Such Sweet Sorrow (32 page)

Wyn waited for half an hour for a nurse to appear from the room they’d carried Diana into. Dr John came and went, and although Wyn called out to him, it was as much as the doctor could do to acknowledge him curtly before going on his way. The sister walked down the corridor and went into the room, staying for only a few minutes before emerging with a nurse and returning to the main ward.

Unable to bear the suspense any longer, Wyn swung himself up on to his crutches for the first time without help; balancing precariously he stumbled down the corridor towards the sister’s office. The door was open and she was sitting at her desk, a cup of tea at her elbow and an enormous pile of forms in front of her.

‘How is Miss Powell, sister?’ he asked apprehensively.

She looked up and stared coolly at him as he propped himself against the doorway. ‘You’re doing well, Mr Rees. Won’t be long before you’re racing around, at this rate of recovery.’

‘Miss Powell?’ he repeated.

‘She’ll be fine.’ She looked away from him and continued to write on the document in front of her.

‘What’s wrong with her?’ he pressed, irritated by her offhand manner.

‘Not a great deal that time won’t cure, but then, Mr Rees, I should imagine you’re in a better position to know that than anyone else.’

A door opened behind him and he turned to see Dr John walking back into the ward. Manoeuvring quickly, he blocked the doctor’s path.

‘Can I see Diana, please, Dr John?’

‘Five minutes, then I’m taking her home,’ the old man barked, gruffly. He hated situations like this, finding them embarrassing for everyone concerned.

Wyn swung his crutches around and limped back down the corridor. The worst was opening the cubicle door: turning the knob wasn’t a problem, stepping back far enough for the door not to hit him was. Eventually he entered to see Diana propped up on a couch, a cup of tea in her hand and a blanket covering her legs.

‘You all right?’ he asked.

‘Yes.’

‘You don’t look it. You’re as white as a sheet.’ He limped over and propped himself against the side of the couch.

‘All that talk earlier about whether you want me to stay or not was pointless. Very soon I won’t be able to work for anyone.’ She gazed at him with wretched eyes. He was the one person who knew all her secrets, and she saw no point in keeping this one from him. ‘I’m going to have a baby.’

‘Tony’s?’

She nodded dumbly, sending tears splashing down on to the blanket.

‘I wasn’t much to start with, I’m even less now, but if you’re prepared to take on a crippled queer as a husband, the offer of marriage still stands.’

‘Didn’t you hear what I just said? I’m carrying Tony’s baby.’

‘I prefer to think of it as your baby, and if you marry me, it would be ours.’

‘You’d take on another man’s child?’

‘I love kids. That’s why I like working in the sweet shop. They’re mercenary little sods, but unlike adults they’re open and honest about what they want.’

‘But if I married you, it would be for all the wrong reasons.’

‘So, I’m asking you for all the wrong reasons. A cripple needs a wife to take care of him, and marrying you would make my father happy and guarantee me a half-share in his estate. What do you say, Diana? This could be a classic marriage of convenience, but I’ll lay a pound to a penny neither of us will ever regret it.’ Putting all his weight on one crutch he offered her his hand. ‘Partners?’

‘And when the baby’s born?’

‘It would be ours, yours and mine. I rather like the idea of being a father.’

‘You promise to treat it as your own?’

‘If you promise never to tell anyone it isn’t mine. Especially Tony.’

‘And if he guesses?’

‘Tell him he guessed wrong.’

She looked him in the eye. ‘Partners,’ she echoed, taking his hand into hers.

‘I can’t believe Tina let me leave the café this early.’

‘I think your sister is really nice.’

‘Which only goes to prove you don’t know her. Where do you want to go?’

‘A walk. I love the spring, and it seems to have finally arrived.’

‘It’s too cold for walking, and it’s getting dark.’

‘You’re too used to working in warm cafés. A bit of fresh air will do you good. Put roses in your cheeks.’

‘There’s enough roses there already.’

‘I could take you to another café.’

‘And give money to the opposition? No fear.’

‘There’s nothing else open on a Sunday except the churches.’

‘I could make you supper in the High Street café,’ Gina suggested as they crossed the Tumble.

‘What about your father?’

‘I keep telling you he won’t find out. Besides, he’s too furious with Tina for chasing after William to worry about anything I’m doing. Come on, I have the keys.’

