Surrender to Love (7 page)

Robin bolted upright. “Are you all right, Mama?”

“Y-yeah. I’m just tired.”

She composed herself long enough to offer her daughter a butterfly smile. “Tell you what—why don’t you go get me the brush so I can take down your hair?”

Robin bounded out of bed with amazing speed. “Okay.” She ran into the bathroom and returned within the blink of an eye. “Here you go.”

Julia accepted the brush and scooted back on the bed to make room for Robin to sit down in front of her. When she was settled, Julia unbraided her daughter’s fat pony tails and removed her hair bows.

“Mama, how do you know if a boy likes you?” Robin asked out of the blue.

Julia stopped, the brush suspended in midstroke. Was it already time to have this talk? She cleared her heart from her throat before she asked, “What do you mean?”

“I don’t know.” Robin shrugged. “I met this boy today and…he seemed nice.”

“I see.” Julia digested the information, then tried to figure out the best way to approach the question. “Well, if I recall, when I was your age—and mind you that was a long time ago—the boys who picked on me and called me names were the ones who ended up liking me.” She guided the brush through Robin’s thick hair.

“Well, how do you know if you like them?”

Julia stopped again, stumped. “I’m not sure. You just know, I guess.”
Talk about irony
, she thought. A woman who had failed at two marriages was giving her daughter advice.

Robin fell silent.

Julia frowned. “Do you think you like this boy?”

“Nah,” Robin said with a wave of her hand. “I wasn’t asking for me.”

Relief deflated Julia’s anxieties.

“I was thinking about Bobbi. I think she likes this boy named Stanley. But I don’t think she knows it. And he does just like you say—he teases her and calls her Snobby Bobbi, so I think he likes her, too.”

“Are you playing Cupid or something?” Julia brushed her daughter’s hair in long, fluid strokes. Now that it wasn’t Robin they were discussing, she relaxed.

“No. I was just wondering if I was right.”

A thought suddenly occurred to her. “Have you ever liked someone—a boy?”

“Not really. Boys are dumb.”

Julia laughed as she French-braided Robin’s hair into two rows. “Why do you say that?”

Her daughter shrugged. “They just are.”

“All right,” she said, then kissed the top of Robin’s head. “In the bed, you.”

“’Night, Mama.” Robin delivered a quick peck to Julia’s cheek, then climbed into bed.

As Julia pulled the covers up, she noticed Robin’s wide smile.

“We forgot to call David today.”

Julia nodded, still unsure of what to do or say.

“But I’m glad we didn’t.”

Surprised, she stared at Robin. “Why do you say that?” Fear pricked along the column of her spinal cord at the very thought that David might have done anything inappropriate with her daughter. Why hadn’t she thought about that before now?

“You’re always happier when he’s not around,” Robin said simply.

Julia recognized the truth of Robin’s words and felt the rush of tears long before her vision blurred. “Good night, sweetheart,” she managed to say with an even voice. She kissed her daughter again and reached over to turn out the light.

Tony poked his head into Paul’s office and motioned for Paul to follow him. “I think we got something.”

Paul abruptly ended his phone conversation and bolted
from his desk. “Let me have it,” he said, marching down the hallway beside Tony.

“Channel Eight ran the Mercer’s picture at six and ten, and we received a few calls, but we have this one woman—a Mrs. Nancy Davis—who claims she knows David and his wife. However, she knows him as David
Lawson.”

“He’s married?”

Tony glanced down at his notes as they marched down the hallway. “Supposedly. According to her, Mercer was married to a Dr. Julia Kelley.”

L
ater that night, Julia slipped out into the garden without drawing any unwanted attention. She wanted a place where she could be alone with her thoughts, and the magnificent view spread out before her was as good a place as any.

For a while she strolled through the various perennials, admiring their beauty and their soft fragrances.

Then the tears came.

Somehow she made it to a nearby wooden bench, where she collapsed and hid her wet face in the palms of her hands. The plight of her situation hit her with full force. Everything was gone: her home, her marriage—her life.

