Step-Lover (16 page)

Great. Back to square one.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

“Do you want a drink?” I ask Peyton, closing the office door behind me.

She shakes her head, staring at the desk. Jesus, I have to put my hurt aside right now, because she needs me to be strong for her. I drag a chair over and sit down beside her. “Are you okay?”

She shrugs. “I don’t know. It’s strange. I know what happened to me, everyone has told me, it’s been confirmed, but . . . I don’t remember it, Aria.”

“That can’t be nice,” I say softly.

She shakes her head. “It’s not. My mom says it’s a blessing, because remembering would cause so much damage, but not remembering is seeming to do more.”

“Either way, what happened to you is going to take time to get over. You need to give yourself that time and let people help you.”

She looks to me and blinks her pretty eyes. “He thought I cheated on him,” she squeaks.

“I know.”

“I know I’m not the smartest girl, or even the best, but I would never . . .”

God, I actually think I might like this girl.

“I know,” I say again.

“He hasn’t spoken to me. The horrible thing was, when I came around the next day, he wasn’t there, and I didn’t even know why. Then I rang him and he exploded at me, called me all these names and told me he never wanted to see me again.”

“He didn’t know, honey,” I soothe.

“No, and I’m not mad at him for saying those things. If it were me, I would have done the same. I’m just so miserable without him. I love him, Aria.”

Oh god.

That makes two of us.

“And I’m sure,” I manage, “that he loves you, too.”

She nods and takes a tissue, wiping her nose.

“Do you think he’s going to hurt Brian?”

I cover her hand with mine. “I hope so.”

She smiles weakly. “I kind of do, too.”

~*~*~*~

It’s been three hours.

Blade finally returns, his fists bloody, his face a mask of anger. Whatever happened, it riled him up. He looks at the two of us sitting at the desk, and I quickly stand. This isn’t the time or the place for me to let my feelings show. He needs to be able to make a choice, or at the very least, support this girl who is hurting. I smile down at Peyton. “It was nice chatting with you. Feel better soon.”

“Thank you, Aria,” she says softly. “You’re amazing.”

I force another smile and try to step past Blade when I reach the door. “Where are you going?”

“Home,” I say. “Please move.”

He steps aside and I walk out into the garage. When I get outside, he catches up to me and grabs my arm. “Aria . . .”

I turn and face him. “You’re right. That girl, she needs you more than I do. I need to go, Blade.”

“What I said to you was uncalled for. I was angry.”

“Yeah,” I whisper looking at the floor. “Well, I’m used to it.”

With that I pull my arm out of his grip and turn, walking down the street. I call a cab and it picks me up a few blocks down. By the time I get home, my heart is aching. I want to go back and be with Blade, but I know I can’t. He needs to make up his mind about what he’s going to do, and I’m not going to be in his way while he does that.

When I get to the house, Ripley is sitting out the front on the step. I frown and pay the cab driver, then I get out and hurry up to him. “Hey dude,” I say. “What’s wrong?”

He looks up at me, and while he looks fine, I can see in his eyes that he’s pained. “It’s just been a shit day, you know? Do you want to grab a drink with me?”

I’d never say no, even though I want to go inside and soak in the bath. I can’t because Ripley has come to me, and there’s a reason for that.

“Sure.”

He stands and we both walk off down the street. There’s a café a few blocks down so we stop, grab a seat outside, and order a couple of burgers and milkshakes. I stare over at Ripley as we wait, wondering why he wants me here. He obviously has something he wants to say, but is finding it hard to express that. I just give him time, waiting painterly until he’s ready.

“I’m seeing someone,” he says finally.

I look up at him. “That’s great.”

He shakes his head, meeting my eyes. “No, it’s not. He and I . . . we thought it was fine but today a group of guys from our old school found out. They are going to announce it to the entire world, and I don’t know how to handle that.”

“Don’t you think it’s time for you to admit to what it is you’re keeping inside? Do you really think anyone will be upset at you for that?”

He sighs, running his hands through his hair. “Fuck, I don’t know. That’s the problem. I want to be loud and proud, I want to be with Matty, I want things to just be normal but I’m fuckin’ scared, Aria.”

“Of what, honey?”

He gives me a look that breaks my heart. “Of losing everyone I love.”

