Semiautomatic Marriage (16 page)

What was Jasper’s intention? she wondered. Was he going to reveal some devastating truth about her parentage?

Carolyn had made inquiries about pictures and information about her mother, but without success. She had never quite believed that both her mother’s father and brother could be completely in the dark about who had gotten her pregnant. Had she been raped by some stranger? Had some lowlife preyed on her innocence?

“It’s okay,” Adam reassured her quietly as if
reading her thoughts. “Remember, whatever you learn about your parentage doesn’t change who you are. You’ve already proved your stature as a very lovely, intelligent, caring human being.”

She gave him a grateful smile as Jasper motioned for them to sit on a deep leather couch. He cleared his throat and made a big production of handing Carolyn an envelope containing old photos.

“Most of them are of me,” Jasper confessed. “But your mother’s in some.”

Carolyn’s hands trembled slightly as she looked at the snapshots. Jasper was the main subject of all of the photos. He was a young man in his late teens, and a child of eight or nine was either smiling or making faces in the background.
My mother?
Carolyn let the tip of one finger trace her mother’s pretty features, and the grin on her face. She appeared to be a happy child. What had gone wrong? Why had Alicia run away from home? And left a child unnamed and unwanted?

“And you don’t have any pictures of her mother when she was older?” Adam asked, unable to believe that these few snapshots were all there were.

Jasper frowned. “I don’t know what happened to the box of photographs that used to be in the library. When Della moved in, she cleaned out a whole lot of old stuff that had been lying around gathering dust. Of course, we didn’t know then what was going to happen. I mean, who would have thought that Alicia’s daughter would appear out of nowhere? It does seem unbelievable, doesn’t it?”

“Yes, it does,” Carolyn agreed. “I wonder what my mother would say about all this? Do you think
she might be as surprised as anyone that her father left his fortune to her daughter?”

Jasper declined to speculate and just shrugged his bony shoulders. Carolyn handed back the photos and he didn’t offer to let her keep them. He just tossed them into a desk drawer as if they were of little value.

Adam studied Jasper. There was no softness in the blue of the man’s eyes as he looked at Carolyn, and the unfeeling expression verified what Adam had suspected all along. The man was not the detached, vague personality that he pretended to be. A deep rancor seemed to be simmering beneath Jasper’s exterior of a single-minded scientist. Adam wondered how much responsibility he bore for his sister’s unhappy life. More importantly, Adam was concerned that now Carolyn might have become the focus of that bitterness and resentment.

Carolyn thanked her uncle politely for sharing the photos. When they left the library, she and Adam made their way to their wing of the house. She pretended a desire for an early night, and only nodded when Adam said he was going to take a little walk before turning in.

The night air was heavy as he let himself out a side door on the ground floor. Strolling on a path around the perimeter of the house, he was conscious of the building’s enormity. The Stanford mansion was in the same class as the Vanderbilt or Astor estates. Carolyn’s inheritance had vaulted her into a position that would ensure she’d marry wealth, a man of social prestige.

Adam scowled and kicked a small stone out of the way. A quiver of jealousy surprised him, and he
had to remind himself that his challenge was to bring her safely through this investigation and bless her future happiness. As he looked up at the second-floor windows, he saw that lights were on in Della’s home office and was tempted to drop in on her for a casual chat. He knew that such a visit would be completely out of context with his undercover role; Adam knew better than to attract any kind of attention that could sabotage the whole investigation. Why would a new bridegroom be wandering around the house alone, instead of curled up in bed with his beautiful new wife?

As he returned to the house, uppermost in his mind was the need to mend fences with Carolyn as quickly as possible. It was imperative that they keep the pretense intact. Fortunately everyone at dinner seemed to be too involved with their own thoughts to notice the strain between them. At least he hoped that was the case—you never knew how much a single look or a tone of voice could give away. If Carolyn was still awake when he got back to their room, they’d better have another talk.

He was disappointed to find her in bed and apparently asleep, though he couldn’t be sure she wasn’t feigning sleep to avoid him. He sighed. First thing tomorrow, before they went down to breakfast, they’d have to set things straight between them.

