Seeking Vengeance (14 page)

“Are you still in the ATF?
I know you said you’re on leave, but…” She hadn’t been sure when he explained but then wondered if he was allowed to reveal his status with the government agency. “I’m sorry. I seem to keep asking questions I have no right to ask.”

Sam chuckled. “You’re fine.
Yes, I’m on leave and I’m not supposed to be doing what I’m doing, but that didn’t matter to me.” He leaned both hands on the railing and shrugged. “I never thought beyond getting revenge.”

“
But now you’re going to just arrest him, right?

He grun
ted. “Yeah, but sadly, inside of a day he’d be out on bail and disappear. I’ve seen it happen before. I know it’s not what you want, but I can’t see any other solution but to take Howard down.”

Molly
caught her breath as cold invaded her body as if someone had dipped her in a vat of ice water. Howard? She backed up a step, bumping into the corner of the railing. No, it couldn’t be. Ray was an ass and a jerk, and she still felt shame at how he had tricked her into bed, but he wasn’t a killer. He couldn’t be the guy Sam kept calling The Enforcer.

“Who is
Howard?” She prayed silently that it was a different man with the same last name. It was pretty common, after all.

“
Howard…Ray Howard…the Enforcer.” Sam regarded her, his head cocked. “Why? Do you know him?” The last was asked in a low, hard voice.

Swallowing hard, Molly gripped the railing behind her, and shook her head.
She opened her mouth to tell him yes, but even with his face in shadows, she felt his hostility roll over her. “No…no, I don’t think so.” Unable to meet his eyes, she ran her hands up and down her arms, and despite the warmth of the evening, she started shivering. “I’m going to go in. It’s chilly out here.”

Ignoring
his questioning look, she brushed past him and went into the house. Unsure where to go, she paused and saw Kelsie snuggled up on the sofa. One doll had slipped from her grasp and lay on the floor. The sweet innocence made a sob catch in her throat. Her daughter could not be related to the man who had killed Sam’s son. It couldn’t be true. She smoothed the hair back from Kelsie’s forehead and pressed a kiss to her brow. Gathering her in her arms, she carried her to bed, hesitating. On one hand, Sam’s bed was so much bigger, but she couldn’t bear to sleep in his bed. Instead she put Kelsie in Sean’s room. Before their trip to town, she had changed all the sheets in the house and put fresh ones on and now she was glad she had. No way could she sleep with Sam’s scent enveloping her.

After tucking Kelsie into bed, where the little girl turned over and fell back into a deep sleep, Molly headed
to the bathroom. She needed time to think. Why had she lied to Sam? It wasn’t as if she felt any loyalty to Ray. Running her hands into her hair, she tried to sort through her emotions. Could Ray have really been behind the death of Sam’s son and mother? It was too much to take in. Sitting on the edge of the tub, she cradled her head.

A soft knock sounded on the door. “Molly?”

Molly jumped up and said, “Just a minute.”

“I just wondered if you were okay.”

“Yeah, I’m fine. I’ll be out shortly.”

Turning the water on, she stared at herself while waiting for the water to warm. Sam would hate her if he knew. She sobbed, glad for the sound of the running water to cover
her sobs. And Kelsie.
Dear God
. He wouldn’t even want to look at her. Protectiveness welled inside of her. She had to leave. Kelsie would be disappointed, but she couldn’t let Sam’s eventual rejection of Kelsie hurt her. She splashed her face with water, scrubbing her eyes. Besides, she was no longer afraid of The Enforcer. Even if he was guilty of what Sam accused him of, she had no fear for herself or for Kelsie anymore. Reaching for the towel on the rack, she patted the water off her face. As evil as Ray could be and might have been, he wouldn’t kill his own daughter.

Sam paced the living room. He wanted to believe Molly when she had said she hadn’t known Howard but her body language betrayed her. Why had she lied to him and why had she fled his presence?

