Soul Dancing with the Brass Band (The Brass Band Series) (19 page)

“Buddha...A name everyone has heard, but most know nothing about.”

“Buddha, one of the Christs of the East, was born south of Nepal six thousand years before Jesus Christ and was destined by birthright to become King. He was known as Siddhartha Gautama and at his birth, Asita, the wisest of the seers told his mother that he would become a
Buddha
...one who has supreme knowledge. Unfortunately his mother didn’t live to see the story to fruition, for she died seven days later leaving Siddhartha to be raised by his sister.”

“His
father, King Suddhodanna, in an effort to protect his son from anything unpleasant, built him a palace for each season where Siddhartha lived a lavish life style. At sixteen his father arranged his marriage and another prince was born.”

“Even though Siddhartha’s every need was more than met in his young life, he became curious about what lay beyond the palace walls. On the night of his twenty-ninth birthday Siddhartha secretly left under the cover of darkness, giving up his royal life. He shaved his head and sent back his princely garments, becoming completely homeless.”

“He enlightened while meditating under the Bodhi tree when he was thirty-five, revealing the hidden mysteries of the human mind. In this transcendental state of consciousness, as a
completely realized
being, he became the salvation of the suffering.”

Roaming the front edge of the stage, Dr. Edwards thought out loud, “How many of us would give up great wealth and a lavish lifestyle for any reason? After all, isn’t that the
American Dream
?”

“Some of you might have been exposed to the basic eastern spiritual precept that divinity lies inside each of us.
Namaste
, a common greeting in many parts to this world, literally translated means ‘the
God
in me recognizes the
God
in you’. So as
Westerners
, largely raised without a point of reference to the concept of internal divinity, what do we do? How do we begin to make the connection with that all-knowing
Buddha
within each of us? Well,” he said with a big smile, “this afternoon we’re going to figure it out together.”

He gave us a minute to settle in and then continued.

“Let’s be honest with each other. Nothing of any consequence in life usually comes without intense focus, commitment and a dedication to a path of action. It takes time to break patterns and learn new fundamental
truths
, but I guarantee every step on the journey of self-discovery will be well worth your effort. The place we are going to begin today is with Buddha’s own statement. “
We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves
.”

“So, if this is true, the first thing you have to do is clean up your apartment.” The auditorium laughed. “I’m serious!” he said laughing along with the student body. “You have to take out the garbage...literally and figuratively. You have to clean up your relationships. You have to clean up your intensions and what follows is the commitment I spoke of. You must take control of your thoughts and dust off your dreams.”

Dr. Edwards dominated the auditorium as he paced slowly from one side of the stage to the other, all 6’4” of him.

“You laugh, but I’m dead serious, so please… see if you can follow this train of thought. We’re taught as children that God, the
ultimate power
, floats above us in heaven, but I want to again suggest that the
ultimate power
lies within. You are the sole creator of your existence. You are the one who decides which direction your life takes by each thought that you have.”

His voice softened as if he was having a personal conversation with each one of us. “I know this can be difficult, but it is imperative that you hear it. At this moment, most of you let random thoughts run your life, not actually caring one way or another how ugly or disturbing your thoughts might be. After all, you’re not voicing the worst of them out loud. You think no one hears them, but you need to recognize that these thoughts
are
being heard. Your subconscious mind hears all of it and then sets forth to bring your thoughts to fruition; to manifest them into the physical world.”

“You have good luck and bad luck and sometimes things just happen...right? Wrong! You create
today
by what you thought yesterday and the previous day before that and the day before that. If you want to know what you were thinking last year at this time, look at what you have in your life today! You have to refocus your response to all that comes your way so that the universal law of cause and effect will, a month from now, a year from now, result in your life looking like you made a conscious decision to
create
it rather than to become a
victim
of it.

“Take a minute to reflect on what your mind is manifesting for you and decide if learning to be the master of your thoughts is worth the return,” Dr. Edwards said standing with his arms crossed and his feet shoulder width apart. He scanned the audience and it felt like he was looking at each of us.

