Sometimes, Forever (Sometimes Moments #2) (14 page)

It had taken almost three weeks for her to be comfortable with his nickname. It was rare for her to say, but he loved the sound of it.

“All right,” he said and then took her hand. There was no hesitation. Not like when they had first started dating. It felt natural and right when her hand was encased in his. “I’ll start. What is your favourite day of the year so far?”

“That is very specific,” Peyton said. Then she stopped and wiggled her right foot in her shoe.

“You okay?” he asked, laughing at her scrunched-up face.

“It’s these heels,” she complained. “They’ve been killing me all day.”

This he could fix.

Cooper spun around, his back facing her. Then he crouched down. “So your favourite day?”

“What are you doing?”

He rolled his eyes, knowing that she couldn’t see him. “Gonna get you off your feet so we can walk you home.”

“Cooper, it’s a long walk.”

He peeked over his shoulders to see her brow raised at him. “Peyton, don’t argue with your
boyfriend
when he’s trying to help you avoid getting blisters on your feet.”

She let out a bothered sigh, conceding defeat. She slipped off each heel, held them both in one hand, and then she carefully climbed onto his back. As she crossed her arms around his neck, Cooper had held on to her legs before he stood up, carrying his girlfriend properly.

“Today,” she whispered in his ear. “Today, right now, has been one of my favourite days of the year. But the day I met you has so far been my favourite. What’s yours?”

Cooper smiled. Her favourite day was his, too. He made his way around the hotel, towards the path that would lead them down to the lake. “My favourite day was when I met you,” he revealed. “Probably one of my favourite days of my entire life.”

Peyton rested her head on the curve of her neck as he carried her home. She let out a contented sigh as he walked around the lake.

“Coop,” she said once he had made it to her street.

“Yeah?”

Her arms tightened around him. “Would you like to stay over tonight?”

His heart throbbed in his chest. It bordered on that fine line between pain and pleasure. He wasn’t sure if she meant her couch or bed, but all he wanted to do was hold her as she slept. Discover and familiarise himself with that last deep exhale before she succumbed to sleep.

“Can I set you down for a second?”

She nodded against his neck.

Cooper bent his knees and Peyton climbed off his back. He turned around to find her putting her shoes on. When she had them on, she gave him a smile and took a deep breath.

“So?” she asked, nervous.

He remained quiet, trying to find the doubt in her eyes. It was hard with it being dark on her street.

“Cooper, your silence scares me,” she admitted.

“Sorry, I’m just trying to figure out if it’s something you want. Me to stay the night. I know we said we’d take it slow and everything …”

Peyton stepped forward and looped her arms around his neck once more. “You piggybacked me from the hotel to my street. You have lunch with me every day. You call me each morning and each night. You ask me silly questions about my favourite moments and things that aren’t really silly. You remind me of how strong I can be. You’re my Uncle John’s favourite person in town. You’re my Aunty Brenda’s favourite listener. And you’re someone my best friends love. You tell me I’m beautiful before you hang up each night. And for once, I don’t want to hear it over the phone. I’d like you to say it before I fall asleep.”

God, do I love her.

“Then I’ll say it to you before you fall asleep.”

It had taken them several minutes to walk hand in hand to her house, up the small stairs, and to her front door. Cooper waited patiently as she opened the clutch that had hung on her shoulder and retrieved her key. Once the door was opened, she took his hand and led him inside. When he closed the door behind them, Peyton flicked the hallway light switch on, went to the table, and set her bag on it. Then she spun around and gave him a sight he loved. It was that gleam in her eyes. He was sure she loved him. Peyton might not realise it, but he was sure she did. So he’d wait. Be patient with her. He’d never rush her on her affections. It had been a slow progress, but she was getting comfortable around him. And that was all he wanted.

He’d been in Peyton’s house several times, but they had never spent long periods of time inside. He’d never seen her bedroom or bathroom, but it hadn’t bothered him. Most of the time they spent together was either at his cottage or at the hotel. Tonight, however, she’d be in his arms.

Peyton took several steps towards him and said nothing as she grabbed his hand and led him down the hall. They had passed the lounge room and kitchen before they entered another small hallway. When they reached a closed door, she slowly let out a breath of air and then twisted the knob. As the bedroom door opened, Peyton stepped inside, leading him to follow.

She had dropped his hand once inside and shut the door. Then she went to her bedside table and turned on the lamp. It was on a dim setting. Not too bright but with enough light for him to take in her and her room. Cooper watched as Peyton made her way to him and rested her palms on his chest.

Just as he opened his mouth to say something, her fingers brushed his chest to the top button of his dark purple dress shirt. They had somewhat colour coordinated their outfits for the wedding by accident. He decided that he’d let her lead. Peyton unbuttoned his shirt and then pushed it off his shoulders. Once she had dropped it on the floor, she took a step back. Her arms reached behind her and that was when he acted.

He quickly had his hands on her arms, stopping her. “Peyton, what are you doing?”

She flinched underneath his touch. Her wide eyes collided with his. Cooper saw the want and desire flicker in them. He knew what she wanted. He wanted it, too. But he wasn’t sure if giving her what she wanted stuck to the slow plan they had when it came to their relationship.

“If I said I wanted to be intimate with you, would you let me?”

