Surrender to Me (30 page)

She cupped his heavy testicles in her palm. They drew up as she dragged her tongue up his shaft and curled over the sensitive head again, giving him another gentle nip of her teeth.

“You feel so fucking good. Suck me dry.”

His command sent a thrill through her. The thought of giving him enough pleasure to completely empty him aroused her to a fever pitch. Her breasts hung heavy, ached. Her sex cramped with a hungry clench. She slipped a hand between her legs and fumbled for her clit.

Hunter dragged her hand away from her slick folds. “No, honey. Save that for me. That orgasm is mine to give you.”

She whimpered, but he merely took her wrists in his grasp and lifted them high above her head, restraining them against his chest in one powerful hand. He directed her mouth back to his waiting cock with the other.

Even as he denied her self-pleasure, blood rushed through her body, heart pumping. Hunter was becoming an addiction. Kata knew it, felt herself rushing headlong into the danger. Despite knowing she’d crash hard eventually, in that moment, she was willing to do anything to experience the ecstasy he could give her.

He filled her mouth, leaking more fluid. His urgent need ripped through her. She sucked harder, faster. His words slowly gave way to tortured groans. He hardened again and pulsed on her tongue. Desire clawed at her. She wanted this, needed to know that she could hurtle him into pleasure, as he did for her.

“Kata.” He barely got her name out between harsh breaths. “Now, honey.”

She moaned, nodded, sucking him deeper than ever before.

Seconds later, his every muscle tensed. He shouted and flooded her mouth with the salty taste of him, filling her ears with his long, guttural moan. She swallowed him, sucking him through his climax, electric pleasure jolting her simply because she’d pleased him. And she knew it when he looked at her moments later with soft blue eyes, gave her that tender stroke of fingers across her cheek.

“Thank you.”

Kata hadn’t just wanted to give him pleasure; she’d
needed
to earn his praise and tenderness, and still ached for his approval. In the past, she’d assumed that lovers would find their pleasure in her, just as she did with them. Hunter was different. Why?

“God, you’re incredible.” His raspy voice went straight to her heart. “I’m so glad you’re mine.”

His.
Yes, and she felt it down to her very core. Hearing his appreciation settled her anxiety, brought about a sense of peace that she didn’t quite understand. In one way, she felt cleansed, almost happy.

With a groan, Hunter sat back on the bed. Kata rested her head on his thigh, sighing when he filtered his hands through her hair in tender thanks.

Kata had never felt anything like this sweet bond. Tears sprang to her eyes again. God, she wanted to experience it again and again, would do anything to have it. Clean his house, bake him cakes, worship at his feet. Whatever he wanted.

How did that make her different than her mother?

The question zinged through her brain like a bullet. Her blood chilled. Kata jerked away, avoiding Hunter’s sudden quizzical stare.

Given her mother’s weakness for Gordon, the fact that she was willing to prostrate herself to earn Hunter’s pleasure and approval terrified her. After the way he’d handled Ben’s challenge and her defiance, she knew Hunter wasn’t like Gordon in the ways that mattered. But what if she was more like her mother than she imagined? What if she lost herself to her unbearably sexy, powerful husband and ceased being Kata, the snarky, independent probation officer, and merely became Kata the eager submissive?

For a decade, she’d despised that weakness inside her mother that allowed her to subjugate herself to the asshole she’d married. It devastated Kata to realize she carried the same weakness.

Suddenly, she could see herself as Hunter’s plaything, waiting, hoping—begging—him to bestow pleasure and admiration on her because she couldn’t do without them. After all, he’d dismantled her with a mere ten swats and a single touch to her pussy. How easily Hunter had taken her under, to a place where she didn’t recognize herself, to a world where she’d do anything to make him happy. Kata could too easily lose herself in this, in him.

“What’s running through your head, honey?” He reached out for her. When she scrambled away, he frowned. “Let’s talk.”

Kata tried to take a deep breath. Maybe she was overthinking this. Morgan didn’t seem lost to Jack. Then again, they were like some fairy-tale couple, totally happy in a way most spouses could only pray for. That wasn’t reality. The way she’d given herself over to Hunter so completely was. As was her terrible yearning to do it again.

She saw now that Hunter wouldn’t
take
her independence. He’d be hard, demanding. But to feel this staggering pleasure again, to please him, she would willingly give her soul away until there was nothing left.

Kata closed her eyes and sobbed.

HUNTER frowned at his overwrought wife. They’d been perfectly in sync, her submission so natural and freely given. He’d been so proud. Now he saw panic ripping across her face. She’d fallen hard into a post-scene plunge, where she felt stripped to the bone and emotion ruled.

Hunter gritted his teeth. She needed aftercare and reassurance—fast.

He approached, ignoring her when she scrambled away, and lifted her to the bed. “Lie back.” He settled her head on the pillow, rubbed a soothing hand over her shoulder. “Tell me what’s upsetting you.”

Kata refused to look at him.
Fuck.

Digging for patience, he curled his body around her own. She turned her back to him, sobbing harder. Shit, was this something more than a common emotional swell?

Hunter realized that he’d argued without listening much, mistake number one. He understood the urgency of her mother’s situation and should have told her so. God knew, she’d been under pressure and confused. But damn it, she hadn’t even tried to hear his perspective, hadn’t trusted his protection. The words necessary to describe his betrayal at seeing her on Ben’s lap, knowing she’d run to her fuck buddy for help before her husband, weren’t in his vocabulary.