Oh jeez. I reach over and grab his hand. “Listen to me, your dad and brothers, they freaking adore you. Do you really think they won’t love you when they find out?”

He looks away. “Brody and Blade, they’re so masculine, so manly, they make dad so proud . . .”

My heart is ripping to pieces. “And so do you.”

He shakes his head. “I’m different. Dad and I never bonded over fishing or fast cars. I’m the outcast. What if they don’t want to accept me when they realize just how different I am?”

“If they don’t accept you, then they aren’t being true to you. If they love you like I know they do, they will deal. They might not like it, but they will deal. You don’t deserve to live like this, Lee. You deserve to be happy and if Matty makes you happy then you need to hold your head high and say fuck the rest of the world.”

He smiles, but before he can answer a voice rings out through the crowd.

“Oh look, he likes girls now.”

Ripley tenses and lets go of my hand, turning in his seat. There are a group of about five guys coming towards us. Ripley gets out of his chair quick as lightning and storms towards them, fists clenched. He’s more like this family than he realizes. I quickly get out of my chair and rush over, too.

“What? You decided the fucking dick wasn’t good enough so now you’re back to pussy? And well done, Ripley,” one guy sneers. “She’s a fuckin’ sweet pussy. Even for a fag.”

Ripley swings, hitting him in the jaw.

Then all hell breaks loose. All five guys take hold of Ripley and start pounding into him, over and over again, into his face, into his stomach. People rush over, but none of them have the guts to jump in. I do. I launch myself towards Ripley, screaming at them to stop. My step-brother’s eyes flick to me and he yells out, “Run, Aria.”

Like hell.

No one touches my brother like that.

I send a fist into one of the guy’s faces, causing him to stumble backwards. “Stupid fuckin’ bitch!” he bellows.

I don’t give him the chance to lunge at me. I bring my knee up and hit him so hard in the balls he goes flying backwards and falls to the ground. I spin and try to fight my way to Ripley, managing a couple of punches. Ripley is on the ground now, and God, there’s so much blood. Some of the onlookers have finally jumped in and a few guys are pulling these bullies back. There are still two on him, and he isn’t moving.

“Get off him, you motherfuckers!” I yell, throwing myself onto one of the guy’s backs.

I grab a fistful of his hair and I pull so hard he screams bloody murder. I tug and tug, digging my fingernails into his scalp until he’s clawing at me to try and get me off. He can’t. There is a group of people around Ripley now, so I go to jump off when the man starts charging backwards. It takes me a split second to realize he’s about to slam me into a tree.

Before I can get off, the tree comes crashing into the back of my head. Pain radiates through my skull and my entire body goes limp as I slip off the man and land with a thump on the ground. Then everything goes black.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

Blaring light is what wakes me. It’s burning into my eyes as if someone is shining a torch directly into them. I blink a few times, but my vision is hazy. There’s a pounding in my head that is constant yet quite dull, and I can hear the beeping sounds of what would seem like machines surrounding me. I blink more rapidly, and slowly my vision begins to clear and I realize I’m in the hospital.

“Oh thank god.”

With a wince, I turn my head towards my mother’s voice. She was sitting in a chair beside the bed, but is now rushing towards me. When she reaches me, her hands cup my face and she begins sobbing hysterically. I try to recall what happened and when I remember, I gasp out, “Ripley!”

“Oh honey . . . it’s so bad.”

Bad. Bad? No.

“Nurse?” she calls. “My daughter is awake.”

A nurse comes in before I can ask Mom more about what she meant by it being so ‘bad’. The nurse is young, maybe about twenty-five. She starts checking me over and asking me mindless questions that I mutter responses too. There’s a bandage around my head and my neck is stiff as hell. I don’t care about any of that; all I care about is where the hell Ripley is.

“Mum,” I plead. “Where is Ripley?”

She blinks back tears. “He’s in surgery right now.”

“W-w-w-why?” I whisper.

She takes my hand and I want to vomit. “One of his ribs punctured a lung, so they have to repair that. And . . . he hit his head so badly his brain is swelling and that’s . . . life threatening. He’s been in surgery for a few hours; we don’t know what’s going to happen but the doctor has warned us that it isn’t looking good. There was massive internal bleeding and . . .”

