Serving Mr. Stevens, Part Four: The Price of Pleasure -- An Erotic Romance (Part 4 of 5) (3 page)

“The next day I went to his office. I didn’t know what to expect, but he made it clear from the start that this was no ordinary meeting. He was… how do I put it? Just short of brutal. He scared me, but I
liked
it. And I wanted more – he knew I did… and so two days later, he sat me down in his office and read me the contract. The same thing he did with you, I’m sure. And believe me, he put that contract into action the
moment
I signed it.”

Suddenly, I felt my blood getting hot. The jealousy came out of nowhere, and it slammed into me like a speeding truck. I could almost picture Mr. Stevens bending her over the desk and hiking up her skirt, spanking her as she moaned in pleasure. I could almost picture her on her knees in front of him. It was enough to make my head spin and my stomach turn. I was shocked by my reaction, for I’d already known he’d had a contract with Katarina. What else could I have expected? But hearing it put into very clear terms like this was far, far different.

Katarina was looking at me with understanding. “I’m sorry,” she said. “You don’t want to hear this.”

I shook my head. “No, I don’t. You’re right. But I need to hear it, don’t I?”

We exchanged a look of commiseration, the kind of look that only women who knew Mr. Stevens could possibly understand. We were in this together, like it or not, and now she was giving me the history I needed to help piece together this puzzle.

I let out a long sigh, my exhaled breath rattling softly as it came out of me. I looked at her steadily. I was ready to hear this.

“…Keep going.”

Katarina cradled the coffee cup in her hand, taking a moment to steel herself before continuing.

“Mr. Stevens was very patient with me. I realize that now,”
she said, bringing the mug to her lips for another sip. “He was insanely generous with me, to tell the truth. I was a sassy, smart-ass upstart who didn’t know what the hell I was doing or who I was. He had to teach me all that. But as I came to realize, that was part of what he loved doing. He loved molding me into what he wanted me to be. A better version of my own true self, let’s say.”

I had somewhat of an understanding of what she meant. Already I knew that I was different from the woman I’d been when he met me, and for the most part all those changes felt like good ones. I felt more in control, more confident, sexier than I had ever been, more intelligent, more persuasive, more perceptive… just, somehow,
more
of everything. And I had Mr. Stevens to credit for that, as strange as that was to admit.

“I did everything for him,” she said, her voice heavy with emotion. She had a nostalgic, faraway look in her eye now. “I completely let myself go, and he never once made me regret it. But then…”

She sighed. I could feel the pain radiating from her body. “Then he… just got tired of me, I suppose. He gets bored easily, you know. It takes so damn much to engage him, especially with sex. He’s insatiable that way. He went further and further with me, indulging more and more, until he finally just… had enough, I suppose.” She turned her wide eyes to me, searching my face for understanding. “Have you ever craved something, and then once you got it, you didn’t want it anymore?”

“It’s like candy,” I said softly. My voice was quiet, so quiet that it sounded to my own ears as though it was coming from someone else, very far away. “I might crave it, sure, but once I eat a whole bag of it, I don’t want anymore. I still want to keep it around, just in case – but it no longer holds the same appeal.”

Katarina stared at me, and I could see that my words had hurt her. I winced; maybe I shouldn’t have put it so bluntly.

“I’m sorry…”

“No.” She held up a hand, and I saw it shaking just the slightest bit. “You’re absolutely right. That’s exactly what it was like. I was the candy, and all of a sudden he’d had enough to satiate his sweet tooth.” She shrugged. “And then he didn’t want the candy anymore… he wanted something else. And that something else was you. ”

The shudder that ran through me was filled with too many emotions to sort through. There was a flash of anger at her, that she had been so in love with him, that insane jealousy rearing its head again. There was anger and some confusion toward him, too, for treating her this way, and for flaunting me – his new ‘candy’ – under her nose.  But there was relief that I had him now, underneath my anger – and then, of course, an instant pang guilt on the heels of that. And finally, a curiosity and sadness that made me reach out and take her hand in my own.

“How long has it been since you were together?” I asked her gently.             

Katarina shrugged. “About a year…” Then she looked at me, and the pain in her eyes was so stunning, so naked, that I wanted to look away but I couldn’t. It was the pain of a woman who had lost the one person on earth who’d made her whole.

“One year, three weeks, two days and…” – she glanced at the clock – “seven hours.”

“I’m sorry,” I said, with a sincerity that surprised me. “Katarina, I am so sorry you are hurting like this.”

She nodded, and we looked at each other with a newfound understanding, bound by a love that was stronger than either of us. There were tears in her eyes, but she didn’t let them fall. Instead, she gently pulled her hand away and stood up. “I should get out of here,” she said sharply.

“No,” I said immediately. “You should stay. We have to stick together now. We have to figure out what is going on.”

She looked at me hard for a moment, not wanting to give in, but she was so exhausted that she didn’t have much fight left in her. Where would she go, anyway? And how would she sleep when she got there, knowing that Mr. Stevens hadn’t gotten in touch with either of us yet?

She looked around my place for a moment, as if looking for a way out, but then finally gave in with a slump of her shoulders and a sheepish look on her face.

“Okay, I’ll stay,” she sighed. “Thanks, Candace. Mind if I use your shower?”

