Authors: Holly Martin
He walked in and realised Sally had already opened up; she had keys so she could do just that if she arrived when he wasn’t there. Jack was sitting watching her astutely and Seb guessed she was eating a packet of crisps and smuggling some to him.
‘Are you OK down here for a bit?’ he asked, moving to the bottom of the stairs. ‘I need to send some emails, make some phone calls regarding stock.’
‘Yeah sure, you go ahead,’ Sally said, writing the specials board in her beautiful sloping handwriting.
‘And stop feeding him crisps.’ He gestured to Jack.
Sally turned and laughed at him. ‘You caught me.’
As she turned back, he watched her. She was very pretty, young, tanned, blonde hair. She reminded him a little of Marie, when he’d first met her, in looks anyway. It would be so much easier if he’d fallen in love with Sally instead of Amy. Why was love so inconvenient, not giving any thought to the problems it caused as it weaved its spell over the heart?
He walked up the stairs and found Amy asleep in his bed. Yesterday had probably done more damage than he’d thought and her body needed time to heal. He smiled; either that or he’d worn her out that morning.
He gently shook her awake. She blinked a few times, then seeing him she smiled.
‘I need to talk to you,’ he said, sitting down in the chair on the other side of the room, so he wouldn’t be tempted to touch her.
Her face fell, and she sat up, holding the sheet to her chest. ‘Please don’t tell me this morning was a once only thing, that it can never happen again, I couldn’t take it.’
‘I hope not. Listen… you know you’re the first since Marie, that there has never been anyone else?’
She nodded in confusion.
He sighed. ‘I’m falling for you.’
‘I love you too, you know that,’ she said, a frown creasing her forehead.
‘Yes, well I thought so… I know there have been other men for you but…’
‘There’s been no one since I fell in love with you, no one for six months.’
He swallowed. She had been in love with him for six months, he had denied her for all that time but she’d never given up, never found someone else.
‘I guess what I’m saying is that I would hope that whilst we’re together there won’t be anyone else for you.’
A look of hurt crossed her face. ‘I would never… I may have been with a few men in my time, but I never screwed around. I don’t cheat on my boyfriends and I never will.’
‘I know, I didn’t think you were the sort to sleep around. I’m sorry, I…’ This was so difficult. He could hardly come out and ask her if she was a prostitute. He didn’t think she was the sort to do that either, it was a ridiculous accusation, but what else would she be doing in her bedroom, naked with a man who paid her?
‘Are you… OK for money?’
She pulled her knees up to her chest protectively, and he knew he’d struck a chord.
‘What’s happened? This morning, you were all over me, couldn’t keep your hands off me. Now you sit over there, afraid to touch me, accusing me of sleeping around and asking me if I’m OK for money. Who have you been talking to?’ Then her face cleared. ‘Judith, she told you about Jackson, didn’t she, told you that I’m a prostitute?’
‘Yes.’
‘And you want to know if it’s true?’
He didn’t answer but his silence spoke volumes.
The look of hurt that crossed her face pierced straight through his heart, but it was quickly replaced by anger. She got out of bed, completely naked, and started throwing her things back in her bag, stuffing them in so angrily that the bag ripped around the zip.
‘Amy, what are you doing?’
‘What does it look like I’m doing? I’m leaving. I’m not sharing a bed with someone who has so much contempt and so little regard for me.’
He quickly got up and moved round to the other side of the bed to stop her, but she pushed him away when he came close.
‘Amy, stop, please, this is ridiculous, talk to me.’ He caught her wrist, but she slapped his hand away. Grabbing her shoulders instead, he swung her round to face him, and was surprised to see tears in her eyes. Apart from in the car after the accident yesterday, he had never seen her cry before. ‘Tell me then, tell me how wrong I’ve got it?’
‘No, I won’t tell you anything, you can make your own mind up about me, which clearly, with a little help from Judith, you already have. I’ve seen the looks that Judith gives me when Jackson leaves, I know what she thinks. I’m a slut, you’ve slept with a slut, and now you’re wondering how much I’ll charge you for this morning’s antics. Well, I tell you what, darling – that one was on the house.’