Gilbert elbowed me in the ribs, “Told you so.”

“I’m starting to get the idea, Gilbert. It’s coming at me from so many directions I feel I’m being beaten over the head with it,” I whispered.

“Well Hils, time to wake-up.” Everyone in our area shushed us as Dr. Edwards resumed his talk.

“I know this is a lot to absorb, especially if you have never considered any of these ideas before. Sometimes it's easier to let your life run amuck, unchecked, but I think in the long run it’s much easier to just create what you want your life to be.”

“Don’t kid yourself. Your mind is the most powerful computer ever created. It generates what you see, what you hear, what you feel by its interpretation of the situation. It determines what you’re afraid of, the challenges you will face in life and ultimately your health and well-being. Your mind and your thoughts even determine who you will meet in the future and whether your spouse will be loving and supportive, or a dreadful…ah… problem.”

The auditorium erupted in laughter as Dr. Edwards rolled his eyes, while raising his hands to quiet the audience.

“Now, imagine for a moment a person who walks through life saying things such as, ‘it just makes me sick, I hate my life, I’m so stupid, I’ll never get this done in time, my homework is too difficult, I’ll never get the job, it really doesn’t matter anyway’ and the worst thing of all... ‘I’m not good enough.’ What do you think those thoughts are instructing the subconscious mind to do? If your subconscious is creating, without question what you ask it to, I’d say this person is not far from creating crisis after crisis in their life. Hypochondriacs create what they are looking for - illness. The one who says, ‘I can’t find my car keys,’ won’t find them, the same way a person looking for new opportunities will find them everywhere. It’s up to you. You can live your life by
default
or you can live it by
design
.”

Looking around, I saw that Dr. Edwards had the audience in the palm of his hand.

“Buddha tells us, “If a man can control his mind, he can find the way to Enlightenment, and all wisdom and virtue will naturally come to him.”

“There is a thread of consciousness in the universe that links everything together and if you choose this path, you will become aware of the connection of everything and everyone because in truth...we are One. We are One with nature, with One another and we are One with the
Universal Power
, the
I AM
, and One with
God
. Becoming aware of this thread of consciousness is ours to discover.”

“Unfortunately, at this lower level of consciousness,” he said opening his arms to indicate the physical world we live in, “where we spend most of our time, we are totally unaware of the unlimited beings we really are.”

Dr. Edwards stopped to take a drink of water. It was so quiet you could hear a pin drop. He sucked in air loudly and began to talk again.

“If you begin to grasp the idea of working with your subconscious mind, your life will take a quantum leap forward. It takes unwavering faith in self and amazing passion to take the journey to self-awareness. Now you have to ask yourself. ‘Do I want to take the red pill or the blue pill?
’ One will take you back to where you began; the other will show you just how deep the rabbit hole goes’.” The audience burst into applause with the reference to
The Matrix
.

“To embark on this path takes trust and courage. I have a friend who was terrified that there would be no one at the end. I promise you, there will be someone there and it will be
you
, a stronger, more loving and compassionate
you
.”

“Each of you will find your own unique journey, sometimes traveling with others, other times remaining solitary. I was led to a Guru, a teacher. He schooled me in transcendent meditation, but you must find what works for you. You can use yoga, prayer, long walks in nature, Tai Chi, Chi Gong
; the list of techniques that will advance you are endless. Even digging a ditch will work if you use it as a
practice
for higher consciousness.”

“I suggest doing some research. Find a teacher that can help you get started, but never believe that your first teacher is going to be your last. Also, be wary of teachers who believe they are ‘
all knowing’, because few humans are. Each teacher is a step on your path and if you are growing, you will find the next teacher. Your journey will take a lifetime...or more,” he slipped in under his breath, “but ultimately you will arrive and realize who you really are.”

