Shifting Gears: The Complete Series (Sports Bad Boy Romance) (81 page)

I could feel myself nearing the edge. I
clutched him tighter and moved my own hips faster as I told him, “Oh god, Paul.
I’m coming baby! Oh fuck!” I groaned out loudly as my pussy muscles clenched
down on his hard cock and the orgasm claimed me.
 
I shook against him, clenching and
unclenching and feeling my juice spill out over him. His cock became more
slippery with each thrust until at last I felt him beginning to grow and swell
and he began to plunge in even harder and deeper until he let out one long
growl that sounded like it came from some kind of primal center deep inside of
him.

I was still coming in aftershocks and he
kept moving, as his cock emptied out, twisting and pulsating inside of me
sending live shocks of electricity shooting through my veins.

”Fuck, Jessie!” He leaned his body into
mine, pressing me further against the cage. He was still slowly moving his hips,
gently moving his cock in and out of me as we both took our time coming down
from our high.
 
“You’re amazing.” he
breathed out just before his cock slipped out of me.

“Mmm, you are,” I said. I giggled then.

“What’s so funny?” he asked. He had his
forehead pressed to mine and I could feel the warmth of his breath. I loved it.

“I was just thinking, “I fucked a
champion.”

He laughed, “You fucked him good too baby.
Mmm! So good.” He slid his tongue out and ran it across my lips and said,
“Guess what?”

“What?” I asked, finally feeling like my
breath was finally under control.

“I found the cure for my pain…sex with
you…the cure-all.”

“I’m so glad I could help,” I said.

He pulled his head back and looked at me
seriously then as he said, “You know I won a lot of money the other night?”

“Yeah,” I said. I knew a lot of money was
involved, but I had no idea how much “a lot” was in this case.

“I want to take you somewhere. I want us
to go on a vacation together. You get to pick where…anywhere you want to go.”

“Well, not anywhere…”

He cupped my chin in his hand and tilted
my face up towards his as he said, “Yes baby, anywhere. I brought so much drama
into your life and instead of running the other way you faced it like a champ
and helped me through it. I want to pay you back for all of that…so anywhere
baby.”

Still joking…kind of, I said, “I have
always wanted to go to Barcelona.”

“Then Barcelona it is,” he said. He kissed
me again and the truth of the matter is I didn’t care if we ever went any
further than right where we were at.

CHAPTER
SIX

SIX
WEEKS LATER

I stood looking out across the lively city
of Barcelona. Even after the sun went down, there was still plenty for people
to do. The weather was gorgeous and the atmosphere romantic and couples
strolled hand and hand along the sidewalks that wound between the beautifully
designed and built ancient buildings. I couldn’t remember ever being so content
with my life and so at peace in my heart. I leaned against the wrought iron
barrier at the top of the beautiful city and let my mind wander back to how I
ended up here.

For several weeks after Paul won his title
he was a really busy man. He was invited to do interviews and photo shoots and
endorsements for pro sports shops and brand name boxing and cage-fighting equipment.
I stayed busy too, I was getting more and more clients of my own at the gym and
I also picked my mother up from the rehab and helped her get set up in her new
apartment. She was doing so well and I was so proud of her. She thanked me
profusely for helping her out and promised me she was going to pay me back for
everything and for the first time in my life, I believed that she really meant
it. I got her a little place about a block from my own apartment. It was in a
good neighborhood and there was a park nearby where she could take a walk every
day and feed the ducks if she wanted to. She had already begun applying for
jobs with the help of the staff at the rehab and she had a few interviews set
up.

Marie and I had gotten close and we tried
to get together for lunch a couple of times a week. She and Justin were getting
pretty hot and heavy and Paul was doing okay with it. Maybe it was because he’d
been too busy to worry, but I think he was really starting to like Justin. I
was convinced that Marie had finally found a man who would treat her and her
son the way they deserved to be treated. Marie found a job in a lawyer’s
office, working as a receptionist and Victor was enrolled in a new school and
making new friends. He was adjusting to his mom having a boyfriend and he
seemed to really like Justin.

