Slave (20 page)

“But I don’t even know her!” I threw my hands up in the air. “She barely talks to me. And even then she edits everything she says.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Lily said.

I stood then, unable to sit, and began pacing. “What do you mean it doesn’t matter? I don’t even know if she wants what I would be able to offer her in the form of a relationship. A relationship that requires . . . demands, communication.”

Lily stood then and walked to me. She took my hands in hers and looked me in the eye. “Stephan, you are a good Master. I know. Any submissive would be happy to serve you. You’re right that she isn’t ready, but it’s only been three weeks. Give it time.”

Hearing movement, Lily dropped my hands and we all turned our heads to see Brianna standing just outside her bedroom door. Her eyes met mine for only a second before lowering to the ground. I reached out my hand and said, “Come. Greet our guests.”

She walked immediately to my side and took my offered hand. I saw Lily smirk. “Hello, Lily. Logan.”

I saw Logan make a subtle movement toward Lily just before she stepped forward and reached for Brianna’s free hand. “Maybe we should leave the boys alone for a little while.”

Lily was tugging on her arm, but Brianna didn’t move an inch. Instead she turned to look up at me, silently asking for permission. I nodded and let go of her hand.

Immediately I felt the loss. Could Lily and Logan be right? Did I love her?

Brianna

When he sent me back to my room to take a nap I went straight to my bed and got under my blanket. I didn’t go right to sleep, though. My mind was still racing over what had happened today.

He said he wasn’t upset with me; that I wasn’t in trouble. My first instinct was not to believe him, to think this was some mind game.

But then something changed and my brain took over as I reminded myself he did not lie to me. If he said I wasn’t in trouble, then I wasn’t. I had to believe that.

Then my mind drifted to when I’d found him hovering over me as I lay fully exposed in my bed. I had been frightened by his presence and what I was sure would happen. But something in me wanted him to be pleased with how I looked. I knew there were ugly scars on my body. Ian had enjoyed marking me in many ways.

As I felt his fingers touch my breast and call me beautiful, I’d almost started crying. He thought I was beautiful. The word was almost reverent as it left his lips.

When his mouth met mine it had been different than the times in the past. It had been harder, more possessive. Then he’d commanded me to kiss him and something inside me rose to the challenge.

I remembered the feel of him as he’d pulled me up and pressed me against his chest. Even though the kiss was more aggressive than any in the past, it was still very different than what I’d received before coming to live with Stephan.

The want to make him happy surged through me as I felt his tongue press against my lips. I knew what he wanted, and I granted it to him without pause.

Then suddenly he’d gone. I didn’t know what I’d done wrong even after his soft words took the sting out of his harsh ones.

Finally I’d been able to fall asleep remembering his gentle words to me just before coming to my room. I could still feel his arms surrounding me as I closed my eyes and sleep took me for the second time that day.

The first thing I became aware of when I opened my eyes was that there were voices coming from the main room. I couldn’t make out what they were saying, but I knew Master was not alone, and I was unsure what to do.

After about ten minutes of indecision, I figured that it would be better to show myself. Master would not like me hiding in my room.

When I stepped through my door, the first thing I saw was Lily standing there holding my Master’s hands. I didn’t know why, but I didn’t like it. They were friends, but there was something about the way she was doing it that wasn’t right.

Just then Master saw me, and Lily stepped back. That was when I noticed the other person in the room was Logan.

My attention didn’t linger long as I saw movement and turned my attention back to Master. He’d extended his hand, clearly wanting me to take it, and told me to come to him. I walked quickly to his side and linked my hand with his. Instantly I felt better.

I was slightly disappointed when Lily wanted us to leave the room and looked up to Master hoping he’d say no. Instead he nodded, and I knew there was no getting out of it.

Reluctantly, I released his hand and let Lily pull me back into my bedroom where she headed straight for my closet and began pulling out clothes and holding them up. I only heard about every other word that she said. My thoughts were in the other room with my Master.

Then Lily was in front of me with a strange look on her face. “Are you okay?”

“Yes,” I said and nodded.

“Are you sure? Cause if you need to talk . . .” She left the sentence hanging as if waiting for me to speak.

I thought for a minute and then decided there was something I wanted to ask her. “How long have you known . . . ?” She’d asked me to call him Stephan with her, but I just couldn’t do it.

Her expression changed to one of puzzlement. “We met at a party a little over two years ago.”

Two years. That wasn’t a long time, and the way she’d touched him . . .

We stood in silence for several long minutes. It was the longest I’d ever heard Lily go without talking, and that made me curious. Reaching down into the depths of my being, I made myself ask the question burning in my brain. “Were you . . . were you his slave?”

A frown crossed Lily’s features, and then she took my hands in hers. “No,” she said softly. “I was never Stephan’s slave and neither are you.”

What was she talking about? Of course I was his slave. He bought me.

