Sizzling (15 page)

She sat up and unfastened the rest of her
braid, then flopped back down on the bed. He reached out and fingered
a wavy curl.
She turned toward him. "At the risk of being
greedy, I'm ready for more."
So was he. He'd been hard
and ready since she'd showed up. It had been a hell of a long
time.
He opened a drawer in the nightstand and grabbed a
condom and quickly put it on. Then he pulled Lori close and began to
kiss her.
Her body felt good against his. She was soft and
yielding in all the right places. He liked how she smelled and tasted
and responded. He liked pretty much everything.
She reached
between them and touched him.
"Oh."
Oh? He
was about to ask what was wrong when he realized he wasn't hard.
Until maybe three seconds ago, he'd been a rock. Now…nothing.
"Give
me a second," he said and reached for her breast.
He was
fine, he told himself. Everything worked. Everything
always
worked. He was a fucking machine.
He tried to find humor in
the play on words, but couldn't. Then he focused on how great her
breast felt in his hand. Then he did his best to remember a porn
movie he'd seen. Any porn movie. Crowds and crowds of people doing
it. A whole stadium humping.
It didn't work. He wanted her. He
wanted her bad. He wanted to be in her and coming and feeling great.
But his body refused to respond. If anything his dick shrank down to
the size of a grape.
He rolled onto his back and swore.
Humiliation made him rest his forearm over his eyes and wish to hell
he was anywhere but here.
"Reid?" Lori's voice was
soft and tentative.
He raised his other hand. "Don't,"
he told her. "Whatever you're going to say, just don't. I want
to totally be in the moment, so later, when I'm asked, I can point to
this as the official low point of my life. I know it's the newspaper
article. I know it's pressure. But knowing doesn't help."
"There's
a bright side."
He lowered his arm and looked at her. She
was bent over him, her long hair teasing his arm.
"There's
no damn bright side," he said, trying not to sound angry at her.
"This doesn't happen to me. I know guys say that, but for me,
it's true. It sure isn't you. I enjoyed what we were doing. It was
all I could do to let you come first and not just take you in the
first five seconds. I'm better than this."
She smiled.
"Better doesn't come close. Right this minute, you're the best
sex I ever had. Seriously. So what does that say about my life? Talk
about putting things in perspective."
Against his will,
he started to smile. She grinned, then began to chuckle.
"I'm
pathetic," she said, still laughing.
"No. Never.
You're beautiful."
And she was. Naked and flushed and
smiling at him. Without thinking, he kissed her. She parted and then
he was in her mouth.
God, she felt good. He touched her body,
stroking her everywhere. He reached between her legs and she parted
for him. She was so wet and hot. He wanted to be there.
Without
thinking, he shifted so that he could push inside of her. He had a
moment of panic, knowing he couldn't possibly, but then he was
filling her. He was hard, he thought with relief. Then being hard
didn't matter. Not when he could thrust into her and take them both
the long way home.

CHAPTER
TWELVE

LORI DID HER BEST to slow her breathing. It was kind of
embarrassing to still be panting ten minutes after the fact. But
considering all her body had been through in the past half hour,
maybe it was to be expected.
She still felt boneless and
incapable of actual movement. Every part of her groaned with
satisfaction.
Reid shifted so that she lay next to him. He
wrapped an arm around her and ran his hand down her side.
"Amazing,"
she breathed. "Seriously, that cult thing? I'm totally
there."
Instead of answering, he kissed her. There was
tenderness in the gesture and without warning, she felt tears in her
eyes.
Tears? After sex?
That got her attention. She sat
up and glanced at the clock on the nightstand. It was nearly five—
a full hour after her shift ended.
"I should be going,"
she said, mostly because of the unexpected emotion, but also because
she rarely arrived home much later than this. "Madeline will
wonder what happened to me."
"Let her get her own
guy," Reid said, pulling her back into his arms. "Call and
let her know you're not going to be home for dinner, then stay with
me."
Several thoughts filled her brain at once. In no
particular order they were the fact that Reid seemed to
want
her to stay. Didn't guys want to do the deed, then cut and run? She
would have bet a lot of money on the fact that he was one of them. A
guy who was only in it for the sex shouldn't want company after. So
was he just an anomaly or was this a different situation?
She
knew which she wanted it to be but it wasn't like she was going to be
asking the question.
Second was the "let her get her own
guy" comment. As in he was her, Lori's, guy? On what
planet?
Finally the fact that she wanted to stay but was
afraid. Afraid of caring, afraid of feeling, afraid of him crushing
her like a delicate girl bug overwhelmed by feelings.
