Authors: Bernard Schaffer
Frank Sr. picked up his coffee cup and sipped from it. “When you say it like that, it makes it sound like it was something weird.”
A plump, pleasant looking woman answered the door. “Good morning.”
“Good morning, Mrs. Erinnyes. How are you?”
“
Chief?” she called up the stairs.
A voice
boomed in reply, “Who is it?”
The stairs creaked as Erinnyes made his way down them, leaning on the handrail, his swollen ankles and veiny legs visible between his white tube socks and tan bathrobe. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to pick you up, boss.”
“Did I ask you to take me in today?”
“No, I just figured.”
“Who’s watching the other two if you’re here?”
“They’re in the station with orders not to leave.” Iolaus followed Erinnyes into his sitting room and said, “I’ve got them reviewing policies until I get back. My radio’s on. I’ll know if anything comes out.”
“I made you their supervisor so that things like this don’t happen, Jim.”
“Look, I’m sorry, sir. Since I’m here, do you need a ride, or are you good?”
The phone rang in the kitchen. Erinnyes leaned forward to listen when his wife picked it up. “It’s the surgeon, Chief. Do you want me to tell him you’ll call him back?” she said.
“No, I’ll be right there. We need to get this taken care of.”
“Are you okay? What’s wrong?” Iolaus said.
Erinnyes pushed him toward the door, “Get back to town and make sure those two idiots haven’t burned the station down to the ground.”
“Okay,” Iolaus said.
He took off his hat and headed for the car.
“Something’s wrong w/ the Chief,”
he typed into his phone.
“He needs an operation or something.”
“Oh yeah? Is he going to be okay?”
his wife replied.
“Not sure. I hope so.”
“Well, if he isn’t, I guess you’ll just have to take over then.”
“Ha ha. Guess so
! Do you know his wife calls him Chief?”
“Weird.”
“I know, right?”
He put the SUV into reverse and started to back down the driveway when he realized that Erinnyes was looking at him through the window. Iolaus lifted his hand to wave, but then the window was empty.
***
Both officers were sitting in the roll call room when he returned, reading the Use of Departmental Computers policy (All computers and electronic devices are the property of the police department. All activity can be monitored.)
and Uniform Policy. Aprille pointed to the section marked
Female Officers
and said, “At least I’m allowed to wear ‘nude nylons.’ Jealous?”
Iolaus drew a circle in the air with his finger and said, “All right, time to hit the street. You two follow me.” He told them to follow him over to his police car and opened his door. “Do you both see what that is?”
“I do, sir,” Reynaldo said. “The lightbar controls.”
“Do you see it, Office
r Macariah?”
“Are you serious right now?”
“I asked you a question.”
“I see it because you’re pointing at it and
Reynaldo just announced what it is.”
“It is the controls for your vehicle’s emergency lights. It is also the thing you will not be touching unless I give you clear, express permission to do so. You will not go over the speed limit to respond to a call. You will not use your siren. You will not activate your overhead lights. Am I clear?”
“Very clear, sir,” Reynaldo said.
“So we’re not going hot to any calls. No matter what?” Aprille said.
“That’s correct. Unless I give you permission.”
Aprille shrugged, “Okay. If you say so.”
“Now you’re getting it.”
***
Reynaldo Francisco drove through the shopping center, stopping his car to let every person on the sidewalk cross in front of him. “Hello, how are you?” he said. He smiled even when they did not respond.
He listened to the other police officers on the zone calling out traffic stops and responding to calls. So far, they’d had nothing.
Reynaldo parked his car in a parking space and unhooked his police microphone. “Seventeen-ten to seventeen-seven, come in please.”
His radio crackled with Iolaus’s voice, “Go ahead.”
“I’d like to do a foot patrol at the shopping center if that’s all right with you.”
“Permission
is granted.”
A chorus of clicks erupted on the radio with a crackling voice shouting “Douch
e bag!” in the background. The county dispatcher cut all of the other radios out and sternly said, “All units on the zone check your microphones.”
The air was quiet after that, until a final, defiant click sounded.
“Seventeen-nine, are you trying to reach County?” the dispatcher said.
Aprille answered her, “No, County. I was checking my microphone like you asked.”
Reynaldo got out of the car and put on his hat. He made sure his tie was straight and bloused his uniform shirt to keep it from sagging over his gunbelt. He passed a group of juveniles on the corner and said, “Hello, everyone.”
The kids just looked at him. He kept walking. He opened the door to the dry cleaners and walked in, standing at the counter until an Asian woman came out from behind a rack of bagged clothing. “Hello there,” he said.
“Is something wrong, Officer?”
“No, I just wanted to stop in and make sure everything was okay.”
There was alarm in her eyes, “Why wouldn’t there be? Is something going on?”
“No, I was just doing a foot patrol.”
“Oh…I don’t think cops do them around here.”
Reynaldo
nodded and waved his hand, “Have a nice day.” The woman leaned forward to watch him leave.
He walked into the post office where a long line of people
stood behind a nylon barricade, all of them holding packages and envelopes. Reynaldo went around the side to where one of the postal clerks was talking to an angry looking customer. The customer immediately turned to Reynaldo and said, “Oh, so he called the freaking cops? Real nice. First you rip me off and now you’re trying to get me arrested.”
The postal clerk looked over at
Reynaldo and said, “Nobody called anybody. I’ll be right with you in one moment, Officer.” He looked back at his computer and said, “Your package wasn’t delivered to Minneapolis until yesterday. It will arrive in California tomorrow.”