“No,” I scream. “No!”

“I’m so sorry honey, I don’t know what happened but . . .”

“Please,” I wail so loudly she jerks back. “No.”

“Miss, calm down,” the nurse says.

“He doesn’t deserve this,” I sob. “Momma, please.”

Mom chokes back her own sob. “I know honey.”

I start crying so hard, so fucking hard that I don’t even realize Mom is taken from the room. All I know is that a moment later, two hands are gripping my face. “Hey.”

It’s Brody.

“Aria, open your eyes.”

I’m hiccupping and sobbing, but I force my eyes open. Brody is staring down at me, his eyes glassy. God, if something happens to Ripley . . . no. It can’t. I don’t want to lose him. I don’t want to lose . . .
my family.

“Listen to me,” he says softly. “You gotta clam down.”

“H-h-h-h-he . . .”

“Hey,” he says, firmer now. “You gotta calm down or the nurse is going to make you calm down.”

I hiccup again and nod, but the tears keep pouring from my eyes. Brody strokes a thumb over one of them and murmurs, “He’s gonna get through this, you hear me?”

I sob and nod.

“And so are you.”

He lifts his head and looks to the door, and then lets me go and steps back. I turn my head to see Blade and Jack standing at the door. They look like hell. Jack’s eyes are red and bloodshot and Blade looks as if he’s been running a marathon and hasn’t stopped all day. Their eyes swing to me, and my tears fall harder.

Jack steps forward first and places a rough, scratchy hand to my cheek. This brings me so much comfort. “So fucking glad to see you awake, honey.”

I swallow and nod, trying to stop my tears.

“How’re you feeling?”

Who cares how I’m feeling?

“Jack,” I croak. “I tried.”

“Tried what?” Blade asks, finally speaking.

His eyes are soft and he looks as if he wants to reach out and take me into his arms, but he can’t. No matter how much I want him to.

“I tried to help him,” I whisper, looking away.

“What happened out there, honey?” Jack says. “It might help if the doctors know.”

I close my eyes and take a deep breath. It’s time they all knew.

“Ripley . . . he’s been struggling. He’s been confiding in me about those struggles.”

All the men’s eyes narrow, and set onto my face.

“Struggle?” Brody asks, confused.

I take the time to look each one of them in the eyes before I say, “Ripley is gay.”

They all have a different reaction. Blade’s hands turn into fists, Jack gasps and Brody looks away with a tight jaw.

I go on quickly. “He’s been hiding it because he loves you all so much. He didn’t want to let you down, but most of all he didn’t want you all to hate him.”

“Jesus,” Blade growls. “Stupid fuckin’ boy.”

“He thought I’d hate him?” Jack breathes, looking so hurt it crushes me.

Brody still says nothing.

“He’s scared, he’s unsure, and he feels different to all of you. He feels he doesn’t fit in because he isn’t as rugged and strong. He didn’t want to lose you guys.”

“My boy,” Jack rasps. “Fuck. I should have known.”

“How did that end up with this?” Brody finally says through clenched teeth.

“He’s been seeing someone,” I say softly. “A guy named Matty. A group of guys he went to school with found out and taunted him. He came to my house and we went for a milkshake. We were talking, and luck would have it they were walking past. They started taunting him and saying crude things about me, so Ripley got up and he threw a punch.”

“Ripley threw a punch?” Jack asks.

I smile painfully. “Yeah, he was defending me.”

“What happened next?” Blade asks, his eyes on mine.

“There were five of them,” My throat suddenly gets tight as I remember how desperate I felt. “They were just laying into him. I tried to help; I threw myself in the fight to get him out. He was on the floor and . . .” I start sobbing again and this time it’s Blade who takes my hand, squeezing it. “He wasn’t moving. There was so much blood. Some people had stepped in to help, but I just wanted to get to him.”

“Jesus, honey,” Jack says. “You tried to save my boy.”

“After he tried to defend me,” I cry, dropping my head.

“What happened to you?” Brody asks.

I swallow. “I leapt onto this guy’s back, trying to get him to back away. I was just ripping into his hair, trying to make him hurt, and he slammed me backwards into a tree.”

