Surviving the Pain (A Baby Saved Me Series Book 1) (24 page)

Sage
stared down at his world. It had been a week since the doctor said she’d be all right and she hadn’t woke yet. He was beginning to worry if she ever would come back to him. His heart was aching. As much as he didn’t want to leave them, Sage knew that if he was going to get them off their backs, he needed to at some point. All he wanted was some kind of sign letting him know that leaving was what he needed to do.

“Daddy,” came a soft, scratchy voice from behind him.

Sage whipped around and stared at his son. Hudson’s eyes were closed, and he still lay perfectly still. They’d removed the ventilator and all that about three weeks ago. They said it was up to him from then on out. The longer he watched, and nothing happened, Sage’s heart fell further to the floor.

“Daddy,” Hudson said and this time, Sage saw his mouth move as he did so.

Quickly, he moved to the bed, grabbed his son’s hand, kissing it. “I’m right here, buddy.” He choked out as his throat tightened in both unbelievable happiness and gut wrenching sadness at the same time.

Slowly, he watched in awe as his son opened his beautiful eyes. Blinking several times and groaning at the bright lights. He finally looked at Sage with a watery smile.

“Daddy, you have to save mommy,” he forced out with deep breaths.

“Save mommy?” Sage repeated unable to understand what Hudson was talking about. Surely he didn’t know that Ember lied in the bed next to him.

“Mean…” he took another deep breath. “…man was in here. I heard him.” He paused again.

Sage took this moment to stop him. “Hold on buddy. I want you to meet someone. They are helping us find out what happened to you. Okay? That way you only need to tell it once.”

Weakly, Hudson nodded his head and closed his eyes. Sage had made everyone leave the room so he could have a few moments of peace with his family. He had thought he’d be running out the door minutes later to end this shit once and for all. But things might be changing. Opening the door, he looked in shock as everyone was just standing on the other side. He figured they would have left.

Tears streamed down his face, and he couldn’t help the sad smile that tilted the corners of his mouth. “Hudson’s awake. I need you guys to remain calm and don’t overwhelm him. He called for me and told me I had to save mommy. He heard someone in the room. I only want him to have to do this once so please,
please
let him tell it all.”

When tears sprang to everyone’s eyes, and they all nodded mutely, he opened the door and moved quickly back to his son’s bed.

“Buddy, you know a lot of the people in the room. But let me introduce you to the ones you don’t, okay?”

“Okay,” he breathed, slowly opening his eyes.

Rufus stepped forward first. “This is my father, Rufus. He adopted me after I ran from the evil people that gave birth to me.”

“What… can… I call you?” He asked with what looked to be a little smile on his face. “Grandpa Dog?” And he pretends to bark using Rufus’ name before he started to cough.

“How about we go with GD for now until you’re stronger and then we’ll go from there?” Rufus leaned over and pressed a light kiss to his forehead. “I’m so glad I got to meet you finally. Your daddy has bragged about you and your mommy for so long.”

“I love you GD,” he croaked out and Sage’s heart swelled with pride at how loving his son was with no questions asked.

Rufus’ eyes filled with tears as he stepped back from the bed. This time, my sister stepped forward.

“This is my sister Kenzie. We call her Zee for short.”

“Hey little man,” Kenzie said with tears in her eyes.

“I’ll call you Auntie Kee. I already have an Aunt Zea.” He smiled.

“You can call me whatever you want. I’m always here for you too. Okay?”

Hudson nodded his head, and my brother Kyan stepped forward, holding out his hand. “I’m your dad’s brother. My name is Kyan, but they call me Ky.”

“Hmm, I think you should be called Kiki. Yeah!” he said as excitedly as he could manage.

“Kiki?” Ky scrunched his face. “Why Kiki?”

“Because daddy says that you fight like a girl,” he laughed softly followed by a coughing spell.

“How about we keep that for now, but when you’re all better your dad and I square off in the ring? Then decide who fights like a girl. Deal?”