‘Does Tina know you have them?’

‘Of course. Otherwise how could I open up the Tumble in the morning?’

‘Then she’ll guess where we’ve gone.’

‘What if she does? I’ve no intention of doing anything wrong. Have you?’

He turned the colour of beetroot as she opened the door of the café and went inside. He followed her and she closed the door and pulled the blackout. Walking into the kitchen she switched on the light.

‘Instead of supper you could kiss me again like you did on the mountain,’ she prompted boldly.

Heart pounding like a piston in a steam engine, Luke leaned forward and touched his lips to hers.

‘Now we’re alone, I think we can do a little better than that.’ Wrapping her arms around his neck she pulled him close to her and kissed him soundly, if a little clumsily, on the lips.

He drew back reeling from a heady combination of Evening in Paris that Gina had filched from Tina’s handbag, and the warm sensation of her body pressed against his.

‘Toast?’ she asked.

‘Yes, please.’ Taking off his suit jacket he hung it on the back of one of the chairs. Under the pretext of adjusting his tie he surreptitiously loosened his collar. Embarrassment had sent his temperature soaring.

Gina lit the gas. ‘I could make beans on toast?’

‘Between what I get at the Powells, the tea in the café, and what you make me, I’m putting on weight.’

‘You can afford to. Are they all as skinny as you at home?’

‘It’s working in the fields that does it,’ he said solemnly.

‘You don’t like me teasing you, do you?’ She waited until he sat on a stool before walking towards him. Linking her hands behind his neck she kissed him again. He pushed her gently away, holding her at arm’s length.

‘Kissing isn’t a dangerous occupation,’ she said pertly as his colour continued to heighten beneath her steady gaze. ‘My sister does it all the time when William’s around.’

‘They’re engaged.’

‘They did it before they got engaged as well.’

‘But we shouldn’t be behaving like this, not when we’re alone without anyone knowing where we are. I feel guilty every time we come here.’

‘I don’t see why. It’s not a sin to want to be alone together once in a while.’

‘Your father wouldn’t like it.’

‘What the eye doesn’t see, the mind won’t grieve.’

Wrapping her arms around his neck she pressed her nose against his and looked into his eyes. ‘Tell you what, you give me one proper kiss, and in return I’ll make us a meal, then we’ll go.’

This time as his lips touched hers, all his qualms about being alone with her and about the surroundings receded from his mind. He reached up, burying his fingers in her hair, fusing the length of her body to his.

‘I said just one kiss.’ Suddenly afraid of his mounting passion and the situation her innocent flirting had landed them in, she retreated behind the counter.

‘I’m sorry,’ he faltered. ‘I don’t know what came over me …’

‘It will be a long time before I ask you to kiss me again.’

‘I didn’t mean to get carried away.’

‘I know,’ she relented. She chose a saucepan and put it down again.

‘Perhaps I should take you straight home?’

‘That might be a good idea.’ She picked up her coat.

‘This won’t make a difference, will it? To us, I mean?’

‘That depends on how you behave in future.’

‘I promise –’

‘No …’ she interrupted as they walked out through the door. ‘No promises.’ She reached for his hand. ‘You’ll only break them when we get married.’

‘I heard a car.’

‘Dr John brought me home.’ Diana pulled off her tarn and dropped her handbag into a corner. She was glad to find her mother alone. She checked the time. Evan and Phyllis would soon be back from Alma’s. Steeling herself for an outburst she said as casually as she could, ‘Wyn Rees has asked me to marry him.’

Her mother dropped her knitting on to her lap. ‘And what did you tell him?’

‘I said I would.’

‘Diana …’

‘I know all about his reputation, if that’s what you’re going to tell me.’

‘Do you think you could be happy with him?’

‘Happier than I could be with anyone else. We’re good friends.’

‘There’s a lot more to marriage than friendship.’

‘I know and so does Wyn. There’s already a baby on the way.’

‘And Wyn’s the father?’

‘He’s promised to take care of both of us,’ Diana answered, neatly evading the question.

‘Don’t marry him just to give the baby a name, Diana. You know I would never let you go to the unmarrieds’ ward in the workhouse. Neither would your Uncle Evan if it came to that …’

‘It doesn’t need to come to anything, Mam. As soon as it can be arranged, I’m marrying Wyn.’

