Shooter (Burnout) (37 page)

****************

Hayley didn’t know exactly what to think but she knew one thing for certain, she didn’t want to make an embarrassing scene in Maria’s in front of the rowdy Friday night crowd. Perhaps, she wondered, that Chris hadn’t wanted a scene, either, and so he was waiting to talk to her about Deanna when they got home. She accepted this and tried to put it out of her mind for the rest of her shift.

The bike ride home was nice. She was reminded of how much she missed having Chris nearby as she wrapped her arms firmly around him. This week had been horrible. She’d felt like such a freak for getting upset when he’d tried to initiate sex. And then when he left it just made her feel worse. She knew he felt bad, but she felt totally responsible for the whole mess.

Getting off the bike, she followed him to the front door. She really didn’t want to talk about Deanna. She’d much rather just get into bed with Chris. But she knew they might as well get it over with, though. She set the helmet down by the door.

“So,” she announced. “We should probably talk.”

Chris grimaced. “Hayley, I am so, so sorry about what happened. You have no idea. I-”

Hayley shook her head. “It’s not your fault. It’s mine.”

“Don’t ever say that! Nothing was your fault. At all. I’m the one who screwed up. I don’t even really know how it happened. I don’t share my bed with many women.”

Hayley frowned, reminded of Deanna. “And then there was today.”

“Today I realized I can’t be away from you anymore. We’re going to work this out. We’re going to fix this,” he assured her. “But not right now. I just want you. In my bed. Next to me. We can deal with all this tomorrow.”

At first Hayley had thought he had been trying to avoid a scene at the bar, but now, when they were alone, he still wasn’t bringing up Deanna. Maybe Deanna had lied altogether and hadn’t even been at Burnout this afternoon. But why was he pushing her put off discussing anything?

“I’ve missed you all week. “Today was the worst,” she replied. “It just seemed to drag on and I knew you’d be at the bar tonight. Tonight couldn’t get here fast enough.”

Chris took her in his arms and brushed her hair back. “For me, too, baby. I just need to hold you again.” He ushered them into the bedroom. Hayley a little bewildered for a moment as he swept her inside and shut the door.

“We don’t have to do anything,” he assured her, stripping off his jeans. “I just need to hold you.”

Hayley hesitated. They didn’t need to do anything? Why was that? Because he’d gotten it from somewhere (someone) else?

Chris threw his shirt onto the chair and kissed her again. Now Hayley started to grow angry. “Did you think about me today?” she asked as his lips brushed over her neck.

He groaned and ran his hands down her back. “Always,” he told her.

“Really?”

“Mmm,” was his only response.

“Did you think of me while you were fucking her? Did you call her my name again?”

Chris froze and pulled back from her. “Goddamn it,” he muttered. “She got to you. I should have known she wouldn’t just let it go. Hayley, listen to me-”

“I tried listening to you!” she snapped. “I asked you over and over what happened today and you lied to me!”

Chris kept his voice calm to counteract her shrill one. “I didn’t lie to you. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you upset. Nothing happened, she-”

Hayley scoffed. “Oh, really?! Nothing happened? While she was bent over your desk? Just like me? Have you been doing her this whole time? I bet she gives it to you just how you like it. And the two of you, you talk about me, and how fucked up I am. Of course you wanted your name tattooed on her perfect body. Did you tell her how ugly I am? Did the two of you get a good laugh out of it?” Her hand struck out to slap him but he caught it easily.

“
You do not hit me
,” he growled. “Especially since I would never, ever do it to you. I get that this is your first real relationship, so I’m going to forgive you this time. But I’ve seen enough of that shit in my life and I
will not
come home to it.” He dropped her hand.

“If something happens and you’re upset, if you’re hurting, you talk to me. That’s the only way this works. I screwed up. Twice. Once by scaring you and then by not talking to you. I see that now. I was so worried about putting enough space between us so you’d be comfortable, and I should’ve been talking to you about it.

“And do not put words in my mouth. I’ve told you about that before. You are not ugly. I’ve never said you were and I won’t tolerate anyone else saying it, either, not even you. You do not speak for me. You do not hit me. And you
do not
play games with me, especially not
in our fucking bed
.” He jabbed a finger through the air. “That bed is for you to come to me so I can love you. You do not drag your bullshit into it.”

Hayley’s mouth dropped open. “My bullshit?!”

“Yes, your bullshit! You know goddamn good and well I’ve never cheated on you, would
never
cheat on you! If you don’t know that, then you have no business coming to me in that bed. None at all. You can be mad at me for not telling you she showed up at the garage, but I’m not going to stand here and be accused of something you should know I would never do.”

Hayley’s eyes narrowed at him. “Well, why didn’t you tell me?” she shouted. “Why did you keep it from me? Why are you keeping anything from me at all? How come
that’s
not one of your rules?”

He leaned down and got into her face. To her credit, she didn’t move away. “Gee, I don’t know,
Hayley,
” he snarled. At that, she did flinch back, as quickly as if he’d actually hit her and Chris walked out of the room.

Hayley sat on the bed, fighting back tears. The front door hadn’t opened. The bike hadn’t been started. Or the truck. Chris was still in the house, it seemed. Unfortunately, despite his proximity, it also seemed like they couldn’t be further apart.

