Stiffs and Swine (26 page)

James dialed the Texas number, and when a man with a deep, raspy voice answered the phone, he asked, “Is this Mr. Leggett?”

“Depends who’s callin’,” the man replied.

“I’m Murphy Alistair’s assistant. I’m calling because Ms. Alistair requires a bit more information for the exciting new book she’s writing. I apologize for phoning you at home and on a Sunday, but the chapter she’s writing about Jimmy Lang … and you, of course, is
very
important,” he added hastily and tried to ignore the fact that the looks he was currently receiving from his friends contained enough acid to burn holes right through his body.

“Well, sure thang. Anything to help that nice writer lady.”

James set the phone to speaker mode.

“I’m going to put you on speaker, Mr. Leggett. That way I can take notes for Ms. Alistair,” James lied glibly. “What we’re trying to figure out today is what Jimmy liked to do in his free time. For example, we’d like to know who his friends were. Do you happen to recall Jimmy having a friend in San Antonio?”

“Yep. Some fella he met at a bar-b-cue fair a few years back.” Mr. Leggett gave a dry laugh. “At first I thought Jimmy was sweet on some gal down in San Anton’, ’cause he drove there quite a bit, but then he told me he was startin’ a side business with some fella there. Don’t know what they was up to, but Jimmy must’ve been doin’ just fine with it. He bought that big ole trailer with the money he made. Shoot, that camper thang’s so big my whole family could fit in there, and there’s nine of us Leggetts.”

“How do you know that Jimmy’s new business paid for that? Hailey believes Jimmy’s aunt left him an inheritance.”

“Pffah!” Mr. Leggett guffawed. “What aunt? Jimmy’s been a ward of the state since he first opened his eyes. He ain’t got no family, and none of his foster families would go leavin’ him a pile of money. They ain’t got none themselves.”

“I guess he could have taken out a loan,” James persisted, hoping to glean more information from Jimmy’s boss.

His ploy worked. “Look, I
know
the fella that sold Jimmy his camper. He said Jimmy walked in with a grocery sack full of greenbacks and drove that camper off the lot an hour later, neat as you please. Jimmy told
me
that he wasn’t gonna work for me no more after his trip to Virginia, so it’s a good thang I took him on his word and put an ad in the paper. I got me a new boy startin’ Monday. Can drive the tow truck and help me with these confounded computers. Not a bad deal.”

James felt a momentary pang of sympathy for Jimmy Lang. He had no family to speak of, his girlfriend had a new man, and his boss had a replacement driver ready and waiting to take over Jimmy’s job.

Would anyone even miss Jimmy? To be so easily forgotten except by those trying to solve the mystery of one’s murder doesn’t make a pleasant epitaph
, James thought morosely.

“You still there?” Mr. Leggett asked anxiously from Waxahachie, Texas.

“Yes, sir. I was just gathering my thoughts.” James glanced briefly at Lucy, but she was intently studying her fingernails and frowning in concentration. Finally, she looked up and whispered, “Mexico.”

“Ah, back to Jimmy’s hobbies and such, did he travel anywhere besides to cook-offs?” James asked in a businesslike tone. “How about out of the country?”

“If you count Mexico as bein’ another country, then yeah,” Jimmy’s boss answered immediately. “Sometimes you can’t tell the difference between Texas and Mexico, but Jimmy went there. Always brought me a bottle of Patrón tequila, too. I’m gonna miss those freebies.”

“Did he happen to drive his cooker down with him?” James asked timidly, knowing what an odd question it was.

“Funny thing, that, but he did. I figured ole Jimmy was givin’ those Mexicans a few lessons in exchange for booze or other kinds of favors.” Mr. Leggett chuckled.

“He liked tequila that much?” James shared in the joke.

“Jimmy liked to drink everything, eat everything, smoke everything, and talk to every cute girl he saw. And he talked big. Shoot, he lived
big
. That’s why he and Texas made such a purty pair.”

James asked, “And Hailey? Did she live big, too?”

“Nah. She’s a churchgoer and Jimmy’s little shadow. Ain’t got nothin’ going on of her own, that girl. She’s gonna be lost without Big Jim,” Mr. Leggett stated confidently.