With that spanking, Hunter had punished her. She’d submitted so beautifully. Now, after experiencing their stunning connection and tasting heaven, she was trying her best to put distance between them again.

“Honey. Don’t do this. You’ve got to tell me what’s wrong so we can work on it.”

Kata scrambled off the bed. “Where’s my purse?”

She scanned the room with haunted eyes. Worry slithered through him.

Damn, he should have known that if he was going to ask her to open up to him, the revelations couldn’t be one-sided. He had to open up as well and explain why her refusal to trust him with her feelings was unacceptable . . . and painful. Kata had to understand. He felt so fucking vulnerable, revealing his anguish to someone with the power to devastate him. But she deserved the truth, especially if he wanted the same. They’d have nothing without honesty.

“Honey, take a deep breath. I’ll find your purse. Then we’ll talk.”

She wouldn’t meet his stare.

Reining back his anxiety, Hunter prowled around the room until he found her little clutch. Reluctantly, he handed it to her. Kata tore it open. From inside, she withdrew a sheaf of papers and a pen, scrawled something across the last page, then thrust the crisp document at him with shaking hands. “Sign it.”

Trepidation tightened his gut. With one hand, he shook the papers open and found the only three words in creation that could have fear exploding in his belly—and him seeing red.

Chapter Fourteen

“
P
ETITION for divorce?” The blast of his voice echoed off the walls like thunder. Hunter crushed the paper in his hand. He swallowed, nostrils flaring.

Kata flinched.

“I—I don’t think I can do this for even another five minutes. We’re not going to be right together for a lifetime.”

“But you’re not willing to stick around and find out?” Hunter crowded in on her, his gaze locked on hers. “This. Will. Never. Happen.” He spoke slowly, clearly, every word avow. “We’re going to work this out, Kata. I won’t make my dad’s mistake and watch my wife walk out the door.”

She froze. His statement explained so much. He tried to hold emotion back, but sadness and rage bled from his expression. Kata’s heart caught as their gazes connected, hers silently asking what had happened.

“At the start of my senior year, my mother served my father with divorce papers so she could be with her lover. My dad did
nothing
to stop her.”

His father’s inaction had disturbed Hunter deeply, she could tell. “Maybe your dad didn’t love her anymore.”

Hunter’s laugh was grim and ugly. “He would have cut his heart out of his chest to have her back. I’m not making that mistake, Kata. I will fight to keep you until I stop breathing.”

That’s
why he’d refused to talk about his mother in Vegas. Now every line on his face was stamped with determination and pain. She had to fight the urge to wrap her arms around him and comfort him.

No wonder seeing her with Ben had been such a nasty shock for him. Hunter was possessive and protective to start with, but coupled with his mother leaving for a lover . . . Of course, when she’d told him that she wanted a divorce, she’d dredged up the pain of his past. She, of all people, understood how emotional issues from parents could bite one in the ass. Clearly, they had that in common. Her heart ached for him.

But that didn’t mean she could stay.

Hunter dropped his head, shoulders tight. “None of us ever saw her again. She was dead less than a year later.”

Kata gasped. Not only had the woman left, but she’d
died
? Another terrible blow to a young man still reeling from his parents’ divorce. “How?”

“The murderer snuck into her apartment, then raped and strangled her. She’d been living alone, had no one to protect her. To this day, the crime is unsolved.”

No wonder Hunter took the threat against his own wife so seriously. He knew firsthand what could happen.

“I’m sorry that you lost your mother to senseless violence. My father died of a heart attack when I was ten, so I empathize about losing a parent. I’m truly sorry for all you and your family have been through.” She took his hand, squeezed gently. “Hunter, I’m not her. I can’t replace her. And you’re not your father. You’ll be fine when I’m gone. Our marriage was a whim, so you’ll barely notice I’m gone.”

While Kata feared that Hunter had imprinted himself on her forever. Even so, she couldn’t stay and put either of them through the pain she knew would come.

“Bullsh—”

“Don’t try to make me stay. We’ll both just end up hurt.”

“Do these”—he gripped the papers—“have anything to do with Ben?”

Why didn’t he see that this whirlwind marriage just wasn’t meant to be permanent? She couldn’t be with someone who could not only make her give herself to him so completely, he demanded it. He was only clinging to her so hard because he didn’t want to have his father’s regrets. They didn’t make sense for the long haul . . . but he deserved her honesty.

“No, I really don’t love him. I am not leaving you for someone else. I’m just leaving so I can go back to my life.”

Hunter swallowed again, fists clenching at his sides. And for all that he looked furious and proud, his vulnerability was unmistakable. The fact that she wanted a divorce was killing him. Even though parting was the sane choice, guilt and anguish sliced her stomach like a machete.

“This is all crap. You want to leave because you submitted so totally that it scared you. I won’t let you run from us.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “I’m not signing those unless I’m convinced that you have no feelings for me.”

Frustration roiled inside her, and angry tears filled her eyes. “You can’t refuse to let me go. That wouldn’t make you any better than Gordon.”

Flinty eyes raked over her. “Do you honestly think I would ever degrade you until you lost your self-esteem?”

They’d already crossed this bridge. “No.”

“That I would fail to seek medical care for you when you needed it?”

“I know you wouldn’t,” she admitted softly. “You’ve spent a lot of time and effort trying to keep me alive.”

“So you think that I would take away your job and your friends to make you completely dependent on me?”

Kata glared up through the thick fringe of her lashes with furious eyes. “No. But to make you happy, I worry that I would let you do anything you wanted to me in bed . . . and eventually in life. I can’t respect myself like that. Please, just sign.”