“I’ve traveled around the world and it is apparent that there have been many
Christs that have walked this planet and there are those who walk among us today. I study with one such Being, one who does not get wet while walking in the rain. He is love and beauty and exists consciously in dimensions far beyond the one we spend our time in. You will find these magnificent beings when it is your time, when you are ready for them and are at a level that enables you to understand their teachings. You cannot hurry your journey. Just know that when you are ready, the masters will appear. Work on making yourself ready for the mystical adventures that are out there waiting for you.”

“This path will lead you to the necessity for self forgiveness. Nurturing self-love within us is mandatory. We all must get to the place where we can move forward in life without the weight of self-loathing and guilt. The
Universal Power
already sees each of us as perfect. You’re the one holding grudges against yourself for what you’ve done or not done. GIVE IT UP!” Dr. Edwards shouted so loudly it startled me. “Offer yourself forgiveness because at the end of your journey it will become obvious that there is no blame.”

“Let me leave you with a quote from my Master who doesn’t get wet in the rain.” Dr. Edwards pulled a folded piece of paper from his jacket pocket, slowly unfolded it, laid it on the podium and began to read,

There was a gift that was given at the beginning of all time. It is called life. You experience life by how you are known by others and by those you love. But it is understood within your spirit’s existence that you are much more. You are the existence of the Divine One whose purpose is to bring God to this planet
.

He folded the paper and placed it back into his pocket.

“The
thing
you must realize is that the second coming of Christ you have been waiting for has already happened. The second coming of Christ is YOU. It’s always been YOU… This is the beginning of the Twilight of the Kali Yuga, the Age of Aquarius, the time of Enlightenment; the Mayan Calendar ends in 2012. The time is drawing near for all of you to awaken…. WAKE UP! It is your time to shine with a light so brilliant that it can be seen from the heavens. Start your path today. Watch your thoughts. Forgive yourself and grow. I beseech you, the time is now, don’t miss your opportunity. The world needs you. YOU ARE THE ONE WE HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR!”

The audience was totally quiet as Dr. Edwards turned to walk off the stage.

Then I heard Gilbert start to slowly clap. I followed suit, and then more and more people began to join in, until there was uproar of joy in the room. We had just been given a great gift and it felt wonderful.

NOV 17, 36 A.D
.

“
Come with me, dear one
,”
McCollum says
. “
I have something I’d like to show you
.”

It’s very cold, so I wrap myself against the wind and mount my mare. We ride for hours before we reach our destination and when we do, it’s nothing but the remnants of a once thriving town. McCollum dismounts and looking up at me asks
, “
What do you see
?”

I scan the area slowly and begin to speak
. “
The fields are barren, as if the crops failed. The people stayed as long as possible because they had built their lives here. Eventually with nothing to eat, they had to move on and now their homes sit before us in decay
,”
I explain from a knowing within me
. “
I feel the sorrow of the people who once occupied this village deep in my bones
.”

“
Come child. Let’s build a fire and I will tell you a story
.”
McCollum leads our horses into the remains of an old barn and begins gathering kindling. When the fire is lit, we both sit close to warm our hands
.

Looking into my eyes, McCollum admits that I am correct in what I saw. It makes me wonder why we had to ride so far on such a bleak day. Placing more wood on the fire, he settles in
.

“
Let me tell you the story of the downfall of this settlement, so you will better understand. About ten years ago, a man walked into this thriving village and was welcomed as an additional set of hands to work the land. He was strong and as he helped plant the crops he also began to plant other seeds in the minds of the villagers. He talked of drought, famine, crop failure and starvation, and one by one these worries grew and festered in the farmers’ minds. Negativity slowly sucked the dreams of the future from their naive souls. Pride once held in the appearance of their homes soon faded because they were distracted by fear. And as the fear grew within them it became a self-fulfilling prophecy. Their crops failed because the darkness of their vision caused them to make devastating decisions. Before long, brother argued with brother and neighbors began to doubt each other’s loyalty. You see, Hilsbeth, what happened here is just the reverse of what you saw. The downfall of this town began with the planting of a thought and when it took hold there was no one in the village that was powerful enough to stop its manifestation
.”

