Shaxoa's Gift (23 page)

“Besides, aren’t you two dating Johnny and
Marcus?” I asked innocently. Dana’s faced turned crimson while Beth
merely tossed her hair, flicking it into the girl’s face that was
standing behind her.

“Well,” Dana began after getting herself
under control again, “we’re off to watch some movies at my house.
We’d invite you but…” She didn’t bother to pretend there was a good
reason she wasn’t inviting me. Beth smiled at the jab. I smiled as
well. I didn’t care what they did, as long as they left me
alone.

“Well, you girls have fun,” I said. “I better
get back to my shopping.”

Dana and Beth brushed past me with their
noses in the air. The gaggle of girls trailed after them. I was
very glad at that moment that Uriah was not leaving for college. It
was going to be a very lonely last year of high school. I was about
to grab the bag of candy Lina wanted when the memory of Daniel’s
face blurred my vision. Instead of his smiling face, his mouth was
sneering at me. “What if Uriah doesn’t come back?” he seemed to be
asking.

“He is coming back,” I said.

“Um, Claire?”

I spun around to face the voice. Emily Yazzie
was still standing behind me. I hadn’t noticed that she didn’t
leave with the other girls. “Emily,” I said, hoping she had not
heard what I just said, “I thought you left with the girls.”

Emily shook her head and watched me
carefully. “I just wanted to make sure you were okay,” she said.
“I’m glad you’re feeling better. My mom was worried when Uriah left
and nobody saw you for a few days.”

Of course, I thought, Emily’s mother was
Anise Yazzie, who was also one of the Elders, the only one who had
tried to stand up for us. Emily’s parents had divorced when she was
very little, so if Anise was worried and needed to talk, it would
have been with Emily. Even if Emily knew the details of what Quaile
had said better than Dana had, she probably did not know what
really happened after we left the Elders.

Emily had always seemed nice, but I didn’t
know her very well. “I’m fine. It was just a touch of the flu, I
guess.”

“I know my mom shouldn’t have told me about
what happened in the Elder’s meeting, but she was really upset
about what Quaile told you guys,” Emily said.

I didn’t blame her mom for spilling the
details of the meeting. Something that unusual would have been hard
to keep secret. “It’s okay,” I said.

“When Quaile showed up later that night, she
seemed really upset. My mom told me to go to my room, but I
couldn’t resist listening outside the kitchen door,” Emily said.
Shame flushed her face. Her eyes were asking me to understand.

“Oh,” was all I could say at first. Emily
obviously had not mentioned whatever she’d overheard to Dana and
Beth, at least.

“I won’t tell anyone,” Emily said quickly. “I
just wanted to make sure you were alright.”

“How much did you hear?” I asked.

“I heard about who your dad went to see, and
what he did to you. I heard about Uriah leaving to find your Twin
Soul, too,” she said. Emily watched my expression. Her eyes widened
when my face betrayed the truth. “Did all of that really
happen?”

I nodded. Emily stared at me with wonder. She
actually seemed to take what she had heard at face value. “You
believe me?” I asked.

“Of course I do,” Emily said. “I’ve always
believed in Twin Souls and in what Zarafen can do. But if Uriah
really found your Twin Soul and let him wake you up … and now he’s
gone again … You’re not really getting married, are you?” Emily’s
face crumpled instead of gleaming with the possibility of Uriah
finally being single.

“Me and Uriah
are
still getting
married,” I said angrily.

“But how?” Emily asked. “If you met your Twin
Soul you can’t possibly still want to marry Uriah.”

“Oh yes I can,” I argued.

A woman about to pick up a bag of candy
snatched her hand back at my words. I shrugged a quick apology and
grabbed the candy Lina had asked for before pushing the cart down
the aisle. Emily was quick to follow. The checkout line took three
times longer than it should have, as usual, but Emily waited
patiently, and quietly.

We were out to the car before she reached her
bursting point. “Claire, I’m sorry. I know this is none of my
business, but how can you still marry Uriah? You have to be with
your Twin Soul.”

“No, I don’t,” I said. I started loading the
shopping bags into the bed of Uriah’s truck, hoping she would get
the point and leave me alone.