**************************

Chris slept on the couch. Which wasn’t nearly as comfortable without Hayley on top of him. In the morning he couldn’t tell whether she was actually asleep in bed or just faking because she didn’t want to talk to him. He showered and dressed quickly and headed to the garage. It was Saturday but neither one of them seemed to be in a mood to be around each other. The mood continued all weekend.

He knew he’d fucked up, many times. He just wasn’t sure what to do to fix it. He’d made it as far as the couch, but couldn’t seem to make it as far as the bedroom. Frankly, he couldn’t remember who exactly was more mad at whom. And it was wearing on him. On Monday, Slick was still doing what he now was certain was a decent imitation of a opossum. He left her pretending to sleep and headed to work.

His temper was evident from the moment he walked in the door. Everyone but Tex pretended not to notice. Tex, though, leaned against the counter. “Told her about Deanna,” he surmised. But at seeing Chris’s expression he changed his mind. “Ah. You
didn’t
tell her about Deanna. And she found out anyway.” He sighed. “Got an ETA on the makeup sex?”

Chris snorted. “Not any time soon. We had a blowout about it. I slept on the couch.”

“Damn,” Jimmy said, glancing at the sofa. “Must’ve been some fight. You’re the one who fucked up, bro, what did you have to fight about?”

Chris leveled his gaze at his youngest teammate. “She tried to slap me.”

Easy laughed, but Tex and Hawk frowned. “Downright uncivilized,” Tex muttered.

Easy laughed even harder. “Man, seriously?” he asked Tex. “You spank the bejesus out of them!”

Tex shot him a look. “Whoa there, grasshopper. First off, I don’t hit a woman
anywhere
when I’m pissed off. That’s a recipe for disaster. And no matter who’s done what to whom, there’s no call for anyone to be hitting anyone else in the
face
. That’s just abuse, no matter who’s doing the swinging.” He turned to look at Chris. “Hope you set her straight on
that
score.”

Chris nodded. “I did. Won’t put up with that kind of shit under my own god damn roof, that’s for sure.”

Tex sighed. “Well, she’s young. She’s got time to learn.”

*************************

Hayley got off work early that afternoon and decided, for both of them, that enough was enough. It didn’t even matter who’d screwed up or who was angry. She missed him and she knew he missed her. And she’d be goddamned if the thing that broke them up would be Deanna. She bought some peaches, some steaks, and some potatoes and hurried home. It was time to get back together.

Chris came home on time. Which was a relief and told her he at least wasn’t trying to avoid her. She’d changed her flour-mussed clothes for a knee length sundress and brushed out her hair. Chris was pretty observant, as a general rule and he definitely didn’t miss the table being set, or the candles in the middle, or Hayley’s attempt at looking presentable.

He nodded, almost to himself, and headed off to the bedroom without saying anything to her. She couldn’t be certain, but Hayley had a good idea that they were going to patch things up tonight. As Chris showered, she took the pie out of the oven and set it on a rack to cool. She struggled with opening a bottle of wine she’d gotten at the store but kicked herself when she realized that Chris didn’t actually own any wine glasses. She settled for two tumblers and poured.

A small smile graced the corners of his mouth when he returned, clean and clean shaven and smelling in exactly that way that she’d been missing these last few days.

“Sorry I don’t have any wine glasses.”

“It’s okay,” she replied. “I should have checked. But I went to the store straight from work and I didn’t have time to go back out.”

“We’ll go to mall this weekend and get some.”

A giggle escaped her lips. Hayley couldn’t help it.

“What?”

“Nothing. I’m just....picturing you at the mall.”

“I’ve been to the mall.”

She raised an eyebrow at him.

“I’ve been over there,” he insisted. “I’ve been- Look, I know where it
is
!”

She laughed and he joined in. After a few moments she caught his gaze. “So can we start over?”

“No,” he said firmly. Her smiled faded. He took her hand from across the table and she felt a glimmer of hope, anyway. “I don’t start over. I want to pick up right where we left off. With you in my house, in my bed, and hot by noon.
For the rest of the day.”

Hayley shivered in anticipation. Chris didn’t miss it. She tried to gather the plates quickly but he pulled her to him. “Leave them,” he ordered. He lowered himself, caught her behind the knees with one arm and had her firmly by the shoulders with the other. He carried her into the bedroom. Their bedroom, she thought, with no small amount of wonder.

He laid her on the bed and pressed one knee into the mattress next to her. His mouth was on hers, his hands were on her shoulders. They slid to her back and tugged at the zipper. He pulled the dress off over her head and she fought to quell the tiny bubble of panic that threatened to rise up. He carefully pushed her back down onto the mattress and moved to cover her. As she’d once done for him, his lips brushed her collarbone, traveled between her exposed breasts.

There was only one long, white scar across her left breast. Chris’ lips followed the length of it. The scar between them trailed down to her stomach and he followed it down to the criss-cross of lines on her stomach.

“I love you,” he told her.

She jerked with a sob that she tried to force back down. Her stomach quivered as he kissed it. “I hate what he did, but I love every part of you.”