‘It’s what you want?’ The words were commonplace, but there was a wealth of pleading in Megan’s eyes that Diana found hard to ignore.

‘There’s no one else I’ll marry.’

‘In that case there’s nothing for me to do except wish you and Wyn well.’ Megan would have liked to ask a lot more questions, but the years she’d spent in prison had estranged her from her daughter, damaging their once close, loving relationship. She longed to rebuild it, but she knew enough to tread carefully. If things were going to return to what they had been, it would take time, but for now Diana had retreated not only from her, but from everyone in the family. If Wyn had broken through Diana’s reserve enough to want to marry her, and she him, who was she to stop them?

‘He’s coming out of hospital tomorrow. I’m going to his house after work so we can tell his father and sister.’

‘About the wedding or the baby?’

‘Both,’ Diana replied shortly. ‘I can’t stand the thought of anyone gossiping behind my back. I’d rather it was out in the open so the scandalmongers have nothing to talk about.’

Megan left her chair, and hugged her.

‘Tell Uncle Evan, Phyllis and Beth for me?’ Diana avoided looking into her mother’s eyes.

‘Wouldn’t you rather tell them yourself?’

‘I won’t have time. I want to go to bed now, and I’ll be in Wyn’s tomorrow night. If Wyn can get a special licence we hope to be married next weekend.’

‘In the Registry Office?’

‘It seems more appropriate than a church under the circumstances.’ Diana went to the door.

‘Just tell me one thing?’

‘Yes, Mam.’ Diana looked back.

‘If I’d been here, if I hadn’t gone to prison and been able to keep our home going, would it have been any different for you?’

Diana thought back to Ben Springer, remembered the cold welcome Evan’s wife Elizabeth had given her when she’d returned from Cardiff Infirmary, the lack of money that had driven her to take the job with Ben.

‘No, Mam,’ she lied stoutly. ‘No it wouldn’t.’

‘Time I was going.’

‘You’re a real nag.’ Gina looked up at the stars shining down on Danycoedcae Road.

‘Tina will have closed the café by now and I think you should be in bed before she gets home.’

‘Yes, Papa.’ She pecked Luke’s cheek before crossing the road to the white cross that gleamed on her garden wall.

‘I wish I could take you home with me to introduce you to my family,’ he said, as he walked with her.

‘Do you think they’ll like me?’

‘My mother, brothers and sisters will. I’m not too sure about my father. Not that he wouldn’t like you as a person, but he’s a very strict Quaker.’

‘And like Papa with me, he’ll expect you to marry into his own faith. Well that’s going to make for one very disappointed Catholic and one very disappointed Quaker. What say you we get married in the Salvation Army Citadel?’

‘Are you serious?’

‘Of course not, silly.’ She wrapped her fingers around his arm: ‘but then, we haven’t got to worry about religion until our wedding, and that isn’t going to be for ages yet.’

‘What do you think is the right age?’

‘Eighteen for me, twenty for you.’

‘We could get married on my twenty-first birthday.’ He was thinking more of the opposition he was likely to encounter from his father than any romantic connotations.

‘If my father agrees, but I’m sure he will, because by then we will have been going out together for two years. I’m glad you’re not joining the army. The thought of you leaving Pontypridd makes me understand why Tina is so miserable these days.’

‘I’m probably here until the end of the war.’

‘You’ll leave Ponty when the war ends?’ she asked, aghast at the thought.

‘I wouldn’t if the pit was prepared to keep me on. I’ve no job to go back to in Cornwall.’

‘I’d hate it if you left.’

‘So would I. When I’ve saved some money we’ll get engaged,’ he promised recklessly, trying to work out how long it would take him to save enough for a ring, given that half of his wages went in lodgings, a quarter in postal orders which he sent back home, and so far the remainder had been swallowed up by replacing his clothes, and buying cups of tea in the café.

‘I’ll have to wait a while before I spring that on my father, but in the meantime we have a whole lot of courting to do, and I don’t know about you, but I’m looking forward to it.’ She squeezed his fingers lightly.

‘And you’ve really forgiven me for what happened earlier?’

‘I’m thinking about it.’

‘I’m sorry …’

‘Don’t be. I’d better go inside. Goodnight.’

‘I love you,’ he whispered as she opened her front door.