Summer by the Sea (39 page)

Her mom reached over and grabbed a green foil-wrapped present off the table and handed it to Nan. “This is from me,” she said. Nan sat down at the table and set it in her lap. With unsteady hands, she slipped her finger under the fold and tore open one end. Then, she pulled out the gift. It was a silver frame. “I want Jake or Scott to take a photo of us girls before we leave tonight. Then we can put it in the frame for you.”

“Thank you. It’s gorgeous.” Nan pulled the stand open on the backboard of the frame and set it on the table. She reached over and grabbed a blue gift with white polka dots and a white ribbon.

“That’s from me… And Isabella and Scott,” Casey said with a smile.

Nan grinned in return and opened the present. She held it up so everyone could see it. It was a figurine of an angel. Nan collected angels. She put them out on her mantle every Christmas.

“It’s beautiful,” she said, turning it around in her hands before setting it next to the frame.

As she reached for Faith’s silver present, Faith thought about the significance of it. In life, seconds became minutes and minutes became hours and so on, but they needed all of it together to make any sense. Nan had mentioned how, when she was older, Faith would look back on her life and the things that worried her now wouldn’t seem so big. They’d be like seconds on a clock, Faith thought to herself. Nan had opened the gift. She held up the crystal clock with silver hands that Faith had kept in her bag all week tied up with that white ribbon. The clock represented time—time Nan had spent over her ninety years making a life, and oh, what a life she’d made. Faith could only hope to have a life like Nan had lived, and maybe, if she was lucky, she’d find herself at a beach house at ninety surrounded by her family.

“This is perfect, Faith,” Nan said. “Thank you. It’ll go by my bedside.”

Her mom pulled out the cake server that she’d dutifully packed from home and brought with her, and began cutting the cake and serving it onto paper plates.

“I’d like to thank you all for making this the best birthday ever,” Nan said. “It has been a very long time since I’ve had such a perfect gift as this: everyone together. I am so thankful to have been witness to that.” Nan stood, walked over to Jake, and grabbed his bicep, looking up at him in a very odd way. She stood with him for a moment without speaking, looking every one of them in the eye. It was very dramatic, and Faith wondered what was going on. Faith could feel the confusion showing on her face despite her attempts to smooth it out. What was Nan going to say about Jake?

“What you all don’t know is that I have a present for all of you.” Nan waited, her face animated, her eyebrows pushed up and a grin on her face. Nan was clearly making this dramatic on purpose. What in the world would she have to give them that involved Jake? “I’ve been working for a long time with Jake Buchanan,” she said. “This cottage is not a rental. It’s mine. I own it.”

There was a collective gasp as they all looked at one another. In that moment, like a flash, Faith’s reality changed. She envisioned big, family vacations with everyone there. Isabella growing up, building sandcastles, a picnic table at the edge of the dunes just like it had been when they were kids. And memories. Lots and lots of memories. She felt the prickle of the news on her arms, and the sting of tears in her eyes.

“When the original cottage was destroyed, I sat on the land, not wanting to get rid of such a gorgeous piece of property. I never told anyone I still had it. I knew that I couldn’t take care of it, but I did know that you all could. If you don’t want it, I’ll sell it. Jake can help me do that. But if you do want it, it’s yours. I’m willing it to Martha, but under the condition that we all take care of it. It belongs to our family. You can’t leave it for her alone to take care of. Understood?” Nan looked back and forth between Casey and Faith. They agreed.

Everyone started talking at once, their questions and comments turning to laugher and giddy excitement. Faith caught Nan’s eye. She was clearly enjoying it all. This was as much a gift for her as it was a gift for her family. Nan loved having everyone together.

Faith leaned over to Jake and quietly whispered under the chatter, “You knew about this the whole time?”

“If I’d have told you, your nan would’ve killed me,” he laughed. And she laughed with him, knowing exactly what he meant.

“Now that the cat’s out of the bag, I can tell you that I got you a present,” Jake said, turning back toward the group and smiling at Nan. “It’s out on the porch. Can I help you walk out to see it?”

Nan nodded, grabbing Jake’s arm. The rest of the family followed, and they all collected on the porch facing the beach. Sitting on the floorboards was a brand new wooden bench swing and a pile of chain. It was very much like the porch swing at the old cottage. “I made it myself,” he said. “You’ll have to show me where you want me to hang it.”

For the second time, Faith felt the sting of tears, and she blinked to keep them at bay. Isabella would swing on that swing as she grew up, just like Faith had done. What an amazingly sweet gesture for Jake to have made that for the cottage. She remembered mentioning it to him over dinner, but she never would have expected that he’d have taken the time to build one for them. She wanted to put her arms around him and hug him.

Jake promised to hang it before he left, and, as everyone went back inside to escape the heat, Casey gently grabbed Faith’s arm to hold her back. It was clear that she had something to say, and when Nan noticed, being the last in, she shut the door behind her, leaving the two girls outside.

“I can’t believe this is ours,” Casey said, looking out at the beach. Faith stood beside her, the wonder of it settling in her throat. She was so happy to be able to call this beautiful place hers. But she knew there was something else Casey wanted to say; she could read her sister enough to tell, so she waited. “I’m so sorry,” Casey said, turning to her, her skin flushed with remorse. “I’m sorry I hurt you all those years ago. It has always weighed heavily on me, and so I didn’t push when you wanted to stay away because until now, I didn’t have the guts to say what I’m saying.”

While Faith was very happy to hear this from Casey, she realized something at that moment: Casey, who had always seemed so confident to Faith, was actually a lot like her. Casey used her confidence to hide her insecurities. What Faith now understood from Casey’s apology was that Faith wasn’t necessarily the weaker one; they were both weak in ways. Faith looked up to Casey for her outward strength while Casey needed her sister in times of crisis. Together, they were strong.

