STRONGER (17 page)

“To the Empire State Building, and step on it!” Nate said, pulling me into the backseat with him.

I barely had a chance to pull the door shut behind me when the cab took off, throwing me into Nate’s lap. I squealed, trying to right myself, while he laughed and held me tight. It was the ride of my life, the taxi driver yanking the cab in and out of lanes, jockeying for the best position to reach our destination.

We were at the Empire State Building in no time flat. I didn’t see what Nate paid the man, but I bet he received a hefty tip.

I grabbed Nate’s hand as we ascended the elevator, watching the floor numbers fly by. How could we be going up so fast? At one point, my ears popped.

The view from the top was astounding—everything I wished for it to be. We got to the observation deck just as the shadows were lengthening, the setting sun decorating the skyscrapers in gold leaf.

“How about them apples?” Nate asked, grinning at me. “Look at our Big Apple, Jasmine.”

“She sure cleans up nice,” I agreed.

Nate tried to wipe his eye discreetly, but I caught him in the act.

“Look who’s the mushy one now,” I teased, thinking back upon my copious weeping at “The Lion King.”

“I think we can blame the muse,” Nate said, elbowing me in the ribs.

“I think we can blame New York,” I retorted, hugging him at the waist. “This is beautiful and so special. I’ll never forget this day for the rest of my life. I’m glad you shared it with me.”

Nate turned in my arms and cradled my face in both of his hands. It was simply the most natural thing to do when I tipped my jaw up, closed my eyes, and kissed him.

“I love New York,” Nate murmured, stroking my jaw line and kissing me again.

Chapter Eight

After our romantic adventure in the city, the muse seized Nate very hard, indeed. He started working feverishly, closing himself in the office. I heard typing when I pressed me ear to the door at all hours. He seemed exhausted when he did emerge from the room to eat something.

“Please rest,” I would say, smoothing my hand over the muscles of his arm.

“I’m a slave to the muse, Jasmine,” he’d say, his face ashen as he dotted tiny kisses along my cheekbones.

He seemed eager, almost desperate to work, so I didn’t push him. We maintained our usual routine—me cleaning and cooking and taking care of the house and him writing. The evenings we reserved for a walk around East Village, or going out to eat, or a romantic dinner at home. Once in a blue moon, we’d do something else to “check off” the list.

I smiled, remembering those trips as I was wrapping up cataloging all the books in the office. It was hard to believe I was nearly finished with that task. I still kicked Nate out of there in the afternoons so I could clean and organize. He started taking the laptop to the couch and typing in there, an unceasing tapping rhythm that sounded driven by relentless inspiration. I couldn’t wait to read it.

We’d built another bookshelf in the office, attaching the boards directly to the wall, and it looked like I was going to be able to fit every single book in there. No more teetering towers.

Last weekend, we “crossed off” Central Park.

“Of course, you can never really cross Central Park off the list,” Nate told me as we sat in the grass with ice cream cones.

“Yes you can,” I teased, nibbling at the strawberry-flavored sugary confection. “Grass, trees, blah, blah, blah. If you’ve seen it once, you’ve seen it all.”

Nate dotted my nose with his chocolate cone, ignoring my cry of outrage.

“You should ideally be coming here once a week,” he said. “At least several times every season. This place changes with the weather, changes with the time of day. It’s the green heart of the city. You can’t have New York without Central Park.”

He kissed my nose, cleaning off the ice cream, then trailed downward and kissed me lightly on the lips. I deepened it, savoring the melding of our ice cream flavors in our mouths. Chocolate strawberries. Delicious.

Life was so good.

I lived to please Nate and I didn’t care who knew about it. I felt that everything that had happened in my life somehow led to him—that he was my reward for all of the trials and tribulations I’d undergone.

If I was being completely honest with myself, I’d go through everything again—Jack, Mama, and Jeff and Brenda’s rejection—if I knew that, in the end, I could be with Nate.

The way he rubbed his thumb over my knuckles when we were holding hands during a movie, or rested his chin on the top of my head like that day on the ferry to the Statue of Liberty. He never pushed me to do things I was uncomfortable with and I never felt pressured. In fact, each one of his kisses erased a little more of the hurt I’d suffered in what felt like my past lives, reincarnations and reinventions of myself that grew more and more terrible until, at last, I’d reached Nate. It felt like nirvana with him.

I was never more positive that everything was going to turn out okay.

I put a book by an author with the last name of “Zusak” on the shelf and reached back down to the stack for the next one absent-mindedly. When my groping fingers didn’t find one, I looked down. There were no more. Stunned, I gazed around the room. It was done. All of the books were organized by genre and arranged alphabetically by the author’s last name. The futon was clear of books, the window was unobstructed, and the desk only had a cup filled with pens and pencils on its surface.

The office was now the place where I knew Nate could write successfully without getting distracted by the clutter.

I pulled open the door, practically skipping with joy at my accomplishment.

“Nate!” I called gleefully. “Come see! The office is done!”

He walked down the hallway, carrying his laptop. Looking in the office, he laughed, clearly as delighted as I was.

“It actually looks like somewhere I want to spend time in,” he said, ogling the perfectly placed books. “Thank you so much for having the patience to do this.”

He cradled the laptop with one arm and rested his other hand on my waist, kissing me softly on the lips.

“You know,” he remarked, breaking the kiss suddenly, “this is perfect timing, really.”

He walked to the desk and set the laptop down on the clean surface. Pulling up the document I could only assume contained the book he was working so hard on, he hit “return” a couple of times.

I leaned over his shoulder to watch what he was doing.

“The end,” he murmured, saying each word as he typed it.

