Skulduggery Pleasant: Last Stand of Dead Men (60 page)

Yes.

Good girl. Good girl.

Now watch these witches burn.

tephanie was working her way through a book –
The Stand
, by Stephen King – when Fletcher teleported into her room. She shrieked and bounced off her bed and stumbled against her desk, the book falling to the ground with a thud.

Eyes wide, she stared at him. He had an armful of black clothes, with a pair of boots, a gauntlet and a stick on top. Valkyrie’s stick.

“She’s gone,” he said in a hollow voice.

Stephanie frowned. “Valkyrie?”

“She’s …” Fletcher gave a little laugh. “What am I doing, tiptoeing around it? You know she’s Darquesse. Of course you do. Well, now she’s Darquesse full-time.”

Stephanie straightened up. “What happened?”

“A lot of stuff. She was captured, did you know that? She had a psychic poking around in her head. And then she and Skulduggery came looking for me and it all went wrong. She was surrounded, she was going to be killed. We went after her, but … you should have seen it. There must have been a hundred of them and she – she killed them all. The amount of blood …”

“But she might recover,” Stephanie said.

Fletcher shook his head. “Skulduggery said that Darquesse had slipped out a few times before, but it was never for more than a few minutes. But she’s been Darquesse now for two days. No one knows where she is, no one knows what she’s going to do …”

“How did the others take it?”

“What, you mean the news that Valkyrie’s the one they should have been fighting all along? They don’t know yet. He hasn’t told them. He’s going to tell them today.”

“Does he know you’re here?”

“Skulduggery? No. Why should he? I just thought you needed to know. If you see her, you call me, OK?”

“OK. You brought back her clothes.”

“Yeah.”

“That was nice of you.”

She took them from him and he sat on the bed. “I didn’t know what else to do. Skulduggery’s just gone really quiet and … I don’t have anyone else to talk to. I mean, I just found out yesterday that Ghastly was dead.”

“Oh, God. Fletch, I’m sorry.”

“I’m not sure that he ever liked me, but he talked to me, you know? He always had time to talk.”

“And I’m sorry about Myra as well.”

“Ah, yes, Myra. The girlfriend who tried to kill me. I suppose I should be flattered, actually, that she went to the trouble of starting a fire in her dorm
hoping
that I’d teleport in and save the day. That shows dedication, right? That shows commitment. Not to me, or the relationship, but to her career as a hired killer. You’ve got to admire that. But what a track record, eh? You cheat on me, the next girlfriend tries to kill me …”

“
I
didn’t cheat on you.”

He blinked at her. “Hmm? I know that. Did I say that? Oh, God, I did. Sorry.”

“How about you call me Stephanie?” she said gently. “It might make a difference if you know I have a name.”

“Yeah, sure. Sorry, Stephanie, I didn’t mean you.”

“That’s quite all right, Fletcher. So what’s the plan now? What’s the next move?”

“The plan is to teleport into Roarhaven and shut off the Accelerator, then take down Ravel and find some way to beat Mantis’s army and then the Warlocks, who are on their way. Easy, right? It’s just that Skulduggery’s going to tell the others that Valkyrie is Darquesse. I don’t know how they’re going to take that, or the fact that he kept it from them for all this time. Gordon will be there, too. How’s he going to react?”

“He already knows. You’re meeting at his house?”

“We were over at Finbar’s place, but we have to switch. Y’know, for security reasons. Stephanie, what will Darquesse do? I mean, what does she want?”

“I don’t know.”

“All the psychics say she’ll destroy the world and kill everyone. But Valkyrie wouldn’t do that.”

She sat beside him, and held his hand. “When she’s Darquesse, she’s different, Fletch. To her, it’s not about who she hurts or who she kills, it’s about the feeling she gets when she does it. It makes her … happy.”

“Happy?”

“In a way. It’s kind of freeing, not to be held back by laws or rules or conscience.”

“But she loves her family. She’d never do anything to hurt her family.”

“Fletcher, I can’t think like Darquesse. I can only think like Valkyrie. And you’re right, Valkyrie would never hurt her family, just like I never would. But Darquesse is different.”

“She’ll find a way to beat it. Valkyrie will. She’s strong. She won’t let herself hurt anyone she loves.”

Stephanie turned to him fully. “Valkyrie’s confused. She’s always been confused. She has all these conflicting thoughts and feelings. I’m afraid she mightn’t know what she’s doing.”

Fletcher raised his eyes to hers. “Did she ever love me?”

Stephanie hesitated. She wanted to lie. She wanted to make him feel better. But she couldn’t. “No,” she said. “But she cared about you. She still does.”

“But she didn’t love me.”

“I’m sorry.”

His eyes grew colder. “What about the vampire? Did she love him?”

“No. She barely liked him.”

“Then why was she with him?”

“Because she’s confused. She thought she wanted someone dangerous.”

“What did they—?”

“Oh, Fletcher … what are you trying to do? Are you trying to torture yourself? You’re an amazing guy. You should be with someone who sees that. You should be with someone who appreciates you and … and your cool hair.”

That raised a smile, and she gave him a smile of her own, and then she leaned in and kissed him. For a moment he froze, and then he kissed her back. His left hand went to her face, his thumb stroking her cheek.

Gently, he broke off the kiss. “You’re … not real.”

“Of course I’m real,” she said. She kissed him quickly. “You felt that, didn’t you?” She kissed him again. “And you felt that, right? Valkyrie may not have loved you,” she whispered. “But I can.”

