Stripped Down (33 page)

“Damn it, she’s right.” Dad pushed himself up a little straighter in his chair. “You get this damn twinkle in your eye whenever his name is mentioned. It’s cute. I’m still going to have to give him the talk though. I’ll lull him into a false sense of security with my gracious thank-you before I go all Floyd Mayweather Junior on his ass.”

“Dad.” I laughed quietly.

“Seriously, Cass-Cass. If he makes you happy, then good for you. He’s fantastic with CiCi, and I only saw them together for an hour. It doesn’t hurt he calls me sir.” He waggled his eyebrows.

“He is great with her. But, now, I need to go and speak to him about those damn bills.”

“That’s great, but I have a question before you do that.”

“What?”

“When’s he coming for dinner so I can interrogate him?”

I was shaking as I pushed the door to The Landing Strip open. I could hear Mia, West, and Beck laughing at something inside.

The moment I’d left my parents’ house and gotten away from my dad’s joking about the entire situation, the enormity of what Beck had done had sunk in. He’d paid off months upon months upon months of my father’s medical bills. Ones my mom had only ever dreamed of being able to pay off. Ones I’d taken money out of my savings to help toward. It was part of the reason why I hadn’t been able to save enough to leave Vegas. Making sure a few payments were made toward Dad’s medical care had been more important.

They were big bills. Six figures. More than we’d ever have been able to pay off, even with his pathetic excuse for insurance—that cost its own ovary and a half to keep.

I was so many things as the door closed behind me. Lost, confused, elated, angry, helpless... I was a mishmash of emotion, a swirling mass of feelings I couldn’t make heads or tails of. I didn’t even think they had a head or a tail or a start and an end. There was sure as hell no discernible middle for any of them.

I just...felt.

“Cassie?” Mia was the first to notice me. “Are you all right?”

I chewed on my bottom lip and shuffled farther into the club. I was a little dizzy, almost like I was swimming.

Beck got up and came to me. He gently touched his hands to my upper arms and met my eyes. “Cassie. Are you okay?”

I swallowed and licked my lips. “You paid his bills?” It had come out a weak, rough whisper. So quiet that it took me a minute to be sure he’d heard me.

“We need to talk,” Beck said to West and Mia. He wrapped one arm around my shoulders and led me through to the back of the club.

Neither of us said a word as we moved down the hall to where his office was. I didn’t seem to be shaking as hard anymore, so I guessed there was that. Although I’d probably start again soon.

Beck opened his office door and guided me in. I stepped away from him as I took several deep breaths and tried to compose myself. I was so confused over it all. None of it made sense.

He shut the door behind him and then stuck his hands in his pockets. He did that when he felt vulnerable, I’d noticed. “When did they find out?”

“Yesterday. Mom went to pay some of the balance and they told her you’d done it.” I wrapped my arms around my waist and looked at him. “Why did you do it?”

He leaned back against the door. “Because I could. That’s the bottom line, Blondie. I could, so I did. I liked him the moment I met him. Your mom too. I could see how much he meant to all of you. Making your lives easier was something I was, and am, happy to do.”

“You didn’t have to do that.”

“No, you’re right. I didn’t. But I did.” He pushed off the door and pulled his hands out of his pockets. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I didn’t know how I was supposed to say it without you thinking I was pitying you or trying to convince you to be with me. I didn’t want you to feel like you had to because I’d done it.”

“When did you do it?” I was finding my voice again. “Before or after you’d decided not to file the papers?”

Guilt flashed in his eyes. “After.”

“After you’d met them?”

He nodded once.

I ran my fingers through my hair and looked away from him. “That was so much money, Beck. So much.”

“I know. But I don’t need that money. I own my house and I own my car. We own these buildings outright. It was just...there. I could make a difference to your lives, and I wanted to do that.”

I swiped at my cheeks before the tears could trail down fully and turned. “There are charities for that, you know? Don’t think I’m not grateful. I am. I’m just pointing it out.”

“I know.” His lips pulled to one side. “But, if I had given them the money instead, I wouldn’t get to see you smile like I’d just given you the universe. And maybe that’s selfish of me, but shit, Cassie. I want to give you the universe, but I can’t. This is the next best thing.”

“You’re completely crazy,” I whispered, putting my hand to my throat. “You know that?”

He nodded. “You’ve said that a few times. But I also did it because I know you hate Vegas and you want to leave.”

I breathed in deeply. “How?”

“Mia told me. She told me you’ve been saving for it as hard as you could, but sometimes, you had to take money out of it to make the payments.”

“When did she tell you that?”

“A few days ago. She was worried one of us would make a rash decision. So I guess, like West told you about the papers, she told me about your secret. I didn’t tell you I knew because I wanted to try to give you a reason to stay.” He paused. “But then I also wanted to give you a reason to go. Because, now, you don’t have to worry about your dad. I also paid up the estimated costs for the next three months. If you want to leave, you can leave.”

“I don’t want to leave,” I said quietly. “I haven’t for a few days now. You did more than give me a reason to stay, Beck. You
became
my reason to stay. I don’t want to be anywhere else other than with you.”

He met my gaze. Vulnerability shone out of his eyes. “Don’t just say it, Cassie.”

