Somewhere Between Water and Sky (Shattered Things #2) (9 page)

We eat in silence for a few minutes, each enjoying the sound of the waves and listening to the small conversations around us. A couple a few tables down begins to argue and we share gleeful moments of eavesdropping on their disagreement.

“
Babe. You
told
me I could go with the guys tomorrow to see the game. I have the text to prove it.
”
He rummages in his pocket for his phone and his girlfriend sighs heavily.

“
Just
whatever.
I can
’
t even deal with you right now. Take me home?
”

Ren whispers under his breath.
“
Just run, brother. Just run.
”

Jessa rolls her eyes.
“
Whatever. She
’
s the reason all guys assume girls are needy attention whores.
”
She licks her fingers and scoots out of her booth, grabbing Ren
’
s arm with her other hand.

“
Come on. Let
’
s go check the jukebox. It
’
s too quiet in here.
”
They push and shove and slap the whole way to the machine, trying to beat the other for first dibs in song selection. I glance down at my pizza and catch more of the argument from the couple, now gathering their things to leave.

I curl my lip and chance turning around to catch a good look at them as they pass by our table. My breath catches. For a split second I think it
’
s Kevin. Same hair
—
same build
—
same gait. He turns around and catches me staring and smiles.

No. Not Kevin. Get a grip, Stephanie.

I offer him a friendly smile and look down at my plate again, slightly embarrassed he caught me.

“
Jessa. I
’
m not spending a dollar to listen to Beyonce.
”

I stifle a laugh and turn toward Jessa and Ren.

She points at the machine.
“
You won
’
t spend a dollar for Drunk in Love but you
’
ll waste
two
dollars on Taylor Swift?!
”

“
Don
’
t judge my musical taste, Jess. Besides. It
’
s not just any Taylor Swift.
”
He grins.
“
It
’
s our song.
”

“
Damn straight it
’
s our song. I knew you were trouble first.
”

He rolls his eyes. She flips her hair and reaches to lean her elbow on his non-tattooed shoulder, pressing into him while they flip through the offered songs.
“
Whatever you want, Renfro. I chose last time.
”

I tilt my head and try to figure them out. Ever since last night they
’
ve been glued together in a way I
’
ve never seen before. I watch as Ren presses a bunch of buttons and they high five each other as London Grammar fills the speakers around us. They turn to walk back toward the table and I smile in approval.

“
London Grammar. Nice. I was concerned for a second.
”

Ren shakes his head.

“
One of these days the world will understand the poetry of Taylor Swift.
”

I balk.
“
Nope. Never. Ren,
never
will the world understand her lyrics.
”

Jessa laughs and begins moving her hips in a sultry twist. I have no idea how she
’
s moving her hips
and
walking
and
not falling on her ass. She sits down next to me and bumps my elbow.

I turn toward her, leaning against the back of the booth. I motion between her and Ren.

“
Are you guys dating or what?
”

Jessa
’
s stops mid-bite.
“
Huh. Totally not expecting that question.
”

“
Why?
”

“
Because,
”
she flips her hand toward me and crinkles her nose.
“
You
’
re the one with issues about every body knowing your business and shit. Didn
’
t think you
’
d turn the tables so quickly.
”

I smile.

“
I aim to surprise.
”

Ren swallows his piece of pizza in three bites and juts his chin toward me.

“
Why do you want to know? You forming a crush, new girl?
”
He winks.

I roll my eyes.

“
Hardly.
”

Jessa fights from spitting out her coke.

“
I ask because the tension between you two is making
me
all hot and bothered and I just needed to clear the air before we go any further.
”

Jessa turns and focuses on Ren and raises her eyebrow.
“
Well, Renfro? Are we a thing?
”

His eyes grow wide.

“
Uh
…
.
”

Jessa throws her head back and laughs. She leans in and faces me.
“
Ren and I have a mutual-attraction agreement. He likes me. I like him. We both know it. But, we don
’
t want a relationship.
”
She shrugs.

“
That sounds healthy.
”

She smirks.
“
Well, we
’
ve been down that road before
—
it didn
’
t really work.
”
She glances at Ren and his eyes have gone glassy, a sure sign he
’
s wanting to evade the conversation. Realizing he
’
s not going to chime in, she turns and looks at me again.