He replayed their conversation in his mind, stopping at the point where she said he should keep the house. He hadn’t considered ever living here, but the last few days, he had felt more
alive than he had since Sean’s death. Even before his son had died, he had felt disconnected. It was all the undercover work. No matter how hard he tried, he had felt like he was losing himself in the role. The one thing that had anchored him to his real life had been Sean. Sam paused in front of the bookcase and reached for the photo album, pulling it from the slot. Angling the spine across the edge of the mantel, he flipped it open to a random page.

Sean grinned out at him, his little body coated in sand, a blue plastic bucket in one hand and a matching shovel in the other. Beside him was a lump of sand with a few sticks poking out of the top. A castle. Sa
m’s throat ached even as he smiled at the sweet memory of digging in the sand with his son. Blinking hard, he scanned the other photos on the page. Sean holding a tiny fish up, and then another snapshot of him asleep at the dinner table, his cheeks pink from sun, his hand still gripping a fork filled with mashed potatoes. A chuckle squeezed past the ache as Sam recalled taking the picture. Afterward, he had carried Sean to bed. Closing his eyes, he felt again, the warm limp weight of his son against his chest, his head lolling on Sam’s shoulder. The memory hurt, but at the same time, joy rose in him. Joy that the memory was so pure and untarnished with thoughts of his son’s death. Even though the pain was still there, the joy tempered it.

At the click of the b
athroom door opening, Sam shut the album and wiped his forearm across his eyes. Molly padded into the living room, wearing a large t-shirt and soft fleece shorts. It was hardly lingerie, but he knew what was concealed beneath the baggy shirt, and the shorts clung to her curves invitingly. Her face appeared damp, her eyelashes spiky but he attributed it to washing until he noticed a slight red puffiness on her eyelids. She gripped the hem of her shirt, repeatedly twisting it and untwisting it as her gaze darted to the photo album, but other than a slight lift of her eyebrows, she didn’t react to it. Instead, she sat on the edge of the recliner opposite him.

“I’ve decided that Kelsie and I need to go home tomorrow.”

Sam gave a shake of his head. “What? You can’t. We’ve already discussed this. As long as your brother is in their radar, they’ll stop at nothing to get what they want. If it means using you and Kelsie as bait to get Johnny to cough up the money he owes them, they won’t hesitate.”

Molly dipped a shoulder and avoided meeting his eyes. “I don’t think they will. Why would they come now when they could have done something before?”

“Because they planned on him getting the message when they shot up the bar. Except Johnny didn’t have a clue that the message they sent was aimed at him.”

Her eyes narrowed. “I know you think Johnn
y’s an idiot, but don’t worry, we’ll deal with the situation ourselves. We don’t need your help.”

Setting the album o
n the coffee table, Sam regarded Molly, unable to hide his surprise at her sudden change of mood. He knew it had something to do with Howard, but since she had denied knowing him, he didn’t want to push. He could be wrong about her knowing the man. Molly was just too pure to ever be tarnished by the likes of Howard. He supposed her abrupt change in demeanor had to do with his plan of getting revenge, but she didn’t have anything to do with that. Being a paramedic, her job was to save people, not kill them, so it was natural for her to reject Sam’s plan, no matter that Howard deserved it. He could certainly respect that view. He used to hold a similar one.

She and Kelsie just needed to stay here so they would be safe from
Howard until Sam managed to exact his retribution. Once he had accomplished that, Molly, Kelsie and even Johnny would be safe. Sam would make sure of that even if he had to wrangle them into the Witness Protection program. He had friends in the U.S. Marshals. Sam had no delusions that their problems would magically disappear if Howard was behind bars or dead, but the difficulties would be greatly reduced as the Ravens’ organization would probably fall apart without Howard—he was the key. “Talk to me, Molly. Did I say something that bothered you?”

Her shoulders slumped for a moment, but she shook her head. “No, it’s just that I have to get back to work. We’ll be fine.”

