Spider Bight [Deep Space Mission Corps 3] (Siren Publishing Ménage Everlasting) (6 page)

“What the fuck happened?” Aaron yelled. “You okay, Em?”

Emi belatedly realized the damn spider was, in fact, made out of rubber. As she looked around at the mess she’d made, she spotted Ford’s concerned frown…

And Caph’s playful grin. A wave of pleased humor hit her from the large man and she immediately pieced together what had happened.

“Caph, I’m gonna fucking kill your ass!”

Ford looked confused as the big man started laughing so hard he doubled over. “What happened?” Ford asked as he walked over to her and helped her to her feet. He brushed coffee grounds off her uniform.

From the doorway, Caph wheezed with laughter and shook his head.

Aaron, stepping carefully to avoid the spilled coffee grounds, picked up the spider and held it up for Ford to see. “The practical joker is back.”

Caph howled with laughter and slid down the wall.

Ford sadly surveyed the spilled coffee and shook his head. “What a waste.” As dedicated a coffee drinker as Emi, to him it was practically sacrilege for it to be wasted like that. He took the spider from Aaron. “I wondered where Bucky had gotten to. We haven’t seen him in a couple of years, have we?”

“Bucky?” Emi asked.

Aaron frowned at Caph, who still giggled by the counter. “Yeah, Bucky the rubber spider. It’s sort of Caph’s tradition. He’s been getting me and Ford with him at least once a year on average for nearly as long as we’ve been together.”

Emi snatched the spider from Ford and jammed it in one of the outer pockets of her pants. “Not funny, Caph!”

He managed to get to his feet, still occasionally snorting. “Happy Halloween, babe. It was hysterical from this end. You should see your face.”

She swatted his naked shoulder. “You think it’s so funny, you get to clean up that mess.”

Aaron yawned. “She’s got a point.” He leveled a serious gaze at Caph. “Clean it up. Now.”

“Okay, okay. I will. Let me go pull some clothes on—”

“Now, Caph,” Aaron said.

Caph sighed. “Yes, mon captain.”

Ford frowned. “Can’t believe you baited the coffeemaker. Is nothing sacred anymore? The coffeemaker should be off-limits.”

Emi found the scoop, basket, and filter where they’d landed on the floor. Then she grabbed a different canister of coffee. “And when you finish that, you get your ass out to the store and buy us five pounds of coffee to replace it. I got that over in H Dome, at Haverty’s. That’s the only place that sells dark Columbian Java roast around here.”

Caph looked at Aaron. “Aw, that’s on the other side of the complex. That’ll take me all morning. I still have to go through the weapons systems checks.”

“Then you should have thought of that sooner,” Aaron said. “I wouldn’t argue with the ship’s doctor, if I were you. Not after you fucked with her coffee. That in and of itself is dangerous.”

Ford still sadly stared at the spilled coffee scattered across the galley floor. “What a waste.” He looked up at Caph. “I love you, buddy, but if Emi and Aaron weren’t here, you’d have a shiner. You don’t fuck with a man’s coffee. It’s just not right.”

Caph rolled his eyes and headed over to the cleaning cabinet. “Fine, I get it. Coffeemaker’s off-limits.” He grabbed a broom and dustpan. “Oh, can I have Bucky back?”

The other three shouted in unison, “No!”

Emi glared at Caph. “Bucky can stay with me for the duration,” she said.

Caph looked close to pouting. If it hadn’t been for the fact that it was the coffeemaker he’d booby-trapped, she might have relented. “Aw, babe, he’s like one of the family. He’s over twenty years old. You can’t toss him into the disposal.”

That’s exactly where she’d been planning on tossing him at her first opportunity, but the sad tone in Caph’s voice softened her. “I won’t toss him, big guy. I promise. But he stays with me until I say otherwise.”

* * * *

Emi didn’t see Caph most of the day. She was too busy going through her sick bay and medical inventories, then helping Ford with his cargo inventories. She knew Caph had left the ship on the shopping run to replace their coffee, because she sensed him leave due to the chip. She wasn’t paying attention when he returned a few hours later. She just suddenly realized he was back.