Faith shook her head. “It was really silly to have avoided you for so long over that. It makes absolutely no sense to me now.”

“I’ve missed you so much.”

“I’ve missed you too.”

“Thank you for helping me with Scott. I couldn’t have done it without you.” Casey peeked in to the cottage and smiled at her husband through the window. He was laughing at something Nan was saying.

“You’re welcome.” Faith had never felt more confident. In all the years she and Casey had spent together at this beach, it had taken until now before Faith truly understood her sister. “This is a wonderful beginning, getting this cottage,” she said. “It’ll be a place where we can always be together.” She put her arm around her sister.

They’d spent all evening with Nan, chatting and taking photos, and finally, Isabella, unable to keep her eyes open any longer, asked if she could go to bed. Scott took her to her room and, when he didn’t return, Casey went and checked on him. He’d fallen asleep next to his daughter. Casey decided that she, too, was ready for bed, and she joined her little family for the night. Nan was dozing in the chair, and Mom, having just finished cleaning everything up—she never let anyone help her—called out to Faith and Jake on the porch to tell them she was heading to bed as well, leaving them alone.

Jake had come outside to test out the swing he’d hung earlier for Nan. He didn’t need to test it, though, because Faith had been swinging on it for a while already and it was perfectly secure. He sat down next to her, and they were so close that, to be comfortable, he put his arm around her, along the back of the swing. She let her feet dangle, as he pushed them gently back and forth. Even though he hadn’t done anything to prompt it, she put her head on his shoulder.

Faith wished they could spend many nights just like this. But then the truth of the situation set in: She was leaving tomorrow. She may never see him again, even though she hoped he’d keep in touch and, at the very least stop by when she visited the cottage. But would he? Would their two weeks together fade away in his memory eventually? A sense of urgency washed over her. But what could she do? He hadn’t said a thing. Did he have any thoughts on the subject of her leaving at all?

“I go home tomorrow,” she said finally.

“I know.” He was very quiet, not his usual self.

What else could she say?
Say something!
she wanted to yell out. The more she sat there, the more she wondered if he wasn’t saying anything because he didn’t have anything to say. Jake had given her signs that her feelings weren’t one-sided—those looks he gave her, the way he smiled at her, the softness of his voice compared to the way he spoke to other people, the times he’d kissed her. It all meant something, right?

“Do you care?” she asked, mustering all her inner strength and sitting up to face him. She spread her hands out on her thighs to keep them from trembling.

He turned to her, his face distorted in confusion. He looked almost offended.

“Do you care that I’m leaving?” She was taking a big chance here, because if he truly didn’t care then what would he say? She was putting him on the spot and she knew it, but if she didn’t, she’d never know. For once, she knew where she wanted her life to go, even if she didn't know how things would turn out. She didn’t know if Jake was someone she could be with long-term, but how would she ever get to that point if she didn’t take a risk and find out.

“I’ve thought about it, yes,” he said softly, not making eye contact.

She tried to hide the hurt. It wasn’t a grand gesture like she’d hoped.

She thought about Nan and what she’d said about those major moments not being as big when she looked back on them. No matter what happened tonight, she’d move on, her life would carry on, and years later, this moment would be but a memory. So, she decided it was time she got on with living her life. She wasn’t going home until she had answers.

Before she could say anything, he said, “Faith, you scare me to death. You are the person that I enjoy being around. I can’t stand being away from you. I tried. For the last two days, I wanted to see if I could stand being without you and it was the worst two days I’ve ever had. But when I married Rebecca, I envisioned this perfect life where I grew old with someone and had a family. I worked hard to build something with her and I thought I was doing everything right. But then, when we started seeing things differently regarding my work, she wasn’t happy anymore. She wasn’t the person I thought she was, and I should’ve seen it. I tried to build a life, and I hadn’t done it right.”

“What do you mean, ‘done it right’?”

“I know how to build things. That’s what I do. I can make magnificent structures, beginning with nothing but dirt. And I’m good at it. But when it comes to building a life with someone, being a husband, I’m clearly
not
good at it. I was just myself, and that wasn’t enough. When I got divorced, my life crumbled down around me, and I had to rebuild it. I’ve done that. I’ve done it in a way that makes me happy. But when I started talking to you, I could feel that foundation wobble. The very last thing I want is someone trying to change my mind about the life I’ve created.” He took a breath and shook his head.

“Do you know what you’re not good at?” she asked, taking another risk. She put her hands around his waist and turned him toward her until they were facing each other.

“What?” he asked, looking at her intently, yet his eyes so gentle that it almost took her breath away.

“You’re not good at trusting yourself. Yes. You’re good at building. But you’re great at being you. How do you know it was
you
? You just believed your ex-wife as if her word was definitive. What if it was
her
?”

He shook his head, clearly unsure.

“I have another question.”

He looked up at her.

“Do you like the Tides Wine Bar? Do you enjoy eating there? Honestly?”

He stared at her as if she were reading his mind. A wave of excitement sheeted over her when she realized she had. She could read him too. With a smile, she said, “You don’t like it, do you?”

“Rebecca was so excited about that restaurant. She couldn’t wait for it to be built. She said we needed something like that in the Outer Banks. So, when I wanted to impress you, I took you there, thinking that’s what kind of place a woman might want. She liked high-end places, flowers…”

She’d finally gotten to the truth, that it wasn’t about him loving those places, it was about him trying to prove himself after his ex-wife had left. “What if there’s someone out there who doesn’t even care if she gets a superficial bouquet of flowers because she just wants to be with you, whether you’re reading, sailing, or just having something to eat? What if your actions aren’t as important as you being there beside her?”