Read Shadows in the Cave Online
Authors: Meredith and Win Blevins
“Reborn?” said Aku. “You think that’s what happened?”
Shonan said, “That’s just speculation. All of this is what you think you see.”
Aku and Oghi looked at each other. The Red Chief hadn’t seen, he had no way to know.
Oghi tapped his fingers on the stone floor. Finally he said tentatively, “If you master your fear, I mean, if you don’t let your mind panic, maybe you go back and start a new life.”
“Maybe if you do it enough times,” said Aku.
“We don’t know,” said Oghi.
Tsola said in their minds,
Only Tsi-Li has the mastery of the knowledge of life and death
.
“But there’s nothing here to be afraid of,” said Aku aloud.
They’re already dead
.
Shonan said something. Oghi said something back. They traded more words. Yah-Su watched, apparently relaxed. Aku heard none of it because he was listening to Tsola in his mind.
None of the above
, she said again.
What do you mean?
You always have a choice whether to be afraid, or take a chance and go after what you want. It’s the eternal struggle. Which is stronger, your desire to kiss the girl or your fear that she will turn away? Which is stronger, your desire to have a child, or your fear that the child will die or turn into a whirlwind of troubles? Your desire to sing a song beautifully? Or your fear of sounding bad?
Aku mulled on that and decided to throw something into the conversation. “Once Tsola told me, ‘It’s not death people are afraid of. It’s life.’”
“Talk, talk, talk,” said Shonan.
From behind them a voice said loudly, “I think you clowns need some help.”
It was an alligator.
24
“C
all me Koz,” he said.
He was as long as three men were tall. The mouth looked big enough to swallow a deer whole, and the teeth sharp enough to shred it for stew. He appeared to be grinning. Luckily, he was a dozen steps away.
Koz said, “I’m the boss down here. The top-dog predator of all Earth in charge of hell, whaddya think of that?”
All four of them were tongue-tied.
“Don’t have the gift of gab, I see. Okay, I’ve come to make you an offer—with, natch, the permission of the big owl himself.”
He grinned, showing his teeth horribly. He seemed tickled at himself.
Shonan decided to deflate him. “Why do you talk funny?”
“I’m jiving in from a different time, which we Immortals can always do.” He looked into their uncomprehending faces.
“Never mind, back to business. You are looking for Salya, your daughter”—he pointed his snout at Shonan—“and your sister.” He indicated Aku. “Here are the words you’ve been hoping to hear. I know where she is, I can take you to her. And I’m glad to do it.” He waggled his tail like a monstrous puppy enjoying himself. “For a price.”
Shonan found his tongue. “What do you want?”
“One of you. You want to take someone out of the Underworld? No problem. All you got to do, aside from satisfying Tsi-Li, is to leave someone behind. Any one of the four of you stays down here with me, I don’t care which.”
“You’re a monster,” said Shonan.
“An alligator,” corrected Koz. “And the boss of the Underworld.”
Shonan raised a knife.
“What are you, a jerk?” Koz flicked his tail sideways and knocked Shonan’s legs out from under him. The Red Chief splatted to the stone. “Pay attention. I told you the big owl sent me to help you.”
Raising onto his elbows, Shonan said, “I don’t know if we need a helper like you.”
“Whatcha gonna do without me? You gonna walk this whole place? If you stayed down here long enough to breed a hundred generations, which it don’t look like you got the broads to do, all of you and your descendants couldn’t walk enough of the Underworld to find one this person.”
“Why should we trust you?” said Shonan, getting up.
“Hey,
don’t
trust me. But here’s the news of the day. I know where your daughter is, and you don’t.”
The four adventurers stared at the alligator.
“We’ll talk it over,” said Shonan.
“Be my guests,” said Koz.
They huddled and talked softly, with the incessant din of the condemned to cover their discussion.
“We don’t have any choice,” said Shonan.
The other three nodded.
“I am willing to make this sacrifice,” the war chief went on.
“I am not willing to lose my father,” said Aku. He was surprised at the heat of his own voice.
Yah-Su and Oghi started to say something, too, but Shonan held up a hand.
“Why don’t we talk about this later, quietly, when we have time?”
“Talk about who’s going to sacrifice his life?” said Aku.
“Yes.” Shonan regarded his son. “Dying isn’t the worst thing. Living like a coward is.”
He turned to Koz. “Offer accepted,” he said, “on the condition that you actually find her for us.”
“Then off we go,” said the alligator in a perky voice. “The short way or the easy way?”
“The short way,” said Shonan.
“Every hundred years we get a visitor here, and he always says, ‘the short way.’” He shook his head as if to say,
Oh, brother
. “Regardless, down here, any company from outside is a bit of fun. Follow me.”
