Stepbrother HOT! (The Stepbrother Romance Series - Book #3) (3 page)

Just as I was about to come, my dream evaporated. I
woke up as the sound of my mom knocking on the door. I was drenched in sweat,
breathing heavy, my pussy soaking wet; but the second time Mom knocked, I
realized where I was, what I was doing. “Yeah, Mom, I’m awake!” She opened the
door and looked in, and even as half-asleep as I still was, I could tell she
was relieved to see I was by myself. I was relieved that I was actually in
pajamas and not naked. She was smiling, but she wasn’t quite looking at me,
looking at the bed instead of at my face.

“Good. Breakfast in an hour and then we’re all going
out to the mountain.” I remembered that Bob and Mom had agreed that we’d have
the rest of the holiday together as a family—that we’d have “family days.” I
sighed but nodded.

“Sounds good,” I said. Mom turned to leave.
“Mom—before we eat—can we please just talk about what happened yesterday? I
swear to God, Mom…” She shook her head.

“No. We’re not going to talk about it. Be ready for
breakfast in an hour.” Mom held up her hand to keep me from saying anything else,
and closed the door behind her, leaving me alone once more.
An
hour.
I fell back onto the bed, my head among the pillows. Well, I
thought; at least I had some time to take care of the most important problem on
my mind.

I slipped my hand down the front of my pajama pants
and closed my eyes, calling the dream to mind once more. I knew I shouldn’t
even think about it—I should force myself to think about something else. But I
thought about Jaxon in the dream, kissing me, nibbling along the column of my throat,
his hand sliding up between my legs, stroking me up and down slowly. I thought
about him teasing me, stroking my soaking wet folds, finding my clit by touch.
Then I imagined him going down on me, burying his face against my pussy,
licking and sucking until I gushed on his tongue. I started rubbing my clit
with my fingers, biting my bottom lip as I thought about the two times we’d
been together, my pussy getting wetter and wetter every moment. I remembered
the way Jaxon had felt inside of me, how good he was—hot and hard. I twisted
and writhed on the sheets, moaning as quietly as I could, feeling myself
getting more and more turned on by the moment.

The sheets and blankets tangled around my legs and
my hips started moving as I rubbed myself, my fingers dropping down to my inner
labia. I slid one finger inside of me while I kept stroking my clit, turning my
face into the pillow as my moans got louder. I kept picturing Jaxon in my head,
imagining him teasing me, devouring my pussy, imagining him thrusting into me
hard and fast. In a matter of moments I was coming, arching off the bed and
burying my face in the pillows. The spasms of pleasure abated after a few
moments, and I lay there, gasping and panting, for a moment at least satisfied.

I checked the time and saw that I had about thirty
minutes before Mom expected me at breakfast; I took a quick shower and then
blow-dried my hair—I knew Mom would want to head out to the mountain
immediately after, and there wouldn’t be time for my hair to dry on its own. I braided
it and got into some of my warmest clothes—thick jeans with thermals
underneath, a stay-dry shirt under a sweater, thick socks—and put out my pads
and helmet on my bed.

I got to the table for breakfast just before Jaxon.
As usual, there was a huge spread: eggs, bacon, pancakes, and fruit. Mom and
Bob were having their coffee, eating in near-silence. I sat down, expecting
another barrage of conversation openers from my new step-dad, but apparently he
got the memo about the new family situation being awkward. I wasn’t sure which
was worse: the need to keep up appearances and pretend
like
I was really interested in getting to know my “new family” or the deep silence
that covered everyone at the table. I wasn’t about to break it.

It was the longest breakfast I can ever remember
having; nobody really spoke, except to ask someone to pass something or
another. Bob and Mom weren’t acting their usual newlywed selves, but I didn’t
know why; I couldn’t imagine that Mom had actually told him what was going on
between Jaxon and me. I thought if she had there would be an end to the happy
family times theme of this holiday nightmare. I looked around the table a few
times as I tried to eat as quickly as possible; Jaxon still looked angry and I
wondered if it was because of his dad talking about him the night before, or
the whole sorry situation. I couldn’t be sure—every time I looked at him, Jaxon
was staring down at his plate.