“Of course!” I grinned, rising happily up from my chair. “Let me get you a robe.” I quickly made my way to the bedroom and opened the drawers of my dresser. Katarina was a little slimmer than me, but she could still wear some of my stuff. Knowing she was accustomed to fine things, I pulled out one of my best, a baby-blue satin gown and matching robe.

“You can wear this when you come out of the shower. Everything you need should be in there.” I was very glad, suddenly, for my indulgence in nice shampoos and soaps. It was a stupid concern at the moment, but I suddenly felt self-conscious of my apartment and I wanted her to be impressed with it. I knew she was accustomed to a certain grand standard of living, and I felt a little shy in inviting her into my bathroom, where things weren’t nearly as ‘grand’ as I wished they were.

“Thank you,” she said, giving me a warm smile as she took the satin from my hands. She headed to the bathroom and gave me one last small smile over her shoulder before she closed the door.

I busied myself with tidying up the place while I listened to the water run. Having my hands busy kept me from thinking too much about Mr. Stevens and what he might be going through at that moment. There wasn’t much to do, unfortunately, and I found my mind wandering despite my best efforts. Was he being questioned? Was he in the midst of the investigation already? Was he okay? What if he’d been hurt – or worse?

“No,” I breathed, and shut my eyes. The thought that Mr. Stevens might have fallen in harm’s way hadn’t truly crossed my mind until now.

What if whoever had hurt Kearns had been after Mr. Stevens as well?

I immediately decided that for the time being I would not think about such things. It was too worrisome, too frightening, and it was
not
true. It couldn’t be true. Mr. Stevens was fine, and he’d call when he could. It was just that simple.

The shower cut off, snapping me back to the present moment. I looked at the clock; fifteen minutes had gone by, but it had felt like an instant. I went to the bedroom to choose my own nightclothes before Katarina emerged from the shower. Suddenly I was feeling very, very tired. I stood at the dresser, leaning against it and looking down into the drawer, staring at the clothes but not actually seeing anything. The sound of the bathroom door opening shook me out of my daze.

“Hey,” came her voice. I turned to face her, and had to do a double-take when I saw her standing there in the doorway. Fresh from the shower, she looked radiant. Looking at her now, it was easy to see why Mr. Stevens had been enamored with her. She was one of those women who just naturally ooze sex appeal, even when they’re not trying. My baby blue nightgown and robe were perfectly fitted for her body, hugging every curve and dipping just low enough to show the smooth skin below her collarbones. Her hair was still damp, hanging in curly tendrils around her head. She clasped her hands together in front of her and looked at me with wide eyes, uncertain and somehow vulnerable.

“The shower’s free,” she said, an inane comment that brought me back down to earth. I realized I’d been staring at her, taking in her body in a way that was entirely inappropriate, especially considering the circumstances.

I spun around quickly to the dresser and pulled out the first gown I could find, a hot pink number with little straps. “Great!” I chirped, and walked past her as quickly as I could. My face was on fire with a red-hot blush that gave away everything I had been thinking. I hoped she hadn’t noticed.

“Feel free to sleep in the bed tonight,” I called out to her, closing the bathroom door behind me before she could say a word.

What the hell, Candace?
I asked myself, shaking my head as I turned on the shower. The room was still steamy from Katarina’s time under the water, and I looked into the fogged-up mirror as I undressed. My comb and brush were lying on the counter next to the sink – she must have used them to comb out her hair after the shower. I stared at them for a moment, curiously comforted by the idea that she had used my things.

Stepping into the shower, I tried to forget the outside world completely. I stayed under the water until my body felt heavy and the steam made it hard to breathe. I tried hard not to think about Mr. Stevens, but he crept into my thoughts anyway. Still, the shower did me good. The steam cradled my naked body like a warm embrace. I didn’t step out of the shower until my water heater started to give up the ghost, and what came out of the showerhead was cooling down fast.

I dressed in the hot pink gown, digging my bare toes into the plush bathmat. This was
not
the most appropriate gown for the occasion. It was sexy, skimpy – something that should be worn for a man in bed, not on a night like this one. But it was the first thing I had grabbed in my haste to get out of the bedroom. And honestly, Katarina might not even notice it. She was still disturbed by everything that had happened tonight – either that, or she was already asleep.
Come on, Candace,
I scolded.
Stop being so weird and just go out there.

I stepped quietly out of the bathroom to find her sitting up in the bed with the light on. She was covered to the waist in blankets, simply looking around the room. Quietly contemplating things, perhaps. “Hey, you,” she said. “How was the shower?” Her eyes were dark, but at least there were no tears in them this time.

“Fantastic,” I replied truthfully. “But now I’m exhausted.” She gave me a shaky smile, but then a sudden look of uncertainty flashed across her face.

“Um, Candace…” she stammered, “do you, uh… do you think we could both sleep in the bed tonight? I… I kind of feel weird sleeping alone.” She blushed as she spoke, looking embarrassed.

“Sure,” I replied. What else could I say? Telling her I would sleep on the couch would make her feel worse than she already did, and that was the last thing she needed right now. And to tell the truth, maybe I needed some comfort, too. We
’ll
be like best buddies in college, I thought to myself.
S
leeping in the same bed and whispering about our men into the wee hours of the morning
…

…Except we have the same man.
The intrusive thought came to me as I slipped underneath the covers with her. How many times had she shared intimacies with Mr. Stevens? The jealousy reared up again, but I quickly pushed it aside. There was no room for those feelings, not now.