Survival Paranoia (Survival series) (8 page)

Lorna was disgusted. The SUV was toast at this point, and there was no one to blame but herself for the mess they found themselves in. The day had started peacefully enough, with Max riding quietly in the backseat and playing with her toys. Lorna and Todd took turns driving. One manned the wheel while the other napped. They agreed that for the time being they were fine on supplies, and that didn’t even include what was packed in the bug-out bags in the rear of the SUV. Their main goal was searching for other survivors, hopefully ones set up in a safe place willing to take in three more people.

They argued about which direction to take, but Lorna suggested that north was t
he way to go. Bigger cities meant more people, and made the likelihood of finding a group higher than Todd’s suggestion that they check more rural areas. Since she was driving they headed north towards Wilmington. Their mistake became clear to her almost immediately.

They were fi
ne while traveling the highways. There was plenty of traffic, but swerving around the abandoned cars was pretty simple. The trouble came when they hit the interstate. Apparently a lot of people had decided the problem was surely just in Delaware, and they fled for the nearest states, north to Pennsylvania, or maybe further towards New York or even Massachusetts. However far they intended to run, many of them never made it. They saw gore like they hadn’t ever suspected could exist- bodies littered the interstate like a child’s dolls after a temper tantrum, blood painting the concrete like paint. Max was sleeping, so there was that one small blessing, but the two adults were awestruck by all the carnage.

Many zombies wandered loose, weaving between cars and stumbling like drunks leaving the bar after last call. A great deal more were trapped inside their vehicles, beating bloody hands uselessly on the windows.
Lorna was struck once again by the thought that their new lives were like something out of a really disgusting horror movie, something with a really large budget and amazing special effects. Again it crossed her mind that she was still in the institution, strapped to her cot and loaded with medication. It was all just a medical nightmare, and soon she’d wake slobbering and sobbing until they gave her another dose.

Grimly, she tightened her grip on the steering wheel and pressed on
. She wanted off the interstate, and wished she’d never decided to head this direction to begin with. But each turnoff they passed was loaded with wrecked cars and ravaged corpses, so she drove on and prayed they’d make it out of there.

She finally reached Wilmington, and her regret grew stronger. Todd had sat silently, and she was grateful he hadn’t felt the urge
to tell her that he’d told her so, or that he’d known this would happen. Indeed, he seemed to have been struck mute by the horrors they’d come across in the last three hours. But it didn’t prepare them for this, and she really wished she’d listened to Todd.

Wilmington never made much of a blip on the radar of the United States. Hell, Delaware was kind of a joke as far as states went. Beyond being the first to
ratify the constitution, nothing really stood out… unless someone had a sick child. The children’s hospital was big news, and well known by many, at least on the East Coast. So it should have dawned on them that Wilmington would not only be full of zombies, but that a large percentage of them would be children. It was enough to have Lorna biting the knuckles of one fist viciously, desperately trying to stifle a scream. If she started to rant and rave now, she likely wouldn’t stop.

Blind panic overcame her, and she took off from the horrors before her like a woman on a mission. The tires squealed, and the SUV shuddered as she jumped a curb in her hurry to turn down one winding street searching for the interstate once more so they could return south.

Vaguely she registered Todd’s shouts and curses, but it was like he was shouting at her from a tunnel… he was too far away to matter. The only important thing was escape. She sobbed, wiping furiously at the traitorous tears running down her face. She knew children weren’t immune. Kyle had been proof of that. Yet seeing so many at once, most of them in their bright-patterned hospital gowns, had tripped something in her mind that might be the one terrible thing that would finally push her over the edge.

She blew through the toll plaza, heading relentlessly back the way they’d come, like a dog with its tail between its legs. No o
ne would worry about fining her, after all. Hell, the people in charge of things like that were probably dead, anyway. The trip north had taken them almost three hours, when it should have taken only half that, but she kept her foot to the floor, driving maniacally back towards familiar sights. She needed the comfort of familiar surroundings, even if they were a distorted version of what she’d used to know.