She shoved him hard and threw on a knee-length blue wrap dress, which she quickly tied around her waist.
‘God damn it, Amy, what am I supposed to think? A man turns up every week and you go up to the bedroom for an hour, closing the curtains. Judith has seen you walking around naked in the bedroom whilst he’s in there and he pays you for it after.’
She sat on the bed and pulled on a pair of black leather knee-high boots. He was so turned on right now, her anger, her being completely naked under the dress, now these boots, did she have any idea what she did to him?
‘You’re supposed to trust me. If you loved me, you’d trust me.’
‘You’ve not given me anything to trust, you’ve not told me anything. If you tell me you’re not a prostitute I’ll believe you – even better than that, tell me exactly why Jackson Cartwright is in your bedroom whilst you’re naked and then I can truly trust you.’
She stood up. ‘I told you there hasn’t been anyone else in the last six months, longer than that in fact. No one has kissed me or touched me since I fell in love with you. That includes anyone that might pay for the privilege. But that isn’t enough for you…’
‘It’s enough.’ He was actually starting to panic now, he couldn’t lose her.
She stared at him with contempt then walked past him to grab the last few things. ‘I’m not going to have a relationship with anyone who thinks so little of me.’
He caught her hand as she walked back past him again. ‘I’m sorry, I really am. I trust you. I guess I got scared that this didn’t mean as much to you as it did to me.’
She stared at him for a moment, then took his hand still holding hers and pressed it to her heart. It was thundering against her chest. ‘That’s how much you mean to me.’
He bent his head and softly kissed her chest, between his fingers, then lifted his head to kiss her on the mouth, but she put a finger on his lips to stop him.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said and was relieved to see the fire in her eyes lessen slightly. He put his arms round her waist. ‘Look, if you walked into my bedroom and found me walking round naked in front of another girl, would you just smile and walk back out again? If you saw me then paying the girl would you still be smiling?’
‘I’d trust you.’ Her voice was calmer now, quieter.
‘You’d never ask me about it, you’d just carry on as normal? Because that’s all I was doing – I was asking, not accusing.’
‘No, I wouldn’t ask.’
He smirked. ‘Bullshit.’
She looked away so he wouldn’t spot the smile, but he’d already seen it.
‘OK, I’d kill her, then I’d kill you, then I’d ask questions later.’
He laughed.
She looked back at him and sighed. ‘I don’t want to tell you now what it is I do with Jackson. I don’t want to see that same look of disgust that I see when Judith looks at me in your eyes. Telling you doesn’t do it justice, but I will show you. Four o’clock, Saturday afternoon at White Cliff Bay town hall.’
He frowned slightly.
‘Trust me.’
‘Does this mean that you’re going to stay?’
She looped her arms round his neck. ‘What will you offer me if I do?’
He moved his hands up her back and deftly undid the bow holding the dress together, then pushed the dress off her shoulders, letting it fall to the floor. ‘Anything you want.’
She kissed him, and he pushed her gently against the wall, his hands wandering down her thighs.
‘Anything?’ she asked, already undoing the buttons on his shirt.
‘Anything, on one condition.’
She closed her eyes as his hands explored her body. ‘Mmmm, what’s that?’
‘You keep those boots on.’
She laughed loudly but then the laugh was gone as he found the one place that had made her scream so loudly earlier that morning.
G
eorge was waiting
in his lounge, nervously. This was his fourth date with Libby, even though it was technically their second date – or was it their third as his beautiful island date didn’t officially count? Either way, he was damned sure he was going to get a kiss out of it. He had been thinking about it all day. They had held hands, he had held the door open for her, hugged her, danced with her and did all the things normally associated with a date apart from a kiss. So tonight he was going to get one.
He had thought about asking her to kiss him, as part of his research. She could rate him out of ten maybe, but then he thought she might say no and that would be awkward.
So he had thought about creating a romantic moment where, if it had been a real date, he could kiss her. And then after, it could easily be put down to research, going through the motions of a date; it could easily be laughed off. But there might not be any romantic moments tonight.