Noting the frowns on Lindy’s and Lucy’s faces, James replied, “Oh, I wouldn’t be too sure about that, Mr. Leggett. I’ve got to type up these notes now, so thank you for your time.”

“Hey!” Jimmy’s boss quickly shouted, before James could hang up. “You think this book’s gonna be in Wal-Mart?”

James shook his head and took the phone off speaker mode. “I don’t know, sir, but I’m sure Ms. Alistair will mail you an autographed copy or two.”

“Hot dog! I’m gonna be famous!” Mr. Leggett hollered in farewell.

James replaced the receiver and remained silent. Mr. Leggett’s reaction to Murphy’s publishing success was quite the opposite of James’s friends.

“Well, you might not have been lying to the poor man, James,” Lucy said acidly. “Murphy may be busy as a little beaver gathering material for a book on the Hog Fest murder.”

Gillian touched Lucy’s hand. “Let’s cleanse our minds of this subject and place our focus on a woman who may need our help. Think of Hailey now.”

Lindy nodded. “You’re right, Gillian. Sorry to sound like Dr. Seuss, but if she found Jimmy’s stash of cash, Mitch may go after her.”

“She’s not going to miss the announcement of the Hog Fest Barbecue Champion,” Bennett chimed in. “So she’s bound to be at the closing ceremony.”

James checked his watch. “We’ve got two hours until then. Let’s track her down and stay by her side. That way, nothing can happen to her.”

In full agreement, the group trotted off to the camper Hailey had rented from R. C. The door was ajar, so James pulled it all the way open and called out Hailey’s name. After stepping inside, he immediately backed out and turned to face his friends.

“I’m having some serious déjà vu. Hailey’s camper has been trashed.” He jerked his head toward the door. “Gillian, I’m afraid you were right. Mitch Walker is still here and he’s really pissed off.”

As the rest
of the supper club members debated over whether to contact the sheriff regarding the state of Hailey’s trailer, James decided to place another call to the Fitzgerald brothers. He had plugged his phone into a wall outlet while at the community center and, while it was nowhere near fully charged, he believed he had enough juice for a short call. This time, he dialed the twins in their apartment instead of using Mrs. Lamb’s home number.

Francis answered immediately. “Do you need us to do more computer forensics, Professor?” he asked James eagerly.

“Not exactly. I just wanted to know the full name of the ringleader of that teen group coming to our library on Fridays. I know his first name’s Martin, but I wanted to double-check the last name.”

Francis murmured something to Scott. “Just wanted to ask Scott before I told you something erroneous, but it’s Trotman. Martin Trotman.”

“Gotcha!” James smiled. “I don’t know what the outcome of the Hog Fest mystery will be, but I can tell you right now that we are going to solve the Shenandoah County Library mystery this Friday night.”

“Really? Cool.” Francis whispered something to Scott. “In that case, can we let Mrs. Waxman have the night off? Scott and I want to be there when this all goes down.”

“Absolutely, boys. I can’t think of anyone I’d rather have by my side when we put a stop to their little business.”

“Are you going to tell us what it is?” Francis was breathless with curiosity.

“When I get back,” James answered. “I’m not trying to hold out, but catching them in the act is going to take some planning, and I don’t want to go into it until we can meet to discuss strategy. However, I was wondering if you guys have one of those little cameras that you can mount in some unobtrusive location and watch the feed on a computer screen?”

“We do, actually. We tried to talk Mrs. Lamb into letting us set up a security system for her, but she said if anyone breaks in she’ll crack them on the head with her iron, so we just use the camera as a web cam now. It’s a piece of cake to hook up.”

“Bring all that stuff to work tomorrow, will you? I’ve got a special assignment for you and Scott. Technical stuff.”

“Awesome! Sounds like a Special Ops mission. You can count on us, Professor!”

James gazed at the blinking symbol indicating his phone’s dwindling battery life and stuffed the soon-to-be-useless gadget into his pocket. It would have to remain in its dormant state until he hooked it up to the car charger in the Bronco. As James watched his friends talk, he couldn’t help but notice the bulges in both Bennett’s back pockets, and assumed his friend was carrying his wallet and his mini-recorder.