Before dinner, Caph hunted her down in sick bay. He pulled her to him and kissed her, melting her and sending damp warmth to her pussy. “Am I forgiven, babe?”

“I don’t know. Did you get me and Ford our coffee?”

“Not only did I get your coffee, I got fifteen pounds of it, as well as an assortment of some new flavors they got in their shipment this week.”

She smiled and relaxed against him. “Then you’re forgiven, big guy.” Who was she kidding? She couldn’t stay mad at any of her men, and especially not her big, sweet goofball.

“Does that mean I can have Bucky back now?”

She snorted. “Nice try.
Hell
no. You’ll get him back when I say so.” She hadn’t decided the best way to get Caph back yet, but Bucky would be part of her revenge. For now, she’d keep the rubber spider close in her pants pocket.

Caph tried the pouty lip on her. “Aw, come on, babe. I said I’m sorry.”

“Yes, you did. And I forgive you.” She pecked him on the lips before slipping free. “And if you know what’s good for you, you won’t argue the point with me. I won’t get rid of him. I promise.”

* * * *

“Oh, they still have Bucky?” Delaney didn’t appear anything but amused when Emi related the story to her the next afternoon.

“Yes,” Emi grumbled.

Delaney smiled. “It’s been a tradition with them for a lot of years.” They were dining at a café not too far from the hangars. The men would join them shortly. Markkus would have joined them, too, but he’d been called in to work on an emergency.

“So I heard.” She pulled the rubber spider out of her pocket. For now, it wasn’t leaving her sight. She wouldn’t put it past Caph to steal it the first chance he got. And if she lost it, no telling where the rubber arachnid would appear next, knowing Caph.

Delaney took it from her and examined it. Black rubber legs made to look fuzzy. An exaggerated, rotund body, and beady, red eyes. It was as big as Emi’s hand and its long, wiggly legs unsettled her.

“It is an ugly thing, isn’t it?” She handed it back to Emi.

“Yes.” Emi jammed it back in her pocket when she saw the men pass the café’s windows. “I’m not letting Caph have it back before I get him.”

“What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know yet. I haven’t decided.” She looked up as the men walked over to the table. She slid around the corner booth to make room. They each leaned in and kissed Delaney on the cheek before sitting down.

“Hi, Mom,” they chanted in unison.

Delaney laughed. “I always did love that. And congratulations on winning the costume contest.”

Ford preened. “I told the guys it would win us the trophy. Finally.”

“He’s been wanting to win that damn trophy for years,” Delaney told Emi.

Ford beamed. “Now it’s proudly sitting in our quarters.”

Delaney leveled her gaze across the table at Caph. “Caph, my son, you sure love to live dangerously, don’t you?”

He blushed. “Aw, I told her I was sorry for Bucky. She won’t give him back.”

“You’ll get him back when I say so,” Emi said, “and not a second sooner.”

“You don’t sabotage someone’s coffee,” Delaney continued with a mock scowl. “You’re lucky it was Emi and not Ford who found it. I’d be visiting you in the hospital, otherwise.”

“You’ve got that right,” Ford grumbled. “Coffee is supposed to be sacrosanct. Messing with a person’s coffee is the equivalent of replacing a guy’s lube with glue. Might look funny at the time, but someone’s liable to get their ass kicked in retaliation.”

With her own tasks complete, until they were underway again, Emi had nothing to do but watch her men do their jobs. She considered her eagerness to leave Mars a good sign. That and her steady stomach. Her horrible memories of the space sickness she’d suffered during her first lift from Earth were always close at hand.

It wasn’t something she was eager to experience again.

Ever.

Aaron and the twins called system status and other readings back and forth to each other as Aaron ran down their pre-lift checklist. They still didn’t know their final destination, their orders held up at DSMC headquarters on Earth. Unless they received word to do otherwise, they would continue their normal routine and prepare to leave Mars as scheduled.

Then the com link beeped. Aaron answered. “
Tamora Bight
.”