“Then why the hell did I pay so much money for overnight shipping?” The customer turned to
Reynaldo and said, “Officer, these people stole my money! Can’t you do something?”
“I’m not sure, sir. I only came in to check on how everyone was doing.”
“Everyone is tired of waiting for this dude to stop holding up the line,” someone called out from the back.
“Hey, back off!” the customer said. “It was my granddaughter’s birthday yesterday and her gifts never arrived. Now these people are telling me it won’t get there until tomorrow.”
“Listen, what they did in Minneapolis is out of my control, but I’ll go get the Postmaster and you can file a complaint with him. Okay?” the clerk said.
“Fine!” The customer turned to
Reynaldo and said, “Am I wrong here?”
“I don’t know, sir. I really don’t get involved with this.”
“Well I want you to stick around. I need a witness for this.”
Everyone was looking at him.
Reynaldo felt sweat dripping down his back inside of his bullet proof vest. It was tight against his chest and he was having trouble taking a full breath. “Actually, sir…I have to get back to my car. Good luck with your package. Take care everyone.”
He went through the doors and hurried back toward his car. “County to Seventeen-ten. You still on foot in the shopping center?”
“Yes.”
“A woman from the dry cleaners is calling in a suspicious male dressed as a police officer who came into her store. Can you stop by and talk to her?”
Reynaldo was about to respond when Iolaus’s voice cut him out, “Disregard that. I’ll handle it. Seventeen-ten, wait for me around the side of the building.”
Reynaldo
slumped into his patrol car and flung his hat across the seat. He picked up the microphone and said, “Understood, sir.”
***
Fifteen minutes later, Iolaus drove around the back of the shopping center and pulled up to Reynaldo’s car. “Did you identify yourself as a police officer to that woman in the dry cleaners?”
“I…I think so.”
“She said you didn’t.”
“But I was in the uniform and hat. I told her I was on a foot patrol.”
“She said you made her feel intimidated and refused to tell her why you were in her store.”
Reynaldo
shook his head, “That was not what happened. I just stopped in to say hello.”
“Say hello?” Iolaus eyed him for a minute, then leaned toward him through the window, “You got a thing for Oriental chicks?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean you think that now you’re some big shot in a police uniform it gives you the right to harass women. Specifically, Orientals.”
“Absolutely, completely not true. I just went in there to say hello, like I did at the Post Office.”
“This isn’t some dating service, and I don’t want any more complaints about you from women. You understand me?”
“Yes, Officer Iolaus.”
“Good. You gotta remember something, she’s not from here. Where she comes from, every cop’s an extortionist or rapist or conscript
ed child soldier or some shit. She thought you were coming in there to hurt her, probably.”
Reynaldo
raised his hand and said, “I swear on my mother, I was only trying to do my job. In New York, where my mother worked, the police stop by every day to check on the store and see if she was okay. She knew all of them by name.”
Iolaus shook his head sadly and said, “Those guys were just trying to bang her, buddy. Wise up. Anyway, this isn’t New York. Those people are animals up there. Worse than Philly even. They’ve got so many special units nobody knows how to wipe their ass. I’ve got a buddy who told me one cop sees a violation and calls it in, so a special unit comes to make the arrest. That unit calls somebody else to do the interview. Then some other goddamn special bullshit swoops in to take over the whole case and file charges. This, right here, what we’re doing, is more police work than any of those big city mopes will ever see because from start to finish, we do it all. You understand me? Now, I need you to go sit at the intersection of Smith and Beltran and monitor it for an hour. The township got a complaint about the lighting cycle and passed it along to the Chief.” Iolaus put his car in drive and said, “If you see any traffic violations call me and I will deal with them. The only thing I want you doing is counting cars.”
Reynaldo did not speak. He realized he was gripping the steering wheel so tightly it was starting to shake. The rubber casing was twisting until it split under his hands. He drove onto the street with the words of Jim Iolaus ringing in his ears about someone, anyone,
banging
his saintly madre.
***
“I wanted to kill him. Who the hell is he to say things like that?”
Aprille nodded as she listened, stirring two
maraschino cherries at the bottom of her glass of Sprite. “I’d have been pissed off too. You should have called him on it.”
Reynaldo
pushed away his half-finished beer and grunted in frustration, “People like him can say whatever they want to someone like me. Especially while I’m a probationary employee. What makes me mad is I become a police officer because it is respectable profession, and I want to protect people and help them. Instead, I count cars and cannot turn on my lights without permission.”
Aprille had stopped listening the moment
Reynaldo pushed his beer in front of her. She looked down into its rich, golden coloring. “You’re going to finish that, right?”
“No, I do not even want it.”
“You can’t waste it, Reynaldo.”
“You want it? You can have it.”
“No.”
“It’s good. Want me to get you one?” He raised his hand for the waitress.
“Put that down,” Aprille hissed. “I don’t want one.” She looked over to see if the waitress was still coming, but as she turned the restaurant’s front door opened. A pretty, professional-looking redhead walked in, laughing at something the man behind her said. Her companion came inside and looked up, seeing Aprille immediately. It was the devil himself.
Dez Dolos smiled in surprise from across the room and headed toward her. The redhead followed after him, asking where he was going. Dez slowed down, letting her stay close to him, but never making contact.
Close, but still far enough away to not reveal that they were probably fucking in his office every night after it closed,
Aprille thought.
Same old game.