Shifters of Grrr 2 (3 page)

I saw the flash of anger in his eyes before he ran a hand back through his thick dark hair.

"You're right." He whispered and looked up at the sky, ashamed.
 

It wasn't the response I'd been expecting and I let my clenched fists go as I mentally backed away from the argument I was about to stir up.

We both stood in silence and I realized it was easier to walk away and leave him when he was being a prick.

"I shouldn't have said that." He said eventually. "Of course I'm privileged. I have everything I could ever need or want. It's just..."

He looked at me and took a step closer, lowering his voice.

"What price would you pay for freedom...?" He left the question hanging and looked at me expectantly.

"Oh! Oh, yeah, sorry. I'm Caleb."

He smiled briefly.

"Go on then,
Caleb
. Name your price."

"For freedom?" The question caught me off guard.

He nodded.

"How important is it to you?"

"Very. It's what people fought for in the war..."

"Exactly. So why does it mean that just because my family has more than yours, that I'm not entitled to have problems? How is it fair that I have money so I'm not allowed to be unhappy?"

He was right and I felt a stab of regret for my homeless tirade previously. He wasn't as I'd assumed, in fact, there was far more depth to him.

When I looked back up, he was looking at me.

"I don't even know why I'm telling you this?" He asked, laughing slightly. "Have you heard of Lady Arabella?"

I had, but it wasn't necessary to tell him. He'd only think I was stalking him more, but yes I'd heard of her and read her articles in the paper. She was a socialite and loved to party, but looking at Henry, he was the opposite. Being American, my knowledge of the royals was limited but I knew that the country expected him to marry her. People spoke of it constantly and there was even bets running on if or when he'd announce their engagement.

"Well," he began, running a hand through his hair again, "I'm supposed to marry her. You know? The whole big affair. Cathedral, doves, the queens procession. It's meant to be the wedding the worlds been waiting for..."

"But...?"

"But I don't know if I can bring myself to propose to her."

The words hit me and I realized that it was something big. The world had been waiting for this wedding and he wasn't even sure he wanted it.

"Why? Why can't you do it?" He started to walk and I followed him across the lawn to a bench. It was the first night we'd ever properly spoken and I could just as easily turned and left him, but that wasn't me. Not anymore. If I'd been there for my brother when he'd felt at his lowest then he'd most probably still be with us, still
alive
.

We sat and listened, ears opened.

He sighed heavily, the weight of the world weighing his shoulders down.

"Do you love her?" I asked, breaking the silence. "Why don't you want to propose?"

"Because I can't bring myself to
want
her." He said the words sadly, as though he even regretted uttering them.
 

I thought about Lady Arabella, imagined her desperate to be the Prince's wife and I almost felt bad for her.
 

He looked up at me, eyebrows furrowed.
 

"I've tried so hard. I keep telling myself that It'll come with time, but..."

"Why is it so important to marry her? I mean, for centuries Royals have married, well, us
common
folk. Why can't you?"

"Because, I..." he hesitated and I could tell that he wanted to say something else but he shook his head and stood up. "I should get back."

"Okay."

I stayed sitting down, watching him walk slowly back towards the house and for a second I forgot he was meant to be the great, strong, charming Prince Henry that everyone loved so much.
 

He was almost a different person. Unrecognizable.
 

He walked a fair distance before stopping, turning and running back to me.

"Would you like to come to the party?" he asked, gesturing over his shoulder, "I forgot my manners. You know, as a thank you."

"You don't have to thank me..."

"I do. It's been a real long time since I had someone to talk to and I..."
 

He stopped, a small smile lighting up his face briefly and I felt my heart beat a little faster. Was I attracted to him only after a little conversation? Was that the same effect he had on half the UK's women?

"Anyway, if you fancy going to the party, just tell security that I invited you."

He went to walk away again but I stopped him.
 

The light from the moon above cast shadows across the grass and silence descended between us.
 

Why would a thirty-year-old man who would one day rule the country, let his parents dictate who he married?

How could such a decision render someone so powerful into a sad lesser version of himself?

I looked at him, his fist clenched gently and his chest rising and falling underneath his crisp white shirt.
 

How could someone who basically had it all be so unhappy?

"What happened last night?" I asked eventually. My voice cut through the silence and the question hung in the air.
 

He fixated his eyes on mine and stared at me. The question was a bold one and I knew before I'd even finished asking it that it was controversial.
 

What ever had happened in that room that night was serious? Something that I guessed most people didn't know.
 

He came over and sat beside me, turning slightly so that our knees touched and I felt a tingle of excitement and I looked down at where they joined and then back up at his light eyes.

"You don't have to answer..." I said but he shook his head.

"Can I tell you something?" He whispered, his voice hushed and urgent.
 
He leant closer to me and I could feel his breath against my face. His eyes darted between each of mine as though he was searching them for an answer, for reassurance.

"Go ahead." I said, my voice wavering slightly.

"I'm not who you think I am."

"You're not the Prince?" His statement surprised me. "Then who are you?"