When Fletcher was gone, Stephanie went downstairs and changed Alice’s nappy, then picked up her little sister and smothered her with kisses. Alice laughed so hard she made Stephanie laugh, and just when the laughter was subsiding Stephanie blew a giant raspberry on Alice’s neck that set her off again.

Their mum walked in, smiling.

“Mammy!” Alice said, delighted. “It’s mammy!”

Stephanie passed her over. “You’d swear she hadn’t seen you in days.”

“Oh, she’s a drama queen,” her mum said as Alice wrapped her little arms round her neck. “Were you on the phone just now? I could have sworn I heard two voices coming from upstairs.”

“Radio,” said Stephanie. “Oh, listen, I was thinking I might head over to Gordon’s for a few days.”

The smile faded on her mother’s face. “When?”

Stephanie shrugged. “Now, actually.”

“Do you think that’s wise? The last time you were alone in a house, we were burgled and you were attacked by a crazy girl. And that’s the second time you’ve been attacked in this house.”

“But I’ve never been attacked in
Gordon’s
house,” she said, and technically that was true.

“Steph, I don’t know if I like the idea of you being alone.”

Stephanie smiled. “So what should I do? Develop a phobia about it? Mum, I’ll be fine. I just want to spend a few days by myself, reading books and, you know … thinking about what I’m going to do with my life and stuff.”

“And ‘stuff’, eh? Have you had any more thoughts on that?”

“Some thoughts,” said Stephanie. “No decisions. Not yet. I just need to clear my head.”

Her mum took a moment. “OK, but you call every hour to let me know if you’re OK.”

“Maybe not
every
hour.”

“But close enough.”

“I’ll do my best. I’m just going to change and grab my bag and then I’ll be gone. Love you.”

“Love you back,” said her mum, and they hugged and Stephanie kissed Alice and then she climbed the stairs to her room.

All she’d ever cared about was her family. All she’d ever wanted was to live the life of a normal girl. And now that Valkyrie was gone, all of Stephanie’s dreams were coming true. It should have been perfect. She could now spend time with her parents and her sister while Skulduggery and the others fought their magical wars and dealt with Darquesse.

Only she couldn’t let other people fight for her. That’s not who she was. She had to do something. She had to help. Darquesse was as much her problem as anyone’s. And what if Skulduggery faltered? What if he couldn’t bring himself to deliver the killing blow if the opportunity presented itself? Then Darquesse would more than likely kill him, and who’d be next? Everyone?

Stephanie got changed into Valkyrie’s black clothes and took the Sceptre from its hiding place, placing it and Valkyrie’s stick into a bag already half filled with fresh underwear and T-shirts. She took her phone, transferred some money into her pockets, and grabbed her bag. Then she got in the Oompa-Loompa, and drove to Gordon’s.

She used the back road, the hidden road, approaching the house from the rear, and stopped the car before anyone had a chance to hear the engine. Slinging her bag over her shoulder, she jogged up to the utility door, used her key to open it and slipped inside. Immediately she heard raised voices.

“What the hell were you thinking?” Vex was saying, almost shouting. “The biggest threat the world has ever seen and you had a chance to do something about it and you
didn’t
!”

Skulduggery’s response was too low-key to travel, but Vex’s came through clear as day.

“Bull! You didn’t do what needed to be done because you’re too close to her! You couldn’t bring yourself to do it and now look, look what’s happened. Valkyrie’s gone. Darquesse is free. She’s out there. And that’s
your
fault.”

Stephanie crept out of the utility room, went to the library and took down a set of encyclopaedias. She slid open the hidden hatch and peered into the living room. Skulduggery was standing in the middle of the room. He wasn’t wearing a hat. Vex and Saracen and the Monster Hunters were on their feet, facing him. Fletcher was against the far wall and Sanguine was standing next to Tanith, who was the only one seated.

Gordon came into view, his head down, his face creased with worry. “What do we do?” he asked. “How do we get her back? This is her worst nightmare. This is the one thing she was terrified of.”

Vex glared at him. “You knew about this?”

“Of course I knew,” Gordon snapped, “I’m her uncle. I don’t care if I’m not the
real
Gordon, I’m real enough to love my niece.”

Vex shook his head. “Anyone else know about this little secret?”

Tanith raised her hand. “Me.”

Sanguine stared at her in surprise. “You knew? Why didn’t you tell me? It seems to me that this is information that could be shared with someone you’re gonna marry.”

“Please don’t remind us of that,” said Saracen. “It really creeps us out.”

Vex looked back at Skulduggery. “We went looking for the God-Killers to
stop
Darquesse. We risked our
lives
.”

“And if you had told me what you had planned,” said Skulduggery, “I would have talked you out of it.”

Vex went to the nearest chair and sat in it heavily. He sighed. “There was a time when you wouldn’t have hesitated to kill her.”

“Yeah,” said Saracen, “you really picked a great time to soften up on us.”

“She can still be saved,” Skulduggery said.

“How?” Donegan asked.

“I just need to talk to her. If I talk to her, I can calm her down. I can bring Valkyrie back, you don’t have to worry. I’ve done it before.”

“How do you know she won’t just kill you before you have a chance?”

“Because Darquesse likes to play games. That’s what you have to understand about her. In her own way, she’s an innocent. Every time she emerges, she discovers something new about herself, something more she can do. She’ll pull your arms and legs off, but there won’t be anything malicious behind it. She just wants to find out how easy it is.”

“Yeah,” said Gracious. “That really sounds like we shouldn’t worry.”

“I trusted Valkyrie before,” Skulduggery said. “I trust her now.”