun. The emotional intensity was overwhelming.

God, she was absolutely everything to me.
 

We fell asleep together on the couch, me on my back with her half on top, half beside me.
 

As I glanced down at her softly sleeping form, I began to feel the fear and confusion creep in again. Aspen made me feel out of sorts and a little out of control.

It was because of my growing love for her.
It was an intense, obsessive feeling that I wasn’t used to and I suspected that it would get even worse as our baby grew larger in her belly.
 

Fuck
. Ever since Aspen had returned to Spruce Hollow, she’d turned my perfectly ordered life completely upside down.
 

But, it was too late. There was nothing I could do about it now. I was caught in her web. I couldn’t resist her now that we were mated, not even if I’d wanted to.
 

I looked down at her sleeping face and sighed. Her features were so delicate with wild strawberry blonde curls framing her face and tumbling down her back. I kissed the top of her head and briefly wondered what our baby would look like. Would it be light skinned and fair haired like her or honey skinned and dark haired like me? We both had light colored eyes, so chances are it would have light eyes too.
 

I still couldn’t believe that I had made a baby with Aspen.
 

It was surreal.
 

She was pregnant right this minute as she slept peacefully on my chest. I could feel the anxiety creep back into my head as thoughts of the baby rushed to the forefront of my mind.
 

I mean, it wasn’t just the two of us lying here on the couch. There was a tiny someone sleeping in between us.
 

Jesus, how could I possibly be a good father? I wasn’t even that great as a mate.
 

 
Fuck, I needed a beer.
 

Badly.

Chapter 37

~Aspen~

I woke up on the couch, alone, with my favorite blanket carefully tucked around me. It made me smile that Roan would be so thoughtful. He really loved me, I felt it deep down in my bones. He didn’t say it very often, but he didn’t have to.