“Peyton,” he breathed, his thumbs brushing her arms. “We’ve been together a month.”

The disappointment swept her face. “So you don’t want to?”

“I didn’t say that.” He dropped his hands from her, signalling that he’d do whatever it was she wanted.

Then he heard her dress unzip and Cooper swallowed hard. Her purple floral dress had loosened at the bust before she pulled her arms free and then shimmied out of it, letting the clothing fall to her ankles. His girlfriend, the woman he loved, stood before him in a lavender coloured lace bra and panty set.

She was stunning.

She was breathtaking.

It was as if the air in his lungs had thinned at the sight of her. Peyton was beautiful. That nervous gleam in her eyes had him reaching for her shoulder and pulling her into his kiss. Her fingers were in his hair, deepening their contact.

This kiss of theirs felt stronger than before.

Maybe it was because they were at their most vulnerable state.

Whatever it was, this kiss had become one of his favourite moments of his life.

“Cooper,” she muttered against his mouth.

He pulled back to see her panting. Then Peyton brushed his hair back and gave him a small smile.

“I haven’t been with anyone in a long time.” She paused, biting her lip nervously. “What I’m saying is that I’ve only been with one man in my life, and I don’t know how I … I don’t …”

“Hey,” he said as he wound his arms around her lower back. “We’ll take this slow, okay?”

She nodded. “Okay, slow.”

“Do you trust me, Peyton?”

“I do,” she answered, taking what was left of his heart as hers.

The bright and warm sunlight hitting his face had Cooper groaning. He didn’t have to know how early it was because he felt it. Deciding to keep his eyes closed for a minute longer, he allowed himself one moment alone to remember. To allow the memories of his and Peyton’s lovemaking to flash behind closed eyelids. Twice they had made love. Eyes never leaving each other.

Each moan.

Each sigh of his name.

Her fingers pressing into his flesh.

Her heavy breaths.

And finally, her coming apart.

It was slow. Fingers and lips had explored before they made love. It was a night of firsts for him. He’d never experienced such passion and love before. If he wasn’t sure he was in love with Peyton Spencer before, he was now. He had whispered, ‘God, you’re beautiful, Peyton,’ before he had fallen asleep with her in her arms. She hadn’t said anything. Instead, she had exhaled and fallen asleep. Cooper had followed moments later.

For a second, he swore he heard the sounds of a sniff.

He thought nothing of it as his left hand sought out Peyton’s soft and toned body. His palm came across nothing but the cool mattress and it jolted him up. He looked down at where she was supposed to lay and found her spot empty. Cooper glanced at the door to find it shut. He was about to jump out of bed when he found Peyton dressed in a cream nightdress with her head against her knees, and arms wrapped around her legs, in the corner of the room.

Then there was a soft cry from her; he instantly pulled the covers off and got out of her bed.

Shit.

Oh, shit.

Cooper had retrieved his boxer briefs from the floor and quickly slipped them on before he rushed to her. He bent down, his heart inflamed and his breathing laboured.

“Peyton,” he said cautiously, terrified of what was about to happen.

She let out a small cry and a sniff.

“You need to leave, Cooper,” she said almost inaudible.

Words that caused the immediate crack of his heart.

“What?”

She lifted her head, and he saw it.

Regret.

Regret and guilt filled her glassy light blue eyes. He saw the torment, and it broke his heart. He hated her tears. Hated that he was the reason for them. Her lip quivered as she untangled her arms and got up. He mirrored her actions, standing up as well. She wiped her tears away as he shook his head in disbelief.

“Peyton, why are you crying?”

“Please go. You have to leave,” she said, her eyelids fluttered as if she were attempting not to cry.

Cooper reached for her hands, but she pulled away and pressed her back to the wall.

“Are you breaking up with me?” he asked in a strained voice.

That had her eyes meeting him. “Yes,” she cried.

“
What?
” he blurted out. He had heard the despair in his own ears.

“No,” she quickly said and then another sob escaped her. “I don’t know.”

Guilt was the worst kind of monster. But seeing it consume his girlfriend was the worst kind of torture.

“Peyton—”

She shook her head as tears ran down her face. “Please,” she begged. “Please, just go.”

“No, I’m not—”

“I don’t want you to stay. I need you to leave, Cooper … I need you to leave me alone.”

He winced, struggling to filter air into his lungs. She was ending them. He’d had the best sex of his life, and she was ending them. The love he thought he had seen as they made love was now shame. Bright and crystal clear.

She was ashamed they had been intimate.

To know that his girlfriend felt the way she did was a bitter pill to swallow. Cooper took a shaky step back, staring at her. Then he nodded. He said nothing as he spun around and headed to his discarded clothes. He dressed quickly, hoping Peyton would change her mind, but she remained quiet.

Once he had buttoned his shirt, Cooper slowly went to the door. He had hoped she’d speak up; he even waited once he had palmed the doorknob. He had looked at her teary eyes, and she had said nothing.

She wasn’t going to stop him.

And that had broken his heart even more.

Clenching his eyes shut, he twisted the knob and opened the door. Then he took a step into the hallway, and with his ache doubling in his empty chest, he closed the door.

He had heard her sob as he began to walk away and leave his heart where she had ripped it out.

On her bedroom floor, where she had felt shame within those four walls.

She had cried, and I hated myself for making the woman I love cry.