See You at Harry's (9 page)

“As I was saying,” Sara goes on, “I don’t understand why you can’t just use Charlie’s photo, Dad. Like the one on the truck.”

“This is a
family
restaurant, Sara.
Family.
I want us all to take part. We’re a team!”

“I thought team members got a say in their strategy,” she says.

“Think of me as the team captain. The team captain knows what’s best.”

Oh, brother. I continue to drown all of my lima beans and wait for Sara to give a good comeback, but then Holden walks through the front door.

“Sorry I’m late!” he says cheerfully, and disappears into the kitchen. He returns with a huge pile of mashed potatoes on his plate.

“Why are
you
in such a good mood?” Sara asks.

“None of your business,” he says, cramming his mouth full of potato. “Mmm, Mom. These are fantastic.”

“Well, you won’t be so happy when you find out what Dad’s been up to,” Sara says.

Holden stops chewing.

“Oh, Sara, don’t be so dramatic,” my mom says.

“Dad’s putting our picture on ice-cream cartons that are going to be for sale in all the grocery and convenience stores,” I tell Holden. “Our picture from the
commercial.
”

Holden practically chokes on his potatoes.
“Why?”

“That’s what I said!’ Sara agrees. “I’m eighteen. That means I have to give my permission for anyone to use my image. Right, Mom? I mean, legally? Fern, Holden, and Charlie are minors, so you have to make the decision whether or not you want to exploit them, but you can’t exploit me!”

“What’s essploit?” Charlie asks.

“Daddy’s not exploiting anyone,” my mom says.

“That’s exactly what he’s doing! Doesn’t he realize how
bad
we all look? I mean, give me a break! At least if he wants to use us, let us retake the photo so we look halfway decent.”

“Am I not sitting at this table?” my dad asks.

“Why can’t you just use the picture of Charlie that’s on the truck?” Holden asks him.

“See?” Sara asks. “Charlie’s the perfect solution.”

Charlie blows a raspberry at her. I’m sure he would’ve wiggled his bum, too, if he wasn’t trapped in his high chair.

“Fern,” my dad says, “you’ve been pretty quiet about all of this. How do you feel?”

Everyone looks at me, as if they just now realize I am sitting at the table, even though I spoke six seconds ago.

My mom eyes my butter pond with disgust.

“I like the Charlie idea,” I say. “No offense, but we looked pretty lame in that ad. Sorry, Dad.”

He shakes his head. “What is happening to this family? What happened to our team?”

“Go, team!” Charlie yells.

“Maybe we should vote,” my mom suggests.

My dad’s face is getting redder by the minute. I feel bad for disappointing him, but when I picture our hideous family photo in the freezer of every convenience and grocery store in town, I can’t bring myself to take his side.

“Never mind.” My dad gets up and clears his plate. My mom follows.

“Down!” Charlie says.

Sara pushes his high chair back, and he slides out and runs toward the kitchen after my parents.

“You could have been a little nicer,” I say.

“It was the only way to make him listen, Fern. Dad just goes too far. All he cares about is the business.”

“Even so,” I say. I pick up my plate and head to the kitchen, too.

The thing is, my dad is the kind of person who gets carried away. When he thinks he has a good idea, there’s just no stopping him. We all know he doesn’t only care about the business. But sometimes . . . yeah. Sometimes it does sort of feel that way.

T
HE NEXT DAY
, Sara gets up and drives us to school without being asked. Ran is waiting for me at my locker as usual. Cassie sees us from a few lockers down and comes rushing over. “Hey, guys,” she says. “Great shirt.”

Ran’s shirt is hot pink and says
GO WITH THE FLOW
.

“Thank you,” he says.

For some reason, none of us has anything else to say, so we start to walk toward homeroom. We’re almost there when I see the Things headed our way.

“Uh-oh,” I say. I move closer to Ran.

“Hey, Hildy,” one of them says. “Is this your boyfriend?”