“Oh, God,” she moaned in between choked sobs, while rocking her trembling body back and forth. What had she done to deserve this? What kind of life could she really provide for her daughter while being on the run?

No answers came to what she perceived as impossible questions. She didn’t even know how she was going to pay for the repairs on her car.

She didn’t want to take the risk of using any of the credit or bank cards that were in her purse. She knew those things could easily be traced.

A light breeze rustled the leaves of the surrounding trees, which was perhaps why she didn’t hear the approaching footsteps.

“Julia?”

She jumped to her feet with her heart lodged somewhere in her throat.

Carson stepped from out of the shadows. His handsome dark features had twisted into a look of concern. “Julia, are you all right?”

Nodding, she slapped a hand against her chest. “You frightened me,” she said, swallowing.

He gave her a long, evaluating look. “I heard you crying.”

“I-I’m fine.” She quickly dried her tears with the palms of her hands.

He watched her in silence.

“Really,” she assured him, sniffling. “I’m fine. I just came out here to have some time alone.”

Carson moved closer. “If it’s about the car—”

“No,” she nearly shouted.

The rest of the sentence died in his throat. He frowned at her.

“It’s okay,” she said, sliding her hands into the pockets of her pants. “I really appreciate all that you’re doing for us. It’s just been a hard couple of days. That’s all.”

“Is there anything else I can do for you?”

“I could really use some time alone,” she said honestly. She needed to think. Surely if she put her mind to it, she would come up with a plan for how she and her daughter were to live the rest of their lives.

He nodded, but disappointment flickered across his face.

“And thank you for taking care of Robin for me today. She obviously had a good time with you and your daughter.”

“She’s a joy to be around. I’m halfway hoping that she’ll be a good influence on Bobbi for the short time that you’re here.”

“Oh?”

“It’s not that Bobbi is any trouble, it’s just that she’s…she’s…” Carson scratched his head as he struggled for the right words.

Julia smiled despite herself. “There’s no need to explain. I’m sure she’s a lovely girl.”

He laughed. “She is. Every day she reminds me more of her mother. She was quite the tomboy when she was Bobbi’s age as well.”

“But she eventually grew out of it?”

“No.” His laughter deepened. “Everything was always a competition between us. I mean that in a good way. The sad truth of the matter was that Karen pretty much beat me in everything. That included fixing cars.”

“She sounds like quite a character.”

His laughter died as his smile waned a bit. “She was.”

Sadness crept over his chiseled features.

Gone was Julia’s desire to be left alone. She was suddenly assuaged by a growing feeling that this gentle giant needed someone to talk to. “Tell me about her.”

His usual smile reappeared, this time broader, and she swore his eyes shimmered with a thin sheen. “Karen was the love of my life,” he began with conviction. “She was the reason that I rose every morning. The reason for everything.” He paused, then moved over to the bench and sat down.

Julia did likewise.

He looked around the garden as if lost in memory. “Karen created this garden. She tended to each flower with skill and
love. I feel that love whenever I visit this place.” He cast a casual glance toward Julia. “Does that sound crazy?”

“Not at all.”

He nodded and pulled his gaze back to the surrounding flowers. “She always had a way with making things grow. Of course, everything that I touched had a way of turning brown and shriveling up.” He forced a laugh.

Julia smiled.

“You know, they say that it’s best to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. I don’t know if I agree with that.” He paused. “What about you?”

Julia blinked, caught off guard by the question. “I—I don’t know.”

“Enough about me pining over my deceased wife. Tell me something about you and your husband.”

She blinked. “What do you mean?”

Carson shrugged. “I don’t know. Are you two close?”

Uncomfortable with how the conversation had put her on the spot, she searched her brain for a way out of the question, but an answer tumbled from her lips before she had a chance to stop it. “Once.”

His brows arched inquiringly, but when she didn’t continue, he tried to smooth things over. “I had no right to pry.”

“No more than I did,” she answered honestly. “So let’s just call it even.”

For a brief moment they held each other’s gazes before allowing them to fall.