Todd had given up shouting at her and now clutched the chicken stick, mumbling under his breath occasionally, or turning to say something comforting to Max, who was now wide awake and looking on with interest. She took the whole thing calmly, but she was only four, after all, and didn’t understand why Lorna drove like a mad woman.

They finally reached the end of the interstate. As they passed the air force base, Todd shouted something that finally broke through Lorna’s panic- “Holy shit, look out!” She swerved to avoid the group of zombies in BDU’s that were standing in the middle of the road, but it was too late. She clipped one with the right front fender, tipping the SUV on its side where it landed gracelessly in a ditch. Lorna saw stars and blinked them back, ignoring the blood dripping from her scalp where she’d smacked her head on the driver’s side window.

Todd was struggling to free himself from the seat belt, his full attention on the backseat. Lorna didn’t know if Max had been hurt, and guilt swarmed her briefly before fear s
et in. The SUV was useless now. They’d never be able to right it and move on. There were also zombies to worry about.
We’re fucked
, she thought with great regret as the first hand slammed onto the passenger window.

Todd took the wheel for the remainder of the day. Lorna was too frazzled to even consider driving at that point, and she started shaking just thinking about doing so anytime soon. She’d never been in an accident before, and a zombie apocalypse was the worst time she could think of to have her first.

If Todd had been a little slower or been seriously injured in the crash they would likely all be dead now. If the passenger window had shattered, they might not be alive. Instead, Todd had reacted swiftly when he realized the danger they were in. He lowered the power window, evading the grasping hand reaching for him. When Lorna realized his intent, she encouraged Max to get down on the floorboard and cover her head with a blanket. She wanted to keep the child from being covered in gore, but she also wanted to make sure she didn’t have to see any of it, either.

Todd grabbed the arm of the soldier reaching for him and tugged with all his strength. Like a gruesome doll, the arm came free, and he tossed it negligently back out the window, doing the same with the next arm that came through, and the next, and so on. Lorna watched him with a kind of dull horror, amazed by what he was able to do with just his bare hands. Bits of flesh and blackened blood rained past him and down onto her, but she ignored it.

When the arms finally stopped reaching inside, he popped his head out. She was terrified, and reached for him, cursing
her forgetfulness when the seatbelt pinned her firmly in place. Apparently the coast was clear as he climbed out the window with little effort. She could barely see out the windshield and the angle was wrong, but the sounds told her he was dispatching any undead near the overturned SUV. Less than five minutes after he’d gone outside, he peered in the window at her and gestured her to get out.

Lorna coaxed Max out from the backseat first. The little g
irl had a swollen lip, as she’d either hit it on something during the crash or bitten it, but otherwise she seemed fine. She pushed the girl up towards Rodd’s waiting hands before finally releasing the catch on her own seatbelt and climbing to freedom.

It looked much worse from the outside, and she sent up a prayer of thanks that they’d not been seriously injured due to her reckless driving. But their supplies were scattered around the hatch of the SUV and it would take precious minutes to recover everything, not to mention the need to move everything to another vehicle. Todd had apparently considered all of that, as he was already opening the hatch and gathering supplies. A mini-van sat nearby, and she could see the keys dangling from the ignition. Leaving Max with her father, she approached the driver’s side door and
opened it. The zombie was still sitting inside, seatbelt unlatched but apparently unsure how to get free of the steering wheel. She reached inside and tugged the woman out before stomping ruthlessly, over and over again, onto the woman’s head.

Neither of them spoke a word
until they were safely tucked into the van and the SUV wasn’t even visible in the rearview mirror. She huddled in the passenger seat, stealing occasional glimpses of Max in the back. The little girl was apparently unconcerned by their near miss. She’d fallen asleep mere moments after being strapped in the backseat. The van was a newer model with a TV in the back and a DVD player. A small plastic bag on the floorboard proved that young children were obviously part of the former family, and the comforting sounds of children’s programming would be a balm to their souls after these last months.