A
strong, self-actualized woman would face her fears. A smart woman
interested in survival would disappear into the night.
He
handed her his cell phone and then he smiled.
The smile got
her. They were naked, in his bed and she'd just had the most
incredible sexual experience of this or any other life. Why would she
want to walk away from that?
"Hi, it's me," Lori
said when her sister picked up.
"How interesting,"
Madeline said, a smile in her voice. "According to the caller
ID, I should be talking to Reid Buchanan."
"I'm, ah,
using his cell phone."
"Are you going to tell me
why?"
Lori knew she would confess everything later, but
right now she didn't want to get into the details. "I wanted to
let you know that I'll be a little late tonight."
Reid
pushed her onto her back and began licking her breasts. Despite the
liquid fire pouring through her, Lori did her best to keep her
breathing totally normal.
Madeline laughed. "Who would
have thought my totally straightlaced sister would fall for a bad boy
baseball player? Have a good time."
Reid grabbed the
phone, said, "Don't wait up," into it, then disconnected
the call and slipped his hands between her legs. "Where were
we?"
Thirty minutes and two orgasms later, Lori
resurfaced. She lay on her side, facing Reid and lightly traced his
features.
"You're very good-looking," she said.
He
frowned. "Don't say that."
"Because it's a bad
thing?"
"Because it's one of the things you don't
like about me."
"That's not true. I like that you're
pretty."
He winced. "No guy wants to be called
pretty. I'm not pretty."
"You're close."
He
grabbed her hand and pressed a kiss to her palm. "You think I'm
shallow and that I've skated by on my talent and good looks."
"A
little. Do you want to tell me that you've done any differently?"
"I
want to, but I'd be lying." He ran his fingers through her hair.
"Now this is pretty."
"Gloria wants me to cut
it."
"What do you want?"
"I don't
know. I've always hated my hair. When I was younger, it was a hideous
color of red. I was teased all through school. It's gotten better in
the past few years, but with the waves and everything, I don't know
what to do with it. So I ignore it."
"Ignoring
something doesn't make it go away," he told her.
"If
you're going to get all deep and sensitive, a lot of women are going
to be disappointed."
"What about you?"
This
was the second time he implied that she mattered in some way. Lori
hated how much she wanted that to be true.
"I'm open to
change."
"Except when it comes to your hair."
He
had her there. "Maybe I should get it cut."
"You
should do what makes you happy."
Being with him made her
happy, she thought as she pressed her hand against his bare chest.
She liked the feel of warm skin and the way the hair there tickled.
She still couldn't believe that she was here, naked, able to touch
him however she wanted.
He stroked her cheek, then rubbed his
thumb over her lower lip. "Why nursing?"
"I
wanted to help people and I wanted to be needed." She drew back
slightly, startled by her own honesty.
"Good reasons,"
he said.
"Partially altruistic, partially selfish,"
she admitted. "I also wanted a career that I could count on. I
knew that I would have to take care of myself financially and nursing
has made that happen."
He smiled. "No plans to marry
a rich guy?"
"No plans to marry anyone."
"Why
not?"
She had a fairly clear understanding of why not.
The bottom line was she didn't trust any man enough to believe he
could love her.
"I'm not the marrying kind. I'm okay with
that."
"You don't believe that humans have a
biological need to pair bond?" he asked.
She blinked at
him. "What did you say?"
His smile turned smug. "I
went to college."
"Where you majored in cheerleaders
and being charming."
"I got a degree in cultural
anthropology."
The surprises kept on coming. "Why?"
"I
thought it sounded cool and would get me women."
She
laughed. "At least you're honest."
"I try to
be."
"Okay. Back to your original and slightly
startling question. Yes, I suppose most people need to pair bond. But
the need is stronger in some than in others. It's not a big deal for
me. I just want to be able to take care of myself. Buying my house
put me on that road."
"Your whole face changes when
you talk about your house."
"Does it? I guess
because I really love the place. I love that I can decorate it
however I want. I love the size and the location. I love that I have
an emergency fund in case I need a new water heater or there's a
plumbing problem. I love that every month I add a little extra onto
the mortgage payment so I can pay the place off in fifteen years
instead of thirty. I feel safe there."
His dark gaze
never left her face. "Feeling safe is important to you."
He
wasn't asking a question, which was fine. He was plenty smart enough
to figure out her issues.
"I grew up in a double-wide in
Tacoma. It was no one's idea of a great life," she
said.
"Madeline mentioned your mom was difficult."
"Oh,
really?" She flopped onto her back. "What else did my
sister tell you?"