“I’m not even gonna ask why you’re checkin’ out my behind,” Bennett said. He jerked his thumb toward Hailey’s camper. “We’re off to visit Bob Barker—see if he and his fiancée are killin’ time before the announcement of the Hog Fest champion. If she’s not with him, I’m gonna place a personal call to that fine, fine Sheriff Jones.”

Bob Barker’s camper was only minutes away. The contractor was inside fussing over his graying hair and had the door propped open. Singing along with Sinatra, Bob met the supper club members at the door with a smile. With one hand still slimed with hair gel, he took a final swipe over his hair, slicking the strands into place on the sides and forcing the front into stiff, upright rows.

“Almost time to hear who’s the champ of ’cue.” Bob grinned as he shaped his hair. “Doesn’t matter to me, though. I’ve got my Hailey and she’s the
real
prize. If you folks are lookin’ for her, she’s primpin’ for the closing ceremony. Did y’all know she won the Anything Butt category? She’s got a shot at winnin’ the whole shebang!”

“She won? With barbecued raccoon?” Lindy asked in repulsed shock.

Bob laughed. “Oh, the rumors that go around during cook-offs! You must’ve been talkin’ to one of those Marrow Men. They’ve been steamed up that a woman might steal that Heartland Foods contract from them since they found out Hailey was the real talent behind the Pitmasters.”

Noting the look of pride on Bob’s face, James assumed that he and Hailey had reached an understanding over establishing equality in their relationship. “What was her entry?” he asked.

“Believe it or not,” Bob answered while rinsing his hand in the small sink behind him, “she made barbecued Spam. Some of the other competitors argued that it was an illegal entry, but Mr. Richter said it was a-okay for the Anything Butt category.” He dried his hands on a checkered dishcloth and then folded it neatly and placed it on the tiny countertop. “We came in second with my salmon specialty. Don’t know what those Marrow Men were thinkin’ makin’ goat with yogurt sauce. Came out way too runny.”

Lucy stepped forward and touched Bob briefly on the shoulder. “Are you sure Hailey’s back at her camper? The new one she rented?”

Bob nodded. “The rented one, yeah. She’d never go back into the old one. She said she took what she needed from inside and gave the cops the keys. It’s all locked up. No one can get in except for them. Why are you asking anyhow?”

“We just came from Hailey’s RV and she’s not there,” Lucy began to explain when Gillian interjected.

“Someone has been in her camper, obviously looking for something.” Gillian reached forward, pushing Lucy out of the way, and grasped Bob’s shoulders. “Now, focus on my face, Bob, and take a deep breath in. Right now. Deep breath in. With me. Her camper’s been ransacked, Bob, and there’s no sign of Hailey.”

Stunned, Bob did as Gillian instructed, but then he shook her off and began pacing up and down the narrow aisle of the camper. “Not again! Look, will someone tell me what is going on here? If you’re not Jimmy’s killer,” he pointed at Gillian, “and I’m not and Hailey’s not, then is it Mitch? Over the drugs in Jimmy’s grill? And is he now after my girl?” He stopped pacing, his face tight with anger. “Tell me! Has he got her? She could be out there, needin’ me, and I don’t know where! Someone tell me what the
hell
is happenin’!”

“Mr. Barker, Hailey may be in danger,” Lucy answered in a calm, flat voice. “She might be in possession of money that Mitch Walker believes belongs to him. Mitch was Jimmy’s partner in this drug business, but it appears that Jimmy may have kept more than his share of the profits.”

“There’s a motive for murder—wrapped up all nice and pretty!” Lindy added with dramatic flair.

“Well, I’ve got to find her!” Bob tried to elbow James and Bennett aside. “He can have the cash! He can have whatever he wants as long as my Hailey doesn’t get hurt!”

Gillian grabbed Bob’s arm. “Wait! We must pause and
concentrate
on where she could be. There is too much ground to cover to just run off in all directions. Please, let’s all sit for a moment and
think
.”

Bob cracked his knuckles one by one in agitation, but followed Gillian’s advice.

“First things first,” Lucy stated in her deputy voice as she squeezed onto the sofa in between James and Bennett. “Bennett, you need to call the sheriff and go wait for her at Hailey’s rented RV.” She checked her watch. “One of us needs to be at the closing ceremony, in case Mitch shows up there. We know which kids to keep an eye on, even better than the deputies do. Now, I know there will plenty of police presence there, but anything can happen.”

