Shadow Touched (13 page)

Ellie gnawed on her lower lip, gaze distracted. “She’s very old.”

Twilight and its inhabitants were as ancient as the world.
Old
was an understatement.

“She wanted something new,” Ellie told them, speaking over the babbling talk of the shadow and the fae.

“Dying isn’t
new
,” Col. Langer argued.

Ellie continued. “She saw the way, the bright colors, the heat, the sun beating down in the sky. She wasn’t frightened. And then two humans full of death appeared before her.”

“Children!” Col. Langer again. “Not full of death.”

“Mortals,” Cam corrected. Ellie meant they were mortal, that they could and would die eventually.

“And since death was what the fae wanted,” Ellie said, “she switched places. Became the boy.”

That was the moment of crossing, one world to another. And something about this area of Sedona facilitated it. There was more work to be done here.

Ellie inhaled deeply, filling her lungs with the waterfall-scented air. “Brought water to the desert as a gift.”

Col. Langer grunted. “Cornville and Page Springs have enough water now.”

“But the mother didn’t want him.”

Ms. Parson.

“She wouldn’t recognize him as her son, abandoned him, when he would have been a good son, grown strong, given her great gifts, and died an old man.”

Another grunt from Langer. “So he—she—
it
wanted to live first, then die.”

Cam worked for patience. Yes, the fae had started out male and was now female. No “it” necessary.

Ellie shook her head. “The lifetime would have passed quickly for her. And then, nothing. She’s dying now, her Shadow wisping away every moment.”

“Will she go back?” Cam asked. “Will she return to Twilight?”

“She does not like it here,” Ellie said. “The . . .
mage,
I think . . . would have trapped her for his own purposes. The mage won’t give up. The fae feels trapped already. The mage will use her. The mage wants power. But the fae does not know what power is, so how can she give him this gift?”

“Why did the fae impersonate the doctor?” Cam asked.

“So that the mage wouldn’t find her. How would the mage know which one was her if there were two of the same person?”

Dr. March shook his head at the reasoning, but Cam understood its simplicity. The fae hadn’t thought through to the next step of the encounter with the mage: a challenge.

“But the mage
did
find her,” Ellie said. “Slit her throat first, but that is not how the fae can die. She would’ve happily died if that was all it took. She would’ve liked to die like a human.”

“Will she go back?” Cam repeated.

Ellie paused, listening to the ramble. “I think so. She has changed already. She has learned fear and loss.” Ellie shook her head, frustrated. “There are other strong feelings, but I can’t find names for them. She has smelled death. That is enough.”

“Can she lead you to JT?”

“She can lead me to herself, whatever that means.” Ellie’s forehead tensed. “But I don’t think she’s trying to trick us. I think she’s referring to the original switch. That she only has to look for a part of herself that remained behind, and that JT has it.”

Excellent. This gave Ellie a path of sorts to traverse in Twilight, the originating point being the fae, and the destination, the fae’s own Shadow, which was in JT’s keeping. It was as direct as they could get where Twilight was concerned.

“Can you tell her that we’ll make the switch back soon,” Cam said. “That we’ll head to the waterfall shortly?”

“Now,” Ellie answered back. “She says now. The mage is near. Now.”

Ellie’s shadow torqued her head at on odd angle, trying to fight Ellie’s hold. “Danger,” she snarled. She wrenched again. “The bad man. Here.”

Cam flashed with cold adrenaline. Col. Langer spoke into his throat mic. Dr. March reached for the door, but froze, green-faced, when Cam shot him a heavy look. The safest place to be was in the company of Ellie’s shadow.

The shadow jerked her head into another angle, fighting Ellie. “Danger!”

“Okay,” Cam said. “We do this now.” His new team had been prepared all morning. Dr. Hasler, the mage specialist, was going to have a helluva first day. The only thing that had to be delayed was Cam’s talk with Ellie, but all he really needed to say was three words.

“One more thing,” Ellie said.

Cam nodded. “Quickly.” They had to get to the waterfall. Get them on their way. Once the fae had gone into Twilight, the mage could have no other interest here. The faster they moved, the safer everyone would be.

“She wants to give you a gift,” Ellie said. “For fighting so bravely to keep the mage from getting to her and taking her away. She says you were clumsy.”

Cam had mostly been fighting to keep
Ellie
from harm, and yeah, he’d been beaten soundly. So any gift from the fae was unwarranted, and the idea made him nervous anyway. Very. A little leeway from Ellie, however, he’d take in a heartbeat.