“But you have to,” Emily said. Suddenly her
mouth dropped. “Did something happen to him? Did your Twin Soul
die?”

“What are you talking about?” I asked. I was
quickly losing my patience with Emily. “Daniel is not hurt or dead,
or anything else besides alive and back where he belongs. Away from
me.”

“Your Twin Soul’s name is Daniel? What’s he
like?” Emily asked.

“How would I know? I met him for all of ten
minutes before he was on his way home, and I hope I never see him
again.” A stabbing pain shot through me at the unkind remark.

Emily’s eyes bulged and her mouth was hanging
down to her knees. “You don’t want to be with your Twin Soul?”
Emily asked.

The conversation was bringing up everything I
had been trying very hard not to think about. The feelings
physically assaulted me. My hands gripped the side of the truck bed
until my knuckles turned ghost white. My body and mind were
screaming at me to get in the car and search for Daniel. I knew I
would be able to find him even if he were halfway across the world.
That thought almost buckled my knees.

Squeezing my eyes shut, I dropped my head
against the hot metal of the truck. The sun had scorched the red
shell in the short time I was in the store, but pain was what I
needed to clear the unwanted thoughts from my mind. Slowly, the
searing heat gave me back the smallest hint of control. Pain was
the only thing strong enough to overpower the bond, but even that
didn’t last long enough.

I was quick to remember Uriah’s soft,
deliberate kisses. Always, he kept himself at a respectful
distance. Well, almost always. What I really wanted to remember was
the few times he had slipped and let his passion carry him away.
Graduation. Santa Fe. The climbing trip to El Rito when I fell, and
he kissed me so passionately in his relief that I wasn’t seriously
injured I could barely breathe. There were so few instances to
remember.

I tried to behave myself around Uriah and not
entice him too much, but as soon as I had my arms around Uriah
again, I was planning to kiss him within an inch of his life. I
didn’t care who might see, either. I believed Uriah would be back
soon like he said. I trusted that he would save me from this.
Neither of those were doubts for me. When Uriah came back, there
would not be anything that could take me from his side again. My
only fear, besides giving in to the bond before Uriah got back, was
that even if Uriah did break the bond, my dad would do something to
stop me again. Another reason I had to talk to him again. I had to
make sure that as soon as Uriah got back I was free to spend every
waking minute with him, and maybe some of the non-waking ones if I
could manage it.

Imagining what I wanted to do to Uriah when
he returned brought a smile to my lips and pushed away the
overpowering feelings. Tucking those thoughts safely away in a
small corner of my mind, I lifted my head, facing Emily again. Her
eyes watched me nervously, no doubt wondering if I had lost it.
Realizing how foolish I must have looked, I was quick to change the
subject.

“I need to get these groceries home,” I
said.

Emily shifted her feet, but made no move to
leave. “I came here with Dana. I think she left already.”

Searching the parking lot for Dana’s blue
Ford Escape, I realized that she was right and sighed. “Do you need
a ride home?”

Emily brightened immediately. “Thanks,
Claire.”

She was in the truck before I had the chance
to even consider changing my mind. I followed her with grim
determination to avoid any more of her questions. I wanted to get
rid of Emily as quickly as possible, but some of the items in the
truck bed needed to be refrigerated before they had a chance to
melt. Emily lived on the opposite side of the pueblo while Uriah’s
house was only a few blocks away. Reluctantly, I left the parking
lot and turned toward Uriah’s house.

Emily was not about to let the drive pass in
silence. “Claire, I’m sorry I was badgering you so much. It’s just
that I’ve grown up hearing stories from my mom and Quaile about
Twin Souls, and everything is always so wonderful after they
finally meet. It’s my dream to find my Twin Soul,” Emily said. Her
eyes were filled with unspoken illusions of happily ever after. “I
just don’t understand how you can’t want that.”

I pulled into the gravel driveway of Uriah’s
stucco and adobe brick house, relieved at the chance to escape
answering. “I’ll be right back,” I said. Jumping out of the cab, I
gathered up the bags and took them all inside in one trip.

The bags clunked against my legs as I pushed
my way through the door. I was relieved to find the living room
empty. I briefly wondered where Uriah’s mother had snuck off to.
Most likely she was out in the stables giving treats to her
favorite horse, Dewmint. The second Lina was out from under
Sophia’s watchful eye, she limped off to visit Dewmint with a
pocket full of sugar cubes.