“My dad will kick your butt.” He chuckled. “I watched him beat the Cyclops.”

Hanging his head in mock embarrassment. “You’re probably right. He’d probably mop the floor with me, huh?”

“Totally because he has me as a coach,” he grinned big up at Sage.

Leaning down, Sage pressed a kiss to Hudson’s head. Damn, he loved that boy more than anything. Sage had only known him for such a short period of time it seemed, and he believed him to be the greatest man that ever lived. Sage still wasn’t sure what good he did to deserve this, but whatever it was, he’d do it all over again.

“Hey, bud. My name is Creighton. I could tell you what they call me, but I think I want you to give me a nickname instead.” Cray smiled as he leaned down and kissed Hudson’s forehead.

“My dad’s your best friend. I heard you say that. You said you’d die for him if it kept him from feeling the pain you live with. Don’t do that, though, okay? We want you here. You can keep their nickname for now. I need to think about yours. Because Crabby is the only one I’m getting so far,” he grinned.

Cray laughed, and it was a beautiful sight to see and hear. He didn’t do it often, and they knew why, but he needed to forgive himself. Though Sage had never met his family, he knew they’d not want him suffering like this.

“Okay, buddy. Can you tell us all what you heard?”

Nodding his head, he looked around the room and said ‘hi’ to Everett, Kimberly, Aspen, Holden, and Bexley. When Sage felt Hudson squeeze his hand, he couldn’t stop the sob of relief that left his lungs. Hudson looked up at him, and he winked down at his son, urging him to continue.

“There was a mean man in here. I heard him talking, but I couldn’t open my eyes. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, buddy. You’ve been through a lot.”

“You’d gone out in the hall to talk to someone,” he said looking up at Sage. “He was talking to someone else. Hold on, I remember his name.” Hudson closed his eyes and squeezed them tightly shut. “He kept calling him ‘X’. The man on the phone called the man in the room,” his eyes were still closed as Sage assumed he tried to pull the memory up. “Tray, I think.”

Sage looked at his father, and they both nodded at the same time. It was Trainor as they expected. ‘X’ was Xavier from the Fox crew. For them to be working on their own, though, had a ton of questions racing inside Sage’s head. But he was soon pulled from them when he heard Hudson continue with what he heard.

“The ‘X’ guy asked him if he had the injection. And the other one said yes. They said taking her from you was the only option. That I was taken care of by someone else. That Tray guy said that once he injected mommy, there’d be no going back and he’d have to deal with the consequences. Tray then told him he’d done it and it’d take a couple of days, but will slowly kill mommy. Then the guy on the phone told the other one that he was in, and he’d collect his reward once it was confirmed or something like that.”

Everett tore off out of the room and next thing they all knew, he was storming in, dragging in her doctor. After everyone had repeated what happened, Sage told him everything that Hudson had just informed them of. The doctor asked a few questions and then ran from the room. It was a whirlwind of activity from then on, for both Ember and Hudson. Not knowing exactly what was given to her no one knew what exactly to do. It was like a shot in the dark. Hudson was questioned more and apparently something that Hudson had said rang a bell with one of the five doctors that were circulating the room.

Once they did what they thought would save her – they had to wait and see – Rufus pulled all the doctors back in the room, and the plan was revised. This time, we were all to act as if Hudson and Ember had died. Sage wasn’t sure how he was going to handle being away from them, but he needed this to end, and he needed it to end now. He was claiming his family and his life back. The only thing that scared him about this whole plan was not being with Ember if she were to wake or worse… He needed to save them. Save them all. He needed to rescue Jada.

Of course, they had an enormous gaping hole in their plan because none of them were sure why killing Hudson and Ember mattered. But they all knew it had to do with Sage. Today as he had to pretend to mourn the loss of his family – his heart truly broke even though it was not entirely real – he guessed he’d find out soon enough.