"That you were the one your mother
took things out on."
That was true, Lori thought sadly.
"My mother used to drink. A lot. She was a pretty mean
drunk."
"And now?" he asked.
"She's
been sober seven years."
"So that's good,
right?"
"I guess. She's trying to put the pieces
back together."
Reid leaned over and lightly kissed her.
"Are you going to let her be successful?"
She looked
up at him. "Don't get too insightful. It will change my opinion
of you."
"I can handle it. Are you going to answer
the question?"
"I don't know," she admitted
slowly. "Sometimes I really want her to make this work. I want
her to be successful."
"But?"
"But
I'm still mad as hell at her." She wrinkled her nose. "I
know that's awful. She's my mother. She's putting her life back
together and I'm still pissed because of how she treated me when I
was twelve. I should get over it and move on."
"That's
your head talking. Not your heart."
She narrowed her
gaze. "Excuse me, but a degree in cultural anthropology doesn't
mean you get to play pretend psychologist with me."
He
grinned. "What if we play it naked?"
"We are
naked and the answer is no."
He kissed her again. "You're
not easy."
"Thank you. It's been my life's ambition
to not be easy."
"So really. Why aren't you
married?"
He had a streak of tenacity she hadn't
expected. There was no way she was going to admit the real reason, so
she settled for truthful but slightly off the mark.
"No
one ever asked," she told him, not bothering to mention she
didn't let anyone get close enough to think about asking.
Nothing
about Reid's expression changed. "Any near misses?"
"Not
one."
"So did you not meet the right guy or were you
scared?"
Okay, now they were getting a little too
personal. "Hey, what about you?" she asked. "All these
questions apply."
"I don't date many guys. Sure, I
tried for a while but it was just a fad."
She laughed.
"You know what I mean."
"I fell in love once,
remember? I was willing to do the marriage thing."
With a
woman who didn't want him, Lori thought sadly. Life was nothing if
not perverse.

* * *

DANI WALKED INTO the Daily Grind and glanced around for Gary.
Sometime in the past couple of weeks they'd established a standing
coffee date. She waved when she saw him already seated at a table in
the corner. What did it say about her life that the best guy she'd
met in years turned out to be gay?
"How's the job search
going?" he asked as she took the seat opposite his.
"Okay.
I've had a couple more interviews, but nothing I've really clicked
with. The problem is I love working with Penny at The Waterfront.
Sure it's hard work, but we're all part of a team." She
grimaced. "Could I sound more like a cliché?"
"Probably
not, but is that bad? Would you rather work in a place where you're
not part of a team?"
"No and no. That's why I turned
down the last job offer. I know you said to be patient and you're
right. It's just…" She took a breath. "I hate to
admit this, but with Walker running the company, I kind of don't want
to move on. Dealing with him makes me feel connected to my
family."
"They'll still be your family, no matter
where you work," Gary told her. "Are you still thinking
about looking outside of Seattle?"
"I should, but I
haven't yet. I don't want to move away."
"Then you
don't have to. There's no law."
He smiled at her— a
sweet, gentle smile that made her happy they'd become friends. He was
a good man and knowing there could never be anything sexual between
them helped a lot. She didn't need to make another mistake in the man
department.
"I can't blame you for wanting to stay here,"
he told her. "I would never leave Seattle. All my family is
here, as well. I love them all, even my sister who has spent the past
six months setting me up with every single woman she knows. It's
getting so I'm afraid to take her calls. The last woman was very
nice, but she had this grating voice…"
He kept on
talking, but Dani wasn't listening. She was too stunned to do
anything but stare at him.
If his sister was setting him up
with women then that meant…"You're not gay?" she
blurted without thinking.
Gary paused in the act of raising up
his container of coffee. Confusion drew his eyebrows together. "You
thought I was gay?"
Oh, God.
She wanted to bolt
from the room and disappear into the crowd outside. How could she
have been wrong about that? What would he think of her? Worse, he was
such a sweet guy and she really liked him and now she'd practically
shouted that there was something about him that made her think he
wasn't into women. No straight guy was going to take that as a
compliment.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, forcing
herself to look at him. "I shouldn't have said that. I didn't
mean…"
So what hadn't she meant? There weren't a
lot of interpretations to "You're not gay?" It wasn't as if
she could pass off the line as him not understanding what she
meant.
She opened her mouth, then closed it again.
Gary
sipped his coffee. "Gay," he said slowly.
"Interesting."
She drew in a breath. Interesting
wasn't bad. "You don't hate me?"
"No. Why would
I?"
"Some men wouldn't consider the comment
flattering."