So he had decided he would do it now, when she came to call for him. He would greet her as he would do any other date and then kiss her. But now he had decided it, he was a bag of nerves; his palms were sweaty, his heart thundering in his chest. What if he was a crap kisser? But if he was bad, she would be sweet enough to teach him how to do it, how she liked it, which could only mean more kissing.
So he would just grab her and kiss her and…
There was Libby’s door. She was coming.
He quickly wiped his palms on his jeans and opened the door. She was standing right in front of him, gesturing to her flat, her mouth open about to speak and he bent his head down and kissed her.
L
ibby stood frozen
in shock for a moment, her words still trapped in her throat, so as he kissed her, a noise came out of her mouth that sounded like ‘amerghhst’. She wondered if this was what it was like to pass out, to faint. Her mind had shut down, all thoughts went out of her head, she wasn’t aware of anything, there was nothing else but his hot lips moving against hers, his hands on her face. Her hands moved almost instinctively to his waist, her heart pounding in her ears, and just as her brain kicked into life, just as she moved her lips against his, just as she started to move her tongue into his mouth, he released her.
‘Hi,’ he said, sheepishly, still holding her face.
‘Hi,’ she said, her voice coarse. She felt a stupid grin cross her face and could do nothing to stop it. She cleared her throat and tried to find something else to say, but her head was blank. ‘Hi,’ she said again, when nothing else was forthcoming.
‘Was that OK?’ He stepped back, his eyes suddenly anxious.
‘What?’ There had been something she had been going to say, but all that was gone now.
‘As the start of our date, was it too soon, too intimate?’
Her mind started to clear, the fog suddenly lifting. ‘Our date, yes of course, I… I… no, a second date would probably be the right time for a first kiss. Though maybe not at the beginning, normally at the end. If you kiss like that you’d probably not actually get on the date, I’d be pushing you back into your flat and grappling you onto the sofa.’
She touched her lips nonchalantly. God, she had to step back away from him just to stop herself from doing just that.
‘Really?’ He grinned. ‘And… my technique?’
What had his technique been like? It had taken her so long to catch up with what he was doing and then it was over. She wanted more, she knew that. She wanted to kiss him back properly this time, not just stand there with her mouth half open.
‘I… don’t think it went on long enough for me to judge that,’ she said, awkwardly, suddenly hoping he would give her a second chance.
To her absolute delight he stepped forward, bending his head to kiss her again just as a flash of blonde hair caught her eye at the bottom of the steps leading up to the flats. Giselle.
Libby quickly pushed George back before Giselle saw them. He looked disappointed and hurt but realisation crossed his face as the front door swung open.
Giselle smiled at them both as she went up the stairs. The last thing Libby wanted was for these practice dates to ruin George’s chances with Giselle, although the far more selfish side of her wanted to carry them on forever. Christmas Eve was in four days and then they would stop and she would hand over her best friend to the woman upstairs. She suddenly couldn’t help the feeling that she would also be handing over the other half of her heart.
They heard Giselle’s door close upstairs.
‘Should we…?’ George looked like he didn’t know whether to kiss her or not. The moment had gone.
‘How about if the moment grabs you tonight – one of those “go with the flow” moments you were talking about – you take it. And I’ll mark you out of ten on it if you do.’
‘And maybe, if the moment doesn’t present itself whilst we are at the ski centre, we could come back and… practise kissing later.’
Libby smiled at this new confidence that was starting to bloom. George would never have kissed her a week ago or tried to plan a session of kissing either.
‘Maybe,’ she said, noncommittally.
She honestly didn’t know how much further she could take these practice dates. She had never fallen in love before, but she knew she had never been with a man who evoked such feelings in her. It didn’t feel like he was her friend any more, it was more than that. Her heart was filled with him. She wanted to touch him, to be touched by him and not just in the sense of sleeping with him, although she did want that too, but she wanted to hug him, be held by him. She wanted to spend every spare second with him. All her worries about trusting someone enough to be with them for the rest of her life hadn’t even reared their head when she was with George. Every romantic moment she was spending with George was another step closer to falling in love with him. If she was going to stay, would they still be able to be best friends at the end of this? Did he have any interest in her at all? And if he didn’t, would it break her heart to watch him walk away with Giselle?
