Spring According to Humphrey (6 page)

7 Test Trouble

Late in the afternoon, Mrs Brisbane said, ‘Class, it’s time for us to think about Family Fun Night. We had a meeting about it yesterday and I found out that the theme is “Circus Night”. Each class is supposed to come up with a circus-themed game or activity.’

‘I think we should string a rope across the gym and all do tightrope walking,’ Tell-the-Truth-Thomas said.

‘Do you know how to walk a tightrope?’ Mrs Brisbane asked.

‘No,’ Thomas answered. ‘But I’d like to try it. Or fly on a trapeze.’

‘Not me!’ Calm-Down-Cassie exclaimed.
‘Those sound dangerous.’

Mrs Brisbane nodded. ‘They sound dangerous to me, too. Let’s think of other circus activities.’

‘Clowns!’ Rolling-Rosie shouted. ‘We can all be clowns!’

Other classmates agreed that her idea was GREAT-GREAT-GREAT.

Mrs Brisbane nodded, but then she said, ‘I know that would be fun. But Ms Mac already signed her class up to be clowns.’

My classmates groaned. I was disappointed, too.

‘Juggling,’ Small-Paul said. ‘We could teach people to juggle.’

‘Are you good at juggling?’ Mrs Brisbane asked.

‘No,’ Small-Paul said. ‘But I’d like to learn.’

Stop-Talking-Sophie waved her hand. ‘My dad can juggle. He can juggle three balls really fast and never drop them. He can even juggle knives!’

‘I’m not sure about knives, but I think we’d all like to see him juggling, Sophie. Let’s keep on thinking,’ Mrs Brisbane continued. ‘We have some time to figure it out.’

I kept on thinking long after my friends had left Room 26 for the day.

Once Longfellow School was empty, I opened my lock-that-doesn’t-lock and hurried out of the room to visit Gigi. If I wanted to swing up to her table to see her, I’d have to get there before Aldo closed the blinds.

‘Hello, friend!’ I greeted her as I slid under the door of Room 12.

‘Humphrey!’ she answered. ‘I was hoping you’d come. I have some questions.’

I swung my way up to the table and hurried over to her cage. It was still light outside, so I could see her better than I could during the winter. I was very impressed with her dark brown fur coat. It wasn’t golden, but it was SHINY-SHINY-SHINY.

‘Did you hear about Family Fun Night?’ she asked. ‘We’re going to be clowns.’

‘I know,’ I answered. ‘My friends were disappointed. They wanted to be clowns, too.’

Gigi shook her head. ‘I don’t think I’ll make a very good clown.’

‘Of course you will,’ I said. ‘Just act silly.’

Gigi was silent before she finally said, ‘I’m not sure guinea pigs are silly.’

I wasn’t sure, either. ‘Ms Mac will help you. She always does.’

Gigi cheered up a little. ‘That’s right. She’ll help. What is your classroom doing?’

I explained that we were still trying to decide. ‘But I wanted to tell you about our signs of spring,’ I said.

Gigi listened carefully as I told her about the specks who were now swimming.

‘Wow,’ she said. ‘They sound strange and amazing.’

Amazing.
There was that word again.

‘I’m worried about Og,’ I explained. ‘He’s so quiet.’

‘Maybe he’s remembering when
he
was a tadpole. Maybe he had tadpole brothers and sisters that he misses,’ Gigi suggested.

I hadn’t thought about that at all. She might be young, but Gigi is pretty clever!

The sun was beginning to set and I knew that Gigi was ready to go to bed. Also, Aldo would start his cleaning rounds soon, and the last thing I wanted was to be caught outside of my cage.

‘You’ve been very helpful!’ I told Gigi as I slid down the table leg and raced towards the door. ‘Thanks!’

‘Thank you, Humphrey,’ she answered. ‘Come back soon!’

When I returned to Room 26, I told Og about my visit to see Gigi, but he was still unusually quiet.

Before I opened my cage door, I glanced at the swimming specks.

‘Good night, specks,’ I said.

The next day, Joey told the class, ‘I’ve been reading the book that came with the tadpoles. They have breathing gills, like fish, but skin will grow over them. And then, after a while, they’ll grow legs.’ He held up a bag. ‘These tadpoles came with food. But if they were living in a pond, they would eat algae.’

‘Ewww!’ Kelsey said.

‘It’s natural,’ Joey said. ‘I don’t think it’s “ewww”. It’s kind of wonderful.’