“Her last gift flooded two towns,” Col. Langer said.

Good point.

“No gift necessary,” Cam said. “But thank her.”

“A gift,” Ellie insisted. “She won’t leave until you agree.”

Cam’s gut tightened, but he nodded. If it would help Ellie find JT and bring them both back safe and sound, okay. And if it would help them hurry up. He knew the gift would come with a price tag, who knew how high.

The fae/doctor stepped forward, this time speaking in that strange language to Cam, though he didn’t comprehend a word that was said.

Cam looked over at Ellie, who shrugged and shook her head—the meaning seemed to be lost on her as well. Not good. He wanted to back away, to refuse. But in the interest of brevity, he smiled and nodded again. Get on with it.

The fae lifted a hand and touched Cam’s temple.

Cam had the oddest sensation of thin, fuzzy tendrils crawling into his skull behind his eyes. The sensation stopped his heart for a second, trapped his breath in his throat, too. The Shadow sizzled in his brain—because that’s what it had to be, Shadow. Magic. In his head.

Took only a second after all.

His vision blurred so that the doctor no longer stood before him, but rather a child-sized humanoid, a little like JT, but all bald, with hollow cheeks and belly. Not a he or she, really . . . more like Langer’s “it.” The fae had taken on something of JT in the transfer, and Cam guessed that JT would be a little fae now, too. Ms. Parson might get her child back unharmed, but not unchanged.

Everything was changing.

Cam turned his new sight upon Ellie’s shadow and was not surprised in the least at the beauty that burned before him. Her composition wasn’t merely grey. No, her exquisite form swirled with infinitesimal flashes of brilliant color he’d been too blind to see before. She wasn’t made of some variant of darkness. Ellie’s shadow gleamed.

No wonder the fae had embraced her upon meeting. Cam wanted to embrace her again, too.

Yesterday, he’d fought an invisible foe and lost. Today he saw everything.

E
llie, with the fae beside her, stumbled down toward the falls surrounded by a cluster of men—Cam’s new so-called team. Cam kept close, but had been a little twitchy since the fae had touched him. His green eyes had gone black, which, combined with the swelling and discoloration of his face, made him look like a stranger. Her anger over what had happened last night put even more distance between them.

A second ring of men, soldiers, protected their progress, guns pointed outward at the surrounding area. Instructions buzzed over their ear pieces. And out in front, in all her naked glory, her shadow led the way. A minute more and they’d be at the falls.

“What did she do to you?” Ellie asked Cam.
She
meaning the fae, who seemed to be aging with every step. Shadow streaked away from the doctor’s body like the crackling tail of a comet.

“Something to my sight,” he answered. “Don’t worry about it. I can still see.”

The fae had stopped talking, stopped trying to communicate too, as if everything was too much effort.

“What do you mean, your ‘sight’?” Ellie demanded. Her concern ratcheted her previous anger up to fury. How could she be so furious and care so much at the same time? Her only relief was that her shadow wasn’t concerned about him, and her shadow’s instincts were always right.

“My sight’s better,” he said. “I see more at once, that’s all. Time will tell if there are any other side effects.”

He seemed to dismiss her then, which ticked her off even more. He glared around the site as they passed, presumably looking for the mage. But if the mage were here, her shadow would have him in a choke hold by now. Or worse.

On the dry side of the waterfall, the concealing curtain was parted, allowing entry. A torrent rushed on the other side. Spray was in the air, grabbing her lashes. The water was clear, sparkling as it fell, earthy red as it churned away and re-contoured the lower landscape for miles. Front and center, the Shadowlands. The seductive smell of magic made her head dizzy.

The rest of the team was already in place: emergency medical staff, Dr. March and Dr. Hasler, and Ms. Parson, to make certain that JT wasn’t too frightened by all the unfamiliar faces to cross back over. She looked years older, but no less determined. Carter, the brother, was now in the care of his father, who was staying in an overflow hotel in Flagstaff.

Ellie’s shadow reached her hand into the water, but it rushed right through her palm.

Cam turned his back on the falls to speak. How could she trust him with those eyes?

“So far so good,” he said, “and you’ll be safe once your shadow and the fae cross.”

Right. Except for the mage who might be lurking nearby, the conditions couldn’t be more auspicious. The fae was cooperative and had indicated that it could find itself in Twilight, which meant it could lead her to JT. Her shadow needed no supplies, required no last minute preparations. Why then, didn’t Ellie feel ready?