He started off. “You know, this place, vast as it is, tunnels in every directions, cracks in twice as many directions, lakes, rivers, everything you can imagine and a thousand times bigger, it’s not as complicated as your brains. All these people in here, or the lost spirits of people, they’re lost in their own heads. Have you ever seen the inside of a brain, all those little tiny blood pathways everywhere, more trails than there are on Earth, unbelievably complicated? No, you’re mortals, so you wouldn’t. Take my word for it, your brain is much bigger than the entire Underworld, and much worse to be lost inside of.”
“Enough,” said Shonan.
“Let’s go. It’s your asses.”
Koz told them to keep the lamps out, save them for when they really needed them. Shonan, Oghi, and Yah-Su followed Koz by his chatter. Above, Aku winged from perch to perch
and watched with his owl eyes. It was an eerie and uncanny scene. A dark brown alligator led human beings and an owl through an environment as hostile as anyone could imagine. It was totally dark, the kind of dark that disoriented you and made you think everything was an illusion, invited you to populate the darkness with all your worst imaginings. Dark as madness.
Aside from the fears engendered by the darkness, there were actual drop-offs, slides, climbs, rivers, and lakes. By far the worst of all was the inconceivable pandemonium of human misery, wraiths yowling, yelling, wailing, shrieking, sobbing, moaning without end.
It seemed to Aku it must be the greatest affliction he would ever face, wading through this testimony of woe. No, second greatest, he reminded himself. He couldn’t allow himself to think consciously,
The sacrifice of your father
.
Koz’s jibber-jabber was a godsend. Not only “Watch your head there” and “a bit slippery here” but chitchat about the amazing things he’d seen people do. “People, to me, are the most curious creatures ever invented. I know what goes on up there, you know. All us Immortals know without even having to look in your direction.
“When Thunderbird sent you to a different world and slipped mortality in with you—now
there’s
a nasty bit—he must have temporarily lost his mind. The mischief? It boggles the imagination.
“So there’s death, it’s waiting. Rebirth, yes, you know that, and it takes some sting out of death. So you carry on through your days on Earth frozen stiff by another fear, living. The one big gift, your chance to jump over the moon, and you’re boo-hoo scared of it. Whatever you’re doing, the song in your mind, it’s, ‘Be careful now, you might get hurt. You might mess up right in front of everybody.’
“Well, as you see, you pay for playing scaredy cat. Listen to your comrades, oh, ain’t they sufferin’, same in death as in life—ain’t that a hotsy paradox for you?
“Oh, the chorus of suffering.” He started dancing while he walked and got a chant going—“Illness, old age, hunger, thirst, war, drowning, lightning, sea storms, childbirth, attack by bears or panthers, floods, fire, cold, and the worst bugaboo of all—embarrassment. Oh, what a multitude awaits you, every part of it a little reminder—
things might go wrong!
“And the way you obsess. You remember the quarter moon you were sick, or limped from a cut in your foot, not the twelve and a half moons you felt fine. You remember the baby that died, not the six brothers and sisters you’ve got. You dwell on the great-grandparents who died, not the ones still ticking, or the four grandparents and two parents you still got. Brother, you human beings, you are something to watch.”
He let a moment of silence hum, and all four of his followers got nervous.
“I tell you what, though, there’s a favor mortality does you guys that is really something. Sometimes you sneak around some way and get past your fear. I don’t just mean warriors going into a fight—”
“About time you mentioned that,” said Shonan.
“Hey, who’s the guide here? Yeah, fighting for your family and tribe,” he went on to Shonan, “that’s good. Hunting animals for meat that might turn around and hunt you, that’s good. But what I mean is, there are some people who stand more on the foot of what they like than what they’re afraid of. Like people playing with kids in a totally carefree way. Like a woman making up a song to sing a child to sleep, and feeling something warm for that child. Like a guy who loves
his wife so much he gathers shells and makes a necklace for her. I’m talking about people liking the world they’re in—it’s a beauty, you know, and nothing more beautiful than the way it comes back to life every spring.” He stopped chattering for a moment, and they could hear his tail scraping along the stones. “I’m talking about people really liking each other. That’s when they rise out of their fear for the moment and enjoy. We Immortals, we gave you life, too, you know. And we gave you Mother Earth—oh, don’t she bring forth life! We gave her to you. Some of you appreciate instead of being afraid.
“Well, mouthy as I am”—he clacked his awsome teeth—“I must say that human beings, while being the nuttiest and most disgusting things on Earth, they still make me marvel. I’ve seen it over and over, they come down here to retrieve the ones they love. They never get out—they know they’ll never manage it, though they always hope they will, and I hope so, too. I even hope you boys might. Never seen anybody learn what you have learned, but I don’t know if it’ll be enough for the big owl, no way of figuring that.
