Sliding (The Stone Series) (21 page)

“Well, I’m happy to hear that your doctor doesn’t compare to me. It’s
weird but I think I’m a little jealous of her touching you. I want to always be
the only one who does those things to you.”

I assure him that doctors don’t count and he rolls over and kisses me.

“You’re so cute Brooklynn. I love you.”

I respond, “I love you too, Tate and you’re cuter!”

I ask Tate what happened with him and Steve’s brother. Tate starts his
tale of earlier today.

“I called Bobby and Eric took us over there. I rang their doorbell and Chris
answered the door. When he saw me he smirked knowing full well why I was there.
He actually admitted it to me before I even said a word to him. He said, “Looks
like I might get a piece of ass from an Adams girl before you do pussy.” He
actually had the fucking nerve to say that to me. Can you fucking believe that asshole?”

I am looking at Tate with my mouth wide open.

Tate continues, “I punched that fucker in the stomach, grabbed him,
dragged him out of his house and told him if he lays one God damn hand on your
little sister I will beat the fucking living shit out of him. Eric and Bobby
each gave him a shot and told him if he didn’t stay away from Katrina they
would kick his ass too. He stayed on the ground and didn’t even try to fight
back, fucking pussy.”

I don’t know how I feel about all of this. I don’t want Tate fighting but
the fact that he is standing up for my sister touches me. She had better be
single when I get home or I am telling my mom and my dad, that’ll fix her for
good; my dad will have a heart attack if I tell him what Chris said to Tate.
   

When I see her in those pigtails
she wears and her sports bra and short shorts and I get hard before she’s even
standing next to me. I’ve no clue how I am going to be able to run in this
condition. I can’t help where my mind is going. Thinking about fucking her hot
sweaty body is a huge turn on. Watching her run and keep up with me is an even
bigger turn on; I am amazed that she is able to keep up with me as well as she
does. Not even Bobby is able to keep up my pace for long but Brook is so
competitive that she won’t admit to being near death. She keeps running alongside
me sweating and looking super-hot, it’s very distracting.

************

I refocus my attention to our session when Drew asks, “Let’s talk about
why you decided to wait so long to start a family. Was it because of your
careers?”

Tate and I make eye contact and watch as Bernie and Drew do the same. I
sigh and quietly say, “Tate didn’t want to have children. I wonder if he still
doesn’t, if he’s only agreeing now for me because he doesn’t want to lose me.”

Drew looks at me, “Should he be afraid of losing you if he doesn’t want
to have children?” he questions. I shrug my shoulders, “No.”

Drew then looks to Tate for confirmation of my accusation and Tate puts
his head down embarrassed and mumbles, “I don’t like sharing her, sharing her
attention. It’s fucked up, I know. It’s an only child thing.”

Drew tells Tate this might be an issue to explore first in more depth in
their private sessions so we move on to my concerns about my miscarriage. I
feel responsible for it because of my eating disorders but at the same time I
blame Tate. I have never admitted this to him but I think now might be the
right time.

“I blame myself for not taking better care of my body but I also blame
Tate for his drinking and drug use and his reaction when I told him. It was
bad.” Tate looks up at me as if he’s surprised I knew about the drugs.

“Yes Tate, I’m not an idiot. I know you were or maybe you still are doing
coke. I knew what was going on when you would come home at three in the morning
and never go to sleep then crash and be done for days. I remember the signs; I
remember what it does to you. I wasn’t innocent when we were younger, don’t you
remember?”

Tate puts his head down again and quietly says, “I’m so sorry, Brooklynn.
You have every reason to hate me, you should leave me. I’ve been telling you since
the beginning that you deserve better than me.”

“Why are you saying that? Why do I deserve better than you? What have you
done that is so bad that I should leave you? Are you having an affair?” I ask
through blurred vision because I am sobbing my heart out on that last question.

I want an answer but I don’t want it to be yes and I’m so frightened that
it will be. Tate comes to me and grabs me into a hug.

“There isn’t anyone else. No one could ever compare to you. I have been
in love with you my entire life baby, I wouldn’t know how to love another
woman” Tate says as the timer clings and our session ends. I momentarily wonder
if Drew and Bernie are thinking the same thing I am; Tate never really answered
my question.

As I listen to Brook during our
therapy session something nags in the back of my mind. Then I am taken aback by
my own discovery. It had never really occurred to me until just then. She is
all I’ve ever needed but I am not enough for her, I’ve never been. First it was
her friends, then cheerleading then her career. She has always been enough for
me in my heart.

We go out to lunch and sit in silence until we order. I feel as if Tate
has been watching every morsel of food I put in my mouth since I admitted to my
eating disorder, I guess it is only fair, I do the same to him around drugs and
alcohol. I order a salad with dressing on the side that I pretend to use but
never really let touch my lettuce. Tate has a baked chicken sandwich with a
side salad; he’s never going to let himself get fat either so I’m not sure why
he’s so worried about my eating habits.

We make eye contact and smile at each other while we eat and finally Tate
breaks our silence while he takes my hand in his, “Brook, talk to me. We can
work this all out can’t we? We can just talk; we don’t need Bernie and Drew.
Talk to me.”

So I talk, I talk to my husband.

“Do you want a baby Tate yes or no. I mean really want one, not want one
because I do.”

Tate sighs, “If it was just up to me then honestly no, I wouldn’t want
one. But yes I want a baby for you, because you want one. Of course I’m going
to love our child it’s not like I’m going to be a fucking absentee father or
anything Brook. It’s just my father” Tate lets that hang in the air for a
moment before he continues. “I’ve always liked our life; you’re all I’ve ever
needed. I’m just not enough for you, I get it.”