I decided it was probably for the best; it was hard
enough not to think about Jaxon—how hot he was, how good he was in the
sack—without him looking at me. I tried to decide which would make me more
miserable: Jaxon totally ignoring me, or Jaxon being a constant temptation,
acting the way he had the first day or two that we’d been on vacation, showing
me around the house, taking an interest. I’d told him the night before that it
would be better for us to give each other some space, but I almost regretted it
after the dream I’d had. I knew it was wrong, and I knew that I shouldn’t give
into temptation, but I still wanted him. It was going to make the whole stupid,
long day even worse, and I knew it; but I couldn’t make myself stop wanting
him. I could only force myself to ignore him, and hope that my mom would
eventually forget about finding us in bed together.

I was more than happy to finish the food in front of
me. “Are we still going out to the mountain?” I asked, finally breaking the
thick silence that had hung over all of us. Mom looked up from her plate,
startled.

“Of course, sweetie,” she said, her voice soft but
her eyes still hard as she smiled at me.
“A nice day of
skiing and snowboarding for all of us.
You should go finish getting
ready.” I nodded and took my plate into the kitchen, setting it in the sink
before I headed back to my room. I didn’t want to spend an entire day only a
few yards away from Jaxon, but unable to talk to him about what really
mattered. I didn’t want to spend an entire day around my mom, knowing that she
blamed me for ruining the holiday. I wanted to go back to the campus and
pretend the whole thing had never happened at all; but I would just have to
suck it up. I went into my room and checked over my gear, made sure my board
was in good shape. At least, I thought, I’d be on the mountain, and that was
something. I’d be doing one of my favorite things. That would help the
situation at least a little bit.

Chapter
Four

At any other time in my life, a trip to the slopes
would be the exact cure for whatever was wrong with me. When we left the house
in Bob’s SUV, all of our stuff loaded into the back, Jaxon and I sat as far
away from each other as we possibly could. Up front, Bob and Mom had regained
some of their coziness, and I had to listen to them teasing each other and
telling jokes about the virtues of exercise. My stomach was churning and I
regretted how much I had eaten for breakfast that morning. I shifted in the
seat as we drove out to the mountain—farther away than the one that Jaxon and I
had gone to before; it was a resort, complete with a lodge that doubled as a
hotel. We wouldn’t be staying the night, but the lodge would be there for us to
grab lunch and maybe dinner, and any snacks.

We finally got to the mountain and Jaxon and I
grabbed our boards while our parents both took their time gathering up their
skis. “This is ridiculous,” Jaxon murmured. I couldn’t help but agree; but I
thought, as long as I was boarding the day couldn’t possibly be that bad.

Jaxon and I were careful to take separate lifts up
to the top of the slope; I wished I could have the time to talk to him, but it
would only make Mom suspicious if she found out about it. Instead I just
decided to focus on getting in some good practice and having fun. If I could
manage to ignore Mom and Bob, it would be even better.

Of course, it wasn’t as easy as that. Mom insisted
on us all going down the mountain together again and again—she wanted us to
race, she wanted to see who could do the best tricks. She was playing the
family togetherness idea to the hilt. After a while, fortunately, she and Bob
got all involved in each other once more, totally ignoring Jaxon and me. I
decided that I was going to just keep going down the mountain and back up again
on the lift, over and over again, until I was exhausted. I had a few moves that
I needed to practice before major competitions began, assuming I could still
bear to be on the team.

I couldn’t stop watching Jaxon as he made his way
down the mountain; I couldn’t stop thinking about the whole stupid situation.
We wanted each other, but we couldn’t have each other. We couldn’t even talk
about the fact that we wanted each other. We were siblings by marriage; our
parents had had no idea that we’d even known each other. I kept remembering the
sight of my mom’s face when she’d opened the door to my room and found
me and Jaxon there, naked
. I had ruined everything for
her—her entire picture of a big family, happy brother and sister. I could tell
she was struggling to keep things to herself—that she didn’t want to tell Bob.
She wanted to pretend
like
it had never happened; she
didn’t even want to listen to my side of it—because that would make it real. If
we never talked about it, it was just something she’d imagined.

