Seeking Pack Redemption (17 page)

“No,
it—”

“It’s
okay. You don’t have to say anything. I know that was a bitchy thing to say. I
should be grateful you and your friends saved me. And I’m sure I’ll be fine,
it’s just so overwhelming right now.”

“It
doesn’t have to be. Things will work out.”

“You can’t
promise that,” she replied with a sad smile.

“Actually,
I can. This is what’s going to happen. You will come back with me when this is
all done. You’ll live in my house, and I’ll take care of you.” Once again, he
spoke and had no idea who the fuck the sensitive guy was who was putting words
in his mouth. Worse, they felt right, and it shocked him to realize he meant
them.

“I wasn’t
asking for your pity.”

“I wasn’t
giving you any. You’re carrying all that’s left of my family.” He couldn’t
resist sliding his hand between their bodies to palm her rounded tummy. “I’ll
care for you both because I want to.”
Need
to.
Protect the pup and the female,
his
wolf answered in total agreement.

“I doubt
your wife or girlfriend will like that.”

“I’m
single.”

“For now.
But what about later?
Kind of hard to date with a woman and
kid under your roof cramping your style.”

“Maybe
I’ve already found what I want.” His earlier pep talk to himself about
leftovers fled, along with all other logical excuses as to why
Thea
was wrong for him.
I’ve
known her only a few days.
But it felt like he’d been waiting for her to
arrive forever.
She belonged to David.
And
he’d betrayed her, didn’t deserve her.
It’s
too soon.
It couldn’t happen soon enough.

Every
argument his mind came up with, his mind also shot down. Unable to resist, he
kissed her, and all he could think was,
she
tastes so damned right.

*
* * *

A sane
woman would have pushed him away. Slapped him. Kicked him in the nuts. But
Thea
lost her sanity a while ago during her captivity. All
she knew was when she woke cradled in Trent’s arms, she felt safe. Unafraid.
Even as she recounted her experience, she didn’t tremble or cry, his soothing
presence making it easy for her to unburden herself. He listened and though
David was his brother, he didn’t excuse his behavior. He condemned it. Trent
took her side and, despite everything that happened to her, it went a long way
to easing her inner pain. Knowing she wasn’t alone, that he intended to stand
by her and the baby suddenly made facing the future much easier to bear.

What she
found harder to understand was her physical reaction to his presence. Holy heat.
Although only their upper bodies touched, and the brush of his lips on her
temple left a lingering tingle, arousal blossomed. It baffled and embarrassed
her.

Sure,
she’d not suffered rape during her incarceration only the vile gropes when
Roderick first threatened her and the occasional grab since, but still, didn’t
trauma kill desire? Shouldn’t she be in a man-hating mode?
Unwilling
to trust or get intimate?
And she was pregnant with David’s kid, and
David was Trent’s brother. Wasn’t it sick to want him? Could pregnant women get
horny?

It didn’t
matter what she thought about it, or the reasons crowding her mind against it.
According to her hormones, she wanted him—wanted him bad.

So when he
kissed her, she didn’t do any of the things a normal victim would do. Forget
crying, screaming for help, or kneeing him in the balls. Her reaction? She
kissed him back. Opened her mouth and invited him in, eager to taste, hungry
for more of the fire he ignited with his simple presence. She demanded more,
needed more with a frantic urgency because clasped in his arms, his body fully
pressed against hers in all its hard glory, she felt
alive
. Alive in a way she never thought she’d feel again.

It made her
aggressive, and she boldly sucked his tongue, quivering when he groaned in
reply. Her fingers, caught between their bodies, clutched at his T-shirt,
fisting it. Her lower body arched into him, her sex pulsing with wet heat, begging
him silently to touch her. He caught the message but didn’t give her what she
wanted.

He pulled
away from her. “We shouldn’t do this. You’re not thinking clearly.”

“This is
probably the most clearheaded I’ve been in weeks,” she retorted. “Will you deny
me pleasure? Kind of mean seeing as how you started it. And besides, didn’t you
promise to take care of me?” She tugged his hand down and slid it between their
bodies, pressing it against her mound. “I know I’m being brazen, which really
isn’t like me, but I think I need this, Trent. I need to remember what it feels
like to be happy. That not everything is darkness and pain.” She kissed him,
and he allowed it for a moment before turning his head with a muffled curse.

“Dammit. This
is so wrong. I should leave.”

Some of
her warm buzz faded, and coldness seeped back in. “I thought you wanted me?”
God, she hated how pitiful that sounded.

“I do.
Fuck me, but I do. But—”

“It’s
fine. I understand. I’m a pregnant cow and a slut. I wouldn’t want me either.”
She shut up lest he hear the tears clogging her throat.

“I never
said that.”

She pushed
at his chest, trying to move away, before he spotted the tears brimming in her
eyes.
I am such a fucking idiot. What was
I thinking?
Why on earth would he want her? Why would anyone?
Pregnant and the fucked-up victim of a vampire.
What
possessed her to think she could have a man like Trent? A man with enough looks
and confidence to get any woman he wanted?

“Don’t
cry,” he murmured, his knuckle brushing the moisture clinging to her lashes.

“I’m not,”
she lied.

Trapped
still in the circle of his arms, she couldn’t move away when he leaned forward
to kiss her lips softly. “You’re beautiful,
Thea
.”

“You’re
just saying that ’cause I’m crying. It’s what nice guys do,” she sniffled.

“I’m not a
nice guy.” He flashed her a wicked grin, and a tremulous smile curled her lips.

“Yes, you
are. I’m sorry I put you on the spot like that. It won’t happen again.”