Sam rose and crossed to her. She watched him, her eyes unreadable, but she broke contact and bit her lip. He reached out, touching a finger to her chin, and with a little pressure, urged her to raise her gaze to his. “Look, I understand that you don’t want to have a relationship with me. I can’t blame you, but don’t put yourself and your daughter in jeopardy because of…of your dislike of me.” He tried to stifle the hurt he felt that she didn’t like him, but he nudged it aside. No matter what she felt for him, he couldn’t let her go home and be in harm’s way.

He had an idea and reached behind him, pulling the coffee table close so he could sit on it. “
I can arrange for you to go somewhere else safe if I have to. I would rather you were here because nobody else knows Howard like I do, but I have a friend, Dave in the Bureau. He and his wife Cynthia live in Chicago, so it’s not too far away. I know they would welcome you and Kelsie. It wouldn’t be permanent, but just until things blow over.”

“Oh, Sam…” Molly worked the hem again, watching her hands and not him. “It’s not you, and believe me, Kelsie was foremost in my mind when I made my decision. I would like for Johnny to remain here though, if that’s okay?” She finally looked at him again. “I’d feel better knowing he was safe with you until his problem is resolved.”

He nodded. “Of course.” At least she wasn’t completely rejecting him. “I hope you’ll re-think your decision though. I promise to keep my distance from you, if that’s the issue.”

A tear escaped from the corner of her eye and she dashed it away, sha
king her head. “It isn’t. It’s a Friday anyway, so we might as well stay one more day, then go home on Sunday. It’ll give Kelsie one more day on the beach.”

Sighing, Sam stood. “Fine.” He wandered into the kitchen, opened the fridge and stared into the interior for a minute before he remembered what he was looking for. A beer. He snagged one off the shelf and started to close the door, when Molly came up behind him.

“I’ll have one too.”

Sam shrugged
and removed another, handing it to her. “Here.”

She unscrewed t
he cap and took a long draught. Righting the bottle, she smiled. “Ah. That’s good.” With that, she turned and left the kitchen, pausing in the threshold, her eyebrow raised as she tipped her head towards the front of the house. “Want to join me on the porch? No talk of Johnny or the Ravens though. I just want to relax in the time we have left here.”

Surprised, he hesitated;
as much as he wanted to spend time with her, would it be wise? There wasn’t much hope for them, but the night was perfect and they had been so comfortable for a few minutes out there before he had said something that had upset her. “Sure.” He took another beer to save a trip back inside. He knew it still wouldn’t be enough to numb his feelings, but it was a good start.

Instead of sharing the swing, they ambled around the side of the house to the beach. The moon was almost full and cast a silver path
that danced across the lake.

Molly stopped and he caught his brea
th at how the moonlight seemed to kiss her face, highlighting her cheekbones and perfect skin. She had pulled a light long sleeved blouse over her t-shirt, and it fluttered in a faint breeze. She tilted the bottle and took a sip, letting her head fall back. “Look at the sky, Sam. All those stars! It’s amazing!”

He tore his gaze from her, turning it heavenwards. It was gorgeous. Thousands of stars, like diamonds on velvet, dotted the sky. He glanced at her, enjoying her amazement as he took a swallow from his beer. “Beautiful.” He looked at her rather than the sky, and she did a double take.
He finally tore his eyes away and smiled. “Victoria’s brother and I used to camp out here when we were kids. We would drag our sleeping bags out of the tent and lie on our backs looking for shooting stars. One time, we fell asleep like that, and it’s kind of a good thing because we had brought a ton of junk food outside with us.” He chuckled. “It was like we thought we were going to die of starvation in the 12 hours we’d be out here. We’d have bags of chips, soda, candy bars, cookies. You name it. Anyway, that night, we had gorged and came out to watch for shooting stars. It was a hot night and it was cooler than inside the tent. We woke up to snorting and scuffling, only to find a black bear in our tent ransacking our food.”