“I think we should talk,” Todd said quietly, and Lorna winced, ducking further into the seat and drawing her knees to her chest.
“What happened back there, well…”

Lorna cut him off. “God, I’m so freaking sorr
y, Todd. I don’t know what the hell came over me. The kids… it was all too much and I just panicked.” She was horrified to realize tears were pouring down her face, and she wiped her nose with the sleeve of the filthy sweatshirt she was wearing. She just couldn’t get warm, no matter how she tried. “If you want me to go, I’ll understand,” she whispered, miserable and sick at heart. “I just ask that you drop me someplace relatively safe, okay?”

Todd stopped the car on the highway. There was no traffic to concern themselves with, yet it still seemed odd to her. He turned to face her, wanting to give her his full attention. “You saved my daughter’s life, and my own as well,” he said solemnly. When she shrugged he nudged her shoulder, forcin
g her to look his way. “No, dammit, you listen. You returned her to me. You could have left her to die… I’m sure others would have. You could have taken her and not bothered to look for me, to find her home. Many more would have done that, assuming her family was dead. But you tried. She’s alive because of
you
,” he said, unbuckling his seatbelt. Frustrated, he fisted his hand in her hair and tugged her unresisting mouth to his. He kissed Lorna senseless, and she stared at him, lightly touching her swollen mouth. “You’re stuck with us, and you’re stuck with
me
, got it?”

The tone was teasing, but the warmth beneath it got through her shock. She nodded, mind racing. “But I nearly killed us,” she stammered out, knowing she had to say something. She needed to understand why he’d even want to stay with her at this point.

He shook his head before buckling his seatbelt once more and pulling back onto the highway. “You saved our lives more times than I can count, Lorna. Give yourself a break. You were on your own when all this shit started and you didn’t snap,” he said reasonably. “I haven’t asked you to tell your story,” he said, flicking his eyes in her direction briefly before looking back at the road once more. “Nor am I going to ask you now. Your story is your business. You can tell me sometime if you like, or keep it to yourself. What matters is going forward from here. But I do think we need a plan,” he said tiredly, taking one hand off the steering wheel long enough to brush back his thick brown hair. “Need a trim,” he muttered, and she grinned.

Sighing, Lorna turned her gaze towards the sweet little girl in the back of the van. She had her mouth open and was snoring lightly. The sound was pleasant, and Lorna couldn’t help but smile tenderly. “I had a boyfriend named Jeff, and he was convinced there would be a zombie apocalypse someday,” she began. And as Todd drove them towards the beach area once more, she filled him in on how she’d ended up where she found Max.

The next week was one spent riding in mind-numbing circles and avoiding other survivors.
Todd was the first to spot them. A Humvee, the sort the military used, was driving through their area.

“Hey, look,” he said, excitement
causing him to light up like a kid on Christmas morning. “There are other survivors, and they might even be military.” They were pulled over on the shoulder of the road eating their typical lunch, ravioli and potted meat out of tin cans, and trying to keep Max entertained. Currently she was bouncing around in the rear of the van singing along with one of the children’s DVDs, paying the adults no mind as she munched on her favorite foods. Occasionally she’d pause in the middle of singing to eat another bite of ravioli or to giggle and whisper to a doll she’d yet to part with since their travels began.

Lorna looked over her shoulder, ensuring that Max was fully involved with her backseat entertainment before placing a hand cautiously over Todd. Their relationship was still budding, Max providing an easy reason to keep some distance between the two of them for fear of her seeing something inappropriate. “Todd, we don’t know anything about the people in the Humvee,” she said softly, pitching her voice low enough that it wouldn’t carry to the back.

Todd had one hand on the steering wheel, the other poised on the key in the ignition. He frowned at her, puzzled and disturbed by her reluctance to meet up with anyone new. “Lorna, it’s the military,” he said carefully, as though she were a bit slow and wouldn’t understand him.