A
T TWO IN THE MORNING
, Carolyn awoke screaming from a recurring childhood nightmare that had come back with a vengeance. The dream had initially started after a malicious older orphan had taunted Carolyn, saying she’d been found behind a stack of wood at the foundling home. The cruel girl had even
taken Carolyn out to show her the place where the logs were stacked. In her nightmare Carolyn was buried under the heavy wood, and no matter how frantically she cried and struggled to get free, someone was about to set fire to the wood logs covering her.

Her screams instantly woke Adam, and as he reached for her across the bed, she flayed at him and kept crying.

“Don’t burn me. Don’t burn me.” She fought him with the fierceness of a trapped animal. Her nails scratched his arms as he tried to soothe her.

“Carolyn, wake up. You’re okay. You’re okay.”

Slowly his voice penetrated the haze in her mind, and staring at him, wide-eyed, she began to climb out of the swirling fear that had engulfed her.

“You were dreaming. You’re all right.”

Her breath was coming in gulps, and she could still feel the imaginary flames and the heavy weight of the wood on her. He put his arms around her and gradually she let her body slump against his.

He stroked her hair as he touched his lips to her tear-streaked cheek, then he gathered her close.

In the circle of his protective arms, the terror still racing through her body began to ease. After a few minutes the drumming of her heart slowed, and her breathing deepened. She closed her eyes and let the warmth of his body act as a barricade to the horror of the nightmare.

“You okay?” he asked gently, and she nodded as they lay quietly together. The only sound was the muted hum of the bedside clock. As he held her in his arms, Adam was acutely aware of the length of her body pressed against his. Even the nightclothes
they both wore were little defense against his thoughts of what her tantalizing nakedness would be like. He ached to run his hands over her tempting curves and bring his lips to her trembling mouth.

With great effort, he pulled his thoughts away from this dangerous avenue of thinking. In her dazed and vulnerable state, she would probably respond. And then what? Would she ever believe that he had truly intended to keep their marriage a platonic one? Once they made love, there would be no going back, and neither of them needed to be emotionally torn apart when the stakes were so high.

He wasn’t surprised when she slowly removed herself from his embrace and lay on her back, looking up at the ceiling.

“Do you want to tell me about it?” he asked gently, raising himself on one elbow, and looking down at her. “Maybe it would help.”

“I’m…I’m sorry,” she stammered. She hadn’t had the nightmare for a long time and she was embarrassed by her hysterics. What must he think of her? She’d been chastised and ridiculed by foster parents for disturbing the whole house with her “childish tantrums.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry about,” he assured her as he gently turned her face toward him. One of the window drapes had not been drawn fully closed, letting moonlight into the room. Slivers of light were reflected in her moist eyes, making them lovelier than ever, but he was aware of the pain in their depths. “There’s no crime in having a bad dream, sweet Carolyn.”

She searched his face as if seeking reassurance. Then she moistened her lips and told him the story.
By the time she’d finished, such anger had built up in him that he wanted to punish someone for the anguish she’d suffered. If he’d had any doubts that she deserved the good fortune that had come her way, they were swept away. He vowed then and there that if anyone ever hurt her again, they’d have to answer to him.

“I’m glad you told me,” he said as he tucked her, almost like a child, in the crook of his arm. She didn’t resist or pull away, but closed her eyes and took a deep breath as if just the telling had restored her.

When her measured breathing told him she’d fallen asleep, he eased back to his side of the bed. He couldn’t depend on his willpower to control the temptation he’d feel if he awoke and found her warm, inviting body next to his. It had been far too long since he’d been sexually satisfied. He knew damn well that he’d found a woman who could fire a passion that had been dormant since Marietta’s death. He also knew that he was in danger of falling in love with a woman who would only bring him another heartache. He silently groaned. Why couldn’t Arthur Stanford’s long-lost granddaughter been someone less beautiful and captivating? The assignment was difficult enough. He sure as hell didn’t need his heart put through the wringer at the same time.

C
AROLYN OVERSLEPT THE
next morning and awoke with a start when Adam entered the room with a breakfast tray.

“Hi, sweetness.”