Because she had a big personal decision to make. She’d send her shadow off . . . but would she allow her shadow back into the world? This was her chance to get rid of it. No more sexy talk. No more humping and jutting and splayed legs. No more violent killer. She could send that part of herself far, far away and never be bothered again. So tempting.

The fae had no problem taking her shadow’s translucent, insubstantial hand. Maybe her shadow really belonged in Twilight, not the mortal world. Maybe this was best for her, too.

“Cam,” her shadow said, looking back, frightened.

“Danger?” he asked.

Her shadow nodded.

Ellie pushed her dark half into the falls so her shadow couldn’t alert him to her plan. This was one thing she’d choose on her own.

She could see the two figures within the water, at the threshold of eternity. Emotion tumbled into Ellie, coarse, unrefined—passion, horror, hope, desperation—until she was weeping with the fullness of it.

This was the argument both for and against keeping her shadow.

The fae seemed to inhale long and deep and thereby grow. Its limbs extended, height stretched, features filling, until it was a moon-pale naked thing, genderless, exotic, and awe inspiring. Very old.

Ellie’s shadow took one step into the forest.

And Ellie jerked forward, like something was caught just under her rib that tied them together. Burned, just there.

Another soft step.

And Ellie jerked again, stopped only by Cam’s arm suddenly strong around her middle.

He was saying something, but with all the battering feeling within, she couldn’t hear him. She turned to beg for help. His black eyes were angry, the bruises on his face making a nice man look mean.

She looked back at the falls in dread, started to shake her head no, but—

The fae loped off into the trees, and Ellie’s shadow followed, just as graceful.

In the mortal world, the high desert filled with a scream of agony.

Ellie was yanked forward, toward the falls. She and Cam skidded into the water and fell into the blood-colored wake on the other side, unable to cross.

Yet the dreadful pull within continued, leaving her breathless, her mind spinning. It hurt, it ripped, it was tearing her to pieces inside. She, the master of her shadow, was now the part that was leashed.

But she had nowhere to go, no self to follow.

 

“Call her back,” Cam yelled at Ellie. “Call your shadow back.”

“No!” screamed Ms. Parson.

They foundered in the water at the top of the waterfall’s deluge. The ground below was slick and treacherous, but the water was not immediately deep. He’d cracked his knee, but managed to drag her out, dripping, and into helping hands.

Her skin was going grey, breath broken. The cording of her muscles told him she was still in great pain.

“Call her back,” he said again. But Ellie was beyond responding. He hadn’t had time to tell her . . .

He shook her sharply. “Call her back.”

Other people had crossed into Twilight just fine—people who worked at Segue and lived to tell the tale—or he never would have attempted this. It was returning to the mortal world, alive and sane, that was the hard part. Thorne never would’ve suggested it. JT would’ve been declared lost at the outset.
In
was supposed to be easy. And Ellie had the
out
covered.

The new team medic elbowed him out of the way. Flashlight to eyes. Pulse. Oxygen at her face. Cam looked into the waterfall to see if he could find her shadow and compel her to return, then froze when he spotted a man a short way from the site, leaning on a tree. At his ease. Watching.

Cam tried not to look directly at him and lose the advantage.

Soldiers protected the waterfall, rifles at the ready, but they didn’t seem to notice the intruder, who was five steps away and in full view. He had a laceration on his forehead, an abrasion on a cheekbone. Looked stiff too. Go, shadow.

Cam dropped his gaze to Ellie, who’d started shivering in the warm morning sun as the medic worked on her. A chill went down Cam’s back too. He turned more fully to face Col. Langer, who’d been issuing orders in his mic for backup and support.

“By the tree,” Cam said, low. In his line of sight was Ms. Parson, who’d put a hand over her mouth and was rocking herself forward and backward in her distress.

Col. Langer flicked a glance beyond him. “What now?”

“Mage.” Cam held out his hand. “Can I borrow your gun?”

“There’s nothing to shoot at.”

Cam twitched. “I’m gifted.”

At Segue he’d trained in the basics of firearms, too. Thorne sent his people into Hell, but he sent them prepared.

Col. Langer handed over the gun. Cam knew it for a Kimber 1911, though it was obviously modified. He checked the chamber. Disengaged the thumb safety. And turned, sighting down the barrel.