She shook her head, shaking her bangs from her face. Her hair had grown nearly unmanageable, and although she kept it pulled back in a ratty ponytail, her bangs weren’t long enough for that and constantly got in her way. She’d give a months’ worth of supplies for a hot shower and a pair of scissors, she though ruefully. “They
might
be the military,” she agreed, “or perhaps they’re just survivors like us. Do you want to risk your daughter’s life on who they might be?”

It was like a blow to his ego. “I take care of my daughter,” Todd shot back defensively. His shoulders were hunched, his body drawn in on itself as much as possible with the steering wheel in the way.

Lorna pressed on, knowing she was hurting him but desperate to do anything to keep them all safe. “Like when she took a midnight stroll?” Her heart broke as she watched his face pale, all color drained from him until the only thing saving him from looking like the zombies was the lack of grey in his skin tone. “I’m sorry,” she said, meaning every word, “but we can’t take those kinds of risks. What if they’re bad people? And even if they are the military, how do you think this shit all started? The dead didn’t just get bored and wake up on their own,” she said coldly.

Todd laughed, and it was a nasty sound. “Here we go with the conspiracy theories,” he said, rolling his eyes. “Please, tell me how big and bad our government is. I’m sure it’s as fascinating as UFOs and Big Foot.” His face was full of color now, flushed with anger.

Lorna merely stared at him a moment, stunned to realized how much that hurt her. Then again, she’d drawn first blood. He was merely fighting back. And the point was moot- the Humvee was now out of sight, not even close enough to hear it and pinpoint its direction. “It doesn’t matter if it’s true or not,” she said reasonably. “All that matters is staying safe, keeping Max safe. Beyond that, nothing else matters.”

Todd stared at her briefly before nodding in agreement. “Yes, I suppose that’s true. But don’t you want to find others? Don’t you want somewhere safe to go?” He gestured absently to the empty roads that surrounded them. “Don’t you want something more than life on the road?”

Lorna agreed. “Yes, that’s what I want for us all, but we won’t find that by hooking up with armed men in a Humvee that they may or may not be using legally,” she said, her tone calm now that the fight had blown over. “We can’t settle for the first group we run across. We need to find somewhere safe, observe them for a while, and then decide whether or not to throw our luck in with theirs.” She went back to eating her potted meat, unsurprised to find it tasted like sawdust after the disagreement the two of them had had. What if he’d gotten mad enough to kick her out? She’d grown attached, she admitted to herself, to both of them. She didn’t want to be alone again, and she didn’t want to be apart from them. They were becoming a family in this horrid world they’d found themselves trapped in, and she didn’t want to lose that when she’d so recently found it. It was too important, too special.

Their lunch finished, if not enjoyed, they got back on the road. They drove aimlessly for a bit, both of them silent as they brooded on the harsh
words they had exchanged. Max was huddled beneath a quilt, quiet in the back of the van as she hovered on the hazy edge of sleep.

“Lorna,” Todd said in a low voice. “Have you ever thought about leaving the state? We’ve been driving for weeks now without any real purpose. Maybe we’d do better if we headed somewhere different, somewhere unfamiliar.”

She shook her head. “That’s exactly why I don’t want to leave,” she replied. “I’d rather be where I know the area, where I feel safest and know the escape routes if need be. Even if we never find another survivor, at least we’re somewhere where we can feel safer. I think staying local is the way to go, at least for the time being.”

Todd was silent a bit, mulling it over. “Fine,” he agreed, “but it we don’t find any reason to stay within the next six months I’d like to branch out a bit, at least head to Maryland or Virginia, or maybe north to Pennsylvania. Deal?”

Lorna grinned at him, patting his arm. He was staying for her, and that healed her aching heart. “Yeah, it’s a deal,” she said.

They neared Milford once more before they found the high school. It was surrounded by chain-link fencing, obviously erected recently to turn the school into a safe haven. And there, on the lawn, sat the little princess table and chairs, its seats fil
led with dolls and stuffed toys… all except for one. The final seat contained a little girl close to Max’s age, playing happily on the grass, oblivious to the zombies beating at the fence.