I came home from work one day in early
September and found a huge bouquet of red and pink roses on the doorstep. The
card attached to them said, “Para mi corazón,” I wasn’t fluent in Spanish, but
I knew enough to know that meant “For my Heart.” I let myself into the
apartment with a smile on my face. Once I closed the door behind me I went to
sit the vase of beautiful roses on the table in the foyer. I found an envelope
lying there with my name on it and something else written in Spanish. It said,
“Puesta de sol en Barcelona?” That one I had to look up. It meant “Sunset in
Barcelona?” I suddenly couldn’t stop smiling. I slid open the envelope and
inside were two airline tickets and boarding passes for a flight to Barcelona
leaving the following week. There was another note inside. This one was in
English and it said, “You better get your passport in order.” When Paul got
home that day he got very lucky. Then that night, he got lucky again and in the
morning luckier still.

So now I’m sitting here on the balcony of
the five star Hotel Claris in downtown Barcelona and I’m pinching myself to
make sure it’s all real.

“What are you doing?” I looked up to see
Paul standing in between the French doors of our suite and the balcony that
attached to it. He was wearing one of the fluffy, white robes they left for the
guests and I was wearing the other. We’d made it in time to watch the Sunset.
After watching it we were both feeling so romantic that we had to try out the
giant, fluffy bed. Paul took his shower first afterwards while I sat out on the
balcony and had a glass of wine.

“I was pinching myself,” I told him.

He laughed and came over and put his
strong hands on my shoulders. “Are you making sure you’re awake and not
dreaming?”

“Exactly,” I told him. “Sometimes it’s all
so surreal.”

He leaned down and kissed the side of my
face. “I can understand that. But this is real. Get used to it. One of my goals
is to make sure you have to pinch yourself on a daily basis to ensure that it’s
all real. I don’t ever want to stop surprising you.”

I reached up and put the palm of my hand
on the side of his face. “I love you, Paul. You know that I don’t need all of
this. I was in love with you when you lived in an abandoned gym.”

“I know,” he said. “I love you too.” He
sat down next to me. I wanted it to be like this forever. I wanted to believe
that someday we would get married and have children and grow old together. I
know it was still soon to talk about it, so I hadn’t brought it up. It was
maybe too soon to think about it, but that, I couldn’t help. The only problem
was that there were still two questions that poke at my brain sometimes…two
things I needed to ask Paul to explain.

“Can I ask you a question, babe? Two
questions, actually?”

“Sure, anything,” he said.

“Well, I’ve been wondering since that
night we went to look for my mom at the church…how was it that the pastor knew
you by name?”

He hesitated and for a second I felt a
flutter of doubt. I chastised myself for it. Paul had given me no reason to do
anything but trust him. He finally said, “I dated a girl who had a problem with
drugs. I took her there for her meetings sometimes and for a while I
volunteered at the church…when I had the time.”

“I thought that you said you never really
had a serious relationship.” I didn’t want to sound like I was accusing him of
things, but I really needed to understand. Surely a man wouldn’t take a woman
he barely knew for drug treatment.

“That’s the truth. I have never had an
actual relationship until now. I only went out with her once, but I was stupid
and let things get complicated.”

“Yet you decided to help her with her drug
problem…after only one date?” I guess that’s the part that didn’t really make
sense.

He sighed. “I went out with her one night.
We saw a movie and had dinner. When I took her home she invited me in. I should
have said no, but I didn’t so I have no excuses. We had sex and I also agreed
to do it knowing I didn’t have any more condoms. She got pregnant. I hadn’t seen
her in a couple of months when she called and told me.
 
I knew that I had to step up and be a father,
but I had no desire to be a husband…or even a live in boyfriend to this girl. I
gave her money and I told her I would come and see her often…I didn’t know yet
about her drug problem, but I figured it out pretty fast. I went over one time
when she was about five months along and I found her and some guy sitting on
the front porch of her apartment, smoking meth. I freaked out and I physically
removed the guy from her front porch and I tried to make her go to the hospital
and have the baby checked out. She said that if she did that and she tested
positive for meth…social services would come and take the baby as soon as he
was born.”