Molly’s teeth flashed as
she grinned. “You’re lucky it didn’t attack you.”

“Aw hell, with that much junk in her belly, she had no interest in two skinny boys, but we high
-tailed it screaming our heads off back to the house.”

Giggling, she slogged through the sand to the lounge chairs, and sat on the end of one, kicking off her sandals and digging her toes into the sand. “What did your folks say?”

Sam sat on the chair beside her own chair, and shrugged. “My dad said,” Sam lowered his voice in an imitation of his father, “’Why the hell do you think I told you boys to eat in the house? So you wouldn’t attract bears! Now the tent’s ruined!’” He chuckled. “I had to work at a resort across the lake for the rest of the summer, gutting and cleaning fish for the vacationers in order to earn enough money to replace the tent. Worst job
ever
.”

He finished
his beer and set the bottle beneath the foot of the lounger, making a note to take it back to the house. “I got to be an expert at it though. I could clean a fish in about five minutes and earn five bucks doing it. It was just all those damn scales. And the smell…” Sam shuddered at the memory of the fishy smell. “One or two that I catch myself isn’t a big deal, but dozens a week is something else entirely. No matter how many showers I took, the smell of fish lingered on me. I even caught a couple of cute girls making a face and wrinkling their noses at me when I walked past them. Talk about a blow to my adolescent ego.”

Molly burst out laughin
g, curling forward with her hand to her mouth as if to stifle the sound but she lost that battle as a belly laugh escaped and she flopped back on the chair.

Watching her, Sam g
rinned and he couldn’t remember the last time he had smiled so wide and that made his grin even stretch just a little more. “You’re enjoying my sad tales of woe just a bit too much.”

Propping herself on her elbows, she tried to catch her breath, but the pose made her shirt drop away from her body and her t-shirt pulled against her breasts.
“I can assure you that you no longer smell like fish.”

“Good t
o know.” Sam chuckled, then cracked open the second beer he had brought with him. On one hand, he wanted to be out with her all night, but he didn’t know if he could take being in her presence and not being able to take her in his arms. Maybe it was better to just go to bed. After a cold shower. A really long, really cold, shower. He guzzled half the beer.

* * *

Molly caught her breath, as she straightened to take the last drink from her beer. She wasn’t much of a beer drinker, but it tasted good out here on the beach. The scent of the air, tinged with smoke from someone’s bonfire, the mosquito spray she had used and the damp marshy smell of the lake and sand was like a balm, easing her stress. She glanced at Sam when he tilted his head back and downed the rest of the bottle. Why couldn’t things be different? She had never felt this way for anyone before, and it figured the one man she fell for was the one she couldn’t have. She tipped her beer, but lowered it in frustration when nothing came out. “Shoot.”

Sam handed her
the fresh one he’d just opened. “Share mine.”

T
heir hands touched when she accepted it, and she watched as he followed her movements as she took a swig. A little beer escaped her mouth and trickled down her neck before she could stop it. Sam’s gaze scorched a trail down her neck, his eyes fixed on the progress of the drop. She pretended not to notice and took another sip, this time letting some drip out intentionally.

It followed the path
of the other drop down her neck and across her chest, but it didn’t make it to safety beneath her t-shirt. Sam interrupted its path with a finger. He skimmed his finger back up, retracing the drop’s path, before burying his hand in the thick hair at the nape of her neck, drawing her closer. Although his touch was light and encouraging, it was as if he had pulled her to him with superhuman strength, making her feel light as a feather as she melted against him, as he licked the beer off her throat.

“Sam…”
she breathed. His lips were hot as his breath warmed her skin, and she shivered at the sensation. The instant she had let the beer trickle down her neck she knew she’d made up her mind. She let her head drop back, allowing him free access. His lips traveled up the column of her throat, kissing, licking and nibbling. His hand burned against her stomach, and when it slipped under the hem of her shirt, and skimmed up, she moaned and turned her face to his, seeking his lips.