Ran stops in the middle of the hall to face them. People bump into us, but gradually the traffic swerves around us. Cassie looks like she wants to crawl into a locker. I would like to join her.

“Nice shirt,” Thing One says to Ran in his stupid “gay” voice.

“Thanks,” Ran says. He is so calm and cool.

“Excuse us.” I take Ran’s arm and start to lead him away.

Shockingly, the Things step aside, and the three of us walk on.

“See you at Hawee’s!” they call after us. But this time, I don’t cringe. Ran, Cassie, and I look at each other and crack up. Somehow, with Ran around, stuff like that just seems so stupid.

“What losers,” Cassie says, laughing.

Ran gets a weird look on his face but doesn’t say anything. I’m sure he would like to, but he has a thing about negativity. He’s always trying to figure out
why
people act like jerks instead of just letting them be jerks. I’m sure it’s something his parents used to have him do when he was still getting bullied. “Sometimes if you make up a really sad story for them, it’s easier not to take them being mean to you so personally,” he told me once.

When Cassie realizes Ran isn’t going to agree with her, she blushes. I feel sorry for her because I know she’s going to kick herself again for saying the wrong thing. I wish she would just take the hint that maybe if she is always saying things Ran doesn’t like, they wouldn’t make the best couple in the world. Besides, why can’t we just all stay friends? Them being a couple would ruin everything. And I don’t think that because I think maybe Ran and I could be . . . well, never mind. It just would.

“They seem pretty secure to me,” I say, hoping to make Cassie feel a little better.

“Looks can be deceiving,” Ran says.

Well, he would know.

After school, Holden waves to me, and I follow him to the curb, where we wait for Gray. Ran walks over to us and asks if he can come, too. Holden shrugs. When Gray pulls up, we climb in.

“Who’s the new guy?” Gray asks.

“This is my friend Ran,” I tell him.

“Cool.” He turns up the music, and Ran and I lean back in our seats. Once we’re on the road, Gray reaches over and takes Holden’s hand as if it is the most natural thing in the world. They start singing to the song on the radio at the top of their lungs. It’s like they’re friends and boyfriends at the same time. It’s the first time I’ve seen Holden look so happy. So comfortable. It’s like he’s a whole new person. I wish he could always be like this. Who he really is.

When Gray drops us off, Ran and I stand in front of the restaurant. “Gray seems nice,” Ran says. “They make a good couple.” That’s Ran. I knew it wouldn’t faze him a bit to see Holden hold hands with a guy. “But he does seem kind of old, doesn’t he? How old do you think he is?”

“I don’t know,” I say. I’m surprised Ran even cares. He never cares about stuff like that.

The door opens and Charlie comes tearing out at top speed. He flies right into Ran’s open arms. Ran lifts him in the air and almost falls over.

“I love you, Wan!” Charlie giggles.

“Nice to see you, too,” I say.

Charlie gives me a bashful look. “Hi, Ferny.”

He takes Ran’s hand and leads us inside. There are a few customers, but mostly the restaurant is pretty dead. Ran and I try to do our homework, but Charlie keeps interrupting us.

“Where’re Mom and Sara?” I ask, noticing for the first time that Mona is the only one taking orders.

Charlie makes a meditation pose.

“Again?” I ask.

He nods.

“What about Sara?”

“Helping Gil.” He crawls into Ran’s lap and starts to inspect his ear.

“Since when does Sara help Gil?”

Charlie just shrugs.

When my mom finally comes down, she heads straight to a table in the back with the big silverware bin and starts wrapping sets of forks, knives, and spoons in napkins for dinner prep. Charlie runs over to help. She giggles with him, and they chatter away as they stack the bundles into a fort around Doll, who sits on the table with her green dreadlocks and shocked expression. When I was Charlie’s age, my mom never talked to me like that. I spent most of my time making my own forts under the tables with Holden. I guess the two of us have always needed our hideouts. Even when we were little.