Sage
had taken a deep breath before he walked into Rufus’ headquarters of sorts. Honestly, he didn’t know what to expect him to say, but Sage worried that things were only going to be getting worse. Somehow, a month had passed since the passing of his wife and son. Nothing had come of it, but a broken heart for Sage. He had nothing without them. Everyone around him wanted to ‘make things better’, but really, how could they? He was alone. Sage’s heart beat and did its daily functions, but it didn’t do anything further from that. It kept him alive, to endure the pain he lived in continuously. To watch Everett and Kimberly fall apart the way they did…

“Hey Sage,” Trainor called out, breaking Sage from his thoughts.

He wanted to beat the shit of the man for breaking his world apart, but he wanted answers more. He wanted a reason for his world falling apart. Though nothing would justify the killing of innocent people, he still needed answers. No, it was more than a need for Sage. It was eating him alive. The guilt, the helplessness, the hopelessness suffocated him on a daily basis.

“What are you doing here?” Trainor greeted him, his smile falling, but not completely gone. “I heard about your loss man. I’m so sorry. I can’t even imagine what it must feel like to lose so much like that. If you need me, brother, you know all you need to do is call me.”

Grinding his teeth to keep from decking this man in the mouth, he swallowed past the constant lump of grief in his throat. “Yeah, sure.” He said shortly. “Rufus called me. He…”

Trainor looked around them before placing his hand on Sage’s shoulder. He wanted to grab the fucking thing and break it in two, but he had to wait. Maybe something would be given that would help him understand his son’s final words. Maybe something will help him understand what the hell happened to Ember and why she could never bounce back. Maybe something… Anything… A sob threatened to escape from deep within his hollow chest.

“Look, you know you’re like a brother to me, so losing them was like losing a piece of myself too,” Trainor stated as he looked around them again. “So, that’s the reason I’m telling you this.”

His jaw was clenched so tightly together that he swore his teeth were going to break with the effort. “What,” Sage growled.

“Rufus put the hit out on your woman and kid, man. He said you were too distracted with them, and he couldn’t have you hurting his bottom line. Even had me call it in.”

Grabbing him by the throat, Sage hauled him from his feet. “You considered us family, yet you called the order in. Some fucking family!” Sage hissed before punching him with all the force he could muster in the face. When Trainor fell limp in his hold, Sage threw him over his shoulder and carried him to Rufus’ office.

Flinging the door open with such force that the door bounced off the wall, Sage had to shove it open again before he stormed into the office. Throwing Trainor into the chair next to him, he heard his groans. Slamming his fists down on the desk, he looked a very shocked Rufus in the face.

“Do I mean so fucking little to you? Have you only ever saw me as a damn paycheck? Was I never your family? Has this whole fucking thing just been some kind of game for you to watch me suffer?” He roared, pounding his fists into the man’s desk with each question. The veins in his neck were protruding, and his face was hot with anger. Right now, anger ran over the suffocating grief and for this he was glad it had.

“Now, son…” Rufus started but was cut off by Sage.

“Don’t you call me that!” He roared as he flung the desk that separated them across the room as if it weighed nothing, the light weight of paper.

In the beginning, Sage had thought this was all a fucking plan. But when he heard the machines, saw the bodies, and their chests never moved, he wanted everyone dead.
Everyone!
It was all supposed to be a fucking plan. It was never meant to be a reality. Sage wanted to blame Rufus, Ember’s parents, but really it was his fault that the world lost such bright lights a month ago. Everett and Kimberly had come by the house he’d bought for his family, both grief-stricken and at a loss. He’d shut everyone out. His grief was too much. It had taken on a life form of its own. Sage didn’t want to hurt someone that he’d later regret if he could ever breathe again. He sat at that house and spent all his time in the library or the gym. In the library, Sage cried his eyes out, but in the gym he remembered every moment and punched it into the bags, ran it out on the treadmill, lifted it in weights, but one thing he never did was forget. Sage would never let himself forget that because of him, he’d cost so many people pain. But worst yet, he caused two incredible people that had so much to offer the world, to lose their light and leave. Leave him here alone, broken, and wanting to join them.