“I’m not. If I wanted to leave, would I have let you talk to CiCi the other morning? No. I would have interrupted you. I wouldn’t have let it go as far as it did. I would have stopped everything before I even knew this. I mean it. I don’t want to live somewhere you’re not. I mean, sure, I still have doubts, but—”

“Tell me them. Now.” He walked around the desk and stopped right in front of me. “Right here. Tell me what you’re worried about.”

“You can’t buy this solution, Beck.”

“I don’t care. We can fix it anyway.”

“Okay, fine. We’ve been trying to pay those bills for ages. The more we tried, the bigger they got.” I tucked my hair behind my ear. “Yet you could just do it in one go and not even notice it gone. Doesn’t that make it even more obvious, the difference between us? I can’t bring anything to this relationship except for an excitable six-year-old with a considerable pony, princess, and stuffed toy collection. And I know right now you say that it doesn’t matter, but what if one day it does?”

“Okay. Cassie, baby.” Beck tenderly took my face in his hands, the way he always did when he was about to hit me with something I needed to hear.

My skin tingled at his touch, and I found my fingers making their way to his shirt to hold on to him. Just in case.

“What someone can or can’t bring to a relationship doesn’t determine their worth. Only their heart can do that. I don’t care if you’re not rich or if the most valuable thing you can bring is a collection of kid’s toys, because you’re bringing something better. You’re bringing you, and you’re worth more than anything you can put a price on. Your heart is worth more than anything I could ever buy. If you fall in love with someone because they can bring things into your life that aren’t themselves, you’re doing it wrong. I’m in love with you because of the selfless happiness you and CiCi bring me. Not because of what you do or don’t own. I have enough material stuff for the both of us and then some, but all of that means nothing if I don’t have you to share it with.”

My heart thumped thunderously loudly. I could barely breathe, even as his words echoed in my mind and danced across my skin with sweet delight.

“I love you for who you are, Cassie. Even if you don’t love me right back right now, that isn’t going to change. I can’t make it change, but I know one thing. I might always love you, and that’s the one thing nobody can put a price on. So, next time you tell me you can’t bring anything to my life, look in the mirror. You’re bringing me you, and that’s more important than anything else.”

I gripped his shirt in my hands. The fabric was too tight to wind around my fingers like I wanted to, but I buried my face in his chest. Beck firmly kissed the top of my head, slowly dropping his arms to circle my body and hold me close against him.

Mom’s words whispered at the back of my mind.
“It doesn’t matter how you came together. What matters is how you stay together.”

If we could stay together like this, that wouldn’t be bad.

“You’re already my wife,” he said in a low voice into my hair. “Everything I own is already yours, but I don’t need any of that. I just need—”

I moved back and kissed him before he could finish that sentence. In that second, I couldn’t speak, but I could kiss him. So I did. I kissed him like my life depended on it. Like the touch of his lips against mine was all that mattered in the world. I kissed him like he was the center of my universe.

I kissed him until I could no longer breathe and my need for air finally overrode my need for him.

“I love you, Beckett Cruz,” I said quietly, peering up at him. “I mean, sure, you’re a bit of a pain, and I’m a little mad at you a lot of the time, but you’re also the best man I know, and I’m selfish too, so I’m going to keep you.”

“What, like I’m a pet?” He raised one eyebrow, but the happiness that curved his lips couldn’t have been hidden.

“Exactly like a pet,” I teased him. “And I’ll even wash your underwear.”

“Halle-fucking-lujah.” He kissed me quickly. “And, in return, I promise you endless orgasms.”

“Washing underwear for orgasms? That’s a payment system I’m on board with.”

“Good,” he said, letting me go. “Because I’m going to kick everyone out and start right now .”

EIGHT MONTHS LATER

“T
his is ridiculous.” Cassie paced the length of the front room, her hands tightly clasped in front of her stomach. Her blond hair bounced off her shoulders with each step she took, and her soft, pink lips were drawn into a thin line.

“Blondie, sit down. You’re makin’ me dizzy.”

“I can’t sit down, Beckett. Time passes slower when you’re sitting down.”

“That depends if you’re watching a crazy lady walk up and down the living room or not.” I got up and moved in front of her. My hands found their way to her shoulders where I lightly squeezed. “Time will not go faster just because you’re doing something. Go and get a glass of water or something and sit down. By the time you’ve done it, it’ll be done.”

She looked at me with her big, brown eyes. “I’m two weeks late. I’ve been late once in my entire life, and do you know what happened? I was growing a person inside my uterus.
Excuse me
if I’m not calm.”

I ran my hands down her arms. My actions belied my own nerves. I was sick to my fucking stomach. It was too damn early for this, but she insisted it had to be the first pee of a day.

It’s fucking pee. If they want to charge fifteen bucks for a single damn pregnancy test, they should be able to tell her if she’s pregnant or not from
my
pee.

Fifteen bucks to piss on a stick. Unreal.

I took Cassie’s hands and lifted them between us. After she and Ciara had moved in, I’d gone and bought her a real wedding ring. Now, that diamond glinted at me as I swallowed back my nerves and did my best to calm her.

“Cassie, baby,” I said quietly, searching her gaze with mine. “If you’re pregnant, you’re pregnant. But you’ve been stressed with your dad’s operation. That’s always a possibility.”

“How do you know stress delays periods?”

I shrugged. “I can use Google.”

“Why did you even Google?”

“Because the trash can wasn’t overflowing with stringy wrappers when it should have been.”