Shadows from the Grave (19 page)

“I was so ashamed,” she said. “When I told Rafe, he got angry. Told me I’d ruined a good thing, like he hadn’t had any part in the conception. Before I could blink, he was gone. As clichéd as it sounds, he left town in the dead of night.”

“Ah, Annie. I’m sorry you had to deal with that,” he said sadly. “How did your parents take it?”

“Oh, it devastated them both. I was so afraid to tell them. I just knew Mom would throw all those years of piousness in my face, and she would’ve been well within her rights to do so. But she didn’t. She was heartbroken for me.”

“Because she’d been there?” he asked. Annie nodded. With hesitation, he asked, “Do you mind if I ask what happened? What you decided to do?”

Annie heard the odd note in his voice and pulled back to look at him. “What’s wrong?” she asked with a concerned frown. When she put it together, she gasped. “Oh, God. Kiely. I’m sorry! I shouldn’t have said anything.”

Chase interrupted, “Stop apologizing. I know you aren’t like her, Annie. It’s just that I know this didn’t end well, and it obviously still hurts you. I don’t want to see you hurt more by talking about it.” He drew in a sharp breath when Annie reached up and touched his face with her fingertips. She placed a very gentle kiss on the corner of his mouth.

“I adore you, Chase Hudson,” she said. “And I’m actually okay to talk to you about this. I’ve never told anyone about this, but I want to tell you. I
need
to.”

“Then please do.” He tucked her head back into his shoulder. “You’ve never told anyone?”

“No, not even Beth and Lauren. I don’t want them to know. It would only hurt them, and it isn’t necessary,” she said. “After Rafe left, and I had confessed everything to Mom and Ralph, I had some tough decisions to make. I was about twelve weeks pregnant by then, and I knew I had to make a choice one way or another. God forgive me, Chase, I didn’t want that baby. I didn’t want to be a parent, didn’t want the responsibility of another human being. I hated that child growing inside me.”

She shifted in his arms. “There were a dozen times when I started the drive to Cincinnati to have an abortion. I even made it all the way to the clinic once.”

“What stopped you?”

“Mom. Very simply, Mom did. I kept seeing her face when I had told her about the pregnancy, and I kept thinking that she could have chosen to abort me, but she didn’t. I had a lot more support and love in my life than she did, and getting rid of the pregnancy just because it was inconvenient for me? I couldn’t do it.” Annie hadn’t realized she was crying until Chase handed her a napkin. She thanked him and wiped her face.

“So I went back home that day and told Mom I wanted to give the baby up for adoption. She made some phone calls and didn’t try to talk me out of it. Ralph has a cousin in Virginia who counsels teen and single mothers, and Mom made the arrangements. By the time I was five months pregnant, we had flown to Virginia, and I was enrolled in a program that helped young women who find themselves pregnant, don’t want to have an abortion, and don’t want to or can’t keep the baby.”

“What did you do about school?” he asked.

“I finished out the spring semester like nothing had happened,” she said. “I was about twenty pounds heavier then, and I didn’t wear tight clothes, so hiding the pregnancy wasn’t an issue.”

“So you made it to Virginia. What then?”

“The further along I got, the more certain I was that I had made the right decision. Mom was with me and was going to stay until I had the baby. Do you know how much of a sacrifice that had to be for her, and for Ralph?” she asked.

“She probably didn’t see it that way,” he assured her. “She loves you. You needed her.”

Annie smiled sadly. “I know. But
I
see it that way.” She paused. “But those months in Virginia, we grew so close. We rebuilt our relationship, became friends. It was wonderful, at least that part of it was. Things just didn’t turn out the way I’d planned.”

“They rarely do, I’ve found,” he remarked.

“Isn’t that the truth?” she asked. She let out a deep sigh. “Ralph had flown down to spend a couple weeks with us for the Fourth of July. The day before he was scheduled to fly back, we all went out to eat. It was such a perfect day, hot, sunny, breeze blowing off the ocean. We were so happy. I was seven months pregnant, but I had really started to feel hopeful that things would be okay. I’d be able to return to Indiana after I had the baby, and I could go on with my life. I had even started to get past Rafe’s abandonment, or at least see it with less emotional eyes. It still hurt,” she said, “but it had grown to more of a dull ache, you know?”

“I do know.” He tenderly pushed a curl off her forehead. “So what happened?”

“We were scheduled to meet with prospective parents a couple days after Ralph left, and we all decided to make an early night of it. Mom and I were staying at Ralph’s cousin’s house, and since we wouldn’t see him again until the baby was born, they wanted to spend some time together. So we headed back to the house…” Her voice trailed off as she thought about that evening. “We never saw it coming. One minute we were laughing, and the next thing I knew, it felt like we were flying.”

Chase frowned. “You wrecked?”

“Mmm-hmm. Guy ran a red light, slammed straight into us. Two seconds sooner, he would have hit the front passenger side, and Mom would probably have been killed. Two seconds later, and it would have been a close call. As it happened, he hit the car right where the right rear wheel well meets the back door frame. There are so many what-ifs, Chase. If I had been sitting behind Mom like I usually did, I’d be dead. But we’d bought an antique chair, and it only fit behind her seat, because Ralph is so tall. That stupid chair saved my life. Mom still has it. Says she’ll never get rid of it.” Chase tightened his arms around her, and Annie hugged him back.

“We thought we were all okay, aside from a few cuts and bruises,” she continued. “The guy who hit us wasn’t so lucky. He was killed on impact.”

Chase cleared his throat. “I take it things weren’t okay?”