“
What about you, Dr. Phil? You have any boy-toys back home?
”

I clear my throat.
“
It
’
s complicated. And no I don
’
t want to talk about it.
”
I take a sip of my coke.

Ren chuckles, now fully engaged.
“
Stop trying to be so mysterious. It
’
s exhausting.
”

“
Stop trying to pretend you don
’
t want to be with Jessa.
”
I jerk my thumb toward her chest and she blushes.
“
Everyone can see your hard-on from a mile away.
”

They stare at me gape-mouthed for a few seconds until I finally roll my eyes.
“
It
’
s not like I just said something earth shattering. Like I said:
a mile away.
For both of you. Jesus. I don
’
t understand the whole we-like-each-other-but-are-giving-the-other-one-space shit. Seems asking for trouble.
”
Wiping my mouth with a napkin, I bring it down and start picking it to pieces.

Reminds me of that time in the diner with Kevin
…
.

Shit.

Memories are dangerous. With memories come voices. I sniff and throw the shredded napkin on the leftover crusts on my plate and check to see if their plates are empty.

I gotta get out of here.

“
So uh
…
.can we do Sunset Cliffs now?
”
I point toward the sky through the window in the front of the store.
“
Looks like we only have a little over an hour of daylight left.
”

“
Oh! Right. Sunset.
”
Ren pats his jeans for his keys and begins to look worried before I push them forward on the table. Jessa combs through her hair and hazards a glance toward Ren before glancing at me and offering a small smile.

She leans forward as I maneuver myself out of the booth and tweaks my elbow with her fingers. Turning around to face her, her small smile stretches across her face into the grin of one who has a master plan.

“
I like when you get feisty, Stephanie. You know, I feel like this is the beginning of what could be a beautiful and adventurous friendship.
”
She licks her lips and jerks her head toward Ren.
“
I haven
’
t seen him that flustered since I showed up to work licking a multi-colored lollipop.

I snort.

“
You
’
re evil, you know that, Jessa? Poor guy doesn
’
t even have a chance.
”

She cackles.

“
I know. It
’
s glorious.
”

Chapter Five

We pull up to Sunset Cliffs and there
’
s not a soul in sight. Jessa takes the rubber band around her wrist and lifts and twists her hair into a high bun to fight the wind.

“
I can
’
t believe there
’
s no one here.
”

I can
’
t either. I breathe in deep
—
smelling the ocean and feeling the wind blow my hair loose of its braid. I don
’
t even care. I walk to the edge of the cliff and hold my hands to my chest as if to keep the ache inside.

Sometimes beauty hurts you with her power.

The waves are rushing up to the cliff and crashing against the rock, spraying salt water up above. My flesh erupts in goosebumps and I shiver. I don
’
t know if I believe in holy spaces. But here? I gaze out to the almost imperceptible line where water meets sky.

Here, everything seems sacred.

A wave crashes beneath me and the foam sprays up and over the ledge, baptizing my feet. I breathe in quick and blink away the tears. It
’
s almost too much. I hesitate, wondering if I should just walk away. Maybe I
’
m making too much of things.

But the waves seem to take on a different chorus, beckoning me closer and closer to the edge.

I find a spot that
’
s dry and sit down, curling my legs into my chest and resting my chin on my knees.

The sky is screaming too, but this time I
’
m not sure I want to hear.

She
’
s begging me to remember mornings spent watching her grab hold of the blackness and edging it out for another day.

Begging me to hold on
—
to believe
—
to rest in second chances.

Because there
’
s always another day coming, right?

But there
’
s also the ending
—
the way the colors give in to the darkness and disappear for a moment.

Which one of those is truth?

I sit and listen to the chorus above and below me, wondering if just maybe, that
’
s where my hope is: somewhere in the middle between water and sky.

Speaking of hope.

I bite my lip and close my eyes against Jessa and Ren
’
s giggles behind me. Their happiness reminds me of piggybacks under the night sky and falling stars and running from trains and kissing to beat the storm. A tear trickles down my face and I bury my head in between my legs before raising it again to watch the sun dip below the horizon, the waves gaining intensity and rush as the tide moves inland.