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Authors: Candy Harper

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‘Is Lauren not in today?’ Milly asked on Monday morning.

‘I haven’t seen her yet,’ I said. Lauren hadn’t texted me to say she was ill and I was still hoping she might turn up. But after we’d finished registration and got
half an hour into the first lesson I had to admit to myself that it didn’t seem likely she’d be coming in today.

I couldn’t concentrate on the book in front of me. I was fed up. Angry. If Lauren was off sick again, why hadn’t she told me?

School seemed to drag on even longer than it usually does, but as soon as I got outside after the final bell I fished my mobile out of the bottom of my bag and called Lauren.

It took a while for her to answer. ‘Hi,’ she said as if everything was fine.

‘Why didn’t you tell me you weren’t coming to school?’ I asked.

‘Sorry, I just felt really rough this morning. I would’ve texted you, but I’ve been asleep most of the day.’

‘What’s the matter with you? Have you been sick?’

‘No, I’m just really tired.’

‘Have you been to the doctor?’

She sighed. ‘I’m not that bad, honestly.’

There was a pause. ‘So you’ll be in tomorrow?’ I asked.

‘I . . . I don’t think so.’

‘Lauren! I thought you said you didn’t feel that bad. We’ve got drama tomorrow. I’ll never hear the end of it from Milly if you’re not there.’

‘Milly can go stuff herself.’

I didn’t think it was fair to be turning on Milly again. ‘Well, actually, I can sort of see where she’s coming from. You promised you’d be there. It’s not
surprising that Mil—’

‘Can you stop going on about Milly?’

‘All right, all right, but I don’t really understand what your problem with her is.’

‘I don’t care about Milly!’

I didn’t know why she was getting so worked up. ‘If you’re not mad with Milly, why didn’t we go bowling on Saturday?’

‘I told you; I didn’t feel like it.’

Her voice was hard. I couldn’t believe she was getting snippy with me.

‘But maybe I did,’ I said. ‘And maybe it would’ve been nice if you’d asked me what I thought.’

‘Oh, I am sorry! I do apologise for being ill.’

‘What do you mean? You never said you were ill on Saturday.’

‘Maybe I couldn’t get a word in edgeways because you were going on and on about drama scenes and stupid pigging singing!’

That was so unfair and she knew it. I’d asked her several times on the bus if she was all right and every time she’d brushed me off.

‘You used to like “stupid pigging” singing. I’m sorry if I’m getting too childish for you. Forget about coming to the concert if it’s too much
bother.’

She sucked in her breath. ‘Amelia! Don’t be like that. Of course I’m coming to the concert. I do care about it. I even care about this daft drama scene.’

‘So you’ll come in tomorrow?’

‘I
can’t
. Honestly, Amelia, I’m really sick; there’s no way I’ll be able to.’

I was totally confused. ‘You said you weren’t that bad!’

Lauren made a choking noise. ‘I . . . It’s . . . Oh, you don’t understand!’

‘No, I don’t understand because you keep saying different stuff. Are you ill or not?’

‘I’m too ill to come into school tomorrow,’ she said in a tight voice. ‘I’m sorry I’ll miss drama.’

But she didn’t sound sorry. She sounded angry. Well, I was angry too; I felt like she wasn’t telling me everything. ‘Lauren, what’s going on?’ I asked. ‘Is
this because of your fight with Milly?’

‘No!’

‘Is there some reason you don’t want to come into school? Because everybody feels like they’d rather be lazing around at home sometimes, but—’

‘Is that what you think? That I’m just lazy?’

I hadn’t meant that at all and now she was cross with me again. Something inside me snapped like a brittle twig.

‘I don’t know!’ I shouted. ‘I don’t know what to think because you won’t tell me anything!’

‘Think whatever you want to, Amelia.’

And she hung up.

I blinked hard. My hands were shaking.

I’d been walking all the time I’d been talking and I was already quite far from school. I didn’t backtrack to see if Ella and Chloe were still waiting for me at the school
gates; instead, I stormed home by myself. The other two didn’t arrive for another fifteen minutes.

‘You could’ve told us you weren’t walking with us,’ Chloe said when she found me in the kitchen. ‘We waited ages for you.’