“He?” I asked.

He looked sad and he had to swallow hard
as he said, “Yeah, it was a boy. I was getting used to the idea of having a
baby. Marie and I had decorated the extra room in my apartment for him and I
was already trying to think of names…I couldn’t stand the thought of someone
taking him and putting him in a foster home….I didn’t make her go to the
hospital that day. Maybe if I had things would have turned out differently.
Then again, maybe not. Either way I will always regret that for the rest of my
life.”

“She didn’t stop using?”

“I thought she had. She told me she had.
Since I didn’t live with her, it was hard for me to know the truth. I should
have looked closer…I should have let her come and live with me…that was what
she wanted. I should have put the safety and well-being of my child above all
else.” He paused there and looked as if he was hoping I’d let it go. We were in
too deep now. I had to know who I was sleeping with.

“What happened?” I finally asked.

“I forced her to go into treatment,” he
said.

“You forced her?”

“I threatened to stop paying her bills and
I told her that I would take the baby from her when he was born and not let her
see him. I was a dick about it and just thinking about it makes me hate myself
all over again, so yeah I would call it forced…or maybe even bullied.”

“It’s a common mistake,” I told him. “We
think we can “fix them” but the problem is they have to be willing to do the
work. When you love someone that’s hurting themselves…It’s almost impossible to
just sit back and watch it happen.”

“I didn’t love her, Jessie. I’ve never
been in love before, until you. I loved my baby and this woman, his mother was
a means to that end.”

I took his hand and I cringed at the tears
that welled in his eyes as I said, “What happened to him, Paul?” I knew this
would be the harder part for him to talk about.

His voice was shaky and I almost wished I
hadn’t asked as he went on, “She went to the meetings for a while. I found out
later that she never stopped using. She stopped the meth because it was easy
for me to tell when she was using that. She started taking pills…OxyContin.”

“Like my mom.”

“Yeah. I’m sorry. That’s why I called your
mother a druggie that night. It gave me flashbacks and freaked me out….She was
taking lots of pills. She wasn’t paying her bills or buying food with the money
I gave her. She was buying drugs. One day she didn’t show up for her meeting
and I went to her apartment to get her. She didn’t answer the door and I was
mad. I busted it down and I found her in a pool of her own vomit. She
overdosed. By the time the ambulance got there, she was dead. They tried to
save the baby, but he was gone too.”

I had tears streaming down my own face
now. I couldn’t believe he’d gone through all of that. My heart was breaking
for him. “I’m so sorry,” I told him. “I know that you have to take
responsibility for being a part of the pregnancy…But, otherwise it sounds to me
like you did the best that you could. I am sorry you had to go through that.”

“Me too,” he said, “The thing was, I
wasn’t a child. I knew what the consequences of unprotected sex can be.
 

******

Our first morning in Barcelona we watched
the sunrise while we had breakfast on the terrace. It started out subtly and
little by little it covered the haze that hung over the city with a pure white
light. I don’t know about Paul, but as I watched it, I felt the weight of the
past few months dissolving and as they did, I felt as light as the breeze
blowing across the beautiful old city. After breakfast we took a walk down to
the docks and saw some of the city. We window shopped along the stores on the
beachfront and I made a mental note of the ones I wanted to come back and
explore later. There were entertainers out in the streets, playing guitars or
dancing or juggling. It seemed like the entire city had waked up with the sun
and they had all come out to play. We found our way to the pier and got on a
ferry that took us out to a small island for our first snorkeling lesson. I had
marveled at the brilliant clear blue of the Mediterranean Sea while we stood at
the edge of the ferry and looked out on it, but that was nothing compared to
standing on the beach. The sun was vibrant and the beams shone down onto the
sand and made it sparkle like millions of tiny jewels had been scattered across
it. At the edge of the shore where the sea met the sand, the waves rolled in
gently and their white foam tips would break up as it lapped at the edges. I
was speechless at first and then I started snapping pictures like the crazy
tourist that I was.