I put the groceries away quickly and reached
for a notepad left on the kitchen table. I scribbled a quick note
to Lina about where I was going before leaving the kitchen. I
paused at the front door, not wanting to face Emily again. I knew
she wasn’t going to let up with her interrogation. I couldn’t leave
her sitting in Uriah’s truck forever, though.

My hand touched the doorknob, but I froze,
completely unable to force myself to turn it. She would ask more
questions about Daniel, questions I couldn’t bear to face right
now. My breathing grew sharp and quick as I thought of having to
get in the truck with Emily again. I slid down the wall as the pull
intensified. I lifted my head to the ceiling to try and keep fresh
tears from falling. The salty tears pooled for a few seconds, but
eventually burst over the edge and poured down my face.

My chest was aching, begging me to give in to
its desires. I wished I was back outside where I could sink my head
against the hot metal of the truck once again. Pain. I needed pain.
My trembling fingers reached up to the soft skin of my upper arm. I
grasped a chunk of flesh between my fingers and twisted as hard as
I could.

Pain lanced through my arm, but not enough to
clear my mind. I grabbed another bit of my skin, twisting even
harder. The physical agony finally chased away every other thought
and emotion. Looking down at my arm, I blanched. Huge red welts had
already formed. I pushed my sleeve down to cover the mark and
pulled myself back up, reaching for the door knob one more
time.

When I stepped into the sunlight, I was
greeted by Emily’s smiling face. I let out a deep breath and
started back to the truck. I had the feeling she had been
rehearsing her next slew of questions while I was inside. As soon
as I was sitting in the driver’s seat Emily’s mouth popped
open.

“What was it like Claire? Meeting your Twin
Soul, I mean,” Emily said. Her imagination had obviously been busy
while I was inside. She was peering through the windshield, not
seeing the pale desert landscape, but whatever fantasy her mind was
busy indulging. “I’ve heard it’s like being struck by lightning or
falling off a cliff.”

“Have you ever experienced either of those?”
I asked. Emily shook her head, but her dreamy look was not
diminished in the least. “Well, I’ve never been struck by
lightning, but I have fallen from a cliff, and actually it did feel
similar. It was terrifying.”

Emily giggled, thinking I was making a joke.
When she realized my sour expression was not part of any joke, her
lips snapped closed. I had fallen from a cliff, well off a cliff
face I was trying to climb at El Rito almost two weeks ago. The
fall had been terrifying until I heard Uriah’s voice. One syllable
out of his mouth, and I knew he would save me. I felt the same now.
I was still scared beyond belief by the fierce emotions the Twin
Soul bond created, but I knew Uriah was out there somewhere. He
would save me again.

“You’re not joking?” Emily asked.

“No, I’m really not,” I said. My voice was
cold and serious. Emily turned to stare out the window.

“It wasn’t amazing and thrilling like the
stories?” she asked.

Her expression held such total
disappointment. I felt a twinge of guilt. I was ruining her dreams
about one day meeting her Twin Soul. “Well,” I began, “I guess not
everybody has the same reaction.” I pulled up to Emily’s house
silently begging her to accept my weak answer and get out of the
truck. I might as well have wished to go back in time and refuse
the tea that had started the whole mess.

“What happened?” Emily asked. Her voice
changed from questioning to concerned. “Finding your Twin Soul is
supposed to be a miraculous event, not something that makes you
angry enough to hate the other person.”

“I didn’t want it,” I said. “I already had my
Twin Soul.”

Emily tilted her head. I could see that she
was trying very hard to understand. “But Uriah wasn’t really your
Twin Soul.”

“Have you ever been in love, Emily?”

Emily blushed fiercely. “I thought I was
once.”

“With who?” I asked. Emily’s whole face
turned scarlet. I wanted to laugh at her embarrassment, but I
settled for an understanding smile.

“Uriah?” I asked. She nodded. I laughed
hysterically. Emily stared at me like I had gone mad. Behind the
laughter, I wondered whether I had gone crazy, too. The stress and
fear had me engaged in a very tenuous balancing act. It took
several minutes for me to calm myself down.