"No, I am." He looked behind him. "If I don't marry Arabella, I won't be here. I'll break the alliance."

"The
alliance
?"

He sat up and his expression changed, his face relaxing instantly.

"I've already said too much. I should go."

He got up, heading in the direction opposite the house.

"Wait! Where are you going?"

"Away!"

"Away, where? Let me at least go and grab the security before you go."

"No! I just want to..."

"Why me?"

He stopped and looked at me, confused.

"Why what?"

"Why have you told
me
all this? Why not your parents, your friends... You don't even know me."

He walked back to me and shrugged his shoulders.

"All I know is that never in my whole life have I ever felt so...
calm
around someone. When I talk to you, I feel like... like..."

"Henry..."

"It doesn't mean anything." He said quickly. "I'm heading out tonight, I need some time away from here. I'll probably go back to Devon."

"Tonight?"

"I have to."

I stood looking at him and for some reason I had the overwhelming urge to reach out and hold him. Was it the fact that even though he was older, he looked so vulnerable in front of me or that I was pleasantly surprised by how raw and real he was.

Just as I took a step forwards, we heard shouting behind us.

"Quick!" Henry said, reaching forwards and pulling my arm. "Security! Lets go, hurry."

I followed him to the side of the grounds and then he hurried through the bushes and crouched on the other side.

"What about your suit?" I asked looking down at the expensive black material covered with leaves and his shoes slightly muddy.

He pressed a finger to his lips.

"Shhh."

"What's going on?" I whispered

"I suspect my parents have sent them. Listen, I don't know what I was thinking telling you all this, but it was nice to have someone unbiased to talk to for a change."

"Don't mention it."

"Seriously," he began, lowering his voice again, "I'd appreciate it if our little conversation tonight remains, um..."

"Fine. Cool. I won't repeat a word." I interrupted and he smiled. The first real one I'd seen from him all evening.

We waited in silence for the voices to subside and Henry peered ridiculously through the branches.

"Is it clear?" I asked.
 

He nodded and I made a move to climb out, but he held my arm tightly so I couldn't get away.

"What the...?"

"Thanks again for
listening
." He said, looking directly into my eyes.

I held my hand out to shake his.

"Like I said, it's..."

His lips pressed against mine and stopped me mid speech. His lips were soft and warm and all I could hear around me was the wind through the trees and the soft beat from the music back at the house.

Was Prince Henry kissing me? Was he
gay
?

He opened his lips against mine and I jumped backwards, stumbling onto the muddy floor in surprise.

Henry looked down at me confused before offering me his hand.

I got up without him.

"Caleb, sorry I thought you were..."

I was out from the other side of the bush before he could finish and I started walking briskly back to the house until I heard him emerge too.

"Caleb, wait!"

My walk broke into a run and I sped up the lawn, ignoring the fact that my heart was pounding millions of miles an hour.
 

I didn't know if he was behind me or not, but it didn't matter, I had to get back to the accommodation and disappear.
 

Behind the safe haven of my room, I closed the door and paced up and down.
Prince
Henry had tried to kiss me.
 

One minute we were talking and opening up and then the next minute, we were opposite each other kissing, but that wasn't the problem. It wasn't a secret to myself that for a long time I'd felt myself more attracted to men. It had taken years for me to realize why women weren't exciting me anymore, but they were just thoughts. I'd never been with a man and Henry's kiss had taken me by surprise.
 

It was the first time I'd ever connected with another man in such a way and as our lips met, it solidified everything that I'd been battling with in my head.

I finally knew the answers to my questions. I was gay and I wanted more of the Prince.

Prince Henry

Why did I do it?
 

The palace was still alive with voices and laughter when I walked back through the doors trying to catch my breath.

I looked up and down the hall, eyes scanning all the faces just in case I'd missed him.

Margie came up by my side and rested a hand on my arm.

"Henry? Everything okay? You've been missing for ages, your parents are worried."

I looked down at her concerned face.

"Have you seen Caleb?" I asked.

"
Caleb
? You mean the new gardener?"

"He came through here a moment ago and I..."

"Should I call security?" She made a move to go towards the door but I shook my head.

"It's fine I just..." I couldn't tell her that I'd accidently kissed him. In fact, I couldn't tell anyone. If the Winchesters found out about what had happened, the alliance would be broken and the family secret... I didn't want to think about it. I made my excuses to her and left.
 

I hated lying, but there was no way I could deny the feelings that I felt when our lips touched. It was like I'd only just started living.
 

After all the years of wondering and worrying about what was missing from my life, I realized it and for the first time in my whole life I seriously considered telling my parents that I wouldn't be marrying a Winchester.
 

I had to start living. I couldn't keep lying to them or myself.

I left the Great Hall and ran to the back of the house, hoping to find Caleb in the staff accommodation. I had to see him and apologize before he spread the word around the palace.
 

Part of me liked to believe that he wouldn't do that to me, but I'd seen other family members stung before and I couldn't let that happen to me.