“Deal. Let’s shake on it.” He offered his hand.

She slid her hand into his large but surprisingly soft one.

“So.” He sighed dramatically. “What’s a safe subject?” he asked, gazing up at the stars.

Julia followed his lead and noticed for the first time that
they sat beneath a full moon. “Why do we have to talk about anything? We can just sit here and enjoy the stars.”

“Sounds good to me.” His gaze danced around the sky. “It’s a beautiful night.”

“That it is,” she agreed. “You know, I could never make out the constellations. They always look like a cluster of white dots.”

“Let’s see if I can help you out.” Carson moved closer and pointed at the sky. “Now, right there is the Big Dipper. Can you see it?”

She squinted and tried to follow the drawing he made with his finger. “N-no.”

“Are you sure?” He leaned closer.

Julia caught the faint scent of his cologne and thought the light musk suited him. Then just beyond the tip of his finger, an image suddenly materialized. “Wait. I think I see it,” she marveled.

“And over there is Orion, the Hunter. It’s the most conspicuous constellation. The Betelgeuse star is easily distinguishable by its reddish color.”

Julia again followed his direction and her eyes widened in surprise. “Why couldn’t I ever see those before? They look so obvious now.”

“I felt the same way before Karen showed me. Now I know all eighty-eight by heart.”

She heard the longing in his voice. “How long has it been?” she couldn’t help asking.

“It feels like a lifetime ago, but in reality it’s been a little over three years.”

The moonlight caused his eyes to shimmer, and Julia fought the urge to reach out to his pain-stricken face. This man loved his wife with his whole being, and the power of that love held her in thrall. Had she ever experienced that kind of love?

After two marriages, it shamed her to admit that she hadn’t. Yes, she had loved Kevin, Robin’s father, once upon a time,
but it was nothing even close to what she was witnessing. Kevin had come at a time in her life when she thought she was supposed to be married. She’d just finished medical school and all her friends were marrying. It seemed like the right thing to do.

But within a year, she came home to a note from Kevin saying that he could no longer be third in her life behind Robin and her career, and he just left—simple as that.

She couldn’t lie and say that there was no pain involved. There was plenty of that, but she wasn’t hurt as much as she was embarrassed. Robin had been the best thing that had resulted from the marriage. For that, she could never regret their union.

Then there was David.

Smooth-talking David had, at least in the beginning, made her feel all the things that Kevin hadn’t, but whether she had simply felt loved or if she had loved him was something that she still questioned.

“You’re not on your way to see your husband, are you?”

Julia jerked at the unexpected question. So lost was she in her own private thoughts that she had not noticed his intense gaze on her. How long had he been studying her?

He smiled. “I know we agreed not to pry, but…you’re not, are you?”

Her heart pounded inside of her ears, but again there was something in his eyes that assured her that she could trust him.

“No,” she admitted, shaking her head and refusing to tell him the whole truth.

“Are you running from him?”

She forced back the threat of tears and shook her head. She expected him to ask more questions, but he didn’t. The night’s silence cloaked them as their eyes met again.

To Carson, the moonlight made Julia look even more beau
tiful, if that was possible—and maybe fragile. Yes,
fragile
described her right now. She was running from something. He was willing to bet the farm on that. He’d felt a strong urge to protect her, and a few moments ago he had been overwhelmed with the desire to kiss her. The emotion confused him.

Just moments ago he was thinking of Karen, and now he wanted to kiss another woman.

He closed his eyes in shame.

“Maybe I should head back in,” he said, standing. “I have a full day tomorrow,” he offered as an explanation.

Julia blinked at his abruptness. The spell had been broken. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow, then?”

He nodded, hesitated, then turned toward the house.

“Thanks again.” Her words hit his back.

He stopped.

“I enjoyed your company tonight,” she added, surprised that she hadn’t really wanted him to go.

“Me, too,” he said, then continued toward the house.

She watched him until he faded from view, and breathed a shaky sigh of relief. In the future, it would be in her best interest to avoid being alone with Carson Webber, but she had a strange feeling that was easier said than done.