But before I could ask her to explain there was a knock on my door. Logan’s head peeked in, and he smiled at me shyly but didn’t enter. “Are you ready, Lily?”

She seemed to hesitate. It wasn’t until Master joined Logan at the door that she sighed. Then, after giving me a brief hug, she joined Logan.

I saw her whisper something to Master. His brow furrowed slightly before going back to the smooth features that I was so used to seeing from him. And then with a quick wave she was gone, leaving me standing in my bedroom staring at my Master with even more questions.

Brianna

He didn’t stare very long before he turned and followed the path of our guests. I stood rooted to my spot until I heard voices again and the door opening. I came out of my room to find Master closing the door. He slowly turned to me, and I dropped my eyes to the floor.

I heard every step he took as he moved closer to where I stood. My mind was racing more with every footfall. If I wasn’t his slave, then what was I? What had she whispered to him at my bedroom door? And what about the way she touched him before? Why did that bother me?

All my questioning came to an abrupt halt as Master stopped right in front of me. My head was bowed, and I could feel his breath fanning my hair. He was so close.

We stood not speaking for several long minutes before he finally broke the silence. “Come,” he said, in a soft controlled voice before turning on his heel and marching to his chair.

I followed. He sat and opened his arms to me. I sat down on his lap and felt his arms surround me. His warmth wrapped around me, and I instantly felt better, calmer.

All was quiet again for several minutes. Usually his hand would gently rub up and down my arm, but tonight both were still. Finally, I felt him shift beneath me and say, “We need to talk about today.” I nodded.

Minutes passed again before he continued, “Before we start, do you remember the number system I gave you earlier?”

I nodded again, but that wasn’t good enough as he commanded me to answer him verbally. “Yes, Master.”

“Repeat back to me what I told you.”

“Whenever you ask, I am to give you the number between one and ten that tells you how uncomfortable I am at that time.”

“Very good,” he nodded. “And what are you to say should you reach the number eight?”

“Yellow,” I answered obediently.

“And the number ten?” he questioned.

“Red.”

He nodded again, and this time he rubbed his hand up and down my arm, letting me know he was pleased with my answers. “I want you to use this system even when I don’t ask you, Brianna.”

There was silence again, and I realized he was waiting for me to speak. The problem was I didn’t understand what he meant.

“I don’t understand,” I said honestly. The last thing I wanted was to mess up because I didn’t know what was required of me.

Master sighed. “It means that I want you to constantly keep that number system in your head and if . . . when you get to an eight, I want you to say the word
yellow
.” Then he pulled my chin up so that I was looking directly into his eyes. “Even if I don’t ask you.”

He waited, as if letting this information sink in before asking, “Do you understand?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Repeat it.”

I took a deep breath and repeated almost word for word everything he’d said. At the end, he seemed pleased.

“That goes for
red
as well. If you reach a ten at any time . . .” He paused and gave me a look that left me no doubt as to how seriously he took his next words. “You are to say
red
immediately.”

I nodded. “I understand, Master.”

“Okay then, let’s get started.”

I tensed up instantly. There was no doubt in my mind that he felt it, too, but Master didn’t comment. Instead, he asked me where I wanted to start. All the questions from before began swirling in my head, but I wanted to think about them more before I brought them up to him. They weren’t what he was asking me about anyway.

In the end, I decided to ask what had been the most pressing question on my mind prior to Lily and Logan’s arrival. “Are you going to take my books away?”

But instead of answering me, he asked, “Do you feel you should have your books taken away?”

“I . . . I guess,” I said, defeated.

“Why?”

“Because I wasn’t paying attention,” I whispered.

“Hmm,” he said, as if considering what I had just said. “To me it looked like you were having a panic attack, Brianna. Am I wrong?”

A panic attack? I had never thought of it like that. Was that what it was?

Obviously I was silent for too long. “Tell me what happened after you went back to the dressing room,” he said, softly stroking my hair.

“I took off the clothes,” I said softly. If I weren’t sitting with my face inches from his, he would not have been able to hear me. “Then I heard voices,” I said even lower. “And then . . .” I stopped because after that I really wasn’t sure what happened. One second I’d been in the dressing room changing clothes and then the next minute I’d been kneeling in front of Ian.

“Then . . . ?” he prompted.

“I wasn’t . . .” I gasped. Just remembering was making the panic rise again, and it was then that I knew he was right. I’d had a panic attack.

Through my rising heartbeat and my labored breathing, I heard him tell me to focus, to remember the numbers, to remember I was safe with him in his home. It helped. The fear gripping me slowly ebbed, and I was able to take in my surroundings again.

We sat there in his chair for the next two hours talking about the day, about everything that had happened. He made me tell him about Ian breaking my arm. “Which arm,” he asked. When I’d shown him, his response was to pick up said arm and place a soft kiss directly in the middle. It was an unbelievably sweet thing, but one I had started to expect from him.