“Captain, this is the dockmaster. We’ve just received your official downloads.”

“About time,” he muttered low enough only Emi and the twins could hear. Aaron punched in his access code. “Send them.”

“Roger.” A few moments later, they finished. “That’s it.”

“Thanks.
Tamora Bight
out.” Aaron pulled them up and displayed them on the front vid screen so Emi and the twins could easily see them.

Ford let out a low whistle. “Cool beans. Finally, we get to use this crate for what she was designed for.”

Caph grinned. “That’s a long run. Man, they’ve got us heading out to the boondocks, don’t they?”

“Well,” Ford said, “you did say you’d be happy with a nice, boring explore.”

“I’m not complaining,” Caph answered. “Nice and boring sounds like a lot of fun.” He playfully waggled his shaggy blond eyebrows at Emi. “I’m sure I’ll figure out more than a few ways to stay amused.”

Emi glanced at Aaron. While he was still in professional mode, she nevertheless felt his pleased satisfaction at the orders. “How long will this trip take?” she asked.

Aaron scrolled through their nav computer. “Two months out, four weeks there doing a secondary explore, then two months to a neighboring star system for a two-month preliminary explore. A two-week jump to the nearest military outpost for resupply and R&R, and then we’ll get new orders there.” He looked at her. “Hope you don’t need to run out to the store any time soon.”

She laughed. “No, I’m all set.” She walked over to Caph and playfully poked his shoulder. “I know we’ll have enough coffee.”

* * * *

Their scheduled lift would happen in six hours. After Emi fixed them all dinner, she tried to stay out of their way as she sat and watched them. She couldn’t help it, she loved seeing this side of them. Professional, all business. Even the twinspeak was kept to a minimum as the men followed their well-honed routine. She left the bridge to spend some of the time in a conference call with Sophie and Donna. It would be their last chance to do so for a while.

“Going to miss you,” Donna said. “It was nice getting to spend time with you.”

“Yeah,” Sophie agreed. “It was nice meeting both of you. I’m going to miss both of you.”

“You’re heading back to Earth,” Emi countered. “You’ll be too busy with training to miss anyone.”

“Oh, I talked to Graymard and warned him not to bother with the sim,” Sophie said.

Both Emi and Donna laughed. “He didn’t want to die, I take it?” Donna asked.

“Exactly. I told him I’d already talked to both of you, and that if he tried to get me into a sim, he’d better not bring me out. That, or he’d better not show his face near me when I got loose. He agreed that considering how well me and the guys get along, a sim would be ‘counterproductive,’ in his words.”

“You scared him shitless,” Donna said.

Emi giggled. “Between me and Donna cleaning his clock, you’d think he’d learn.”

“Or at least hire a bodyguard,” Donna added.

“I still want to thank both of you,” Sophie said.

“We didn’t do anything,” Emi said. “You and your guys got along. All I did was perform the chip sync.”

“No, and I don’t want this to sound wrong, but thank you for not picking the
BG
guys as your crew. I know they’re not everyone’s cuppa, but I really feel like I’ve found a home with them. I didn’t expect that.”

Emi smiled. “Well, they’re nice guys. But I have to admit Graymard knew what he was doing, having me meet them and the
K-2
guys before I met my guys. I wouldn’t have been a good fit for either of those two crews.”

Donna spoke up. “Emi, you realize Rob feels bad about how they treated you in the sim, don’t you?”

“He doesn’t need to. He apologized and all is forgiven. And besides, you’re happy, they’re happy, everything worked out the way it should.”

“Unless Caph springs another one of those rubber spiders on you,” Sophie teased.

Emi laughed and felt her pocket for Bucky. “Um, yeah. I warned him if he repeated that, I’d be spiking his food with something to prevent erections.”

* * * *

The docking crew disconnected their gangways and utility umbilicals before the hover lifts rolled them out of the protected hangar to the nearby lift pad. Logistically, lifting from Mars was much easier and took less time than from Earth because of the thinner atmosphere and no huge populated areas nearby. The men sat back as they completed the last of their pre-lift checks.