I went down the slope again and again, trying to
pull off the harder tricks I’d been teaching myself, but I couldn’t seem to
find my rhythm. Everything was off. Normally I would be able to put every
thought aside—I’d gone snowboarding once during final exams week in high school
and been able to put every thought of chemistry and statistics behind me
completely. But this situation hung over my head way more heavily. I couldn’t
stop thinking about it—the way that I wanted Jaxon, how guilty I felt about how
upset I’d made my mom. Instead of getting better at the tricks I kept falling;
I seemed to miss the mark on my spins, and when I did aerials I anticipated the
landings, instead of timing them properly. I decided to stop for a while,
hoping it was just jitters or something like that.

Jaxon wasn’t doing much better; I watched him going
down the slopes, watched him from a distance as he hit the half-pipe setup
they’d built specifically for boarders. He never got injured, but he was trying
riskier and riskier things, and barely managing to land them—sometimes not
landing them at all. I hoped my mom was having a better time than I was; I was
miserable.

I saw Mom and Bob at different points in the
day—they at least seemed happy, and I hoped that I could just be happy for Mom
and just deal with the crap with Jaxon another time. If I kept trying, I had to
be able to forget all about him; I grabbed a snack at the lodge, and I breezed
past Jaxon as best as I could back to the mountain. If I could just find my
rhythm, I thought—everything would be right in the world once more. I went to
the top of the slope again, and tried to hit my speed. I tried it again and
again and again until I was exhausted. My legs were screaming with a deep-down
ache, and I knew I’d gotten more than a few bruises from the tumbles I took. I
knew I would be in pain the next day, but I didn’t care; the snow and the cold
made me numb down to my bones, in spite of the layers. If only my brain could
be as numb, if only my heart could be as numb as my body was. It would be a
million times easier to deal with the rest of the vacation if only I could stop
caring, stop feeling so guilty, stop feeling so ashamed.
If I
could stop wanting Jaxon.
If I could just be a normal
girl on a vacation with her new family.

At one point, Mom insisted that she and I should go
down the slope together; I had to keep to her pace, standing a few feet away,
watching Bob cheer her on as she slalomed down the trail. I wished that Jaxon
and I could just be alone on the slopes
like
we had
been before. But it was obvious to me that while Mom might not want to talk
about the situation, she was determined as she could be that Jaxon and I
wouldn’t get an opportunity to be alone together—she didn’t want it to happen
again. I guess she thought that as long as we were all together, as long as
Jaxon and I were in front of our parents, we’d have to behave. Maybe she
thought that it would get easier. I was bored with just riding down after just
one trip with my mom, but she insisted on going again, this time with Bob.

I wanted to just leave. But if I told Mom that it
would just cause a scene. I wanted to do something else; but she and Bob both
were set on us all hanging out together, all enjoying the great conditions on
the mountain. If I tried to tell Mom I just wanted to go back to the house and
hang out by myself, she’d pick a fight and the whole ugly mess would come
tumbling out. As much as I wanted to talk to her—alone—about the situation,
make her understand that I wasn’t some brother-humping freak, I didn’t want to
have to deal with the guilt and ugliness of Bob knowing about it.

She left me alone again for a while, and I tried to
get my sense of speed back, tried to do the most basic tricks. I managed to get
a few in without face-planting but anytime I tried anything more advanced than
the most basic grab or aerial, I ended up landing wrong. The whole situation
was wrong, I thought.
Every last bit of it.
Mom being
married to Bob, Jaxon and I wanting each other but not being able to do
anything about it, the whole situation was just incredibly fucked up. I
couldn’t wait for the nightmare to be over. I headed to the half-pipe and tried
to gain my bearings—but I kept slipping. I decided to just stick to going down
the slope, gaining speed and landing things right. I wasn’t about to give up on
my progress just because my whole life was getting fucked up by my mom making a
stupid impulsive decision.