Blade’s hand goes so tight around mine I feel as if he’s going to snap it off.

“Oh sweetheart,” Jack says. “I’m so sorry.”

“What for?” I sob, wiping the tears away furiously. “It isn’t me who . . . who . . .”

“Hey,” Jack says, stepping over to my left. He leans down and cups my face. “Don’t you dare. We’re all prayin’ for Lee, but honey, when you were down and out . . . we were all prayin’ for you, too.”

I start crying harder and he wraps his arms around me, pulling me into his chest. Blade’s hand releases mine and right away I want it back. Jack holds me and I clutch his shirt, crying so hard my body shakes. The nurse comes in, offers some ‘assistance’ for my hysteria, and Blade tells her to fuck off, literally. When my crying has subsided, Jack finally pulls back and swipes my cheeks dry with his shirt.

“You stood up for my son,” he says softly. “I can’t thank you enough for that, honey.”

“I’m sorry, Jack,” I whisper. “I’m sorry I pushed you all away and said I didn’t want another family. The truth is . . . I have come to realize just how much I love all of you.”

Jack smiles and leans back. “Well, it’s safe to say we’re pretty damned attached to you, too.”

My bottom lip trembles again and Mom enters the room. She’s composed now and as soon as Jack sees her, he goes over and pulls her into his arms. She clings to him and they stand there, holding each other for the longest time. When she pulls back, she rushes to my side. “I’m sorry, baby.”

“Don’t be,” I croak. “We’re all here now. It’s the best we can do.”

“You need to rest. You look exhausted.”

I nod. She’s right; my head is pounding now.

“Can you, ah, get the nurse to bring me some pain medication?”

She nods and kisses my head. “I love you, Aria.”

“Me too, Mom.”

She leaves and five minutes later returns with a nurse. They give me more medication, and then Mom tells me she’s going to sit with Jack while I rest.

“Are you going to be okay on your own?” Mom asks.

My eyes flick to Blade and he says, “I’ll sit with her, Nancy. I know where you are if you need.”

She nods and smiles at him. “Thank you honey.”

I get a few hugs and then everyone leaves. When they’re gone and the door is closed, Blade turns to me. The smile he had on his face slips and he walks over, wrapping his hand around the back of my neck and lifting my face up to his. “Don’t you ever scare me like that again.”

“I’m sorry,” I breathe.

“God baby . . . I fuckin’ thought . . .”

I reach up and cup his face. He turns into my palm and closes his eyes. He’s hurting. He not only thought he was going to lose me, but Ripley too.

“Get in with me,” I croak.

He doesn’t hesitate. He climbs into the bed with me and tucks me into his arms. I cling to him and we’re silent for a while. We’re silent because his body is shaking softly, and I know he’s crying. That hurts me—it hurts because I can’t imagine the pain he’s feeling right now. After a few more minutes, his fingers sift through my hair and he rasps, “I love you, Aria.”

My body goes tight and I whisper, “What?”

“Should have said it before, but I was too fuckin’ proud and too scared to let you in, but it’s the truth. It’s been the truth since the start. I don’t want anyone else but you, and baby, I’m tired of tryin’ to deny that.”

More tears flow. I can’t believe there are actually any left.

“I love you too,” I breathe.

“I’m sorry, darlin’. Sorry for the way I treated you when Peyton was at the garage.”

“You were right; it wasn’t the time for my jealously. I was wrong to even think about anything else but her.”

“I told her everything.”

I blink. “You did?”

“Yeah. I told her I’m sorry for what happened and I’d be there for her, and I will, but I couldn’t pretend that my feelings for her were even close to what they are for you. It wouldn’t have been fair to her, and she deserves someone amazing because she’s an amazing girl.”

God, he’s a good man.

“Is she okay?” I ask.

“She didn’t take it too well at first, but when she calmed down she said she was happy for us, and she hoped I found what I was looking for.”

Damn, I really do like that girl.

“I hated hurting her, especially after what happened, but I can’t lie anymore. I can’t pretend anymore. I want this, Tulip, and I want it for the rest of my fuckin’ life.”

I cling to him. “Me too.”

“For now, though, I just want my brother to come out of this alive.”

I couldn’t be more with him if I tried.

Please, God. Let Ripley pull through.