‘So?’ I snapped.

‘So it’s not very polite.’

‘Your face isn’t very polite.’

‘Sorry, is this better?’ And she pushed her nose into a piggy snout and stuck out her tongue.

‘Do you have to be such an immature, blob-headed moron?’

Ella stepped between us. ‘It’s just that we weren’t sure whether we should keep waiting,’ she said. ‘We were a bit worried.’

‘You’re always worried, Ella. I can’t be held responsible for that.’

Chloe would have snapped back at me, but Ella just turned away. As she did, I saw her face pucker like she was about to cry.

I stomped upstairs and threw myself on my bed. I was so angry inside that I wanted to be able to lash out at someone. I was trying to find reasons to be mad at Chloe and Ella, but really I had
to admit that they hadn’t done anything wrong. I knew I was taking my bad mood out on them.

I breathed hard and clenched my fists. I was so annoyed. Mostly with myself. I thought I’d decided not to be the mean big sister any more and here I was saying horrible things to sweet
little Ella. The point about deciding to behave well is that it takes more than just good intentions. It’s really easy to think that you’re going to be a better person, but then you get
into the heat of the moment and it’s actually quite hard to control your feelings. I sighed. I couldn’t go back to being the stroppy one now. Things were all weird with Lauren, but for
once I was determined that I wasn’t going to spread my bad feelings all over my family. I was going to be considerate.

I took a few deep breaths and went back downstairs.

‘I’m sorry I shouted at you, Ella,’ I said.

She looked startled. I suppose she hasn’t heard me say sorry very much. ‘That’s all right.’

Chloe looked at me. ‘And I’m sorry I called you names,’ I said to her.

‘Apology accepted, gorilla-breath,’ she said.

It’s funny how there are a lot of different ways to call people names and some of them are OK and some are not.

Chloe filled the kettle at the sink. ‘Do you want a cup of tea, poop-for-brains?’

I let her get away with that one.

Lauren wasn’t in school the next day and she didn’t call me either. Which was fine because I didn’t want to speak to her anyway. Since I’d decided I
wasn’t going to be a misery guts who upset her family any more, I didn’t tell Mum or Chloe or anyone about falling out with Lauren; instead, I focused on being helpful and not grumpy.
So when Mum got back from school I volunteered to make tea while she had a bath. I was halfway through when I heard Lucy squealing in the sitting room.

‘Quick! Quick! Come and look!’ she shouted.

That’s the sort of thing she says when she’s taken off a plaster or found a hairball the size of a melon under the sofa, but I put down the knife I was using and stuck my head into
the sitting room just in case it was actually something interesting for once. Lucy was pointing at the TV and Chloe was standing frozen in front of it. On the screen was a boy’s wide,
grinning face. Thunder.

It was a local news feature on the new youth squad and how they hoped they were training the stars of future Rugby World Cups. It only lasted thirty seconds, but Thunder did get to say that he
thought the coaching at the club was ‘awesome’.

‘You didn’t tell us Thunder was going to be on the telly,’ I said to Chloe.

‘I didn’t know,’ she said in a tight voice. ‘I didn’t know because he didn’t tell me and he didn’t tell me because he’s the worst friend in the
world.’ She clenched her jaw and her fists.

‘Or maybe he was afraid to tell you because he knew you’d look like that,’ I said. I hoped she wasn’t going to start punching things because somehow, whenever one of my
sisters starts trashing the place, it’s me that gets the blame because I’m the oldest. Like that means I can keep any of them in check.

‘Or maybe he forgot about it,’ Lucy said. ‘Maybe he had other things in his head. He does spend lots of time talking about what’s for tea. I forget about stuff when
I’m thinking about important things. Like sweets or turning into a dinosaur.’

Chloe wasn’t listening. ‘I can’t believe it. Thunder gets to do everything. He gets to be on the squad and on TV. I’m better at rugby than him! I’d be better on TV
as well.’

I actually felt sorry for Chloe; it did seem really unfair. ‘You totally would,’ I agreed. ‘Your whole face could fit on the screen and, unlike Thunder, your nose looks nothing
like a potato.’