“Anyway, they come down here out of love. Nothing else, love, pure and simple. They surround someone with such special feelings that they … There’s no explaining it, no understanding it, I just have to stand back and admire it, I do. They fill the world with ill will above and come down here bearin’ love. That’s human beings for you.”
“It’s better than the boss of the Underworld does,” said Aku. Everyone held his breath. Aku was surprised at himself. “Why should you make us give up a life to get one? Is that love?”
Koz sat up on his tail, whirled his awesome head, and snapped the air in front of Aku’s beak. The owl fluttered
back a few feet. Then Koz laughed, a fine belly-rumble from the gut. “A boy oughtn’ta get in the face of the boss. Even a boy who’s out of reach.”
Koz turned casually, slithered for a moment, and said, “Okay, pay attention, this is a rock slide. I get down it easy, but not you, not in the dark. Light a lamp and see where to put your hands and feet.”
He started down and looked back. “Yeah, that’s good. Now when we get to the bottom, you’re gonna fall a ways, maybe as far as I am tall. You’re gonna land in a river up to your chests. So your stuff, hold it tight and keep it high.”
But Aku flew above the water clutching his flutes.
They took a rest and some food. Before their sleep, away from Koz, Aku forced the issue. “I cannot sacrifice my father to get my sister back.”
Shonan looked impatient. “I’m the one. It’s obvious. Our two friends here are only friends. They’re generous beyond bounds to take these risks with us at all. It would be appalling to ask either of them to take one further step.”
Aku opened his mouth to speak, but Shonan stayed him with a hand on the knee.
“And you? What are you going to do, abandon your child before he’s born? Abandon your wife?”
“You’re abandoning me!” Aku sounded immature even to himself.
Shonan spoke peaceably. “You are a man. You are a father. You can take care of yourself, and in fact take care of a wife and children. No one depends on me anymore.” He paused. “No, not even you.”
“Ada …”
“Enough,” said Shonan. “We are in a great battle here. I
will die a warrior’s death and return to Earth immediately.” He made a downward motion with both hands, meaning, “No more.”
After their sleep, and the next sleep, and the next, the rock slide and the river were only a start on their troubles. Aku had a much easier time, able to fly where the others had to climb and able to see when they couldn’t. Shonan and Oghi wore themselves to a frazzle and got considerably scratched up on the arms and legs. Yah-Su seemed tireless, and was too hairy to get scratched much.
Aku was cruising along until he got really scared.
“Nothing to do but swim it,” Koz said. “Bit of underground river, not too awful.”
Aku studied it. The entry made the stream look like a tube, and that seemed terrible.
Immediately, Oghi started changing into a sea turtle, nose to beak, arms to legs, fingers to claws, back to carapace. Aku was just as busy changing into his human shape.
“Water’s high sometimes, low sometimes, occasionally there’s a bit of air along the middle stretch, you can get a big breath and go back down. Looks high today, though.
“What you do is, breathe in and out two or three times, suck up the biggest bit of air you can, and go, go, go. Current’s with you, there’s a break. Keep kicking and you’ll make it.
“The one rule is, do
not
try to turn around and go back. The current will flush you out backwards, but it will take a lot longer, and you’ll get the long lease here. Meaning get killed, understand?”
“Let’s go.”
Aku slipped in last and hesitated a long while. He breathed in and out until he began to feel dizzy, waited a moment,
filled every speck of space in his lungs with precious air, and dove.
Right away he was totally disoriented. He had no sense of what direction was up, down, or sideways. A couple of times he scraped his fingertips on the sides, and once he bumped his head.
After a while he began to see colors, a lot of colors, pure, like the ones you see in a rainbow, floating across his mind in bars, very beautiful, perfectly lovely, everything was lovely, he was very well, he was …
Rough hands grabbed him and heaved him forward.
When his head came out of the water, he heaved in a canyon full of air, eased it out slowly, and did the same again.
Yah-Su was holding Aku in his arms, and he said a whole lot of words in a row. “What did you do, stop kicking? When I grabbed you, you were drifting.”
Shonan explained to Aku that Yah-Su got worried, dunked down in, and walked a few steps up the river before he bumped into the limp Aku.
“I got fascinated by the lights.”
“They shine your way to being dead, guy,” said Koz. “But, hey, you’re welcome here.”
After they followed the stream a while, they had to jump. Koz insisted that Aku not change into owl shape and fly down. “No place to light,” he said. “It’s all been slicked smooth as bat dung by hundreds of winters of runoff. If you try, you’ll just wing it back up here and have to jump anyway.”
Aku believed him. He went last, hearing splash after splash of body into water. Then he was sorry because he was left alone at the top in the dark, about to hurtle into absolute darkness. “Hello, down there,” he called. They all called back. “Will someone please come back up here and push me off?”