The mage was gone.

Cam scanned quickly. There, in his peripheral vision. The mage stood at the side of an unsuspecting soldier. He was calm, confident in his slow approach.

Cam didn’t understand. The fae had crossed into Twilight already. What could the mage want here? There was no more magic left for the taking. Not unless he wanted passage into Twilight.

Better ask.

Again, Cam aimed directly at the mage. “What do you want?”

The nearest soldier looked over his shoulder, frowned at Cam, but kept his position at a word from Langer.

The mage kept a poker face, turned slightly, and stepped back, as if that was all it took to disappear.

Cam fired—
pop!
—just shy of the mage’s shoulder. He’d always enjoyed target practice. No sore muscles or aching bones. “Next time I’ll hit you. What do you want here?”

“Shoot him,” Langer said. “Then we can all see him.”

Cam weighed the counsel, shrugged. “Good point.” He steadied his grip. Aimed . . .

“Wait,” the mage said, hands up in surrender. “I’m only here to help. A gesture of good will after messing up your face.”

“Doubtful,” Cam said. “You killed Dr. Velez with that wicked knife of yours.”

“I thought the fae was attacking her.” He soft-footed backward, finding the tree again. “I couldn’t tell who was who and made a grave mistake.”

Cam wasn’t buying. “That’s not the fae’s story.”

“You trust a fae? Just look at that dying woman.”

Cam wanted to look at Ellie, wanted to look so bad that his head hurt. But he wasn’t about to take his eyes off the mage. That’s why the fae had touched his temple and altered his sight. That’s why she’d said he’d been clumsy—because he couldn’t see.

“The fae didn’t hold a knife to my throat,” Cam pointed out.

Dr. Hasler came up to Cam’s side. “Ask him about his House, his family line.”

“Fuck his House,” Cam said. He aimed again. “Why are you here?”

“I can help your woman before she dies,” he said. “I can bring her shadow back.”

So tempting. This guy obviously knew magic and something about the fae. If anyone could help Ellie, it was him.

But Cam’s gut said danger. The fae had said danger. And most important, Ellie’s shadow had said danger.
A bad man.

“No, thank you,” Cam said. He lowered his aim, pulled the trigger, and got the bastard in the thigh.

Cam whipped around to check on Ellie and see how she fared.

Her eyes had gone dull, her body locked in a single chill.

 

Hot colors seared through Ellie’s mind. Her shadow carried her forward. They rushed into gorgeous death together, consciousness unified, but the shadow in control. This was an exquisite feeling. Her body was useless, heavy, good riddance. Why had she always favored it? Why go back to that pain and suffering? Everything was hard there. Here, effortless. Magic.

Here they were one. She’d been right all along: Her shadow had the best of everything. Feeling, movement, joy. And now Ellie did too.

She followed the fae, who bounded fleet and free through the trees and undergrowth like an antelope. They seemed to run forever and also seemed to come to a stop almost immediately. The trees grew darker, curious creatures peeping out to look at her and chatter. She could not fill her lungs enough with that deep Shadow scent.

“He’s here,” the fae said, its odd head bending down to hers.

“Who?” Ellie wondered.

The fae’s head cocked the other way. “I am.”

They still spoke the same language, so she knew the fae meant JT. Ellie was supposed to take him home. His mother was grieving for him. She believed that Ellie could bring him back. Cam hoped so, too, as much as he was worried about her. And all those others like Langer who used to look at her out of slit eyes. Everyone was waiting for her.

Finding JT was her purpose, her first ever. She didn’t want to fail at it, something important to do for the first time, so she got hold of herself...

. . . and in so doing she knew that somewhere far away, her body, her way back to the mortal world, was dying.

 

“Shadow!” Cam yelled into the falls.

The medic had loosened Ellie’s shirt and elevated her legs.

And from his sprawl in the dirt, the mage laughed.

Ellie felt the monstrous roiling will of her shadow condense as her reason worked for understanding. Sending her shadow into Twilight was not the means to separate them once and for all. Sending her shadow into Twilight would kill them both.

Did she want to die? No, she did not.

“JT!” Ellie called. “Time to go home.”

Growls rolled toward her from the darkness all around, and the chatter of the other creatures went silent.

Dogs. That’s right, he had nightmares about big dogs. Here, the big dogs were real.

“JT, we have to hurry,” Ellie said. “Your mom wants her knight in shining armor to come home. She sent me to bring you back.”