She twitched out of her trance.

‘Yours is more like a carrot,’ I went on.

She gave a half-smile. ‘Yeah, well, at least I haven’t got cauliflower ears like you.’

‘No, you just smell like Brussels sprouts.’

Then she twisted my arm behind my back and I knew I’d managed to cheer her up.

‘What are you going to say to Thunder?’ I asked, shaking her off.

She flexed her muscles. ‘I’ll just let my fists do the talking.’

I was pretty sure that she was mostly joking. ‘Seriously though, don’t fall out with him. You two have only just got things sorted out after you said you didn’t want to go out
with him.’

‘I know and after he stopped all that nonsense we agreed that we were going to stay as best friends. Friends are supposed to tell each other things.’

‘It
is
quite hard to tell people things when you know they’re going to be cross,’ Lucy said. ‘Like when the arm popped off that old doll of Mum’s. I
didn’t want to say because she’d shout at me.’

Chloe and I looked at each other.

‘Lucy!’ Chloe said. ‘You broke Annabella and didn’t tell anyone?’

Lucy stared calmly back at us. ‘That’s what I’m saying. I didn’t tell so Mum wouldn’t be cross with me.’

‘When did this happen?’ I asked.

‘Last week.’

‘You mean Mum’s got no idea that her most precious thing from when she was little has lost an arm?’ Chloe demanded.

Lucy nodded.

‘You’d better show me,’ I said to Lucy. ‘And if I can’t fix it then you’re going to have to confess.’

Lucy scowled, but we made her tiptoe upstairs so Mum wouldn’t hear us from the bathroom. She showed us where she’d hidden poor Annabella under her bed. I managed to squeeze her
little plastic arm into its socket and then I snuck into Mum’s bedroom and quickly put her back in her box in Mum’s wardrobe, before Mum got out of the bath.

‘No more touching Annabella till you’re twenty-five,’ I said to Lucy.

Lucy tutted. ‘I’ll be practically dead by then.’

‘Good. Maybe you’ll be too weak to break her again.’

‘I think you’d better go and tidy the Pit to make up for what you’ve done,’ Chloe said to Lucy.

My mum still calls our basement room the playroom but the rest of us call it the Pit because it’s always such a mess in there with books and toys all over the floor and all the furniture
that’s too shabby to be anywhere else in the house. Actually, during half-term, Lucy had completely tidied and redecorated the whole room because she had this crazy idea that Dad, Suvi and
Kirsti could live there. It was really sad to realise that Lucy wants to live with Kirsti so much that she was prepared to spend hours tidying up all that mess. Obviously, Mum and Dad had to
explain that Kirsti wouldn’t be coming to live with us and, in the weeks since that happened, the creeping tide of tiny plastic toys has already washed back over the floor of the Pit.

‘Good idea,’ I said to Chloe. ‘Having to sort out Sylvanian shoes from Lego pieces and My Little Pony brushes is enough to drive anyone to good behaviour.’

We went back into the kitchen and Chloe helped me finish making the chilli.

‘I could understand him not wanting to tell me bad news,’ she said while crunching on a piece of red pepper.

‘Are we back to Thunder?’ I asked.

‘Yes. Bad news I understand, but you’d think he’d want to share good news with me, like being on TV.’

I searched in the drawer for the tin-opener. ‘But, if he had, what would you’ve said?’

‘I’d have said, “That’s really unfair. I’m better at rugby than you and I ought to be the one on TV.” ’

‘Hmm.’

‘But then I might’ve been able to say, “I saw you on TV and your voice only squeaked a little bit when you were talking to the interviewer.” ’

‘He’ll be sorry to have missed out on such high praise.’

Chloe shook her head. ‘Friends are supposed to share things.’

She had a good point. I stirred a tin of tomatoes into the pot and wondered why Lauren didn’t seem to want to share things with me any more.

‘Maybe you should talk to him about it?’ I suggested.

‘Oh, I will. This is all he’s going to hear about tomorrow.’

Maybe I should take my own advice and talk to Lauren. I missed her. But she was the one who was being unreasonable. She should be calling me. I pushed thoughts about my best friend out of my
head and went back to the chilli.

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