"I can see that. It makes me want to
dress better."
She risked a smile. "You dress
fine."
"A little too conservative," he said
with a shrug. He glanced down at the ivory shirt and dark slacks he
wore. "My sister keeps getting after me to try a little color.
Maybe a pink shirt," he teased. "Of course that would make
me look more gay."
She felt herself blush. "You're
taking this really well."
"It's kind of exciting.
I've never thought of myself as having a secret life before." He
leaned toward her, his pale gray eyes bright with excitement. "So
what made you think I was gay?"
"I'm not sure.
You're nice and quiet and you've never tried to pick me up. Not that
every man does. I'm not all that."
"You kind of
are," he said.
Dani didn't know how to take that. Was
Gary flirting with her? And if he was, how did she feel about
it?
"You're not married," she said.
"You're
not, either."
"I used to be. My divorce is barely
final."
"Hard time?" he asked
sympathetically.
"No worse than anyone else's, I'm sure,"
she said. "Hugh wasn't a bad guy." She paused. "Wait a
minute. You know what? He was. He was totally awful."
She
explained how she and Hugh had met in college and how in his senior
year, he'd been injured playing football.
"I stood by him
all through his surgery, his therapy," she said. "I'm not
asking for a reward, but I stayed. I loved him and even though I knew
he'd be paralyzed from the waist down forever and that we could never
have a normal physical relationship again, I wanted to marry
him."
"What happened?"
"We got
married. I bullied him into finishing his degree and then continuing
his education. Eventually he got a job as a professor. I worked at
Burger Heaven. I thought we were happy."
They hadn't
been, of course, but she'd thought their problems were just like
everyone else's. A little boredom, a few too many weekends spent on
separate activities.
"It wasn't perfect," she
continued. "But I thought…" She shook her head. "I
was wrong."
"He asked for a divorce?"
"Not
just that. He told me I hadn't grown enough as a person. That I
hadn't kept up with him. It was totally humiliating."
She
remembered wanting to scream at the unfairness of the accusation.
She'd wanted to point out that all her free time had gone into
looking after him and supporting the two of them. If she hadn't grown
it had been because she'd been busting her ass for him.
"Worse,"
she continued, "It turned out to be total crap. He'd been having
an affair with one of his students. Or maybe more. I'm not sure. I
caught him cheating."
"I'm sorry," Gary said
and reached out to take her hand in his.
She let him and then
studied their joined fingers. His touch felt nice. Safe. There wasn't
even one tingle, but after all she'd been through, she'd decided that
sexual attraction was highly overrated.
"So you'll get
over him," he told her. "You'll recover."
"I'm
over Hugh," she said wryly. "If only my sad story ended
there."
"It doesn't?"
"Oh, please.
Why make a fool of myself once when I can easily do it again?"
He
winced. "What happened?"
"Rebound guy. Ryan. He
was perfect. Charming, handsome, caring and everything I needed to
help me get over Hugh. He knew exactly what to say, how to say
it."
"So what was the problem?" Gary
asked.
"He was married. Yup, a lying, cheating weasel
dog. I thought about having him shot. One of my brothers used to be a
Marine. But in the end I let him live."
"Probably
for the best. You wouldn't like prison."
"At least I
wouldn't have to deal with my very tragic love life."
"It
is a unique story," he said.
She smiled. "I agree. I
doubt you can top it."
"I can't. So now what?"
"Now
I find a new job and look for my father. Which is mostly your fault.
You keep talking about the importance of family and now I have to go
for it. I just don't know how to start."
"Have you
tried a private detective?"
She shook her head. "I
never thought of it before. Maybe one could help. I don't have very
much to go on." In truth she had nothing, but miracles
happened.
"I can give you a couple of names. Both really
good at what they do."
She pulled her hand free. "Excuse
me? How does a guy who teaches theology and math know about private
detectives?"
"I'm a man of many
talents."
"Apparently. Okay, sure. Names would be
great."
He pulled a pen out of his jacket pocket and then
passed over a napkin. "Why don't you give me your number and
I'll call you with the information."
Fifteen minutes ago
she wouldn't have hesitated to give him the information. Gay Gary was
safe. But if he wasn't, and why would he lie about that, things were
different. What if he called her for other reasons? Like to ask her
out?
Dani wasn't sure how she felt about that. Getting
involved should be illegal in her case. Yet this was Gary. She liked
him and nothing about him even hinted that he could ever be a threat.
Of course the neighbors of serial killers always went on about how
nice they were.
Still she wrote down her cell number and
passed it back to him. Sometimes you just had to take a chance on
people.