“What if I
want it, too? I want you,
Thea
. I know I should wait
and give you some space to heal. I know it’s too soon since your ordeal, but,
dammit, I still want you.”

“Then why
push me away?”

“Because
we’re strangers. Because I’m afraid you’ll resent me in the morning for taking
advantage. Because . . .” He stopped talking, and a shadow crossed his face.

“Because I
slept with your brother first.”

He
inclined his head.

“I guess
that is kind of gross. I’m sorry.”

“It’s not
gross. In my culture, brothers often share a mate, but . . .” He clamped his
lips tightly, and she thought he’d stop talking, but instead he blurted it out
in a rush. “David and I are so different. I’m big and rough. I’m not a guy for
flowery speeches or shit like that. I don’t want to be compared to him.”

She heard
what he didn’t say:
and come up lacking
.
“David was a nice guy, at first. I won’t lie. But honestly, when he touched me,
it didn’t feel like my whole body was going to burn to a crisp. You make me
want to come and with just a kiss. I don’t think you have anything to fear.”

“Except
for in the morning when you realize you jumped into the sack with a stranger
and can’t look me in the eye.”

She
smiled. “And that matters to you?”

“Yeah.”

“Most guys
would be happy to have a girl pretend it never happened and not try and force a
relationship he didn’t ask for.”

“I’m
not most guys
,
Thea
. I’m a wolf.
It’s different with us.”

“Different
how? I never did learn much about the whole furry thing other than it’s scary
to watch.”

“There’s
more to us than our ability to go canine. Most of us live in packs, led by an
alpha, the strongest not only physically but mentally overall. We follow a
strict set of laws, laws that protect us from discovery and from allowing our
base instincts to take over. But some things can’t be controlled by rules.”

“Like?”

“Mating.
Some of our kind get together because of friendship or because our parents
arranged it, but some of us, the lucky ones, will meet a woman and instantly
know she’s meant to be ours.”

“How?” she
whispered.

“Scent.
Instinct. The wolf. We meet the right woman, and we want her. Need her.”

“For sex?”

“Sex that
lasts a lifetime. When a wolf meets his female, he claims her. Marks her with a
bite, and she in turn bites him back, completing a blood circle that binds them
forever.”

“Why are
you telling me this?” A chill went through her as she touched the scar on her
neck, a faint impression of teeth that never faded after David bit her their
first time.

“My
brother mated you,” he answered before she could question.

“How could
he? I never said
yes
.”

“Wolves
don’t often ask. We just do.”

“But I
never bit him back, so how could we be mated?”

“You
didn’t?”

She shook
her head.

“Didn’t
you have an urge to?”

Held by
his brother, the conversation infinitely weird, she should have shied from it,
but didn’t because she was finally getting answers, whether she liked them or
not. “No. I was attracted to him. There was a little spark, but that’s about
it. He bit me. I kind of freaked, and he apologized.
End of
story.
So what does it mean?”

“I’m not
sure. I’ve never heard of a half-mating before. Speaking of sparks, what do you
feel when I touch you?”

A blush
heated her cheeks. “I don’t know if we should keep talking about this.”

“You feel it,
don’t you? Almost like an electrical current?”

She
nodded.

“I feel
the same thing. I have since the moment we first touched. I saw you, and
despite everything going on, I want to pick you up and run away with you.
Protect you.”

“Because
of the baby.”

“No.
Because of you.
You’re my mate,
Thea
.
I know it might be hard for you to handle, especially with everything else, but
knowing you’re my mate is why I can’t make love to your body. Why I can’t
pleasure you. Why I sound like such a fucking dork.”

“I don’t
think you sound dorky.” She smiled.

“Yeah, I
do. Trust me, I usually have the mouth of a trucker, even around women. I don’t
say nice, thoughtful things. Or talk about feelings and shit.”

“Why?”

“Because I
hadn’t met the right woman before, I guess. I hadn’t met you, which is why you
need to take the time to think this through. Because of who we are, we can’t
just fuck—no matter what our bodies say.”

“I don’t
understand.” He wanted her, but didn’t because of some weird culture thing?

“Once we
have sex, there will be no going back. No morning-after regret. I will claim
you. You will be mine, which means forever.”

“And
you’re not sure?”

“Oh, I am.
I don’t need to date you for a week, a month, or a year to know you’re the one
I’ve waited for. But you don’t have that certainty yet. You want to feel alive.
Have me touch you and fuck you, but when the morning comes, are you prepared
for the fact I won’t be able to let you walk away?”

“This is
insane.”

“Which is
why I stopped.”

“No, not
your story. Just, I wondered why I felt this way. I knew it wasn’t normal for
me to want a guy so bad. To ignore everything that’s happened to me. And now
you’re telling me, there’s a reason for it. It’s kind of reassuring, actually.”

“You feel
it, too?”

“I think
so, only . . .” She chewed her lip.

“Only
what?”

She
dropped her voice to the barest whisper. “This is going to sound horrible, but
maybe I’m wrong because I feel it for Darren, too. And to a much lesser extent,
Marc.”

She waited
for his anger and his disgust. Instead he laughed. “I’m sure that will make them
happy when they hear.”

“Okay, I
think I missed something.”

“Oh, shit,
how to explain this without making it sound like we’re perverts?”

“Now I’m really
worried.”

“There are
more males than female
Lycans
. Because of this vast
ratio, the council adopted a policy hundreds of years ago that states females
must take a minimum of two mates, up to a maximum of four.”

“That’s
barbaric!”

“Yes,
which is why the current council is trying to change the laws. They’re managed
to a certain extent. Now the women get a choice in who their mates will be
instead of having their parents or their alpha choose for them.”