She was startled at the endearment. There was no
one around to hear it. Was he feeling sorry for her because of the nightmare? Her pride instantly began to prickle and she sat up. She couldn’t stand to be pitied. “What’s all this?”

“I thought you deserved breakfast in bed. Especially when the atmosphere in the breakfast room seems to be a repeat of last night’s dinner. Of course, if you’d rather face Jasper’s glower and Della’s caustic remarks, I can take the tray back.”

“Not on your life.” She fluffed the pillow behind her and sat up straighter. He put the tray on her lap. Sniffing and lifting the lids, she saw cereal, biscuits and strawberries with cream. Relaxing, she quipped, “Thank you, sir. You’re a good man.”

You don’t know how good,
he thought wryly. She’d never know how utterly desirable she’d been lying in his arms. He deserved a medal for exemplary behavior.

“What are your plans for the day?” he asked as he lowered himself on a corner of the bed.

She looked thoughtful as she bit into a biscuit. “I don’t really know. Any suggestions?”

“I thought we might go shopping for a car. It seems to me you should have wheels of your own. And…”

“And what?” she prodded when he hesitated.

“I’d feel better about you driving yourself around, instead of depending on someone.”

She searched his face. “Is there something you’re not telling me? Nothing happened yesterday when Lisa was chauffeuring us around. And I can always drive one of the cars in the garage.”

“It’s just better to control as many variables as we can.”

“I don’t know what that means,” she admitted, frowning.

“It means that it’s easier to make sure one car is safe than two or three.”

“Safe?” she echoed, knowing exactly what he meant. He wasn’t talking about ordinary mechanical problems. “You don’t think…” Her voice trailed off.

“I’m not thinking anything definite at the moment, but you need a car and I think it’s a good idea to get one now. How about it? What kind of car have you always wanted?”

“One that has good tires and always starts on the first try.”

He laughed. “I think we can find one like that.”

C
AROLYN COULDN’T DECIDE
which of her new clothes to wear. Should she save them for a special occasion?
Like buying your first new car?
an inner voice asked. She finally chose a pair of light-wool maroon pants that hugged her slender hips, and a lavender cotton blouse, then accented the outfit with a bold gold-and-amethyst necklace. She pulled her hair high on her head to show off matching earrings and dabbed sinfully expensive perfume behind her ears.

Adam whistled when he saw her. “You look like a lady whose ready to buy the fanciest car on wheels. Let’s go make some salesman’s day.”

Finding the right car didn’t turn out to be as easy as Adam had thought. Carolyn was completely blown away by the fact that she could write out a check for any new-model automobile that struck her fancy. She wandered through showrooms like a
child offered so many sweets it’s impossible to make a choice.

“How about this one?”

“Do you want something bigger?”

“This blue one matches your eyes,” he said, as they viewed a snappy little sports car.

“I don’t think that’s me,” she said cautiously. “Maybe something a little bigger and not so showy.”

She finally decided on a midsize foreign model, white with a burgundy interior. Adam breathed a sigh of relief.

The dealership agreed to deliver it to the house that afternoon. They grabbed a quick lunch and Adam drove them in his rental to Horizon.

As he parked he said, “I think I should spend some time in the business office.” Quickly he told her about his breakfast chat with Susan Kimble. “She intrigues me. I learned from someone else that she’s the business manager. That’s a position of great responsibility.”

“You don’t think she has anything to do with the black-market drugs, do you?” Carolyn looked at him in surprise. “She seems so…so nice.”

“At this early stage I’m simply looking for a thread I can unravel. Then I’ll follow it and see where it leads. The closer we get to identifying the guilty ones, the more likely they’ll try to stop us. Once that happens, the danger increases. Your position alone, Carolyn, puts you in jeopardy,” he warned her. “Don’t do anything on your own without checking with me first.”

Carolyn’s first impulse—to remind him that she could take care of herself—died when she saw the
hard glint in his eyes. His professional briskness didn’t invite any argument, and there was a fierceness about him that startled her. Was this the same man who’d held her tenderly last night and soothed her fears? It was ironic that she wore his wedding ring and slept every night in the same bed with him. She really didn’t know Adam Lawrence at all.