After what feels like hours, it’s finally time to go home. My mom scoops Charlie up and squeezes him tight. “Ran, do you have any dinner plans?” she asks.

Ran smiles. “Actually, my dad’s working late.”

“Come on home with us, then,” she says.

At dinner my mom tells us that my dad is at some special meeting, and she does
not
want to talk about it. I’m sure it’s about the stupid ice-cream labels.

Dinner is vegetarian shepherd’s pie. The fake meat is chewy and weird, and the only one who seems to like it is Ran.

“So, tell us about Gray,” Sara says to Holden. “What’s he like, anyway?”

“None of your business,” Holden says.

“Who’s Gray?” my mom asks.

Sara smiles. “Holden’s new friend.”

“Oh?”

Holden flashes my sister a warning look. “Yeah,” he tells my mom.

“He’s nice,” I say.

“Fern and I were wondering how old he is,” Ran says. I kick him under the table, and he looks at me like he genuinely doesn’t know why. “I was just wondering,” he adds quietly. “Because he seemed kind of old.”

“Old?” my mom asks.

“He’s in high school like me,” Holden says. “Jeez, Ran.”

“What?”

“Never mind.”

“What grade?” my mom asks.

“Senior,” Holden mumbles toward his plate.

“A
senior
?”

“Wow!” Sara says. “An older man.”

I picture Gray and Holden holding hands. “He’s really nice,” I say again. “He doesn’t seem that old to me.”

“Is he from Union? Maybe I know him,” Sara says. “I mean, since I’m only a year older than him.”

“You don’t know him. He’s from the Academy,” Holden says.

“The Academy? Really? How did you meet?” my mom asks.

Ran’s head flips back and forth between each family member as if he’s watching a tennis match.

“What is this, the third degree?” Holden asks. “It’s none of your business!”

“I’m only your mother.”

“And this is my life, not yours! We’re not a show!” Holden picks up his plate and storms out of the dining room.

My mom sighs in her usual way. Like she’s disappointed and frustrated but it’s best to let him go. She’s always just letting him run off. Just once I would like to see her go after him and hug him like she hugs Charlie every five minutes. Just once I would like her to hug
me.

“He’s so sensitive,” Sara says.

“Are they boyfriends?” my mom whispers.

“Why don’t you ask him?” I say. I remember what Sara told me, about how Holden needs to be the one to tell us he’s gay. But maybe he could use some help. Maybe if my mom would just try to talk with him, he’d open up. But instead of responding, she starts to clear the table.

Ran thanks her for dinner, and I walk him outside while we wait for his mom to come pick him up.

“That was an interesting dinner,” he says.

“I can think of a better word for it.”

“Like what?”

“Sucky?”

“That’s not a word.”

I elbow him. “I just wish my mom weren’t
so
laid-back, you know? I wish she’d talk to him.”

“Maybe she’s afraid of what he’ll say.”

“Well, yeah. But the thing is, I don’t get what she’s so afraid of.”

His mom pulls into the driveway. “Don’t worry,” he tells me before he gets into the car. “All will be well.”

I wish I could believe it.

Later, as I head toward my room to escape having to play Connect Four with Charlie, I pass by Holden’s bedroom door and hear him talking to someone.

“I could come see you now,” he says. “Yeah. I’ll just sneak out. No problem. My family is totally clueless.”

Slowly, I inch closer to his doorway. He’s lying on his back, knees bent, on top of his perfectly made bed. “You could come pick me up. I could meet you at the end of the street. . . . I know. I’ll get my license next year.”

That is a total lie, since Holden is only fourteen.

I hear Sara coming up the stairs and hurry to my room. I shut the door and lie on my bed, staring at my slanted ceiling where I picked the wallpaper when I was little. Holden’s voice sounded so pleading. So different from today in the car. He sounded like he wanted to escape from us so badly.

My family is totally clueless.

Not all of us are,
I think.
We love you. You’re the one who’s too clueless to notice.