George’s voice interrupted her thoughts. ‘We really should go or we’ll be late again.’
L
ibby laughed
as she watched George climb up the slope towards her, shaking the snow out of his hair. Despite falling off the sledge every time he hit the bottom of the slope, he still had the biggest grin on his face. She had an overwhelming urge to hug him, so in the spirit of the date she flung both arms round his back as she leaned her head on his chest. He didn’t even bat an eye as he hugged her back.
George had pulled out every stop, making sure that every item on the list was ticked off. A gift of a teddy dressed in a full ski suit and goggles was stuffed inside her locker which he had presented to her with his ‘five days before Christmas’ song. They had shared a portion of chips before their sledging session had started. And as for the part of the checklist that mentioned looking at the person she was with and realising she wanted to spend the rest of her life with them, she knew she was already there.
‘Thank you for tonight, I’ve had the best time,’ Libby said.
George kissed her forehead. ‘Me too. Last go. Shall we go down together?’
‘Won’t we be too heavy?’
He shrugged. ‘It’ll be fun though.’
She nodded and he sat on the back of the sledge and she sat in between his legs. He wrapped his arms around her and they used their legs to push themselves off. They zoomed off down the slope and, where Libby thought the extra weight would slow them down, it had the complete opposite effect and made them go much faster than she had ever gone before on her own.
She laughed and screamed before the scream died in her throat as they began to head for a bank of snow with no sign of stopping or slowing down. The sledge hit the bank, slid to the top and deposited them both over the edge. Libby hit the soft snow on the other side hard and a second later George landed on top of her.
They were hidden there between the snow bank and a poster advertising skiing lessons and she stared up at her best friend with a smile.
‘Are you OK?’ he asked, gently brushing the hair from her face but making no move to get off her.
She nodded and before she could say anything else he kissed her. This time she was prepared for it, she had seen the softness and the intention in his eyes as he looked at her. The taste of him was exquisite, his lips were soft and his wonderful warm scent was a heady mix. She ran her hands round the back of his neck, fingering his curls, but before she had a chance to relax into it, there was a polite cough from nearby and they quickly pulled apart.
One of the instructors was peering over the bank, smirking at them with amusement.
‘Sorry to interrupt but we’re closing up now and although I’m sure you’d like to be locked in here all night, it can get quite cold after a while.’
George quickly scrabbled up and held out a hand to pull her up too.
‘Shall we go home?’
Libby nodded as they walked towards the door, still feeling the taste of him on her lips. There really was no way back from this now.
O
n the way
back from the ski centre George drove through the town of White Cliff Bay. It was late, snow was falling and the streets were almost deserted.
Libby was silent next to him; she hadn’t said a word since the kiss, leaving him wondering if he should have done it. She had kissed him back though, there was no doubt about that and she had seemed to be enjoying it as much as he was. It was too much though – the lines of their friendship were blurring so much it was hard to see what was for practice and what was real any more.
‘Look!’ Libby shouted, snapping him out of his reverie.
On the side of the road a man was loading two live reindeer into the back of a horse trailer. There was a large sleigh on wheels nearby.
‘Oh yes, I heard there was someone in town doing reindeer sleigh rides,’ George said, relieved that they were speaking again but annoyed slightly that she had spotted it – it had ruined the surprise slightly for what he had planned for the next few days.
Libby turned to him accusingly. ‘And you didn’t think to mention it?’
He laughed. ‘I think it’s for children. But if you want that could be one of our dates.’
‘I’d love that.’
They drove down the hill towards their home, lapsing into an uneasy silence again. They parked up and walked back into the block of flats.
‘Want to come and watch a movie?’ George asked, hoping to get things back onto normal ground again.
Libby yawned and it was very obvious it wasn’t genuine. ‘I’m actually really tired, so I’ll catch you tomorrow.’
She waved at him and disappeared into her flat, leaving George feeling hurt and confused. He had kissed her and now she was pushing him away.
S
eb slowly disentangled
himself from Amy’s arms and got dressed. He had persuaded her to call in sick again today, so where she would normally be up and out by now, she was still sleeping in his bed and he liked it a lot. Holding her whilst she slept, waking up to her, the thought of coming back from his walk with Jack and making love to her again, he could get used to this.