“
What happened to the stranger
?”
I ask, afraid of the answer
.

“
There will always be darkness in our world that preys on the ignorance of mankind. It creates bigotry and hatred, infests the world with fear and drains the life force from individuals who don’t have the vision to see through it. I brought you here today, so you’ll realize how important it is to hold the light for the ones who are lost. We must never be seduced by the darkness, dear Hilsbeth, but learn to recognize it by the feeling it creates and the destruction left in its wake. We must always instill hope and stand on the side of love, peace, thoughtfulness… and hold a positive vision, because in time... I pray light will prevail
.”

Nov 17, 2010

I heard Ruth’s key in the front door and watched her drop her purse and computer on the couch. “Hard day?” I asked, seeing her exhaustion.

“I think I just haven’t been getting enough sleep lately. I’m going to make a cup of tea, take a long hot bath and hit the sack,” she said as she headed for the kitchen.

I hear her mumble, “What the hell!” and I remembered the flowers I left in the sink. She came back into the living room holding the scrap of paper.

“Who’s Jackson Black?”

“
He’s that guy I pointed out at The Commons the other day… scruffy guy… older.”

“Yeah, I remember, but what’s with the flowers?” she asked.

“He was outside the coffee shop, he knew my name and now he obviously has figured out where I live.”

“Is
Creepy Guy stalking you?”

I thought hard for a minute before answering.

“It’s hard to explain. It’s like he reaches inside me and takes my joy, leaving me slimed with a dirty feeling. It’s not illegal, but it should be,” I explained.

“He sounds like my Uncle Marvin. He can suck the happiness out of a room just by walking into it. He loves talking about negative stuff. If it’s not a pandemic or forecasting the crash of world markets, it is the wrath of God. His family is always depressed.”

The following morning I woke to a clatter outside of my window. I pulled the blanket off my bed and wrapped it tight around me. It had snowed overnight and our heat was set at 55 degrees. In fact, this morning our apartment was damn cold. I needed to have a talk with Ruth about setting the temperature at 65 now that winter was here.

I walked over to the window and pulled the curtain back, so I could see what the noise was all about. There was a moving truck parked at the curb with no less than ten boys excitedly moving boxes into the downstairs apartment.

“Oh my God, it’s happening! Ruth, it is happening! Get up,” I yelled at the top of my lungs while running toward Ruth’s room.

“What’s happening?” I had obviously roused her out of a deep sleep.

“Will and George are outside. Well, I didn’t actually see them, but I’m sure they must be with everything else that is moving in downstairs,” I said, not able to hide my excitement, and now neither could Ruth.

“Which window?” Ruth asked as she pulled on her robe. “I want to see if I can spot George. Good God, it’s been weeks since they’ve actually been here.”

“Come on, it’s my bedroom window.” I shooed Ruth off my trailing blanket so it wasn’t pulled from my shoulders.

“By the way Ruth, we’ve got to set our heat higher on these cold nights,” I said as we passed the thermostat and I pushed the heat up a few notches.

“Yeah...yeah…whatever,” Ruth called, running into my bedroom. By the time I caught up with her, she had the curtains open and her face all but smashed against the window.

“Look Hillary, there they are,” she said, waving wildly at them.

“So much for playing coy.”

All self-respect was literally out the window when Ruth opened it and started asking the boys questions. She wasn’t going to be happy when she finally looked in the mirror and saw her tousled hair and her eyes, black from last night’s mascara.

“What the hell!” I said and stepped to the window to see if Will was with George. I ran my fingers through my hair, hoping I didn’t look too bad.

“How about some hot chocolate for the moving crew,” Ruth yelled and all the little faces looked up at her and then back to George.

“I think that sounds great!” George bellowed back. “Give us about an hour to finish up and bring it down to our place. We’ll give you the grand tour.”