“I’ll go,” Lindy volunteered. “No one can read a high schooler like I can.”

“Why do you think Mitch will be at the ceremony?” Bob looked confused. “Isn’t everybody huntin’ him?”

“Yes,” James nodded, “but he may try to pass a brief message on to some of his buyers.”

“Okay, you guys get going.” Lucy continued to command her troops. She pushed her cell phone into Bennett’s hand and he and Lindy left Bob’s camper. With Bennett gone, James was able to spread out by a few inches on the scratchy sofa.

Gillian, who had settled herself in the camper’s passenger seat, began to hum quietly. Bob, James, and Lucy exchanged perplexed glances.

“What’s that loopy lady doin’?” Bob demanded. “We should get moving!”

Lucy held up a finger. “Just give her a minute. Sometimes she comes up with the craziest ideas that end up making perfect sense.”

They were quiet for several seconds, listening to the rhythmic sounds of Gillian’s humming, which seemed to have mutated into some kind of musical chant. Suddenly, she opened her eyes and swiveled around in the seat. “The Spam!”

“What?” the other three said in unison.

“Felicity had some in her tent. She said it’s a convenient way for her to get protein when she’s on the road.” Gillian rose from her seat. “She told me she knows a dozen different ways of cooking it, and one is more delicious than the next! Don’t you see?” Her face was aglow with excitement. “Hailey was with Felicity only yesterday. Remember? She and Felicity talked and then Hailey went out to rent her own RV from R. C.’s company. Felicity must have told Hailey how to barbecue Spam!”

“So you think Hailey’s seeking refuge with Felicity right now?” James asked.

“Yes.” Gillian closed her eyes again. “Felicity has such a kind soul, such an open and
nurturing
spirit—someone like Hailey would be absolutely
drawn
to Felicity, especially when looking for a safe harbor.”

“Lead the way, Gillian,” Lucy said. “I think you’re onto something.”

James thought of the agility with which Mitch Walker had handled the welding torch. “Ah, shouldn’t we take a weapon of some sort?”

Lucy shrugged. “The method Mitch used to kill Jimmy was pretty cowardly, so I don’t think he’s packing a gun. Besides, there are four of us. I think we can take him, James.”

Feeling a tad emasculated by Lucy’s confidence, James was relieved and grateful to note that Bob had armed himself with a grilling fork. “It’s real sharp,” he whispered to James as they jumped out of the camper and turned toward the river.

By the time they reached Felicity’s tent, announcements were being made through loudspeakers in the distance that the moment had arrived for the public to make their way to their seats in order to enjoy the final event of Hog Fest. The closing ceremony was set to begin in thirty minutes.

Felicity’s tent was empty but, unlike Hailey’s camper, it was completely tidy. In fact, it looked as though Felicity had packed most of her belongings and stowed them in her old Suburban in preparation to leave. All four of her dogs were locked in their cages and were barking with such animation that Lucy gave them her full attention.

“These guys aren’t just greeting us,” she said seriously, “I think they’re upset.” She squatted down next to the pen bearing Vicar’s name and tried to calm him, but he would not cease his frantic barking.

“Is something wrong, Vicar?” Lucy asked the collie while Bob rolled his eyes in disbelief. “Where’s your mama?” At the word
mama
, Vicar’s barking became frenzied and he repeatedly pawed at the door to his cage. Lucy ducked inside Felicity’s tent and re-emerged with a gauzy lavender scarf she had seen wrapped around Felicity’s waist the first time they had noticed her as she passed by Jimmy at his cooker. Forcing the scarf through the bars of the cage, Lucy pressed it against Vicar’s nose.

“Show me Mama!” she commanded and then began to undo the cage lock.

“What are you doing?” Bob asked in alarm.

Ignoring him, Lucy swung back the door and repeated “Show me Mama!” in a stern and commanding voice.

Vicar seemed to understand completely, for though he immediately dashed from his cage and darted into the nearby woods, he reappeared again a few seconds later, tail wagging, tongue lolling, and eyes wild as he waited for the slow humans to catch up to him.