“No, they weren’t. When he hit us, he pushed our car into another car that was parked near the intersection. I couldn’t get my door open, and we had to wait for the EMTs. They got there and cut the door open and, of course, everyone was freaking out because I was pregnant. I remember the paramedic asking me over and over again if I felt okay. I was a little nauseated, but I felt fine. They put a collar on my neck and laid me on a backboard before trying to get me out of the car. The next thing I remember was being in the ambulance, and Mom looking down, white as a sheet. Then it all faded away.

“When I woke up, it was the next day, late the next day. I was in the ICU, and the baby was gone. I didn’t get too anxious. I remembered the wreck and thought they’d probably just had to take him early, but he was really gone, Chase.” Her voice choked. “He never even had a chance.”

Chase felt the shock to the soles of his feet. “Oh God, Annie. I’m so sorry,” he said, and buried his face in her hair. For several minutes, they just held each other, not speaking.

“It doesn’t end there,” she said quietly. “See, when the guy hit us, the impact tore the placenta loose from my uterus. You know what a placenta is, right?”

“Um, it’s the thing that surrounds the baby in the womb, right?”

“Yes, it is. It’s the lifeline—supplies blood and nutrients to the fetus. It implants into the wall of the uterus after conception, and it grows from there,” she explained. “When mine tore loose, I started hemorrhaging. I remember being surprised because something like that should hurt, but it hadn’t. The doctor couldn’t even explain why it hadn’t. Anyhow, babies can’t survive very long under those conditions. No blood means no oxygen. By the time the ambulance arrived, it was already too late. They rushed me into surgery as soon as we reached the hospital, but they couldn’t stop the bleeding. They had to do a hysterectomy in order to stop it, or I would have bled to death right there on the operating table. As it was, it was a close thing.” She turned her face away from his.

“So you see, whether to have children or not isn’t really an option for me anymore. I’m okay with that. I just wish I’d been given the choice, instead of having had it made for me.” She had gone stiff as she had shared the news of her infertility, and Chase didn’t know what to say or how to react. He carefully eased her face back toward his and tipped her chin up so that she met his gaze.

“I have no words,” he whispered. He wiped her tears away with his thumbs. When Annie raised her hand to his face and wiped his cheek, Chase was startled. She looked at the wetness on her fingers with an astonished expression before she reached up to touch his face again. This time, she moved her hand into his hair and tugged, sitting up to meet his mouth with her own as she pulled his face down to hers. The kiss they shared was tender and gentle. Somewhat tentative at first, it quickly grew deeper. When she pulled back, he followed. Neither of them wanted to end the kiss. Before long, an urgency crept in, and finally Chase tore his mouth away with a groan. They were both breathing hard. Annie buried her face in his neck with a groan of her own.

“Annie,” he warned, and he felt her smile against his skin.

“Chase,” she countered.

He gave a rough laugh and tipped his head back against the wall. “We have to talk about this, you know.”

Annie sighed. “I know. But not right now. Soon,” she promised. They sat like that for a few minutes, recovering from the revelations that had been made.

Chase rubbed his hand over her back. “We should probably pack things up here,” he said, reluctant to move. “As much as I love holding you—and believe me, I do—I can’t sit here any longer. This floor isn’t the most comfortable seat in the world.”

With a reluctance that warmed his heart, she eased out of his arms and started packing the cooler. As he joined her, she paused to study him.

He shot her a questioning look. “What?”

Annie shook her head. “Nothing.” she smiled. Chase didn’t press the issue, and they finished clearing up the picnic in silence. After a quick walk through the house to make sure it was secure, Chase carried the cooler out to the car and loaded it in the trunk.

“I guess I’d better get you home,” he said.

“I guess so,” she replied, a wistful tone creeping into her voice. “I do have to do laundry this weekend, and I was going to paint my toenails, wash my hair, something like that.”

“Um, well. Not that I want you to have dirty laundry or hair, or heaven forbid, unpainted toenails, but I happen to know this guy who has a big TV, a semi-sweet, semi-possessed cat, Chinese food on speed dial, and a very comfortable couch. If you were interested, I’d say I could probably convince him to rent a movie or two.”

Annie turned to face him. “I figured you would probably be ready for a break from me by now.” To her surprise, Chase slowed the car and pulled off to the side of the road.

He put the car in neutral and looked at her, puzzled. “Why on earth would you think that? Don’t you realize that I enjoy being with you, Annie?” He paused as a thought occurred to him. “Or is it that you need a break from my company? If that’s it, don’t worry about hurting my feelings.”

Shaking her head furiously, she reached out to touch his hand, which was resting on the gearshift. “No, Chase. No. Look, I… can we just go back five minutes? Ask me again?”

Somewhat warily, Chase watched her. He reached for a bottle of water and took a long drink, gathering his courage. Speaking with a casualness that was deceptive, he asked, “How would you feel about a movie or two, and some takeout at my place?” He looked down at the bottle in his hands while he waited for her to respond.

“I would love to spend the evening with you, Chase,” she said. She held her hand out, and he carefully took it, sliding their fingers together in a solid grasp.

“Then I would say we have a date.”

When Gordon’s phone rang at nearly midnight Saturday night, he knew it wasn’t good news. When he saw Detective Hart’s name on the readout, he considered not answering, but he knew that wasn’t really an option. When they had seen each other at the second autopsy, to say there had been tension would be a massive understatement.

With a sigh, he answered. “This is Gordon.”

“Agent,” Greg Hart said. “Sorry to call you so late, but I have news.”