I roll my eyes at Tate, “You’re enough for me Tate but a family, a baby
will complete us, make us better. It’s not going to make me love you less or
change us.”

Tate frowns, “It will change us Brook, it will. How could it not. And now
with what happened the first time. What if it happens again and you’re not as
lucky as last time? What if something happens to you, Brook I would kill myself
if I allowed myself to agree to this and it caused me to lose you.”

I feel like we are spinning in circles. Before I can say another word
Tate gets a text and his face goes white.

 
“Let’s go” he commands and throws
money on the table and leads me to the car.

“What’s going on?” I ask him.

“Have you spoken to anyone, told anyone exactly where we are?”

I’m scared now but I answer quickly, “No, well only Heidi and our dancers
but I was planning on calling Asia later today and maybe asking her and Ted to
come out and stay with us for a while, why? You’re scaring me. Tell me what
that text was about.”

Tate rushes me into the car and doesn’t answer me. Instead he calls
Dominick. “Dom, what the fuck is going on? You said all this shit would go
away. You said you had it all under control. Well, get it fucking back under
control… now. This cannot…just fix this!” Tate hangs up.

“Tate, tell me what’s happening, I’m scared.”

Tate puts his hand on my knee and gives it a squeeze.

“Dominick will handle everything, there’s nothing for you to worry about.
There’s been a little threat made and until I tell you otherwise you are not to
tell anyone where we are exactly. Dominick is getting you security and we are
switching hotels. Hey, I have a better idea. Let’s look at houses. We can buy
something out here and if we decide to go back East we’ll use it as a vacation
and business home. What do you think?”

I can’t think, this is all happening so fast I can’t process any of it.
Tate seems to be taking it all in stride as he has just pulled into the
doctor’s office.

“We’re still going to the appointment?” I ask confused.

“Yes, Dominick is waiting for us here, we’ll be safe. And he has called
in his team; they’re working on finding where the threat came from and if it
means anything. They’ll have someone cleared to be your security in a few hours
until then you don’t go anywhere without me and Dominick.” Tate demands.

“I think we should reschedule, I don’t feel comf…” I try to finish but
Tate interrupts me and shouts, “No, I will not have our lives ruined over this
mother fucking shit. Now let’s go.”

When I don’t move he reaches out his hand and says, “Sorry, I didn’t mean
to yell at you. I’m a little freaked out too, okay? But I don’t want you to
worry. Let’s just try to relax and forget about the whole thing and meet the
doctor, alright?”

I nod and give him my hand allowing him to help me out of the passenger
seat but I’m not sure I’ll be able to forget what’s happening if while the
doctor is performing a pelvic exam Dominick is hover in the corner.

When we get out of the car Dominick comes to meet us and escorts us into
the building. The office is very inviting and the receptionist is friendly. She
gives me a ton of paperwork and I sit down with my clipboard and pen. Tate and
Dominick take advantage of the paperwork I have to fill out and they have a
private conversation on the other side of the room. When I am called in Tate
takes me by my hand, gives his cell to Dominick and we follow the nurse to a
room. When the nurse sees Tate approaching us she actually sighs! Thankfully
Dominick remains in the waiting room for me and for this poor nurse. If she
also had to endure being in his company along with Tate’s I think she might
combust. The nurse reviews my paperwork and thanks me for completing it while
staring at my husband. She says the doctor will look it over then be in to see
us, we’ll talk first then I can have an exam. She backs out of the room to get
as much eye time with Tate as possible. Tate rolls his eyes at me when she
leaves. Having women make eye babies with my husband will never be my favorite
thing to witness especially when waiting to speak to a fertility specialist.

Dr. Baxter is a young woman in her late thirties. She is tall and skinny
and dressed beautifully. She also notices Tate the minute she walks into the
room. I always forget how attractive he is until he is introduced to a new
woman who can’t help but stare for a minute and Dr. Baxter is no different from
the rest. She clears her throat to settle herself and introduces herself to me
first, shaking my hand and then Tate’s. I notice Tate’s hand takes longer for
her to release. Tate as usual tries to act oblivious to the events occurring.
Dr. Baxter says she has read my chart and would love to take me on as a
patient. She says she’ll have to do an exam and run some tests but that she
believes I should be able to conceive again and carry a baby to term. We review
my medical history and I feel bold so I ask, “Was it my fault do you think? The
miscarriage?”

“Brook, no, honey it wasn’t, stop this. It was my fault. I never should
have reacted the way I did. I caused you too much stress that’s what…” Tate
starts to say but is stopped by Dr. Baxter who says, “I see this every day and
you both need to stop this right now. Neither of you caused the miscarriage.
They unfortunately happen sometimes and the best thing for you both is too move
beyond it and look forward to a new pregnancy.”

We both nod and she instructs me to get undressed. I do as I am told and
lay on the table with my feet in the stirrups. Tate looks as uncomfortable as
possible. “Should I, uh…maybe I should go see if Dominick.”

“No, Mr. Taylor, you should stay right her with your wife. If you’re
going to be a daddy, this experience will be nothing compared to the delivery.
So get used to it now.”

Okay, I like this lady now. If she needs to look at my eye candy husband
from time to time so be it because she can also put him in his place. Other
than his mother and me, I have never met another woman who can.

“Uh, I’m sorry for staring Mr. Taylor but you look so familiar. Have we met
before?”

“I don’t think we have. Maybe you recognize me from the media coverage I
get sometimes. I’m in the music industry.”

“Yes, that’s why you look familiar. Not from the media but that’s how I
just placed why you look so familiar to me. You have a cousin, Damian, Damian
Stone, don’t you? You look similar.”