He sat down and watched her.
Fear still circled at the edges of his heart but when he was with her it all just went away. At the moment only a handful of people knew about their relationship and by keeping it secret it was almost like he was keeping it safe. By not admitting how much he loved and cared about her, it meant that she couldn’t be taken from him. He rubbed his face, sighing with defeat. Losing Marie had messed him up spectacularly.
Could he ever truly embrace a future with her or would he always be looking over his shoulder for the grim reaper?
Suddenly his mobile phone rang on the drawers next to the bed. He moved to grab it before it woke Amy up but it was too late, her eyes snapped open at the shock.
He looked at the caller ID and saw it was his sister. Panic raced through him – why would she be ringing so early? Amy wasn’t the only one who had to live with his fears, his family bore the brunt of it too.
He answered it and heard a soft giggle on the other end which was instantly recognisable and immediately melted his fears as he remembered what day it was.
‘Uncle Seb, it’s me,’ came the sweet voice of his niece, Angel.
He sat down on the bed, next to Amy, leaning against the headboard. ‘Hey Angel, Happy Birthday.’
Amy stretched, grabbed her own phone and sat next to him as she quickly read an email.
‘Thank you for my present,’ Angel said. ‘I love it.’
‘Oh, I’m so glad you like it.’
Amy was smiling at something in the email; it was obviously good news.
‘It blows snowflakes from my wrist just like Elsa. And with the crown I feel like a real princess.’
‘You are, Princess Angel, I shall bow and curtsey to you when I see you.’
Angel let out a squeal of giggles. ‘I might turn you into a snowman if you don’t.’
‘You will? Now that’s no way to treat your favourite uncle.’
‘Are you coming to my party today? We have jelly and ice cream and chocolate cake with bits on the top.’
‘I do love jelly and ice cream, I wouldn’t miss it for the world.’
‘Will you play Pass the Parcel with us?’
He smiled. ‘Of course.’
He was aware that Amy was now looking at him with a big grin on her face.
‘I love you, Uncle Seb, I’ll see you later.’
‘Love you too, Angel.’
He hung up and looked at Amy who was smiling hugely.
‘What?’
‘Was that your niece?’
‘Yes. Angel.’
‘Angel is such a pretty name, is it because she was born at Christmas?’
‘I think it was more that she came along when they had all but given up hope of having children. My sister, Rebecca, had five miscarriages before she fell pregnant with Angel. I don’t know where she found the courage from to keep trying when every time would end in heartbreak.’
‘Because if you want something more than you want to breathe, you keep trying regardless of your fears or the consequences.’
He stared at her, knowing that she was right. Some things were worth fighting for.
‘What was in your email that made you smile so much?’
‘You know I do this Cancer Awareness work? Well, on Wednesday I was dressed as a penis to bring awareness of testicular cancer and the importance of having regular checks. I had to hug all these men and hand out leaflets.’
He smirked at the thought of it.
‘When I was chasing this one man, I tripped up and ended up flooring him, then my hair got caught in his belt and he couldn’t get away. He was so embarrassed by being molested by this giant penis. Anyway he went home and told his wife and she said if that wasn’t a sign that he should get checked out, she didn’t know what was. She’s a doctor at St Mary’s, the private hospital on the far side of Port Cardinal, and she got him checked out that afternoon. He was mortified, being checked out by the girl who had been bridesmaid at his wedding. His wife made him go through all these tests and even her friend thought it was a bit extreme, but they actually found micro traces of cancer, very small, just a few cells. He was gutted, but because they’ve caught it so early, a simple operation will probably eradicate it. He’s going to talk through his options with the doctor, but they’re confident that it’s treatable. He emailed Mia to say thanks which she passed on to me. If it hadn’t been for me it might have gone unnoticed and untreated for years. I actually made a difference; it’s such an amazing feeling.’
Seb looked at her, her eyes bright with excitement, and his heart swelled with love for her. He leaned forward, cupping her face in his hand and kissed her softly. ‘You do make a difference, not just in your cancer work, but to your friends and to me. You’re healing me, making me stronger.’