When we got to the kiss in my bed, he asked me to tell him how I felt about it. I tried, but my words were weak and feeble. I’d stuttered and stopped several times around words like nice, scared, happy, and confused. Finally, he took hold of my face and said, “I told you the truth today, Brianna.”

His eyes left me no doubt that he was talking about his declaration that he wanted me but would not take me until I asked. I wondered again why that was important to him. He said he wanted all of me, but he
had
all of me. I was his slave after all. He owned me. Right?

I sat in his arms pondering what he’d said. He would not have sex with me until I asked. The question that came to my mind however was, would I
ever
ask?

Stephan

The talk with Brianna had been difficult for both of us. I’d almost lost her twice to panic attacks as she told me about her time with Ian, those experiences were still so real for her.

Dinner was solemn. I could only imagine what was going through her mind as we ate. Mine was focused on what Lily had whispered to me just before she left. Brianna had asked her how long she and I had known each other. I wasn’t sure of the significance of this, but Lily seemed to think it was an important piece of information for me to have.

After dinner we settled back into my chair and just watched some television. I’d never spent so much time with a woman before, and I found myself devoting most of it to watching her more than what was on the screen.

At the end of the night, we followed our normal ritual. With what had happened earlier I wanted to give her control of our kiss tonight. She pressed her lips to mine with more pressure than her usual kisses but nothing compared to this afternoon. I moved my mouth with hers, enjoying the only closeness from her that I was able. My hands itched to find purchase in her hair, but this was her kiss, she had the control.

Slowly she pulled away and raised her eyes to meet mine shyly. But before I could say anything, she rose from my lap. She waited for me to get up and walked just behind me until we reached the section of wall separating our two rooms. “Goodnight, Brianna.”

“Goodnight, Master.”

I waited until she disappeared into her room before walking into mine for my nightly shower.

Monday morning started out fairly normal, for which I was eternally grateful. There had been no Karl and no Lily waiting for me when I arrived. Jamie brought a bottle of water in for me just before ten, and I gave her instructions to hold my calls from twelve to one.

It had been over two weeks since I’d done more than a speedy workout in the small executive gym down the hall. I’d had one of the old offices that had previously been used for storage converted into a gym almost immediately upon taking my full time position. Fitness had not been a high priority for my father, but it was for me. Given my lifestyle choice, I needed to be in excellent shape.

All of the executives were invited to use the space, although not many of them did besides Lily. Of course, her reasons for staying in shape were the same as my own.

At twelve o’clock I locked down my computer and changed into my workout clothes before heading down to the gym. Jamie smiled and waved to me as I walked past. It was good to feel some normalcy again.

After some basic stretches, I got on the treadmill and began walking. A mile registered on the machine, and I began picking up the pace. Soon I was running and it felt wonderful.

When the timer went off, I was drenched and feeling good. Moving over to the free weights, I began my regular routine of curls and presses. My muscles were feeling the burn when I heard the door open and Jamie’s frantic voice. “He doesn’t wish to be disturbed.”

When I turned, I saw my uncle standing just inside the door, trailed by a rarely flustered Jamie.

“I’m so sorry, Mr. Coleman.”

“It’s okay, Jamie.”

She hesitated for a moment, giving my uncle one last look, and then left.

Figuring my workout was pretty much over at this point, I replaced the weights and started stretching. I didn’t address my uncle’s presence. He’d been clear on his position regarding Brianna, and I had no desire to hear more from him.

When he realized I was just going to ignore him, he asked, “Aren’t you curious why I drove across town to see you in the middle of the day?”

“Not really, no, but I’m assuming you’re going to tell me.”

I heard something land on one of the benches. Whatever it was wasn’t heavy. “I brought the results of Brianna’s lab work. Everything came back clean.”

For just a moment my heart softened toward my uncle. He’d driven through traffic on his lunch hour to hand deliver the results.

“Thank-you,” I said with sincerity.

He didn’t respond to my thanks. That put me on alert, and I was not disappointed.

“Stephan, I wish you would reconsider getting her professional help. I have no idea what happened to her, but you have to—”

That was it, the last straw. “I am not discussing this with you,” I said, finality in my tone.

This seemed to silence him for a few minutes. I turned to pick up the towel I’d brought in with me and the envelope he’d thrown down on the bench. My workout was over. I needed to get back to my office and shower.

He followed me out into the hall and down to my office. Jamie was still looking wary as we passed, and I tried to send her a reassuring smile.

Continuing to ignore my uncle, I walked straight to my closet, took the suit I’d hung up less than an hour ago, and headed into my bathroom.

The shower felt good. I wanted to linger underneath the spray, but I knew Richard wasn’t finished and would be waiting for me.

Drying off and dressing quickly, I exited my bathroom to find my uncle sitting in the chair directly across from my desk and looking deep in thought.