“That doesn’t give us much time.” Ruth was now in a bit of a panic and in high drama mode. “How about if I start the hot chocolate while you shower, and then you can finish up while I clean up?”

“Sounds like a plan.” As I washed my hair, I delighted in the fact that Will was only one floor below me. I’d never been in the apartment downstairs, so I wasn’t sure where Will’s bedroom was. But no matter the location, when we both fell asleep tonight, we’d be closer to each other than ever. I figured my manifesting skills were getting better because my dreams were coming true.

It wasn’t long before Ruth was pounding on the bathroom door, “It’s my turn. Hurry your butt up.”

“I’m just about finished,” I answered, drying my hair as Ruth busted through the door, slipping past me to get into the shower.

I finished quickly and I hurried to the kitchen to see where Ruth left off. The milk was just warming and the cups were already on a tray. I started to mix in the cocoa when there was a knock at the door. Dropping the spoon on the counter, I ran to answer it.

“What’s the ruckus downstairs?” Gilbert said as he stepped through the front door, coffee in hand. “Don’t look so disappointed, Hils. You’ll give me a complex.”

“Come on in, Gilbert. I’m not disappointed. It’s always great to see you. I just thought you might be Will,” I said, walking back to the kitchen to stir the hot cocoa as Gilbert followed.

“The mystery man...what’s he doing out in the sunlight?” Gilbert joked.

“He’s not a vampire,” I said, laughing. “All of those kids downstairs are helping Will and George move in. We’re on our way down with hot chocolate. Do you want to meet him?” I asked with a smile I just couldn’t get off of my face.

“Of course I’d like to meet Will. After all, I’m like your big brother,” he stated as a matter of fact. “I need to see if he’s good enough for you.”

We’d never really voiced it before, but I felt that same level of affection
toward him and believed he was right about the big brother thing.

Ruth was a little out of breath when she emerged from her bedroom.

“I’m ready. How’s the cocoa coming? Oh hi, Gilbert,” she said looking at me with a questioning look on her face.

“Gilbert’s coming down to meet Will, it
’s big brother stuff,” I said, smiling at him and handing him a stack of napkins. “Come on and help me carry this tray. It’s all ready to go.”

It only took a couple of minutes to get organized and we were off to entertain our new neighbors. As we walked into the apartment, all of the little faces quickly gathered around us, waiting patiently for their drinks as they warmed up their hands and toes near the fireplace. I had never noticed that our house had a chimney. It was well hidden by the trees and since the lower apartment had been vacant the previous semester, we hadn’t noticed any smoke. But now my mind filled with romantic thoughts of Will and me cuddled up in front of it.

From across the room I heard George’s booming voice.

“I would like to introduce you to our good friends, Ruth Witherspoon and Hillary Rubner. They live in the apartment upstairs.”

“And I’m Gilbert, Hillary’s big brother,” Gilbert couldn’t resist adding with a grin.

“You boys can introduce yourselves as they serve you hot cocoa,” George said.

They all lined up and did exactly as they were told. I imagined this was a big day for them, being this far away from their home, with the only supervision being George and Will.

Suddenly, I felt a hand slip over mine as Will took the ladle from me and gave it to Ruth.

“I’d like to meet your big brother,” Will said as he directed me into the living room. “I was completely unaware that you had an older brother,”

“Well, it’s more figurative than literal. Gilbert is my good friend and sometimes my protector. He’s also the teaching assistant in my Physics class,” I said, looking around for Gilbert only to discover he was right beside me. “Will, this is Gilbert Dutton. Gilbert, Will Emerald.” I said, carefully watching the reactions in both of their faces.

“Very nice to meet you, Will. I’ve heard a lot about you.” Gilbert stuck out his huge round hand.

“It’s very nice to meet you, too, Gilbert. I’m happy Hillary has such a good friend to rely on,” Will said, meeting Gilbert’s hand.