I blinked a couple of times before realizing the magnitude of the moment.

“You finished your novel!” I whooped, jumping up and down and clapping my hands.

Nate laughed triumphantly, taking me up in his arms and twirling me around. The thing he’d been working so hard on—completed. I was so excited for him.

“I’m going to go to the publisher’s right now,” he said, saving and closing the document before removing a thumb drive from the side of the laptop.

“Today?” I asked. “But it’s already 4 o’clock.”

“The office will still be open,” Nate said. “They don’t close until 6.” He jammed the miniscule drive into his pocket, patting it several times to make sure it was really there. Nate was sporting about a two days’ worth growth of stubble on his cheeks and chin and his hair was flying in all different directions. Deep circles of exhaustion lined his eyes, but his eyes glittered with a strange energy.

“At least take a shower,” I said, putting my hands on my hips.

“No time,” he said quickly, kissing the top of my head as he walked out of the room. “I’ll wash my face real quick, though.”

I shook my head, grinning. He’d really done it. Nate had written a novel.

“Figure out what you want to do to celebrate,” he said, rushing back up the hall. “This is a special night!”

I heard the jingle of car keys and the door slam. I had to smile at his little boy eagerness. Shouldn’t he be the one to decide how to celebrate? It was his accomplishment, after all.

So, what to do? We could go to the movies, see an evening show, find something else to “cross off” the list, go out to eat in one of the finer restaurants in the area. The options were endless.

I thought of about three specific things and decided to let Nate pick. That was how we made most of our decisions. One of us would narrow it down and the other would pick from those choices.

It was, however, Thursday. I’d been so long in the office that I hadn’t completed my other chores. I hauled the vacuum out of the hall closet and plugged it in. The rug in front of the fireplace got a good vacuuming, as well as the large rug in the bedroom. I always took care to make sure I got every last particle.

The chore was done in no time. I replaced the vacuum cleaner in the closet.

I walked down the hall and to the bathroom. If we were going to do something special tonight, I definitely wanted to look special. There was a new dress hanging in my closet that I wanted to surprise Nate with. Flicking on the light, I laughed outright. In Nate’s rush to please me and get out the door, he’d left the faucet running and the medicine cabinet open. Several bottles spilled out.

I tightened the tap and picked up the bottles. They were all prescriptions with long, complex names that I had no hope of pronouncing correctly. Frowning, I shook the bottles to hear the pills inside rattle. I’d been living here all this time and had no idea Nate took medication for anything. I liked to keep all my medicine in the bedroom.

I studied the bottle I was holding, comparing it to the others cramming the cabinet. There were so many. This one was called “Actiq.” The only other information on the bottle warned about the medication’s side effects—sleepiness, nausea, and dizziness.

I replaced the bottle on the shelf and closed the cabinet door, studying my reflection in the mirrored surface. Why would Nate never mention any of these medications? How had I never seen him taking them?

There had to be an explanation.

I padded back into the office and opened the laptop. Opening Safari, I directed the browser to Google.

“A-c-t-i-q,” I muttered, punching each letter in with my pointer fingers. I hit “return” at the exact moment the door opened.

“I’m back,” Nate said from the other room.

I slammed the laptop shut, feeling like I was doing something wrong. Why did I have to be so suspicious of a few bottles of medicine? Hopping out of the desk chair, I went out in the hallway to meet him.

“Well?” I asked. “What’d they say?”

I paused and stared at him. Nate looked downright haggard. I found myself wondering when he’d last slept. For the past few nights, he’d been typing when I went to bed. I woke up several times to hear him still at it.

Nate smiled, but it failed to brighten up his face, which was an alarming shade of gray.

“They really liked it,” he said. “They’re going to give it a close read. I’ll hear back soon.”

“That’s wonderful,” I said, hugging him.

“Jasmine, I was wondering,” he said, pulling back a little. “I kind of rushed all the way over there and the heat sort of got to me. Would you be upset if maybe we just had a small celebration here tonight instead of going out?”

Exhaustion dulled his usually bright eyes.

“Of course,” I said, standing on my toes to kiss him on the nose. “You’ve been working too hard. Why don’t you take a relaxing shower while I make some dinner?”

“Sounds great,” Nate said, pecking me on the lips. He dragged himself down the hallway and closed the bathroom door.

Poor guy. I checked the thermostat and set it for a few degrees cooler than we usually kept it. Perhaps the cool air would help refresh him after he got out of the shower.

I walked to the kitchen and surveyed the refrigerator. It was late in the week, but I was always careful to plan my meals for the rest of the days when shopping on Mondays.

I settled on a gazpacho filled with fresh tomatoes, peppers, corn, and other vegetables to start off with. I chopped the vegetables and added dashes of garlic and other spices to flavor the chilled soup. Once everything was processed, I put it in the refrigerator. That would really help Nate cool down.

Next I pulled a pair of chicken breasts from the fridge and cut pockets into the meat. I stuffed the pockets with basil, cheese, and some of the tomatoes I’d set aside. I popped those in the oven to roast.

While that was cooking, I cleaned and cut some asparagus to sauté and made garlic bread with the last of a baguette. A light kiss on the neck made me shiver and turn.

“This smells amazing,” Nate said, smiling and freshly shaved. He looked so much better, his hair combed and cleaned up. He was dressed in a loose pair of jeans and a blue button-down shirt open at the neck.

“Oh no,” I moaned, “now I’m underdressed.” I was wearing the yoga pants and loose T-shirt I usually sported while doing chores around the house.

“I can watch everything in the kitchen if you want to go change,” Nate suggested.

“Everything’s on a timer,” I called over my shoulder.