‘I agree, Joey,’ Mrs Brisbane said.

I heard a groan from across the room.

‘What is it, Nicole?’ Mrs Brisbane asked.

‘I don’t want to wait to see their legs!’ Nicole complained.

Nicole doesn’t like to wait. I guess that’s why I call her Not-Now-Nicole.

‘But it will be fascinating to watch each stage,’ Mrs Brisbane said.

My teacher was almost always right, but this time I wasn’t sure.

When Aldo turned on the lights that night, he was strangely quiet.

He didn’t say ‘Never fear, ’cause Aldo’s here!’ or ‘How are you, my favourite friends?’

He just pushed his cart into the room and started sweeping.

Once, he stopped to yawn – loudly.

‘Sorry, guys,’ he said. ‘I’ve been studying for two tests tomorrow. These are the big ones,’ he said. ‘And I have a history paper due.’

‘You can do it, Aldo!’ I said.

He laughed. ‘Thanks for the encouragement, Humphrey!’

I looked over at the tadpoles swimming
round and round in circles until my tummy started to hurt.

Aldo swept faster and faster, but he suddenly stopped when he reached Mrs Brisbane’s desk.

‘What’s this?’ he said as he stared at the desktop.

‘WHAT-WHAT-WHAT?’ I squeaked.

Aldo picked up an envelope. ‘It has my name on it.’

He had a puzzled look on his face as he opened the envelope and took out a piece of paper. He stared at the paper for a few seconds.

Then he said, ‘Wow!’

‘What’s the “wow”?’ I asked.

‘Thank you, Mrs Brisbane,’ he said.

He stared at the paper some more and shook his head. ‘Wow.’

After a while, he came over to our table and said, ‘I just want you to know that Mrs Brisbane is the nicest human being on earth!’

‘I couldn’t agree more,’ I squeaked.

Aldo was smiling as he left.

I was happy for him but sorry that he’d taken
the piece of paper with him. I had no idea what Mrs Brisbane had written!

Much later, after Aldo’s car left the car park, I took out my notebook and tried to think about circus activities for Family Fun Night.

I thought and thought, but I didn’t write anything down. I was still thinking about the envelope Mrs Brisbane had left for Aldo.

‘Og?’ I asked my neighbour. ‘Do you know anything about circuses?’

Actually, I was surprised when he replied with a loud ‘BOING!’

It was the first sound I’d heard coming from him in days. At least he hadn’t lost his voice.

‘I think there are funny people dressed as clowns,’ I said. ‘And maybe tightrope walkers. But what else?’

Og dived off a rock into the water side of his tank and began to splash.

‘Animals,’ I said. ‘I think animals perform. Like horses and dogs and maybe even tigers and leopards …’

I stopped cold and glanced at the aquarium.
Joey had told me the specks would turn into leopard frogs.

‘Oh,’ I said. ‘Og, do you remember? The specks – I mean tadpoles – will be leopard frogs?’

Og splashed like crazy. I raced to the far side of my cage to avoid the water. Hamsters don’t like to be wet!

‘But you’ll still be the only green frog in Room Twenty-six,’ I squeaked.

The splashing didn’t stop.

Mrs Brisbane had told us that Og was a green frog called
Rana clamitans.
It was a fancy name for a plain old frog, I thought.

‘Of course, I think green frogs are the nicest,’ I said. ‘Just wanted to let you know.’

Og stopped splashing and floated in the water. At least he’d calmed down.

‘I’m sure our friends will come up with GREAT-GREAT-GREAT ideas for Family Fun Night,’ I said. ‘They are unsqueakably clever.’

‘BOING!’ he agreed. It was the first time he’d agreed with me in a while.

Since Og seemed calmer, I opened my lock-that-doesn’t-lock and scurried over to his tank.

‘Og, do you remember being a tadpole?’ I asked. It was a very personal question, but I needed to know.

Og didn’t answer. Not a BOING, not a splash. He didn’t even look at me. He acted very strangely – even for him.

‘Tell me what you’re thinking,’ I said. ‘I’m worried about you.’

I think he nodded his head a little bit.

‘Look,’ I squeaked. ‘It doesn’t bother me that you were once a tadpole. It doesn’t bother me at all.’

I crossed my toes because what I said wasn’t exactly true.

‘Like Joey said, it’s kind of wonderful,’ I added, even though I still wasn’t sure about that. I crossed my toes harder.

‘BOING,’ Og replied.

He didn’t make another sound the whole night.